Chapter 10

Sam N. Fillet: Master… Chef?

Not too long after that, I teleported back to my humble abode. I wanted to immediately crash into my bed but I now had a roommate to worry about.

I'd held Sam's hand as we made the trip but once in my apartment he let go and started to explore.

"Wait there for a second, okay?" I went to the hallway closet and lugged down a pile of blankets and two pillows.

I threw a blanket over the couch and deposited the rest in a pile beside it. Sam had wandered off and I found him staring up at my big aquarium.

He pointed at my goldfish. "He is like me." He put his hand up to his ear and turned toward the tank. "He thinks very highly of you."

"You can understand him?" I was excited at the possibility of communicating with my life long pet.

"Only a little. I might be able to pick up more the longer we have to get to know each other."

"Oh, cool. I hope so. Could you... at least tell him that I love him?" It was insane how much one tiny goldfish had gotten me through. I wanted to make sure he knew.

Sam smiled. "He knows. He loves you, too."

I put my hand on the tank and Percy ran into the glass a few times.

"Aw. You guys are gonna make me tear up." I actually did have something in my eye and wiped it.

My goldfish swam away suddenly and went inside his wrecked ship home.

"He had to poop." Sam said, all matter of fact.

"Annnd touching moment over." I held my hand on the glass for a moment longer, laughed, and went back to the couch.

Sam followed me and jumped up onto the pile with the blankets and pillows.

"Is this my slumber fortress?"

"I mean, no. You get the couch." I picked him up and put him down on it but he just scampered back onto the pile.

He ripped the blanket off the couch and wrapped himself with it, snuggling up, a big grin on his face as he sighed. "You have a lovely home, Miss. A real life of luxury you've got going."

I chuckled. "I don’t know about that. But thanks. I'm glad you like it. You sure you don't want the couch?"

"No, that's for you." He patted the couch cushion.

"Oh, uh, my bed is—" Sam pouted. I sighed. "Right. Sleepover. Okay, but just for tonight."

Sam clapped and tumbled off his tower. I caught him and put him back on top of it

"Thanks!" He was about to say more but a huge yawn overcame him.

"Bed time?" I asked.

He nodded. "Thanks for saving me, Miss. And... Thanks for letting... me..."

And he was out, completely dead to the world. He looked cute, all bundled up on top of a pile of blankets and pillows. It was very strange to have a walking and talking meat man in my apartment but, honestly, his company was welcome.

As he started to snore I made myself comfortable, dislodging a pillow and one of the blankets from the pile. Once comfy, I closed my eyes.

... and opened them again near instantly. I may have been exhausted but I also was riding a high of my first Combat Quest. We accomplished so much from just one day, one Quest... but it still wasn't enough. I needed more. If I was going to have any chance of winning that tournament we needed to grow, faster.

And what did you need when you wanted to improve Stats rapidly? A teacher.

I brought up the search bar and searched for "combat teacher." Literally millions of hits popped into my vision. I couldn't believe how many there were, specializing in all sorts of areas. Some narrow focused, others claimed to offer an array of expertise to make you well rounded. They all had one thing in common: the tournament was mentioned in every listing.

Of course, it made sense that there would be a whole range of people trying to capitalize on the huge wave of interest that was now on the combat side of the Interverse. And the sad thing was that probably meant that most of these were from scammers, or at least people who would do the bare minimum. How could I ever separate the good from the bad?

I sighed, but continued to scroll.

[ I'll turn you into a Combat Goddess! GIRLS ONLY 18 AND UP ]

I briefly considered accepting that one, if only to see what Stephen's reaction to it would be.

[ Want to learn to choke your opponents out? I'm your guy... ;) ]

Okay, why the hell were so many of these thirst traps? I rolled my eyes and almost closed out the search completely but a listing caught my eye.

[ Seeking to help those cursed with bad Starter Skills. Must be a member of Statistic Anomalies. I will train you to take what was wrongfully never given. ]

Geez, my emotions were out of whack cause that last line almost made me start crying again. Sure it could have been a well worded trap, taking advantage of some of the most unfortunate lives of the Interverse... but what if it wasn't. What if it was genuine?

I clicked on it. There wasn't a lot of information provided, not even a name or picture of the teacher, extra sketch. But I just couldn't let go of that last line.

