Chapter 5: GAME OVER — READY START

“Aw, crudbuckets.”

Diegi, upon seeing the supposedly-dead tutorial monster alive and well, realizes his fatal mistake.

Oh yeah— I probably should have checked for the whole slowly-dissolving-into-light effect that happens when monsters die in MYTH…

Giving only a halfhearted attempt to run, Diegi turns around and takes a step, only to find that he feels a lot lighter all of a sudden.

He tries to move his arms or legs, but he can’t. He can’t feel them either— in fact, all he can feel is the odd sensation of wind rushing around his head and the bottom of his neck. His view of the world rotates rapidly, and he eventually catches sight of his own body, crumpling to the ground. Except, it’s missing a head. And— a major chunk between its legs? Was that really necessary!? Standing behind Diegi’s collapsing body is the forever expressionless tutorial monster, next to the fallen fruit tree that Diegi hadn’t been able to taste the fruit of even once. And even further behind the tree is Gloria with tears streaming from her eyes.

Oh, so that’s it. The monster must have beheaded me. Damn, that was not a clean cut— I feel bad for whoever has to clean up all the blood and guts. Wait, no, what the hell am I talking about!? No one’s gonna clean that up— I’m dying!

And die he does. For what feels like the umpteenth time in a single day, his vision once again slowly fades to black, and his thoughts go silent before he can even feel the *thunk* of his head hitting the ground.

----------------------------------------

#

Diegi wakes up in a familiar blue void, sitting on a familiar white plastic chair. It’s the place where he spoke with Automoderator for the first time.

I guess the AI wants to have a few choice words with me before I pass on…

Even thinking about how he died makes him feel depressed. What a lame way to go out.

“I didn’t even make it through the Paxdom Fields… never even got to see the city of Paxdom, even from a distance. I bet it would look really cool to see it with my own eyes…”

So lame. There had been so many things he’d wanted to do before he died. Play more MYTH. Get a girlfriend. Top the leaderboards of MYTH. Beat 100 VR Pros in— okay, maybe he hadn’t had too many things he wanted to do before he died. Dying still sucked, though. Diegi hangs his head in disgrace, not saying anything more until a familiar disembodied voice speaks up.

“Yeah?”

He doesn’t even react to Automoderator’s sudden appearance, aside from giving a one-word response.

“Yeah.”

“Yeah.”

“Nah. Wait, actually— I do have a few.”

Diegi sits up in his chair, temporarily regaining some of the light in his eyes.

“What was up with me having such abysmal attributes and stats? Is it really fair to kill me here when I was playing with such a shitty handicap? I didn’t even get a starter weapon or anything!”

“Yeah, well you could have at least fixed my avatar after I’d already left! Y’know, make it so I don’t almost die from getting scratched by a tree? You’re supposed to have total control over this place, right!?”

<...>

“Ah, whatever. Go ahead, kill me.”

Diegi leans back in his chair, waiting for the nothingness of death to hit. Or, the whatever-happens-to-you-after-you-die-in-a-video-game-world-iness. He even closes his eyes. But, no matter how long he waits, nothing happens. Eventually, Automoderator speaks up again.

“Eh?”

“The hell? What does that matter to me now? I’m dead!”

“Well, I don’t. Stop stalling and just get rid of me already!”

Another pause. Time stretches on, and on, and on… Diegi starts counting sheep in his head, just to give himself something to do. Time stretches on, seconds into minutes into what feels like hours. Until—

Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.

“Huh? I don’t think I’ve ever heard you swear before. What’s wrong, widdle baby Automod can’t handle a little—”

“Eh? In the middle of the tutorial, I think.”

Even without being able to see Automod’s face (do AI have a face?), Diegi can just feel the sheer panic and anger emanating from the digital overlord’s voice. It’s a total loss of composure compared to the bot’s normal haughty demeanor.

“Is that a problem or something?”

<…>

“Hellooooo??”

<...I’m sending you back.>

“Huh!?”

