Gu Yining is a wonderful woman whose attributes are above average. Her mild temperament makes her attractive while her fashion is an added bonus. Ye Mama truly likes her, while Ye Papa approves of her as his future daughter-in-law.

After Mubai's 5th date with her, an engagement was immediately arranged. There was no more time for him to work as often as before, so he was left with no choice but to have someone take over his job in the meantime.

Mubai also realized that he no longer had time to spend with Alexander, which made him a little sad but his mind would then be replaced with future plans that were fast approaching. Every weekend, he would go on a date with Yining, while half the time during the weekdays, his parents would force him to manage the coming engagement party. He was feeling even more stressed compared to a day's work being Fei Long's assistant.

Does he even love his fiance? He wasn't sure, but since his parents were all eager to push a certain lady to him, he will accept what they want. Despite all these, he felt there was something missing and he didn't know what it was. He never felt this confused before.

"Is Ye Mama sending you somewhere today again..?"

A familiar soft voice asked behind Mubai, making him turn with a smile, his eyes sparkled with life that was not known to himself. "Sadly yes." He replied, shrugging the tasks he needed to do for the day. He really found it tiring.

Alexander looked at him with his forced smile, his hazelnut eyes a swirl of pain. But Mubai never noticed this. "You don't sound very enthusiastic. Haha..." Even his laugh was hollow.

Mubai walked towards where Alexander stood, by the window in the second floor's corridor. The sun was high up in the sky, its bright light shining onto Alexander's blonde hair, making it glow to golden strands. It looked fascinating, making Mubai's smile deepen.

But his smile only caused Alexander unbearable pain. He never left, however. He merely waited for Mubai to get closer to him and stare at his own pair of eyes like they always did when they talked. Despite his feelings, he couldn't shy away from an opportunity to be able to stare at Mubai's grey eyes that made him feel electrified and happy. Hence, even with the tingling pain in his chest, he smiled, because that was all he needed to do.

"Just... Preparing for it is tiresome. I wish it wasn't my engagement party, ha..." Mubai humored, a soft chuckle escaped his lips.

I wish so too... "You can't say that in front of your wife-to-be, Bai.." He was in pain at the thought, but what right did he have to stop his friend's wedding? Who was he to fight for his feelings? It seemed like it was even too late to say anything at all...

"Eh. Surely she wouldn't mind. She probably feels the same." Mubai shrugged. "Do you want to come with me? It'll be less boring with you around, or do you have anything to do today—"

"I'll go with you." He instantly replied, making Mubai's smile deepen. Even if he knew it was wrong, he wanted to feel happy, even if a little, before the person in his heart gets married.

"Then come!" Mubai cheerfully said, leading the way himself. Alexander walked after him, his hazelnut eyes stared at Mubai's back with deep longing. Is this pain really necessary? Love is such a sharp double edged sword. I feel happy just seeing you and sad once you look away...

Mubai drove for an hour, stopping at a tea plantation. He needed to make a huge order to please the Gu Family who seemed to love exotic teas the most.

"Rich!" Alexander exclaimed after hearing the plan. He felt so envious for Gu Yining to be catered this much by Mubai. Spending huge sum of money just because of an afternoon hobby. This seemed ridiculous in Alexander's ears, but it only deepened the pain in his heart at the thought of Mubai's efforts to please his wife-to-be.

"Yea. Mom said to do this." Mubai indifferently said, walking around the plantation. There were many different kinds and he didn't exactly know which one was which. Tea was like any pebble he sees by the road; they all looked the same.

Alexander was caught off guard by Mubai's response. He had noticed his friend's indifferent attitude to his fiance despite their frequent dates. Was his indifference a show of disinterest? Or merely his facade to the whole thing?

Before he could stop himself, Alexander unconsciously blurted his thoughts. "Don't you like your fiance? Why must you follow Ye Mama's every word? Can't you do things by yourself? Marriage is not a game..."