I read everything on the listing and found near the end that he offered free consultations—he wouldn't even accept money at all until he agreed to train you. That made it seem way less likely to be a scam. A scammer would want that money in as soon as possible. I felt a bit better about it and scheduled a consultation for two. A bunch of options for the times popped up. I decided on a 6PM. I probably should have asked Stephen first but I didn't see how we wouldn't be done with our first battle royale experience by then.

This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version.

[ Booking... booked! Adding reminder to your calendar. ]

I yawned and stretched. That final task taken care of and the exhaustion finally caught up to me. I fell asleep before I could even close out the window. My snores joined Sam's.

#

I awoke to the best smell I think I'd ever smelt in my entire life. My eyes shot open and I sat up, looking for the source. Unsurprisingly, it came from the kitchen.

But what was surprising was the person manning the oven. Sam N. Fillet ran and jumped all over the counter, grabbing ingredients and adding them to something. He jumped down and I heard the oven open. He pulled a pan out, the source of the great smells, and slid in another pan. The oven door slammed and he was up on the counter again, a pizza cutter in his hand.

He noticed me watching with my mouth agape. "You're up! Would you like to do the honors?"

I rolled off the couch and joined him in the kitchen. The pizza cutter tipped me off to what kind of food I was about to see but, even so, I gasped at what I saw. A perfectly cooked pizza, lightly charred on the sides like I liked it, with banana peppers, pepperoni, and mushrooms. The cheese looked delicious, cheesy but not too runny that it would slide off your pizza in mid bite, the absolute worst crime a pizza could commit as far as I was concerned.

Nothing at this level of beauty had ever come from my kitchen. I recognized all the ingredients as at least coming from my pantry but to use them to such a masterful degree was way beyond my measly cooking Stat.

"Sam, you made this?"

"Yep!" He held out the pizza cutter to me.

I pushed it back to him. "No way, man, this pizza does not deserve what I would do to it. I'm, uh, not the best at cutting pizza."

Sam giggled but thankfully didn't press me. He made one cut, straight down the middle of the pizza, and then his hands were a blur. I blinked and then the pie was perfectly cut.

I whistled. "How the heck did you learn all this?"

"I'm a chef," he said with a proud smile and puffed out chest.

"That's amazing! I had no idea… can I have some?"

"Yep!" He slid off the counter and went to sit at my kitchen table.

I supposed he was a chef and not a server. I didn't mind, he cooked all this, the least I could do is get my own plate. I took some down and slid a slice onto each dish. The cheese pulled in that satisfying cheesy way, but somehow broke off on its own, leaving no mess.

I was gonna cry if this pizza wasn't anything other than the best thing I'd ever tasted. I didn't see how it wouldn't be.

I sat a plate down in front of Sam and about tripped over my feet in my haste to sit down. I could not wait to try the pizza.

Sam ignored his, his eyes wide as he waited for my reaction, literally on the edge of his seat and, oh no. He tumbled onto the floor. But he immediately scrambled back into his seat and flashed me a thumbs up.

I brought the pizza to my mouth. Took a bite.

Oh. My. God.

Disgusting. The absolute worst thing I have ever—I can't keep this up, I'm joking, it was to die for. I felt like my taste buds were exploding. There were familiar tastes, I could tell all the ingredients he used, but somehow he had brought out their latent potential. Even though my food was off brand and cheap, the flavors tasted like they would have cost one thousand Versecoins—per bite.

I noticed that it was hard to see Sam. My eyes were overflowing with tears, like the pizza was some kind of deeply religious spiritual moment.

"You like it?" Sam asked, underselling my feelings to the max.

"I love it." I said, in between bites. "You totally have to make this for Stephen sometime."

"I love cooking. But especially cooking for my friends." He smiled so huge my heart just about burst. I admittedly cried more at the sight of him.

"I'm so glad I found you, Sam. Do I really have to take you home?"

To my surprise, he stopped to consider my words, rubbing his chin with his little fingers. Why was everything he did so adorable?

"I think I like it here, already. Way more than my old home. So... I think I have a new Quest."

[ Quest chance missed! ]

"Oh, shit, we never even formally accepted your Quest at all did we?" I hit myself on the forehead.

Sam shook his head. "It's okay, we were very tired. This next one is for real. As long as it's okay that I stay here with you...?" He gave me the biggest puppy dog eyes. Which weren't even necessary.

"Of course, Sam. I know we just met but I already can't imagine things without you." And I wasn't just saying that because of his cooking skills.

