Shock and confusion alone kept my feet on the wooden platform.

I snapped my head back to Nocti, unable to look at Patience for any longer than the spare few seconds I had.

I hate him. I thought, feeling in my bones that it was true. Mothers help me, I think I love him.

Violence ran through my fingers, begging me to turn and wrap them around the man's throat.

He has hurt me. He had the power to hurt me because I love him. I thought, the words feeling wrong in my mind. How could someone I had never met hurt me the way it felt like he had. The anger, the bleeding edge of pain that made my heart hurt and my breath short, it felt so real. The love, the swell of heat that made me want to throw my arms around him and squeeze until he broke into my grasp, felt wrong. Not only because the feeling was not mine, but because it felt warped and twisted in my chest.

“Shall we reset? If you stand here any longer I will take it as an invitation to dance.” Nocti smiled down at me.

Fuck.

While I had been standing there having a mental breakdown, a tavern full of people had been patiently waiting for me to do literally anything. I needed to move, to try and act, but I could not shake the feeling of Patience’s eyes on my back. I knew he was looking at me and he had no idea how I felt about him. He did not know because he did not know me. The hatred and love waging war inside my heart were not mine.

A memory? Had I seen him in a memory before?

“Au-uhm-Trea?” Arthur tapped me on my shoulder from where he stood off the platform.

“Right, right,” I nodded. The feeling of my friend's touch broke me free and I walked backwards from Nocti. I could not risk seeing him again, not while I was the center of everyone’s attention. Making myself giggle, I squeaked out an apology. “Sorry, I think I’ve had a bit too much to drink.”

I dropped back into the ready stance and my opponent mirrored me perfectly, again.

All I needed was two points. Two points more and I could quietly take my leave.

He won’t be distracted this time. If I go for his chest again, he will try and defend that. So when I turn and actually go for his hand, I’ll catch him off guard.

I leaned forward ever so slightly.

Two fingers pressed gently into the middle of my forehead.

The match was over.

Nocti had won without me being able to take a step.

Where they had clapped and cheered for me, they erupted for my opponent's victory.

“Would you call that slow? Perhaps you should reconsider your opinions of me, boy,” Nocti said, his red eyes flickering to where Arthur stood off to the side. Then he focused back on me and spoke in a voice that only I could hear. “To answer your question, You aren’t the only one in this tournament with secrets.”

His eyes flashed from red to yellow just long enough for me to notice. Then, he pulled his fingers from my forehead and bowed.

“Thank you for the bout, I look forward to beating your date in front of you.” He said as he left the platform and rejoined his group of red cloaked underwitchs. They all stood with their back to him and were talking to. . .

“Next match, Arthur versus Patience!” The boy hanging from the back of the bar shouted.

The way the crowd reacted, you would think someone had told each of them that their greatest wish was going to be fulfilled. The excitement that filled the room felt like it would blow the place apart if it continued.

“Hey, are you okay?” Arthur asked me, gently placing his hand on my back.

I looked up at him. His usual smile was gone and had been replaced with the stony expression I had only seen on his face a handful of times. As oblivious as he could seem at times, he had noticed the change in me.

“No,” I whispered, trying to choke down the burning pain I had felt after seeing him again. “I need to go, I’m sorry. Thank you for bringing me here.”

Without giving him the opportunity to say anything, I spun on the heels of my boots and made to leave Seven columns. I couldn’t run, all that would do is draw attention to me. Keeping my eyes on the wooden floor, I walked as quickly as I could without running into people.

I tried, at least.

Just before I made it to the stairs, a pair of shoes stepped into my sight and I ran head first into whoever was wearing them.

“Oh, excuse me. I did not mean to run into you.” A pleasant sounding voice said.

I looked up.

Patience smiled down at me. His hair was short, like it had been shaved clean not very long ago. The features of his face were all sharp and savage, like a hawk or an eagle. His smile was what made him so absolutely stunning. It brought a warm and inviting beauty to his hard features. It felt like a promise, a promise of care and gentleness from someone capable of great violence and brutality.

Patience was a weapon, but his smile was a choice to keep his edges carefully sheathed.

Even still, the sight of him hurt me deeply and tears welled up in my eyes.

“If you ever fight Nocti again, the secret is to not look into his eyes. I wanted to tell you that. It makes my heart feel light when I get to see him lose.” Patience chuckled, his attention making me feel like I was the only person in the world he wanted to talk to.