Alexander wanted to cover his mouth, but his words spilled like raindrops. Once it begun, it would fall until a while. "S-sorry. I didn't mean to say yo—"

Mubai turned to him in thought, his grey eyes in wonder. "I've wondered about it too. Whether I liked her, whether it was fine this way."

"Then why.." Are you not doing anything?

"What's the point? Marrying or not, it wouldn't change anything in me."

"Are you fine, really? What if you suddenly start liking someone else? What happens to Yining then?"

Mubai shrugged, a small smile laced his lips. "I'll just have to fall for her before that happens."

Hearing this, Alexander knew it was another task Mubai put himself into, and he knew very well he was gonna make it possible even if his life depended on it. He was gonna make himself fall for her with everything he got...

Mubai, how can you be so straightlaced... Alexander sighed, feeling exhausted at heart. "And if your heart cannot change?" He asked, almost a whisper.

"What did you say? Repeat it to me again because I missed it." Mubai put his ear in front of Alexander's mouth, clueless to the latter's turmoil.

"You idiot."

Mubai heard his words clearly and he felt a little lost. He turned to Alexander to confront him but what met his eyes were a pair of passionate hazelnut eyes that stared into his soul, causing his chest to skip a beat. His grey eyes quivered, feeling a faint jolt of electricity passed through under his skin.

The sensation was new and strange, leaving him gazing in wonder at Alexander. "..." He opened his mouth to say something but no words could be formed.

Meanwhile, Alexander's attention was lost on Mubai's lips, wanting very much to give them love. His heart burned with passion, his mind screaming with injustice. Why couldn't it be me? Why must you marry another?

"Why must you marry?" He unconsciously asked, his emotions making him feel miserable, broken and tormented. He was confused, almost going crazy with the constant pain in his gut, his emotional burden growing heavier and heavier the longer he spent with the person he loved but cannot have.

Mubai could hear the pain in Alexander's voice, pricking his heart and making him feel nervous. His grey eyes were now layered with mist. "Because..." He didn't really know the right answer, for he merely followed his parents' wishes like he had always been. But for some reason, such reason felt inappropriate to say in front of Alexander whose hazelnut eyes were filled with powerful emotions he couldn't quite grasp.

"Alex.. are you okay?" He softly questioned, reaching out his hand to touch Alexander's arm but was evaded smoothly. This caused him to feel a little nervous, but he didn't understand why. Why did he feel sad being avoided? He didn't like Alexander avoiding him.

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He tried to reach for Alexander once more, but once again, he was avoided.

"Let's just go, if you are done. I'll wait for you at your car." Alexander suddenly said, turning to leave without another word. His heart was in so much pain he didn't know if he could remain standing by Mubai's side without crying.

Mubai's hand was left mid-air, with nowhere to land. Something in him felt strange, his gut causing him to feel nervous. Still, he didn't understand what it was about. His mind blind at sight, his heart dense to its core. Can love sprout still, or his blood will remain cold?

Why was he so blind to his own while perceptive to others?

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Time flew like never before for both Mubai and Alexander. After their outing to the tea plantation, something between them had changed. But even then, it didn't stop the engagement party from happening.

Days after, he was briefly given a break in preparation for his marriage. He recovered his healthy sleeping pattern, but what came with it was the constant wet dreams that begun from a long while ago.

He rarely had wet dreams because he was always set in making his job perfect to accommodate Fei Long, and even Feng Mian. So when he experienced that particular wet dream, he found it unusual and too realistic. Although that same wet dream visited him more often afterwards, sometimes the sensation would feel unreal while at times too realistic. He shrugged the thought away every time, thinking it was just him feeling sexually frustrated as of late.

But one day, in his attempts at getting close to Alexander after being avoided so many times, Mubai grabbed for his hand and he was surprised at the familiar sensation. He was conflicted, his heart drumming him with something, though a part of him refused to believe. Why? Because that meant Alexander liked him in that way, and what of his marriage to Gu Yining? The built-up tension of his parents to his marriage? He didn't like to see them ashamed and disappointed... But can he bear to lose Alexander? To be out of reach? To never spend good times as often?

