Novels2Search
Theomancer
CH67: Early Delivery

CH67: Early Delivery

With a generally unchanged travel plan and a new pouting addition to our [Party], we finally left Merglobth’s study, and made our way back to our mansion.

“I still don’t understand why you both were so adamantly against escorting other people”, Undine grumpily remarked.

“Because, most of the time, they’re incapable of protecting themselves or meaningfully assisting an adventuring group, and I don’t want the blood of some dead weight on my hands when we fail to cover for every one of their deficiencies”, Sheeno explained, maybe a bit too cynically than I would have liked.

“Yeah, but also because I don’t want to travel with someone that will maintain a speed that sits between our walking and running ones, making it unbearably frustrating to follow”, I remarked, getting two confused looks in return, to my great satisfaction.

“…Darwin, love, I have no idea what you’re talking about”, my girlfriend eventually replied.

“Don’t worry, he lost me too”, the [High Priestess] petted her on the shoulder in a conciliatory manner.

“It doesn’t really matter…” I shrugged, noncommittedly.

We teleported back home in short order and then showed Undine to the guest room, where she promptly unloaded some of her stuff from the spatial bangle on her arm, and then we reconvened all together in the living room.

“So, you both have your version of spatial pouches, making organizing our bags for the expedition a moot point, except maybe for some extra essential that I’ll bring in my shoulder bag…” I let the discourse end with an open sentence to see if anyone had anything to add.

Obviously, after we had re-decided on what [Quests] to take, it was time to further talk about our travel plans.

“You still have the automatically refilling bottle I gave you at the [Temple]?” Undine asked, fully expecting me to answer in the affirmative.

“Yes, together with the [Artifact] you gave me to always find my way home”, I reply, bringing the [Guide to the Hearth] out of my pocket to show it to her.

I never went anywhere without it: You never know when you’ll be randomly teleported away.

And if someone believes me paranoid for thinking like that: Must I remind that someone that it has already happened?

Yeah, didn’t think so.

“Good. I would have been extremely disappointed if you had lost either of them. Still, some rope, mundane source of light, and miscellaneous potions can be useful for when you’re out of [Mana]”, the Nymph continued.

To which Sheeno nodded and added “All good ideas, but I’m pretty sure you already have all of that in that ‘adventuring kit’ you put together”.

“Well, I didn’t put it together, it’s a mix of stuff that the [Temple] and the [Guild] I trained at gave me, which I thought could be useful to have out on the field”, I downplayed my part, because, to be fair, there was little decision on my part beside dividing my stuff into what could be useful to have on me, and what added too much bulk that I could be bothered with.

“You know that all you have to do is ask and I’ll buy a spatial pouch for you too, right?” Sheeno asked while gently poking me on the side with one of her fingers.

“I know, but I don’t need it, really! We now have a total of two team-mates with them, so I’m fine with the non-magical bag, which is actually useful in case we encounter a zone with some kind of anti-magic effect or that otherwise disables access to spatial bags”, I swatted her prodding digits away.

“On paper your reasoning is sound, but you do realize that the situation you spoke of is practically unheard of, right?” the [High Priestess] asked for clarification, clearly making the situation worse.

“And now that you’ve said that I’m sure that we’ll find ourselves in such a situation”, I responded with a grimace.

“What? Why?” She asked, even more confused.

“He’s the [Protegee] of the [Goddess of Luck], and as I understand it she practically finds pleasure in inconveniencing him by assuring improbable odds in his future, especially when such odds have been touched upon around him, and even more so when they have described as ‘improbable’ or ‘rare’, giving it all a prophetical feeling“, Sheeno explained in length what she apparently understood from the bits and pieces I let slip from time to time.

“Oh… I guess it does make sense, once one thinks about it…” Undine mutter to herself.

“Yeah, so, from now on, avoid saying things like ‘how could it get any worse’, ‘at least now it’s over’ or ‘the worst has passed’, or ‘whatever could happen next’”, I instructed the Nymph, but clearly talking also to the only other person in the room.

So I was surprised when I [Detect]ed someone purposely walking to our house at such speed that I could barely turn my head before our interphone rang with a now familiar bell-like sound.

