I eventually pull back, my cheeks flaming, and my eyes swollen and achy from tears.

He once again gently wipes the tears away with the pads of his thumbs. “Better?” he inquires softly.

I nod, not trusting myself to speak.

He sighs. “I’m sorry. If I could take this from you, I would.”

“Why are you being so kind to me?” I ask, my voice barely above a whisper. And what I don't say is why is he being kind when I have been a bit... unkind.

He smiles, and it warms something on my insides. “Would you believe me if I said it was out of the goodness of my heart?”

“As if we can afford to have good hearts in our occupations.” I snort, and to my embarrassment, snot goes flying down into his perfect silken shirt and the hilts of some knives peeking around his midsection. My eyes widen in horror and my cheeks grow even redder in mortification.

I feel a rumble in his chest and realize he’s trying not to laugh at me. I smack his shoulder, but that just makes him laugh harder. I chop lightly at his throat, and that finally shuts him up. My lips try to tip up as he chokes.

He fake coughs for another turn, then looks back down at me with something in his eyes that makes me squeak. “Ahhh, little tigress.” I’m tempted to chop his throat again, and he casually brings both hands closer to the vital area. “You might believe you have a dark heart, but you forget, I have seen it this night, and I see nothing but a brave warrior fighting for innocents as best she knows how. If that’s not good, what is?” His voice is soft, but it has me choking up again.

He smushes me against his chest once more, and I breathe deeply of a passing fancy I doubt will come again. Comfort. Peace. Protection. Safety.

That makes me start. I feel safe in his arms. I haven’t felt safe in a very long time. Feeling safe is dangerous. It gets you killed.

So I do the only thing I know how in worlds that involve feelings and talking—I exit the situation. Pulling back, I straighten my cloak and put the emotions where they belong until I'm better able to handle them.

"Where is Sir Solare's family?" I ask, walking away.

He catches up to me, pulling a branch up so I can duck underneath.

"His family is in Mid on the south side. I can take you there, if that's alright?"

I nod. It'd be nice to have someone else there.

He leads the way from the woods, towards the city. He whistles, and I glance at him through narrowed eyes, opening my mouth to ask what he's doing, but a crashing through the underbrush distracts me.

I draw my blades, my heart pounding against my ribcage. It takes a few moments, and then something large and black emerges, snorting and crashing through leaves and branches. His gorgeous hunk of a horse snorts as he comes to a stop in front of Silver Eyes, and the man gives him a carrot that he somehow also had stashed beneath that cloak. Is he carrying a full market on him?

Silver Eyes glances over his shoulder, his eyes laughing at me. I huff and stick my knives back in their sheathes, crossing my arms.

Something like a footstep brushing against a leaf sounds behind me, and next thing I know, I'm on my back looking at a light blue sky through the green leaves dancing above. Ran licks my muddy cheek, her amber eyes dancing when she sticks her big snout in my face, her saber teeth gleaming in the sunlight.

I leave for five minutes to check and make sure this thing's pack isn't around and you find my replacement?

I choke on my spit. Your r-replacement?

She cocks an ear and her eyes twinkle in amusement; she breathes on my face until I can't help but cough at her rancid breath. Someone warm and soft and supportive to lean against in the hard times.

Quit it. He's just been... helpful.

Helpful. Mhmm. Sure. She draws out the last word.

My cheeks grow red, and her smirk grows more pronounced, even as the man swings on his large horse with one swift, graceful movement. The man sits the saddle like a born rider. He smiles at his horse and scratches the big black beauty under his long mane, and the horse puckers his lips in appreciation of Silver Eyes hitting an itchy spot.

You've got it bad.

I jerk my eyes back to my bond from the man. Her tail wags slightly behind her. Erm... what? I ask.

She chortles, a sound I don't think any proper wolf has ever made. Nevermind, rider. Hop on, your man isn't going to wait forever.

My cheeks grow hotter. He isn't my man.

Whatever you say.

Really!

She snickers as I climb on her back.

Ran... I pause.

Ask, sis.

Why didn't the shield work?

You know the answer to that, sister, she whispers, her voice soft and filled with sorrow, as she knows the pain the words send into my heart.

And... I do know. Something about what Natasha told me when she first gave me the Spark. I have to believe in Rose, and in myself.

I didn't. The shield... I asked her to place it because she offered. But I still don't trust her, just as she doesn't trust me. And without trust, there cannot be belief, and without belief... well, miracles don't happen and good people die. Just like that knight. And it pains my heart to know it's partly my fault that he died. If I'd only had more faith in the Spark living in me, he'd still live.

And the worst part? I should trust her. Never has she ever given me a reason not to. And yet, I don't.