Mubai was not a fool despite having just realized his heart, but was he too late? His grey eyes reached out to Alexander's hazelnut eyes, and he felt his chest clench... Was it really far gone?

"Let go, please..." Alexander softly pleaded, his heart burning his courage to reject slowly. He had tried to resist the temptation, over and again, but the heart cannot refuse the taste of sweetness it had already experienced, only wanting for more.

Mubai held onto his hand tighter, unconsciously tightening his grip. "Tell me, Alex... Do you visit me at night?"

Alexander's heart almost stopped, his eyes grew wide and panic flashed across his eyes. Nothing was missed by Mubai, and he felt his heart soar. Why? Why was he feeling so happy more than the times when Yining gave him kisses on his face? Even now, just being in contact with Alexander made him feel good.

Mubai looked at their connected hands in thought, his grey eyes swirling with complex feelings. But Alexander did not wait for him and slapped his hand away, not bothering to comment, neither denying nor agreeing.

Alexander dashed away, far away from Mubai who was left by his lonesome.

"Ever since before the announcement..." Mubai softly uttered, memories of Alexander flashing through his mind.

They used to spend most of their free time together, always able to talk non-stop inside his car and even shared the same interests after a while. Despite his business-oriented mindset that only knew how to serve Fei Long, he felt himself differ because Alexander was there to make him feel more human.

"Marriage..." The date was already set, and it was gonna be held in a month's time. Everyone already knew about it thanks to the engagement party. Even if he had feelings for Alexander, what use was it if he had to wed someone else?

There was no use pursuing his heart. It was better to let it all be. Let the heart cry and time will eventually fade it away.

But the heart never follows a timetable.

Once Mubai realized his feelings, he yearned for Alexander even more. Only, the latter was rarely in sight, still actively avoiding him. Mubai felt shameful for craving to be with another person while already marrying another, but can a heart not want what it desires?

Both Mubai and Alexander were tormented by the incoming wedding.

Whenever Mubai came home early for bed, he would find himself anticipating for Alexander's sneaky actions. He had deduced the man would sometimes visit him at night, and it resulted to him having so many wet dreams days prior.

And just as he expected, Alexander did come, thinking he was already deep asleep.

In the cover of the darkness, Alexander's soft footsteps tickled Mubai's ears, his senses more acute than awake. He very much anticipated Alexander's soft touch, the hands that laced his manhood on certain nights. He found himself parched, his heartbeat accelerating but careful to keep his breathing even and slow.

Mubai felt his lips wet, warmed by a pair of soft lips. It was tender, then deep. Alexander then parted his lips to extend his tongue inside Mubai's mouth. With slow, loving caress, Alexander wrapped Mubai's tongue in a hot exchange.

Alexander's tongue nabbed around Mubai's tongue and nibbled it with his lips. He was soon left panting for more, his hand reaching for his erection while his other hand cleverly slipped inside Mubai's pajama pants, swiftly taking hold of the already semi-erect manhood that was throbbing with vigor.

Alexander was a little bewildered at the fast reaction, but merely deduced that Mubai's body was getting used to his touch. After all, his visits numbered more than his fingers and toes.

He was soon left gasping as he reached his climax, his expert hand robbing against his membrane with so much desire to make love with Mubai. But he knew he cannot.

He restrained his moans, but that only made Mubai feel even more excited, his erection even harder. He wanted to move, but he didn't want to stop Alexander. He expected him to run if he made his move.

That night, both Mubai and Alexander silently felt ecstasy, both their desires mingled but unknown to one.

Then the next night after, Alexander did the same as Mubai made sure he finished work early. Fei Long had begun to suspect something was up, but it was none of his business.