“Darwin? Another long lost friend of yours?” Sheeno sardonically stated while getting up.

“Even though it’s depressing when said out loud, I don’t think I have other friends alive”, I said out loud while scratching the back of my head.

Good thing that enhanced [Body Stats] completely remove dandruff and other minor inconveniences, because I’ve been scratching my head a lot lately.

“What about the [Depth Witch]?” She asked when I made my way to her and the door.

“Merga? I see her more as a mentor of sorts, but I guess our relationship is friendly enough…”, I quickly amended after I bit of thought.

“But is it her outside?” My girlfriend more pointedly asked.

“Ah, no. I have no idea of who it is”, I just shrugged, which caused both Sheeno and Undine to snort.

So the pale Amazon just decided to open the door and shout “Who is it?!”

“A courier from the Twin Seamstresses, Ma’am, to tell you that the last part of your order will be completed by tomorrow morning!” An upitty dressed man with feline features responded from outside our gates.

“Uh, that was unexpectedly quick”, Sheeno quietly said to me, before returning to shout at the courier, “Thank you, we will definitely be there before lunch!”

“I will relay your response, Ma’am. Now, if you’ll excuse me I’ll go ahead and do just that!” And before she could utter a simple ‘may our paths cross again’ he was already gone and replaced by a cloud of dust that showed how he run past the teleportation station and decided to reach the market on foot.

Understandable if he could maintain such speeds.

“Man, who lighted a fire under his ass? He came and went so fast that I didn’t [Inspect] him: I bet he even had a stupidly funny sounding [Class] with how fast he was able to go”

“He was a courier, instead of a [Courier], so he could have been a retired [Adventurer] that accepts small [Quests] in exchange for favors or rare items, and I’m sure that his speed is mostly born by a high [Level] combined with skewed [Statistics] and specialized [Skills] and [Spells], maybe even [Abilities]”, the four-armed companion next to me explained for my benefit.

“So, what you’re saying is that he made his build with the idea being that he had to ‘gotta go fast’?” I just had to make a joke about it.

“Ok, that has to be a reference to something from your world: You even sang something along those lines when we were riding your monstrosity!” Sheeno turned around to face me, stopping us from going back to our sofa.

“I don’t know, is it?” I asked with a shit-eating grin.

“Äss”, Sheeno deadpanned while staring into my eyes.

Unauthorized use: this story is on Amazon without permission from the author. Report any sightings.

“You two are actually incredibly cute together”, Undine squealed while observing our antics.

A nervous tick made my left eyelid twitch a little, but I reined in the rude retort.

“This is not Earth: They already made it clear enough that [Nexus] doesn’t hold the same idea on body standards that we did.”

“How was that cute!? We were bickering, the exact thing you were previously worrying over!” Asked a consternated [Heliokan].

“Aw, but I didn’t know it was on this level: That only shows how much you love each other!” The [High Priestess] fawned over us, managing to make both of us blush with her bluntness.

That earned us a moment of awkwardness when neither I nor Sheeno knew where to look.

I really hope that my new physical vessel is incapable of barfing.

Which of course meant that [Buddy] had to intrude and ruin it.

At least it helped in snapping me out of it, which I think was the original intention, and the rest of the day went blissfully uneventful.

Except for when Undine bluntly asked about our bedroom insulation, and Sheeno proudly declared that she would willfully test them that very instant.

Which meant it was time for me to get my god-damned reward.

* * *

[Humans] do it wrong, because holyfuckingshit!

Anyway, new day, new me, and for how sore I felt that might actually be more true than for most.

“I still don’t understand why you aren’t just using your restoration [Spell], instead of needlessly limping around”, my girlfriend repeated for the nth time that morning, embarrassed from watching me awkwardly hop around the kitchen while cooking, knowing damn well that she was the cause behind my condition.

“It’s a badge of honor woman!-ow. And it’s a [Skill], so it’s already working passively to stave off the worst of it-ow”, I responded, wincing at almost every step I took.

Because yes, me finding a way to use my [Skills] passively early on wasn’t that great of an achievement, since that was apparently how most [Skills] are meant to be used when constructed properly.

Mine really weren’t, but it wasn’t anything that a slight subconscious use of [Modify] couldn’t fix.

