“How could you be so irresponsible!? From Mr. Dulcet I could understand it- “
“Hey!” I exclaimed, but my protests seemingly fell on deaf ears.
“-since he’s new to this society in general, but from you, dear Fyratta, I honestly expected better!” Merglobth repeated again, once in the privacy of their office, more animatedly than when they did in public, but thankfully this time they were also more concise about it.
And the weird ‘monkey-man’ wasn’t there to intensely glare at us either.
“Merglobth, it was literally a newly devised [Spell] and we had no idea it would be both so fast, and fear-mongering. But you’re right, we should have stopped after testing it and sent you a message way before we were actually forced to do so”, Sheeno explained again.
“Then why didn’t you!?” The writhing mass of tentacles asked exasperated.
“I was having too much fun?” Sheeno responded, seemingly unsure of her own thoughts.
“Wuh- Is that a question, or your actual answer!?” It seemed like Merglobth was at their wits’ end.
“I believe both”, my companion nodded after pondering on her infuriating answer.
During all of this I was seated next to Sheeno, facing our ‘handler’, twiddling my thumbs, but they had seemingly forgotten about my presence and I was starting to regret not having a bucket of pop-corns to summon into being.
And now you know how I feel.
“Uff…” Merglobth looked like they were literally deflating in an effort to calm themselves down, “dear, what is wrong? You never acted like this. Are you lashing out? Is this what it is?” But the moment they said the words they realized just how inappropriate they were.
I mean, even I could tell, and that is saying something.
Sheeno stiffened at the words, and the guilty smile left her face, replaced by cold fury… pun not intended, but hey!
“Lashing out? Lashing OUT!? I have been [Banished] from my homeland, and you think this bout of irresponsibility is me ‘lashing out’!? No Merglobth, I have just been having a fucking great time with Darwin, and for the first time in months I finally got distracted and relaxed!” She blew up in their… face?
“I’m sorry, it was inconsiderate of me to say-“ Merglobth tried apologizing, but was interrupted by Sheeno starting her rant again.
“No! Don’t ‘I’m sorry’ me, you could have contacted us first, to warn us of the danger in the area, and all this mess could have been fixed way before it got out of hand. But did you? No! Because you either didn’t trust us with dealing with it or were being overprotective as a favor to my parents!”
“Yes, you’re right, this is also partially my fault: I should have contacted you first, since you should have been the assigned [Adventurers] in the general area the ‘creature’ was spotted anyway; and I should have taught at least the basic ‘dos’ and ‘don’ts’ to both of you before sending you out.
But you must admit that you can’t throw the blame solely on me, dear, as you two are the ones still clearly in the wrong here: The reason you went out with less information than one normally would be because you were both pushing for an ‘adventure’, and how could you not think about the consequences of running around at those speeds in a metallic beast the size of a dozen men? We thought we had an over-[Level 50 Demon] on our hands, for goodness sake!
No, in here, in this room, everyone is a loser: you’ll both be punished accordingly, and even I won’t get out of this with only a slap on the wrist, I promise.”
I did not like the choice of words they used, but I could find no lies within the discourse, so I could only nod at the end. Sheeno, on the other hand, seemed ready to fight their ‘eldritchicity’, so I grabbed one of her hands in my own and squeezed it lightly.
Sheeno gave a little jolt and turned to me, and I gave her a very subtle shake of the head in response to her unasked question.
She still looked like she wanted to fight Merglobth’s statement, but she seemed to follow my lead and accept their words.
“Also, this mess was such a big thing, that the [Guild Master] came out of his secluded cultivation to offer his assistance if necessary, so it being a false alarm rattled his jimmies like you wouldn't believe”, they continued.
“The [Guild Master] was there?” I asked.
A couple of eyes from within the mass of tentacles finally landed on me, acknowledging that I was still there.
“Yes, you might have noticed a cranky [Simian Kebunu] sending glares your way, specifically to you Mr. Dulcet. That was him, and he wasn’t pleased with having his private time interrupted”, Merglobth explained.
“Yikes, monkey-man angry.”
That sounded kind of racist.
“…yeah, maybe it was insensitive of me to react like that.”
I hated when [Buddy] successfully made me feel bad when I was acting like an asshole, but since it only helped in making me less of one I could only accept it with grace…
This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.
And by that I mean that I was loudly thinking about very improper noises, probably causing even my [Patron] to pay attention somewhere else, at least for a while. Seeing as she didn’t comment on it, it meant that the strategy may have really worked, and I could reuse it in the future, whenever I wanted a bit of privacy.
Or I’m just paranoid and she isn’t checking on me 24/7.
“We’ll personally apologize to the man if he’s still in the building… but what do you mean by ‘he came back from his secluded cultivation’? I thought this was an ‘RPG world’, not a xianxia one”, to say that I was confused at the mention of the existence of multiple ‘trope systems’ at the same time wouldn’t be an exaggeration.
“I don’t know half the word you just used-“, Merglobth sounded even more confused than me after my last statement.
“Don’t worry, you get used to it”, Sheeno interrupted them by muttering a comment.
“-but I meant what I said: The [Guild Master] has a [Cultivator Sub-Class], and he was meditating alone in a room rich of natural [Mana], absorbing it to strengthen himself”, they finally clarified.
“Ooh, a [Sub-Class]: anyway in which I could get either of you to tell me more about how they work?” I was excited at the prospect of knowing more ways in which I could grow stronger, even though it may not be in the immediate future.
“Now, now, let’s not change the subject too much-“, Merglobth tried to not let the conversation get derailed.