Upon hearing this, Diegi sits straight up in his chair. A hopeful expression blossoms on his face, replacing his previously depressed and angsty demeanor. Sending him back? Where— to the real world? Back with his mother? Does that mean he won’t have to die after all?

Diegi’s hopes are dashed in an instant, and he slumps back in his cheap plastic chair. Why was he hinging his hopes on a pseudo-deity who couldn’t even afford leather seats, anyway?

“Well, it’s better than dying forever, but why? I thought you said no respawns?”

“Well, at least fix my attributes and stats before you send me back! Oh, and bump my Overall Level up a few notches too!”

“What the hell? I thought this was YOUR WORLD!?”

What had started as a somewhat civil and self-reflective conversation quickly devolves into a screaming match between man and superpowered machine.

“SO HOW DO I MAKE IT TO PAXDOM ALIVE WHEN I CAN’T EVEN RUN A FEW PACES WITHOUT GETTING TIRED!?”

“Again… How do you expect me to get there when I’m as weak as this? Answer the question, stupid bot!”

“WHY SHOULD I— oh, I’m back.”

A totally indignant Diegi begins to form a response only for his vision to *shift* in the middle of his sentence. The blue void warps in the span of an instant, quickly turning into the familiar Starter’s Hut, and the white plastic chair that Diegi was sitting on is replaced by a wooden rocking chair. Unlike the first time Diegi arrived, however, there aren’t any blue screens for him to set up his avatar with. It looks like he’s truly stuck with his rather crappy current build.

Hmmph. Well, no point in sticking around. But if that AI thinks he can dodge my questions forever, he’s got another thing coming. Moving on from that, though…

“…What a day! I mean, I really thought I was dead when I got beheaded there. Good thing I spent so long on the tutorial, I guess.”

“AAAHH!! Come on, stop doing that! Give a warning or something before you just start speaking whenever you want!”

Diegi jumps a little in his seat, a little surprised to hear Automoderator’s voice again so soon after being transported from the blue void. To his credit, however, he doesn’t start running in circles this time.

“Do I have a choice? Oh, actually— there’s a lot I need to know about this world and how to relates the original MYTH game. If you’re going to tag along, could you at least answer some questions?”

“This has gotta be child abuse or something… fine, I’ll do it. I’ll play your game. But I’ll do it my way.”

Muttering to himself as he gets out of the rocking chair, Diegi walks over to the door of the hut and violently throws it open, already weary of adventuring in this world. He’d always wished he could see the world of his favorite MMORPG game in real life, but if he’d known it was gonna be like this…!

This whole reincarnation thing is gonna ruin my love for MYTH, won’t it?

Thinking such negative thoughts, he gingerly takes a step outside, returning to the Paxdom fields. He’d already hit the limit of how far he could go as an ordinary guy— a regular player. He’d died after what, an hour or two? But he hasn’t even begun showing how far he could go as himself— a grade-A troll, a glitch exploiter, and a general scumbag. So maybe it’s time to take back those words he’d uttered about changing his ways. Hello world: Trolegi has arrived.

----------------------------------------

##

It’s been around fifteen minutes now. Upon exiting the Starter’s Hut, Diegi had looked ahead of him, at the southward branch of the “tutorial path,” ready to resume his journey to Paxdom and make a big impact on the world of MYTH. This time, he’d be a hero. This time, he’d fulfill his destiny. Carrying these resolutions in his heart, he’d taken a big step— north.

Yes, he was walking directly away from Paxdom.

“Mmm?”

“Yeah, I know.”

Humming leisurely as he walks, Diegi continues to intentionally deviate from the tutorial’s designated route until he comes up against an invisible wall. Stumbling backwards, he rubs the tip of his nose that had just been slightly squashed.

“Ow! I mean— Yeah! I found it!”

Squinting his eyes and looking forward carefully, Diegi spots a strange blue shimmer in the air. It’s the barrier that MYTH uses to keep new players from straying too far from the designated route.

Since I started as a human, this barrier should extend in a dome around Paxdom… right?