...I think.

He beamed up at me. "Great! Then, this is what I really need."

[ A Special Request (for real this time)!

A Lone Fillet's Longing

Sam N. Fillet has lost his siblings! Search all over the Interverse to reunite them!

Siblings found: 0/3 ]

[ Accept Quest? ]

Before even asking for more details I mashed accept.

That finally handled, THEN I broke into the questions: "There are more of you??"

He nodded. "Yep, three!"

"And you're all... uh, fish people?"

"Yep!"

"And all of you are chefs?" My brain and belly both tingled with the possibility of having four master chefs at my beck and call.

He shook his head. "They all have their own specialties."

He didn't elaborate on that and I so wanted to know more, but I got a message from Stephen.

[ Darcy! You're up, right? I'm gonna send you an invite, get over here, how do you feel about dropping into a battle royale match? ]

I almost choked on my pizza. A battle royale? I didn't live completely under a rock, I knew all about the fights to the death where only one person (or a team) could emerge victorious. They'd been around from even the Earth days. But how in the world did he expect for us to go from my very first Combat Quest to a battle to the death?

He annoyingly kept sending the invite, making a ding noise go off repeatedly.

"Is that the doorbell?" Sam asked.

I laughed. "No, it's Stephen. He wants me to join him for some training. I hate to dine and dash, but..."

Sam waved his hands like mad. "No, no, it's alright. I will clean up. There will be plenty of leftovers when you're back."

"Cold pizza," I said, already salivating at the thought of it.

He nodded vigorously and took the plates, begging to put the food away.

"Thanks so much, Sam!" I pause on the accept invite button. "Also? We will find your family. I promise."

He smiled. "I have no doubt, Miss."

His little smile was the last thing I saw before being teleported away. Stephen's face replaced the scene of my kitchen, so close to me that Sam's face was overlaid on top of his for a moment and I just wanted to die laughing. Stephen was saying something, his mouth moving a mile a minute but at my face he stopped.

"What's so funny?" He asked.

"Nothing, not worth explaining." I looked around where he brought me. "What were you saying, where are we?"

It could be best described as a giant bubble, clouds and the sun visible all around. I walked forward and the floor beneath me went full see through as well, giving me a view of a large land mass I'd never seen before, explosions and gunfire going off everywhere.

"I was saying that we've only got a few minutes until the next match so if you've got questions on what we're about to do, you better ask now. You do know what a battle—" I just glared at him. "Okay, good. Sorry I was just checking."

"So that's where we will be fighting?" I pointed below us.

"Yep. There are a bunch of different maps but this one is like the default. Best place to start."

"And what are we inside exactly, a floating egg?"

He shrugged. "Dunno what it is officially but it's basically just a fancy waiting room where we get to watch. It's also slowly filling up with people for the next round, you can see them around in their own eggs."

I walked over to the wall of the egg and stared out and, sure enough, we were surrounded by other floating eggs. I could just barely make out the Users in the other ones near by. One stood out, a tiny figure absolutely bursting with rainbows. Couldn't tell their age or sex but if their height was anything to go on they were way too young to be doing something like this. But perhaps that was an old fashioned way of thinking. Combat was now as bombastic as the most addicting video games. It made sense that people of all ages would gather. Especially in preparation for the tournament and its prizes.

An explosion of noise went off. I thought it was more explosions but it turned out to be a sound of victory. The floor of the egg zoomed in on the final remaining combatant, a blood soaked guy that looked kind of like a Roman warrior but decked out in scifi-esque clothes. He roared, looking vicious and bad ass. The image was ruined when he threw his weapons down and did the floss, a dance move so out of date that I could almost hear all the other people watching groan.

The man kept dancing but the feed was cut, replaced with:

[ Challengers! Prepare yourself for the next round! ]

Followed by a fifteen second countdown.

"Fuck! I've still got questions, damn it!" The panic set in. Was I really ready for all this? I wanted to run home and hide under the covers.

"It's gonna be okay, Darce, we got this! We don't have to win, we are just here for the experience." Stephen said, trying to cheer me up but I could see the countdown reflected in his eyes, what was about to happen an inescapable reality.

But I took a deep breath, centering myself. "Okay. Let's do it."

[ Match starting in... ]

My vision was nothing but giant numbers.

[3]

I had no time to think.

[2]

No time to worry.

[1]