Which begs the question: how do I make my heart trust and believe in her, when I truly want to... but don't?

~~~

The way back is quick and uneventful. The trees wave at us in a soft breeze; sunlight sends rays through the canopy above and highlights flowers and moss along the forest floor. It shouldn't be so beautiful after a night filled with blood and death.

Silver Eyes hops off his horse. I quirk my brows as he loosens the girth, taking off the saddle and bridle and setting them to the side. He sits them underneath a cavern-like overhang; I imagine to protect them from the sun and rain.

I narrow my eyes, watching as the horse shakes his mane, then turns and meanders off into the forest with a nicker, as if saying goodbye.

"Be safe, buddy. I'll send someone for you later." I raise a brow at the man, and he looks away innocently, as if he wasn't just caught talking to his horse.

I'm kinda liking this guy.

Kinda? Ran grins at me.

Hush and go with the horse into the wild blue yonder.

She gives me a large wolven grin, gets gooey slobber all over my masked face, then pads off into the woods.

I shake my head, a smile pulling at my lips despite the night we've just went through. That girl. She always knows just what I need.

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Turning back to the man, I find him waiting for me. I follow him the rest of the way between trees and bush, back to the city wall. I wonder how we're going to make it back into the city looking like... this. I'm coated in mud and gunk that stinks so bad my nostrils are going numb, and my usual guide who takes me over the wall has just wondered off into the woods.

But right now... I don't want to ask. Exhaustion pulls at my bones, so I focus on putting one foot in front of the other.

My shoulders slump as Silver Eyes leads me to a side of the wall, well away from the entrance at the western end of the city wall.

"Turn around, please," he says and I jerk my eyes from the ground to meet his, his eyes looking uncertain for the first time since I've seen met him.

It's the please that does it for me. I turn around. Something scrapes lightly against dirt, and his hand squeezes my shoulder. I turn around, my jaw gaping at the door inset into the wall itself, leading into a plain grey and musty smelling passageway lit by waterlights.

"Don't tell anyone?" he requests, polite and slightly... wary, maybe?

I nod, and he walks into the darkened passage without another word. I run a hand over the smooth stone of the wall, trying to figure out how many more of these things there are and if I can sweet talk the locations out of this man.

This would be so much easier than having Ran carry me over the tall and broad wall. Safer too. I need this information.

But one look at his guarded eyes as he watches me from within the dark passageway makes me rethink it.

Someday, maybe, I can bribe the locations. But not today.

At his pointed cough, I follow him. Even though I'm following a strange man into the depths of darkness... I trust him a bit more than I would have, considering I had a cheating glance of his internal matrix and what makes him tick.

The passage follows the crook of the wall, and a little ways down we come to some stairs descending into the ground. He glances at me again, uncertainty in his brow, then goes down. About a dozen stairs lead to a door.

He turns the handle, and we emerge into the cellar of a tavern, if the kegs of ale are any evidence.

The door shuts behind us, leaving us in the dark until he strikes flint and lights a lantern on the wall. I look back at the door, seeing nothing but smooth earthen wall.

I shake my head, rubbing my eyes.

"Coming?" Silver Eyes asks.

"Yeah," I reply, turning from the mystery wall and following the man into the daylight.

It's going to be hard to sneak into the city in broad daylight and tell the family... I wonder if I should wait until night?

But then... someone else likely would have told them by then, which is tempting, but I feel honour bound to get there first. To tell them all what he did for me and how grateful I am for his sacrifice. Even if it doesn't help the sorrow or bring him back, at least it's something I can give back.

He leads me to a top floor of the tavern, only a few times having to dodge someone coming down the creaking stairs or someone coming out of a room. The walls and doors are plain brown and nondescript, with waterlights every once in a while so we can see despite there being no windows along the hallways and stairs, besides one or two tiny slits. This place is built like a fortress.

He opens a door that leads into a much grander room than this tavern should account for. I raise an eyebrow at the man, but he only shrugs.

He again enters first, checking all the corners and opening all the doors and closets, before motioning me in.

He closes the door behind me, locking it, and grabs some clothes from the nightstand with a cute little waterlight shaped like a dragon on top. He takes the clothes in a room with a small wooden tub and sink.

"There is a bath with running water in there," he says, nodding to the room he just exited. "I put a mix of black clothing in there, as well, which may be a little big but should be better than what you have now. You can go first, if you like, and then we will visit Knight Solare's family."

"Thanks," I say, entering the room in a bit of a haze. I don't know what to make of this man. I don't know what to make of my life in general, to be honest.

Being able to scrub the grime and muck from my body and cloak is glorious. I took off the makeshift bandage on my palm and let the water run over the cut that is already starting to heal. It didn't feel good, but it made me feel less dirty despite Silver Eyes already dressing it. Pink water swirls down the drain.

The bath itself is a simple wooden bucket hardly big enough for me to fit in, but the running water reminds me of the Hans' household. I make use of the facility and try on the clothes. They are indeed big, likely for the man in the other room, but a few ties later, and they will at least stay on until I can get back to Hans' house. Wouldn't that be a shocker?

The thought brings a smile to my face. I imagine such a thing would make many of the folks think differently of the Guardian, nudity and all being quite unbecoming of anyone, especially the revered hero of Risia. Maybe then they'd stop worshipping the ground I stand on... if they just realized I'm another person, just like them.

I ring out my cloak, placing the cold fabric back on my shoulders over the borrowed clothes. The dampness seeps into the fabric beneath and makes me shiver, but it's a lot better than walking around with mud and grime caked to the fabric. Or nude. Definitely better than being nude.

I square my shoulders, put the mask back on, and move the vase from the door, unlocking the door and emerging from the room much more refreshed and better smelling than before.

Silver Eyes glances up from where he's looking at some papers, a smile tipping his lips and crinkling his eyes. "Feeling better?"

"Strangely, yes. Thank you for all.. this." I motion to the room.

"It's my pleasure. I'll trade with you, but first—" He holds out a bandage.

I nod, setting my hand on his and letting him wrap it. He tucks the end in with a practiced hand, then kisses the bandage.

I color, looking away and taking my hand back with a cough. We've been flirting all night... but this, back in civilization and in the sunlight, somehow feels more real and less like a game. And I have no time for this.

Ran snickers in the back of my mind. Oh, really? Seems you're making time right now.

Hush, Grandma, I reply, but her amusement doesn't diminish in the least, and neither does my heating cheeks.

Silver Eyes looks up at me, a gentle smile on his lips as if he can read my mind. He rises, going to take his turn with the bath.

Is mind reading a Gift? Blast it all, I sure hope not.