All I wanted was to feel him hold me in his arms again. We could sit somewhere quiet and he could tell me about what he was studying at the loreiumn. How many evenings had we spent just like that before she came and ruined it all?

“Have I upset you?” Patience asked, his smile fading into a look of concern so genuine that it made me feel like I was the sole soul in all of chaos that he loved.

The tears threatened to spill over my cheeks and I was vaguely aware that others were beginning to look at me.

I met Patience’s eyes again and drove my fist straight into his stomach.

He doubled over with a pained exhale.

A loose spread of sudden sounds of alarm came from the tavern goers that were the closest to us. Before I could be stopped and questioned, I broke for the stairs. Any attempt to remain unnoticed had crumbled to dust the moment I had struck him.

Seven Columns went by in a blur of confused faces and warnings to slow down from the patrons I pushed through. I slipped through the open door and sprinted toward the alley next to where Arthur had bought us food. When I felt that I was far enough out of sight, I threw my back against the wall and took several ragged breaths.

How do I get back to the manor?

Why the fuck did you not pay more attention when you were following Arthur?

You just punched a man you have never met and ran out of Seven Columns like you stole something.

I miss Anna. She could help me if she were here.

The part of me that still felt like me worried that I had forsaken Arthur to a stream of questions that he would not be able to answer. All he had been trying to do was give me an enjoyable night. After he had been nearly killed and taken from his life because of me, it had given me some small amount of peace that he had found something for himself. The guards, playing points, wanting to be a guard, all of it made me feel just a little better about the effect meeting me had placed on him.

I hope he still gets to play. I hope he gets the money he wasted on me back. I hope I haven’t gotten him in trouble with the captain.

All I could do was find my way back to the manor and hope that my friend’s decision to include me would not ruin the rest of his night.

Heavy footsteps echoed down the dark alleyway.

My instincts snapped me into motion and I ran blindly away from the sound.

“Hey!” Someone shouted.

I flinched at the sound. The toe of my right boot scraped against the ground and I lost my balance. My aura flickered to life inside me, but just like when the captain had come at me with a knife, it was too weak to protect me. The moment before my face met the stones, something wrapped around my waist and hauled me back up as if I weighed no more than a feather.

“Is there a reason you fall so much or do you just like doing it?” Arthur asked as he placed me back on my feet gently. His hand lingered on my arm, holding me steady until I could do the same on my own.

“Why are you here,” I panted, still feeling torn on the inside. “What about your match?”

Arthur’s face was serious, but I could see the concern in his eyes. “I forfeit. The real question is why you ran off like that. Did something happen?”

“I’m fine,” I lied. “You should go back and have fun. I’m just gonna go back to the manor.”

Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.

Arthur snorted. “First, you don’t even know where you are. Second, don’t give me that bullshit. I know you're not fine. You can talk to me. You’ve literally seen my guts, remember? Is it something with that thing in your head?”

I had seen his guts. His Mother and his sister had begged me to heal him. He wouldn’t have needed the healing if it was not for me. I had not been able to and yet, there he was, trying to help me. It had probably never crossed his mind that he had nearly died because he had the unfortunate pleasure of meeting me.

“I do not know,” I muttered. “It started with Patience.”

“Have you been waiting for this to happen?” Arthur said, literally scratching his head in confusion.

“No! Patience the person! The man you were supposed to play against. Everytime I heard his name, I started feeling strange. When I actually saw him. . . It was like I was someone else-no, it was like I was feeling someone else’s feelings. It has to be because of a memory or The Well, but I don’t know. I just want to go back to the manor.” I snapped, the words coming out all at once.

“Damn, That’s got to be frustrating,” Arthur sighed and shook his head. “Let’s go then.”

Let’s? As in let us? Is that what he just said?”

“What about the tournament and the guards? You should go back, don’t let me ruin your night.” I muttered, unable to meet his eyes. I felt bad enough that he had forfeited his first match. I couldn’t let myself be the reason he lost the tournament.

“Shut up,” He laughed and started walking down the alley, away from Seven Columns. “You are my night. That was the whole point. How often do we get to hang out without Anna? I can always come back down here tomorrow.”

“Wait, no.” I said, walking quickly to catch up with him.

“No, and yes. There is a bakery around the corner that should still be open. I want to stop there before we head home,” Arthur looked at me through his peripherals when I caught up to him. “Maybe, you should wait for me outside though.”

“Why? Why are you looking at me like that?” I questioned him, noticing the change in his eyes.

As we left the alley, he pointed at the bakery he had spoken of. Its single window was still bright with lantern light. “Because you look like you again. Wait here, I’ll be right back.”

