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Information about Thirn

About the Kingdom of Thirn. It is a feudal state with two major cities Steenq and Inaard. It used to be considerably larger before the War of the Whorehouse(Yes officially called such because war was declared in a whorehouse over who had precedence to both the throne of Thirn and the “3 hole”of the whore in contention by virtue of his or her kingship.) After the winner had been proclaimed the 2nd War of The Whorehouse was fought 2 years later this time for the reason of who had first rights to have his “3hole” violated by a whore named Bagingo Face Laroo . The whore impaled both of them so badly with (insert correct pronoun here) penis that both had bled out in minutes. The succession was inconclusive erupting into yet another war. More territory was lost both to the Empire and to the goblinoid hordes. A queen was crowned because she found the royal chamberpot that bore a strikingly similar likeness to her own. She married an old despot that thought removing all the hairs one by one from someone's body was appropriate after dinner entertainment. He died from sepsis, which was brought on from the ingestion of hair.The current Lord of Inaard is the de facto ruler of the kingdom. His ancestor had married into the last house that ruled the kingdom. After the Empiric Wars that lasted 30 years it was decided that the current lord would hold a chair in stewardship until a moot of the continent could be held to proclaim his legitimacy. To keep the tenuous peace both at home and abroad he has not called forth the moot. Inaard is the capital city. Home of slaughter houses, stock yards, a sizeable indoor marketplace for all manner of meat products. Its magicians are mostly tied up in preventing the spoilage of meat. Ice mages are in the majority. Technology level would be comparable to our late medieval Employment rates are fluctuating. Dependent mainly upon the stock that is brought in. As such many dwellers have multiple trades almost all have worked in the meat industry, involved with city, county, and country infastructure. Roads are excellent in the Kingdom. Trade is Bandits are few because the syndicates in charge of crime in the cities as well as the scattered local “Condotta”( Men who are associates of the syndicates in the countryside and villages) generally either recruit the would be bandits into the fold or else find them a job then get a small kickback for finding the men jobs. Steenq the major port of the kingdom. It trades abroad mainly with the Empire to the south and Boombasa past the northern wastes.

Steenq much like the capital has a fluctuating labor force that is dependent upon the seasons for both work and size available. All residents are both men of the horse and sea. Salt production and shipping are main areas of employment. Magic used to preserve meat is rather expensive so salt is still the preferred method in the production of travel rations. It serves as a seasoning of course among other things. Not much of note to be said about Steenq other than it has never been taken by a foreign power and it can influence the whole country economically. Thirn is in a state of alert at all times able to mobilize the whole country through a series of couriers and watch towers within 3 days.

Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

Crime- most crime operates on the principals of avoiding taxes via political manipulation or by laundering(grey) thievery(blue) unlicensed magic(orange) assaults/assassination(red) smuggling(black) kidnapping/extortion/ loansharking(green) a syndicate will be referenced by the color of their primary means of revenue. Square Deal Merchant Consortium are mainly Greymen that do dabble in orange black and very seldom red. Golden Pot are Greenmen with sidelines an equal mix of Red and Black. Rusty Pail are Blackmen that flash Red quite bit with a thin green streak. Although most syndicates will operate in all colors of the Rainbow as the needs arise it is strictly professional courtesy to allow specialists to do what they are suited for. Blue is pretty much left up to street level crews looking to move up in the world but all Condotta and Colored Men will be willing to look at stolen goods to turn a quick profit.

Magic is the purview of mages. It is a heavily regulated industry. Copyrights on spells, offensive pre-fabbed magic usually a no go. Such as Eustace's "sawed off fire rod", his light balls and 12 sided quartz explosives.(Article)These items are not meant to reach the general public's hands because of both the expense and danger that could come from the misuse of such items. These goods come one of three ways. Usually failed apprentices or self study's will approach a Colored Man with a proposal protection from other mages in exchange for their incomplete knowledge and abilities in making an Article. Another is to get a mage into debt forcing them to either steal Articles for your organization or make X number for your use. The last is to steal them yourself or to find some in ruins.

Smuggling- stolen goods and those with high tariffs into the cities are prime choices for smuggling. Also people may need to be brought into or out of a city at a moments notice unseen. Not many substances that exist as drugs have been found and labeled dangerous/profitable enough to have their use curtailed tobacco, tea, certain seasonings and herbs,and coffee being exceptions.

Colored Men have a vested interest in keeping the current status quo. i.e. not wanting management to change the government is fat happy lazy and perfectly content to live and let live. Changes in syndicate management are common and usually brutal for both the defeated as well as the victor. Sometimes organizations fall to pieces because of an ill timed coup. Declarations of war amongst syndicates are rare for the previous reason stated. Sometimes they are out in the open and take a long time. At others a knife in the dark on your way home from a dice den.

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-Janus Weaver

Deccanus (Retired) Thirnic Spec Ops

Condotta and Greenman in Forbins