Chapter 91

BigNutz: Master Interviewer!?

“There the fuck she is!” BigNutz exclaimed as soon as I entered. “The Fishbowl Head herself! Long time no see!”

He went in for a hug but I sidestepped him.

“No hugging, okay, I get it. Gotta up hold that badass image.”

I didn’t respond and went and sat in our booth, where Stephen already was. I didn’t mean to be rude to the guy or anything, but I didn’t yet know how I wanted to play this. Should I be myself? Should I play up the badass-ness? I wished I could ask Stephen but it was too late for that.

The streamer eventually followed me over and sat across from us.

“So? What am I here for? All your man there told me is you wanted to talk to me. How could I turn down the opportunity? But pretty lame of you to not let me record.”

“One of your recordings made things a lot more difficult for me,” I said, talking calmer and slower than I normally did.

“More difficult? I made you fucking famous as hell.” He put his hands up. “But, I know, you also did the same for me. The way I see it, we both are in each other’s debt.”

“Why were you even there?” Stephen asked. “You just happened to stumble on that battlefield?”

“Crazy, right?” As he talked he played with a strand of his hair. It was braided, just the one, but thick. “Just was world hopping. Saw a bunch of people in a long forgotten world. Wanted to see what was up. Had no idea what awaited me. Fuck I am lucky!” At the last sentence he swatted his braid, spinning it around.

“I don’t really buy that,” Stephen said.

He was accusing him of… something, but BigNutz paid him no mind, either oblivious or playing it cool.

“No, seriously, I’m known for this kind of stuff. Have you not watched any of my streams?” When neither of us responded he just shook his head sadly. “Even before you I was a rising star. I got some fame for exploring obscure worlds and just seeing what’s what in em. But that morning… that morning sent me to the fucking moon, man.”

His eyes sparkled with stars.

“I get over a million views a stream now. That’s like unheard of, man.”

“Was it worth risking your life for?” I asked. “If those User Killers had gotten their hands on you… who knows what would have happened.”

He started to play with his braid again. “Yeah, you said. I think it was worth it, though. I mean, nothing bad happened to me. Thanks to you,” he quickly added. Then brought things back to his original question: “So… why am I here?”

“I want you to be the one to interview me.”

His hand stopped playing with his braid and his mouth dropped. “Uh, what?”

“I want you to have first dibs.”

He became a ball of energy, rocking around in his seat. “You can’t be serious. Me? WHat’s that catch? You probably have countless deals lined up, I can’t possibly pay you as much as them.”

I shook my head. “I don’t want money. I just want to get some things out about myself and I don’t want to go through the glam and glitter of all the other methods. I just want a chill, personal kind of feel.”

“Kind and personal? That is totally fucking me bro. I got this. I won’t let you down! Oh, my god, you are the best thing to ever happen to me!”

He reached across the table and grabbed my hand, shaking it so fast it felt like it would come out of its socket.

Support creative writers by reading their stories on Royal Road, not stolen versions.

“The feeling… runs mostly one way. For now,” I said after I’d dislodged my hand. “I recently realized I have something I can do to make this platform I’ve been given do a lot of good.”

“Whatever you got in mind, I’m your guy!” He did an obscene gesture, sort of pointing directly at his crotch. “Oh, uh, sorry, I do that for the streams. Gotta play up the BigNutz name, y’know how it is.”

I most certainly didn’t know how that was, but it made me laugh anyway. Stephen just looked super extra not okay with my choice of interviewer. And I guess I could see his point of view, too, but he was a weirdo. And I doubt any official person we could have worked with would have been anything other than painfully boring. BigNutz fit me better.

But, yeah, maybe I needed to convince him not to do as many ball presentations when I was on stream.

“I think you’re perfect for what we want to do,” I said.

“You do!?” Stephen and BigNutz said at the same time, at complete opposite ends of the spectrum. Stephen in pure shock and BigNutz with a confident hell yeah kind of attitude. They both looked at each other.