“We can’t tell you much, but it’s the reason I encouraged you to discover all your [Statistics] on your own before [Level 10]”, but Sheeno didn’t care about our handler’s intentions, so she barreled through with enough hints to make it obvious for me.
“Nice”, I concluded.
“Mph, fine, have it your way. Then let’s discuss both your [Quest]’s reward and your punishment for your irresponsibility…”, Merglobth sounded miffed.
“Less nice”, was all I felt I needed to say.
* * *
[Brass rank True Adventurer].
Even with all the mess we had caused, I still got enough recognition to advance in my [Job], and a bunch of [Nexus Coins] to go with it.
Speaking about coins, I never really paid much attention to them, since they just seemed to be made of mundane copper, silver, and gold, but inspecting them further than just giving them a light glance I noticed that they did have a very specific, yet faint, [Mana signature], probably used to distinguish them from eventual forges; said ‘signature’ was also the only way to distinguish the provenance of the coins for certain. Without having to rely upon the nonsensical designs pressed into them (which idiot decided that they would use a tree as their signature!? It could literally apply to dozens of races!).
“You two, with me!” Someone shouted from in front of us.
We had barely left Merglobth’s study behind, intending to go and eat something at the cafeteria, when the furious monkey-man appeared in front of us. And I don’t mean that I didn’t notice him until we were particularly close, I had my [Unavoidable Detection] active with a small stream of [Mana] as usual, but this guy must have either teleported this close to us, or he was just that damn fast.
The worst part was that he was our current [Guild Leader], Rubicon Riverfist, probably the angriest person with us at the moment.
I and Sheeno looked at each other, and it was clear that neither of us was in the mood to refuse the order from the clearly massively powerful superior. His power was so palpable that his mere presence shut us both up.
But apparently, we weren’t the only people there.
“Now, now, [Guild Master], their situation has already been dealt with both publicly and privately by their handler, there is no reason-“ Merglobth had come to our rescue, slithering out of his door after us, but was brusquely interrupted.
“Shut up, Merglobth; another word, and I’m declassing you to [Receptionist]; and yes, I’m that pissed!” The monkey-man exclaimed, swirling around to face the mass of tentacles so fast that I felt buffeted by the generated winds.
“Bu-“
Merglobth didn’t have the time to even finish that single word, because the [Guild Master] was suddenly in front of them, having somehow gotten around us, even though the corridor was barely wide enough for me and Sheeno to walk shoulder to shoulder… well, more like ‘shoulder to abdomen’, but whatever.
“C’mon, I dare you to test what I just said”, he literally growled out.
Merglobth visibly shrank down, before reluctantly slithering away. Once they closed the door to their office, the [Guild Master] reappeared to our backs, waited for us to turn around, and then said to follow him once more, only this time he did so solely with a glare and a nod in the direction we were meant to go.
We readily followed, and quickly got to a ramp of stairs, which we run up for way too long, or at least I thought so personally, and when we got to the very top of the staircase we arrived at a narrow corridor with a massive steel door on the other end, and a decently sized wooden desk in front of it, where a ‘mousy’ looking elderly lady sat at.
Like, literally mousy, in the sense that she had big round ears, whiskers, and a thin, naked tail behind her.
“Doris, I’m going in with the most recent troublemakers. I am to not be disturbed until I come out to say so”, he stated once we got closer.
“Of course sir”, she simply responded.
He kept on heading for the door, and that giant thing silently swung on its own once he got close enough, allowing passage for all three of us and then shutting close when we were all through.
Only then I really looked at the room inside, and it wasn’t what I was expecting: to begin with, there was very little light, barely enough to see without having to squint; then came the [ambient Mana], which was strangely clean, even more than those dedicated rooms Merglobth had shown us; and then came the fact that every surface was covered either by lush furry pelts or ornate carpets, with cushions strewn just about all over the place, except for a small corner of the room that had a small pool of clear running water.
“Is this where he goes in ‘secluded cultivation’? because you can add a bunch of books and this place becomes perfect!”
Once more, he moved at an imperceptible speed, so fast that even my [Precognitive Aura] failed to warn me in time when he suddenly had his hairy mitts on my shoulders, squeezing almost painfully hard on them.
“You have done a very stupid thing… but you’re young, new to the [Job], and to the [Nexus] too to boot, so I’ll cut you some slack”, he said in a tone that was surprisingly forthcoming and accommodating, “that still doesn’t mean that you’ll be able to get off scot-free here, just that it won’t be too painful for either of us”, the [Guild Master] finished.
Once again, I was hit by how differently people in high positions behaved privately and when in the public’s eye.
“This is the same situation as with Abaan, all over again.”
“Sir, if I may?” Sheeno asked in an unusually meek tone.
He gave her a scrutinizing look, but then simply reappeared in the middle of the room, already sat down on a carpet, and with a hand extended in front of himself as if to tell us to sit.
Sheeno and I shared another meaningful look, before complying with the unsaid request.
“It sounds like you have already decided on how to proceed, and it will mostly be focused on punishing Darwin, but you have failed to mention me in any regard…” she tried to lead the conversation.
“Your punishment is easy: Banned from adventuring for two weeks. Pretty standard for this type of mess, although there would have normally been a monetary fine to accompany it, but I doubt it would have any meaningful impact, given the size of your coffers”, the Simian explained.
That was good news, as far as punishment went it sounded pretty light, but for some reason, Sheeno didn’t look relieved in the slightest.
“But if I’m the one getting banned… what about my companion?” And then it hit me: Sheeno was getting punished with what the main culprit, ergo me, would have normally suffered.
What fresh hell did that leave me with!?
“About that…” and with that, the [Guild Master] threw me a look that set off a bunch of warning bells.