Fuck. I shouted in my mind as I watched him walk away. Sure enough, the shoulders and the front of the red dress I had stolen from Anna’s closest was littered with my iridescent dust.

I did not have the strength or focus necessary to recreate Trea in full, but by the time Arthur returned with a wrapped parcel in his hands, I had managed to darken my hair to a shade somewhere between brown and black. We walked together all the way to the bridge I had crossed to enter the city. He left me with the promise that if I could get back to the manor wall before he did, he would share the contents of the mysterious parcel with me.

The thoughts and feelings that had sparked to life within me once I had laid my eyes on Patience weighed down on me like damp clothes. I felt sore and moist on the inside, like I needed either a cold shower or a full day in the sun to wash or bake myself back into feeling normal.

Sam had not appeared, which meant there had never been any danger of me losing myself to whoever’s memory had been triggered. Mind breaking or not, I was upset at how the night had gone.

The threat of a knife in my skull aside, I had liked Seven Columns. The energy, the drink that Arthur had gotten me, playing points, I had enjoyed it all.

Yet again, the truth that I was Autumn Aubrey had ruined something else. If I had not stolen The Well, regardless of if I remembered doing it or not, there would have been no conflicted feelings for me to feel about Nocti’s brother.

That was what the captain had called him. Is that how they all thought of one another? Who was I to judge them, I had never been one of seven lovers to a sorceress so powerful she had her own sun far underground. I had never had siblings. For fucks sake, I had never had a friend until I met Anna.

Arthur appeared on the top of the manor wall well before I reached it, a giant silhouette against the night sky.

“Looks like I get all the sweets to myself. Shame, I brought us milk too.” Arthur whispered harshly, his voice carrying easily across the rose blanketed hill.

Does he really think he is being quiet? I thought, unable to keep myself from smiling.

I had never had a brother, but if I had, I was pretty sure it would have felt like being around Arthur.

With one hand, the tall man was strong enough to haul me up and set on top of the wall. From there, he jumped down and gently lowered me to the ground with no more effort than it would have taken me to blink.

“Thank you,” I told him, being grateful for once that I was safe behind the manor walls. “For tonight I mean.”

“Save it. The night is not over yet. Come on.” He said and started walking towards the mouth of the garden.

“It is late? What else is there for us to do?” I asked, having to run to catch up to him for the second time that night.

“I don’t sleep anymore, remember? There are all sorts of things to do. Plus,” He said, weaving through the garden path like he knew it by memory. “If you change your hair back, I’ll share the sweets with you.”

Once we were in the garden alcove, Arthur grabbed the parcel from the bakery and two glass bottles of milk from where he had left them on the marble bench.

“You had time to come back here and come all the way back out before you climbed the wall?” I asked him, sitting down beside him on the ground.

“It really wasn’t a fair race. My legs are twice as long as yours,” Arthur opened the parcel and revealed a large stack of some kind of bread. He let me take my pick and handed me a bottle of milk once I did. “I don’t know what these are called either, but they are kind of like jelly filled doughnuts.”

Like the bread wrapped meat and the creamy drink at Seven Columns, one bite of the sweet was enough for me to form an unshakable trust in my friend's taste in food. It was light and airy. When I bit into the middle on my second bite, some kind of filling spurted onto my tongue.

“Which one did you get,” Arthur asked, taking half of his sweet in one single bite. “I got strawberry.”

“Lemon, I think.” I answered through a full mouth.

“Damn. I wanted that one.” Arthur sighed.

With one hand, I held the lemon sweet towards him and took the strawberry one from his fingers with my other. “Here. I want to try both anyway.”

“Yeah, alright.” Arthur agreed with a stupid looking grin on his face.

I crossed my legs and tried the strawberry sweet as I looked around the dark garden. Finding that I liked it so much more than I had the lemon, I finished it quickly and washed it down with the cold milk. When my feasting was over, I wiped my mouth on the back of my hand and began eyeing what was left resting on the unwrapped parcel. “You said there are all sorts of things you have learned to do since you do not sleep anymore, do you have something in mind?”

“Oh, shit, right,” Arthur said with an exaggerated nod. The tall man lay back on the mossy ground and pulled the bottom of his shirt up past his muscular stomach. Then, his middle began to glow with pale blue light. “He really wants to meet you again and Anna isn’t here so I thought this was the best time.”

The owl spirit. I realized, momentarily being brought back to when I had first met it in the woods behind the boarding house. That had not been very long ago, all things considered, but it felt like it had been years.