“Hey, what’s with your tone?” The streamer confronted him before I could.

“Uh, just, I dunno. You’re not what I imagined. Well, I mean, you are what I imagined from your username and how you acted in the video…” Stephen could tell he was just digging himself a bigger hole. “All I’m saying, is I wanted a professional to handle the interview. That’s all.”

BigNutz scratched his chin, only the tiniest of stubble on it. “I get you. You’re right to be skeptical. But this isn’t my first rodeo.”

“It isn’t?” I said, honestly impressed and intrigued.

“Nope! I’ve done tons of interviews. You guys really didn’t watch any of my stuff, huh?”

I just shook my head but Stephen’s eyes were already looking through his content. As he went along, his eyes got wider.

“Darcy, you’ve got to see this,” he said and then threw his screen inbetween us.

At first I didn't get what he meant. I scrolled through endless clips of BigNutz doing weird and wacky things in increasingly bizarre places but eventually, another type of content revealed itself. He visited orphanages, a sad reality that still hadn't been totally fixed in the Interverse. The overall condition of them were far better than back on Earth, and they found good and loving homes much easier and quicker... But there still was a limbo period for a lot of the kids that could be a dark time.

Despite every preconceived notions we had from BigNutz, he was actually a super genuine guy. He went to the orphanages, entertaining the kids and getting them started in streaming themselves. Which, probably wouldn't make a lot of adults happy, but for the longest time people could make good livings off of it and it unquestionably made the kids happy. As a flipped through there were countless images of him surrounded by kids, looking like a king.

"And before you ask, no, I don't just do all that for clout," BigNutz said. "I was an orphan, too. It's my way of giving back. Giving the kids some hope and a way forward. I believe in them so that they'll believe in themselves and not need any fucking parents that may not come."

His hands were in tight fists as he talked. I wondered if he never found any parents and how hard that must have been for him. I felt like I was seeing him with completely fresh eyes.

"BigNutz." He looked up at me, his hands slackened. "I know now with complete certainty that you're the man for the job. When do you want to do it?"

He broke into a wide grin.

"How about in an hour?"

#

You had to appreciate the speed at which this kid lived his life. When he said we could do it in an hour, I figured that meant start right then but would take at least another three or four to get everything set up.

No. In an hour he had planned the whole thing, set up the perfect framing spot for the main camera, and lit the Interverse in fire when he put out the word that this was happening. His waiting room for the event grew by the millions. I eventually had to stop looking at it or I was gonna throw up.

So instead I looked at my feet, at the dirty wrecked street my fancy chair was placed on, looking completely out of place. After probably two minutes of back and forth, BigNutz had convinced us that we should meet back where it all started for both of us. The random battlefield that had brought us crashing into each other's lives.

I could see the poetry in it. But I wasn't completely sold on this being the best place for my message. But I had emphasized I didn't want clean and normal. So this would have to do.

"You ready?" Stephen asked me from slightly off camera.

"Can you believe this? Multiple millions of people waiting. All in an hour." I was positively sweating bullets inside my Fishbowl, grateful that no one could see me right now, not even Stephen. I decided to turn off that feature Netta set up just in case something messed up. Paranoia at its finest. But it provided me some privacy in this stressful situation.

"The man is a machine, what can I say. I think you were right about him. So, again: you ready? After this you'll be even more of a legend."

"It makes me want to throw up, honestly. But I'll do it. For the little girls." I held up my fist.

"For the little girls!" Stephen fist bumped it. "Jesus, don't make me say that, it sounds messed up coming from me."

I died laughing and Stephen smiled, his duty of calming me down done, and disappeared behind a wrecked car. I could still see his head poking above it as he watched me, making me laugh harder.

BigNutz took up position in front of the camera.

"Alright, Fishbowl, we are all good on my end." He looked back at me over his shoulder.

I nodded. "Let's do it."

BigNutz counted us down.

My whole body tensed up again, imagining that viewed number growing by millions per second.

"For the little girls," I whispered to myself as the countdown came to it's end.