A happily ever and after

“I am sorry.” I was lip tight, Nera was visibly angry and an apology was what could fix it, a chicken bucket would soothe her. For now, the premonition is that she wouldn’t bear me a glance. She finally spoke, “We need to break up.” My breath caught up in my throat, it can’t be. A mistake, formidable.

I meekly breathed out “Nera” She hadn’t spared me. It was done. “We are married. Breaking up is left afar.” I had wished death upon me, I was gone like a goner. “Nera you can’t try to break up with me just because I want to name our child ‘Skewer Toll’ That's cool.” The air was chill, and I could see Nera grow horns, but I was gone. I had to brace myself for the intelligent mouth; Cielo Castilo why do you have to piss the woman who could stew you and make it a toll. Nera adjusted her silver-rimmed glasses on the nose bridge and gave me a side look. My hands were maneuvering the stirring wheel with a film of sweat, and I had played it cool. “Cielo Castilo, You should stop squinting your eyes and start squinting that brain of yours.” That was my Nera. She had ended me with just a sentence. Her game was not my bar, I could never surpass my woman and that’s what had hinged me on her. A chuckle left me and lightened the air “You bury me.” And an elbowed had nipped my ribs and Nera laughed. Her laugh pars the melody of Beethoven or Mozart whatever those names are, my heart would burst into butterflies in my chest, a pleasing tickle. I could end the world just for a mere promise of keeping her laugh and sweet smile preserved. I am just a lover, this must be love maybe. If I could stem a term to this feeling it would be falling in love all over again. “It’s my last lecture, I offered to my students. I promised them to bring my husband. You have earned yourself quite a name Mr.Castilo.” Nera had pursued her dream, she never had one. She went along the line and did what she left like, A philosophy teacher. She earned herself invitations from universities and for this week's success, it was her farewell lecture for the students until she was ready again. I paid lunch for her students to take care of her and Nera sang my name famously, oh lord I love this woman. And with my tread of thought, we arrived at our destination. I helped her out of the car and we made our way to the classroom, I walked a step behind Nera with her hand supporting her back, it hadn’t changed much. Time had leaped backward and we were kids again, falling in love. It hadn’t, much had changed and now we had our own name of love. A pleasant smile had stuck to my face, I couldn't be happier yet I will be. I will be a father to my child that Nera and I had made, with love, our own name of love, Skewer Toll. My memory laned to when we had found Nera was pregnant. I was an Idiot, her stupid, her idiot.

Fool for her.

We were returning from our first ultrasound appointment, and while sitting in the car I broke our giddy bubbles of glee with, “Nera, I bought something for you.” I took out a small paper wrap with daisies on it and handed it to her, before she could say anything I broke in, “I was over the moon when you told me we were making our team stronger with one more little rebel. I was so happy that I could barely make sense of anything. The only thing that was displaying in funny text in the back of my head was I love you, I love you Nera and I am going to be a dad. I felt as if my life has never been hard and happiness is the only thing I have humanly felt. There was not one emotion I could say out loud except for happiness. For making life bearable, for making me bearable, I am grateful beyond word so take this as a token of gratitude.” Nera nodded and smiled while retorting, “How many trials of practice did you run to verse your ode to me? And that too without stuttering?” and we both burst into soft heartful chuckles and I continued with. “Nera, I love you and I bought this dress for when we got married to gift you yet it was too early, with our first meeting I always knew you were the one for me. I bought it when we were “just dating” It looked as if it was tailor-made for you and you only before anyone could bat their eyes on it, and while coming home I realized it was a maternity dress not that trendy summer dress. I was embarrassed but won’t deny it fluttered my heart when I thought of you being glowy and pregnant. It was not my intention while buying it but it felt good. I took a U-turn and went to my parent's house to ask my mom to keep it until it ever happened. I am living that dream today. When we’ll grow in this pregnancy I hope to see you in this dress. Thank you so much for making my life bearable.” I was one step away from crying when answered with silence teary eyes the brightest smile and heart-filled happiness.

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A piece of memory, I am the happiest man yet to be happier. We were outside the classroom, and Nera squeezed my hand consoling me, telling me “It is going to be okay” and I know it will be. We entered the class and there was the white flower confetti shower, I needed to keep this secret from Nera I paid for all this, it was her farewell for better. The board was covered with silly quotes that she goes by along with some decorations, Louis blue balloons, and the blackboard headed with “Mrs. Nera You glow like the light you are”. My face was pleasantly stretched with a small smile, seems like it’s worth it. I couldn’t help Nera with the nature of her state, but I did what I could that let her know she was not alone. Nera is resilient, a wonder of nature, a woman. She had carried everything all by herself in these endeavors of nature and all I could do it hold her hand, in this fast-changing world. She needed to sit down now and let me do it for her. 40 of her students and one me, waiting for her to react. My heart is on choke with 40 others, we had our bets made.

Nera smiled, she smiled and my heart busted. She chuckled softly, her smile softening our hearts. Her eyes scintillating stars, a beam of happiness; that was my Nera. If I could name this feeling, I am falling in love all over again. A call of life so pleasant I forgive it for everything, all the heartbreaks can be overlooked if Nera stays here forever. An eternity of happiness for Nera, that’s all I ask for. Nera verses her gratitude mellow “Oh so my husband had greed pave his way hmmm. A smart man indeed.” Well, she knows me too well, denying will be foolish to do. “so the celebration of the walking assignment taking a break have all of you thrown a feast right in your lecture hall? Facts served, Enjoy everyone. I am pleased though. I am grateful that you have it prepared for me.” Nera might come out rather less excited, she is blooming inside. Her words aren’t shallow and as always her eyes say it all. 40 people with a giddy feeling of their teacher being fluffy as not her usual and her husband who has his heart busted open in his chest. Nera comes with, “ Everyone I shall return the favor, I would be rude if I don’t. No lecture for today. I’ll order fried chicken and Cola for everyone as a token of gratitude, thank you for taking care of me and being diligent students, My journey of life is turning bumpy as it’s visible. Thank you for trying to ease it up, your intentions are indented on my heart, once again thank you. I wish all of you well for the rest of your life.” She took a pause and turned herself to me “And thanks for respecting my husband, he is truly a funny man, I hope you had him lose his pocket quite a sum. Cielo, I’ll see you at home.” She blushed while continuing with a film of happy tears on her rims “You bury me.” And buried herself in my chest. The giddy new adults cheered their mentor and her lovesick husband. Life is bearable with Nera, Nera is worth living this life. She is worth everything, everything, and mine.

I wrapped my hands around her, embracing my love, my Nera. She is all I know about love and she is my world. I can live without her, life is cruel and it’s a cold possibility yet I don’t want to live without her, she buries me. Letting myself melt in this little ball of the world in her nape “I love how, even in a room full of people you make we’re in our own world. The sound of conversations fades away and all I want to hear is your voice” and my silence is serene, Nera molds against me; this time softer, gentler. We let ourselves be vulnerable with spectators, and they learn that the philosophy of love is true when you want to love. We are not Romeo or Juliet, a play performance; We were Nera and Cielo, buried in love. Love will drown you to depth, don’t fight it. Let yourself love and let yourself be loved, hold a hand the same in this fast-paced world.

“You will father a cute girl,a girl, Cielo”