“I said it before: from now on, I’m playing my way. If you’re gonna saddle me with shit-tier stats, then I’ll do whatever it takes to advance.”

Diegi ignores the nagging voice and continues to inspect the barrier. Throwing out his arm, then his leg, he confirms that he can’t pass it no matter what he does. And every time he makes impact, a low musical note akin to a buzz rings through the air. It’s distinctly digital in nature— not a sound you’d expect from the world of MYTH. Smiling at his discovery of the “tutorial barrier” used to keep new players in line, Diegi tosses a sentence at Automod.

“So, you said that even you have to follow some rules of the game. And since this game-world is basically MYTH Infinite Fantasy’s world, all I have to do to complete the tutorial is register at Paxdom’s guild hall. No matter how much instruction I skip to do it.”

“Oh, yeah. This is gonna be fun.”

Without giving a subsequent response, Diegi turns directly to his left, steps off of the path, and— keeping one arm against the transparent barrier— begins to lightly run.

----------------------------------------

###

As Diegi approaches his intended location while still sliding against the barrier, a game notification appears.

[ Agility Level Increased! ]

“That’s the second time now! All I need to increase my Agility attribute level is a bit of running, huh? Seems too easy. Oh… I guess that it’s easier to boost attributes when they’re still small, though.”

And my attributes aren’t just small right now. They’re practically nonexistent. If only I had something to compensate…

“Hey— Automod, if you can’t mess with my stats or attributes, how about giving me an OP skill or something? Isn’t that a game-world reincarnation industry standard?”

Diegi waits and braces himself for the echoing voice to fill his head, but encounters nothing but his own thoughts instead.

“Hello…? Automod? You there?”

Hmm. I guess the AI got bored or something.

Diegi spares a few moments for thought and then begins to slow as he approaches his target. He wasn’t sure if the locations of stationary mobs would be the same in this simulated world as they were in MYTH, but it seems that he’s lucked out— just on the other side of the barrier, sitting on a patch of lush green grass, is the hidden menace of the Paxdom Fields: a Man-Eater Banana monster.

It’s around 30% ‘planted’ into the ground vertically, colored bright orange with yellow stripes, and has a vine twisting from the top of its stem to the ground. You’d never guess that it was a monster and not just a regular plant formation object, but that was intentional— many a MYTH newbie had been suddenly engaged in battle by one of these plants, often dying without having the chance to figure out what was even attacking them. In reality, it was the mouth full of sharp teeth that resides on the bottom of the plant, kept hidden by being buried.

The thought of such a game mechanic being purposefully added makes Diegi laugh softly.

“Heh heh… a living, fighting, ambushing Banana. Hell, it’s basically an in-game troll. Even the developers have a sense of humor. Much more fun than Automod, anyways.”

Diegi, at Level 0 and with a functionally crippled avatar, had no chance of defeating the man-eater banana. It attacks in a strange way: The plant turns over and exposes its mouth, after which several vines shoot out to either ensnare the player or deal flailing damage. The vines’ binding attacks were programmed hilariously badly— they were slow, the sound the game played for them was awful (like a crinkling bag of chips), and they often displaced players on impact instead of properly grabbing them— but an Agility level of 2 isn’t fast enough to dodge the more formidable flailing attacks.

“Hmm… yup, I can’t touch it. The Man-Eater’s on the other side of the barrier, after all.”

Thankfully, regardless of his attribute levels or physical positioning, he won’t need to defeat the monster for his plan to work. Indeed, Diegi can’t even get close enough to the plant to deal damage to it. It’s right there— only a meter or two away— but the indestructible blue wall separates him from the body of the Man-Eater Banana.

Pressing his palm against the transparent barrier, Diegi simply stops and stares for a moment, expressionlessly observing the sleeping Man-Eater on the other side. Then his face splits into a wide smile.

“Okay, here I go— start the timer, cause I’m getting to Paxdom in less than ten minutes.”

Not the most reassuring words, considering his previous track record. That makes, what, two cocky time-related one liners in the span of a single day. But hey, who’s counting…?