It rose out of Arthur and unfurled its wings. One, two, three times, it beat them before taking to the air and ascending into the dark sky. Motes of its pale blue light drifted down as it flew, painting the garden alcove with gentle shadows. Almost like one of my mother’s stories from when I was a child, it gave the place an enchanted feeling and some of the turmoil in my heart was washed away.

The owl spirit swooped down and landed at my feet in an instant.

“Name for a name, for a name, for a name.” It spoke in its crystalline voice and snapped its beak as it looked up at me. Click. Click. Click.

“Does it have a name?” I whispered to Arthur.

The tall man was still laying on his back. He craned his neck up to look at the spirit that lived inside of him. “No. I mean, I’ve never thought to ask him.”

“No, no, no. Never asked, never asked, never asked.” The spirit chirped in triplets. Click. Click. Click.

“How can you have something living inside you and not ask its name,” I said, giving him a playful push. I turned back to the spirit and nodded. “A name for a name. I am Autumn Aubrey. Who are you?”

“Hoo!” The spirit hooted.

I could have imagined it, but it almost sounded like it giggled after its hoot.

Did it just tell a joke? I wondered, smiling widely. The owl was so full of life, so pure, I could not help but be happy in the face of it.

“No, no, no,” Click. Click. Click. “Autumn, Autumn, Autumn,” Click. Click. Click. The spirit broke into what looked like a little dance. Three hops to the left, three hops to the right, and then it would ruffle its wings thrice. “Name for a name, for a name, for a name,” Click. Click. Click. So many motes of its pale blue light were scattering to the ground that its talons were leaving tracks as it danced from side to side. “Opa, Opa, Opa!”

“Your name is Opa?” I asked, reaching my hand out to the owl.

It nuzzled its head into my palm and nipped at my fingers with its beak. “Opa, Opa, Opa!”

Click. Click. Click.

“You are a cute little entity aren’t you?” I laughed.

Opa stepped back and gave me one last repetition of his dance. “No, no, no. Autumn, Autumn, Autumn.”

Click. Click. Click.

The owl spirit took flight again, circling high above where we sat in the garden in a matter of moments.

“Did you hear that? Its name is Opa.” I turned and said to Arthur.

All that was left on the parcel paper was scattered crumbs. The tall man’s bottle of milk lay empty next to it. Still stretched out with his head cradled in his hands, Arthur’s eyes were closed and the slow way he was breathing told me that he had fallen asleep.

“So much for not needing to sleep, huh?” I said to myself as I laid down beside him.

Opa had flown so far upwards that all he appeared to be was a pale blue dot with a trail of light swirling behind him. I finished my milk as I watched him make swooping loop after swooping loop. The night had brought a gentle coolness to the air and sometime after I heard Arthur begin to snore, I decided that sleeping on the mossy ground would not be the worst idea.

After all, it was not as if Anna was upstairs waiting for me.

The sweet faced woman who had been feeding her baby inside the tent crossed my mind. If I ever went down to the city again, I wanted to find her. I didn’t know what I would do once I did, but it felt important to me that I saw her again.

If I ever went down to the city again, I would do anything within my power to not see Patience again.

It became a struggle for me to keep my eyes open and on Opa.

The last thing I remember thinking about was how Patience, right before I had driven my fist into his stomach, had come and told me how to beat his brother.

If I didn’t feel the things I felt about him, I wonder if I would like him. I thought and drifted off to sleep. . .

“Patience?” I called out as soon as my eyes opened and I found myself in his bed alone.

There was no answer. I did not hear him making breakfast in the small kitchen or taking a morning shower.

“Patience?” I shouted again, desperately hoping that he had not heard me the first time.

Alright, Suri. I’ll stay tonight. When he had told me that the night before, after so much arguing and begging, I never imagined that he would leave.

I never thought that he would actually choose her over me.

His absence taught me the truth of my arrogance.

I threw myself out of the bed.

If I hurried, I could stop him before he left Don Viven to go meet her at that inn along the south road.

I thought of her and that little black headed brat that tailed along behind her like a lost puppy.

If I could not stop him, I would kill them both.

The dress I had worn the night before was laying in a heap on the floor. I snatched it over my head and pulled my long red hair back. Without taking the time to so much as pull on my shoes, I left his little room and stepped out into the cold with his name on my lips.

“Patience, how could you?”

I thought of her and that little black headed brat that tailed along behind her like a lost puppy.

If I could not stop him, I would kill them both.