With Mubai awaiting to be pleased by Alexander in his sleep, he strangely felt satisfied. There was some sadness, but there was also happiness.

Time went on and before Mubai knew, he was getting married in three days. He had been going home on time for 2 weeks, and every night, Alexander would come as if unable to part with the little solace he could get alone with Mubai at night, even if he took advantage of Mubai alone. After all, not for long, he would not be able to touch him anymore. Another person would...

Tonight might be the last time Mubai can enjoy Alexander's wondrous touch...

Can it only be said to be lust if he wanted the person so much? Or did lust only come about as a consequence to love? Whichever that was, Mubai felt he could no longer hold himself back.

When Alexander came per usual, Mubai immediately sprang up and pinned him on the bed, hands held tight above his head, while his legs were pinned together. Alexander was surprised, shock even, his heart beating so loudly. "...Bai..." He whispered as his lips quivered. Did he found out?!

He was scared of being hated. So scared... He just... He just wanted to love him before letting go... He really was gonna let go... Even if he was very unwilling!

Tears spilled out of Alexander's eyes, the pain in his heart almost unbearable. It was even harder to breath. "Bai... S-Sorry.... Please... don't hate me.." His voice was almost inaudible. His heart was thumping hard with nervousness, fear and dread. A normal man would feel disgusted being molested at night... "B-bai—"

Alexander couldn't finish his words as Mubai passionately captured his lips.

Mubai kissed him and the world fell away. It was slow and soft, comforting in ways that words would never be. Mubai parted Alexander's lips, eager to devour his everything.

As the kiss deepened, Alexander's lungs hurt even more. He needed to breath before Mubai really would take his life away, not just his heart and breath. So he moaned, trying to stop Mubai from eagerly eating his lips.

Mubai paused before moving his hungry lips to attack Alexander's neck, nibbled and licked his ears and down to ravage his collarbone. Mubai was feeling the intense elation of finally getting what his heart desired.

His hand swiftly pulled down Alexander's pants much to the latter's silent protest, and his manhood was soon engulfed by a fiery hand that rubbed and stroked him to nth heaven. Mubai was cleverly good at handjob even though it was his first time servicing someone beside himself. He hissed into Alexander's ear as his hand continued to pleasure him.

"Alex... Please don't move, I want to make you happy too."

After which, Mubia removed his restrain and cocked his head over Alexander's huge throbbing manhood. Mubai wrapped Alexander's manhood in his mouth, his tongue swirling in a figure eight as saliva made the slip easier and warm to the skin.

Alexander gasped and groaned, his free hands reached out to caress Mubai's head full of ebony hair that were soft to touch. He ruffled through Mubai's hair, making the latter even more eager to suck his manhood. He pulled and Mubai pushed, they danced the passion swirling in their stomach pit, their hearts throbbing with pain as wordless desires stretched in the darkness.

Alexander's back straightened as he felt his release coming. Mubai's sucked Alexander's manhood in and out, deeper and faster until he felt the thick fluid into his throat. There were so much that some leaked out of his mouth but he licked them all clean, not wanting to stain his own bed.

The manhood in Mubai's hand shrunk, its owner feeling happy but bewildered. "I don't know what happened..." He softly whispered in between his gasps, but then soon found himself feel aroused once again at Mubai's touch on his nipples.

He did not realize his shirt was already pulled up and Mubai worked his way into licking one of his nipples in swirling motion. His manhood immediately awoke, springing into action but Mubai was busy with pleasuring Alexander through his nipples that were now erect.

...

That night, Mubai ravaged Alexander until the latter fell asleep. He was then cleaned and dressed by Mubai before putting him in his room, where he was laid carefully in bed and covered properly in his blanket.

Mubai was in thought as he stared at Alexander's peaceful sleeping face, his heart chanting what he needed to do.

Although he had finally found his resolve, the events in his life never went along his desires because his marriage was suddenly held 2 days earlier. Alexander was nowhere to be found right after.