Speaking about the stuff that I do subconsciously: There was too much of it.

I don’t know when, but I somehow went from completely blocking the [System] from helping me, in fear that it would ‘help’ me in unexpected ways, to not only allowing it to take care of the more mundane stuff on its own, trusting that [Buddy] would take care of it, but continuing my growth in my chosen path by only trusting and doing what felt right, while leaving everything else that was even the least bothersome to the [System].

You know, there was nothing wrong in saying that you were just becoming more reliant on me, instead of getting worried that there was something wrong with your change of heart.

“Sorry! You’re right.”

And I was being honest, because thinking about it, I only started relying on the [System] only after I acknowledged that [Buddy] wouldn’t screw me over.

Was it healthy of me to move forward like this? Probably not, but it definitely beats how I was at the beginning, so I’ll call a step forward in the right direction and try to keep on improving.

“Good morning!” A cheery Undine entered the kitchen.

“ ‘Morning.”

“Bonjour.”

“I’m pleased to say that, outside of a few thumps, I didn’t hear anything!” She just as cheerily as before exclaimed, causing Sheeno to grin at herself and me to miss a step, worsening the pain coming from my pelvis.

Thankfully we weren’t already eating, so I didn’t also choke on something, but what the hell!?

“Since when are you so blunt!?” I asked the unashamed [High Priestess], and the desperation in my voice must have broken my girlfriend, who started uproariously laughing.

“What? What did I say?” Undine either was a really good actress, or she was completely oblivious to matters of love and passion, and from what I knew about her, it could be both.

* * *

“This is unexpectedly lively”, Undine stated while we walked down the main road of the shopping district.

“It might be the [Wild Area], but most merchants know that it’s where there are [Adventurers] that real money flows, and since this place is normally filled with veterans with deep pockets the best crafters not employed already by some [King] are all here, which ends up creating a veritably bustling economy”, Sheeno replied, probably speaking from experience.

“Interesting…” The Nymph responded distractedly, without ever stopping looking around, but it was obvious that she did still hear everything that had been said by how she tried to peek harder at the faces of those that had open workshops, probably to see if she were able to recognize any famous face.

Not that I would know anything about it: I was here to get my newly improved cloak, new armor, and some change of clothes, so that I stopped resembling a cartoon character who only ever dressed in the same outfit.

After a few minutes, we finally arrived at the ‘Twin Hags’, which apparently was the name of the shop where the two elderly sister combo of [Seamstress] and [Leatherworker] resided.

“Did they change the name after they became old, or is there something that I’m missing?”

None of us had time to even touch the door before it slammed open and two disheveled faces, with worryingly crazy eyes, rushed out to meet us.

“Give us the boy!”

“He must answer some question!”

“Because that cloak-!”

“That damned cloak!”

“Give him to us!”

“Give!”

The two elderly cat ladies started grabbing me as soon as they were out, and immediately began pulling me inside the shop.

“Woah woah woah! Hands off- Sheeno, help!” I was originally surprised, and not perceiving hostile intention I didn’t stop them at the start of whatever this was, but I soon realized my mistake when I took notice that they were much stronger than I originally thought, making it impossible to resist them with my measly [Body].

Name:

Flavinia Cougar

Class:

Witchy Seamstress (Lvl 67)

Sub-Class:

Twinned crafter

Job:

Seamstress

Proficiency:

96%

Race:

Feline Kebunu

Status:

Manic; Resolute

Name:

Lavinia Cougar

Class:

Witchy Leatherworker (Lvl 67)

Sub-Class:

Twinned crafter

Job:

Leatherworker

Proficiency:

96%

Race:

Feline Kebunu

Status:

Manic; Resolute

“Holy shit these ladies are strong strong!”

“Have fun in there! I and Undine will go and have some girl time on our own while you do your thing!” Sheeno betrayed me in a happy tone, waving cutely at my struggling form.

“Traitor!” I shouted after her, just as the hags had finished dragging me inside the shop, prompting them to close the door behind me.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s true that they were strong but they definitely made sure not to exert enough force to hurt me, and that is the only reason I managed to resist for so long and for why I allowed this to happen at all.

It was just theatrics, unlike what waited for me behind that closed door.