~~~

"My lady," I begin, and I have to cough to get my throat to stop closing and strangling my voice. The elderly woman watches me with a frown on her lips, as if wondering if this is some joke to have a masked and cloaked individual before her mid-day. "I... I am so sorry, but I must inform you that your husband gave his life protecting the innocent and... me." And if I were even a little better at trusting, he'd still live, I add silently.

Don't take the blame, rider. His time had come.

I appreciate the sentiment, but my heart is feeling something else entirely.

Then my Gift flares, and I gasp with the elderly woman as a steel grip of grief strangles her heart and makes it hard to breathe.

Her hand trembles as she reaches blindly to hold onto the doorframe. "W-what?" she asks, her voice barely above a whisper.

"I am so, so very sorry," I say, my voice barely above a whisper as I feel the depth of her pain and disbelief. She loved him so much... and now, he's gone. Stolen. It tears into her heart.

Then the Spark is there, helping in a subdued manner. I think... I think she feels guilty, too, but she shouldn't. This is my fault, not hers. I can trust an assassin after one night, but can't trust the Spark that has only been helpful even when I've almost killed her?

Rider. You fear her and her abilities. But not only that... you link her to those who took our pack. Give yourself a little leeway to feel things, even if those things are not what you wish to feel.

But... why can I not trust her? Shouldn't I trust her?

You don't trust her for the same reason you trust the man. Instinct. She still holds a grudge against you, even if she is trying, and you feel that. The man only harbors goodwill towards you, and you can feel that, too.

Thank you, sister, I say, my heart just a little lighter despite everything.

Then the Spark dampens my Gift, giving me relief from everyone's emotions, but also making Ran feel distant to where I cannot reach out to her. But until I can get through this, I need to keep from crumbling with the grief Miss Solare feels on top of my own growing guilt, even if that means shutting Ran out for a bit.

Miss Solare's entire body trembles with her gasping breaths, and I come back to the present in time to grab hold of her arm in case she feints.

"Mom, what's going on here?" A younger lady with a five or six-year-old lad rushes to her mother, eyeing me suspiciously and putting an arm around her mother's waist.

"It's... it's your father," the elderly woman says, her eyes filling with tears that spill over to her cheeks.

"What?" her daughter asks sharply.

"Where's Papae?" the little boy asks, holding his mother's hand with a white-knuckled grip and watching me with big brown eyes. "Who're you?"

I bend down, my eyes filling with tears. "Who I am is not important. What's important is that your papae was a very brave, very honorable man. He was a hero. He gave his life for mine, and I will be forever grateful."

"Get out of my yard," the younger lady says, her brown eyes flashing but filling with sparkling tears on the bottom lids of eyes that remind me so of the elderly knight who gave his life for mine.

I give them all a deep bow, then turn away.

"Guardian?" I turn back at the trembling voice of the elderly woman. "Thank you."

I bow to Miss Solare again, then exit the place and the sorrow in my heart at seeing their pain. That was just as bad as I expected, but at least now, it's done. Somehow... that doesn't help anything.

I take a deep breath, rubbing my eyes.

"Is there anything more I can do?" the assassin asks from where he's following behind me. He's been like that the entire time, not talking, just a silent support as we traversed the city and told the family.

His white tunic tucked in at the waist and snappy black boots peeking out from silken breeches makes him look more... normal than his all black assassin cloak and attire of before. But this is an upper class, nobleman type of normal. And his knives are hidden, so I can't steal them as easy.

I most definitely do not look normal, and with all those who want my head, I should tell him bye sooner rather than later.

"Thank you for everything, but no."

He takes my hand and plants a chaste kiss on the back of the bandage. I blush, ducking my head. "Until next time, then, mea tigris."

I huff out a breath. "Until the next time we must fight another Bamshee? Looking forward to it."

He chuckles, saluting me and disappearing into the shadow of a nearby alley.

I look back at the quant little house where a family is in mourning and try to ignore the way my chest hurts. If possible, I'll prevent that from happening to my family.

I shake my head and disappear into an alley in the opposite direction from the assassin.

I look up at the bright blue sky and puffy clouds.

Today is my intermission day that they give challengers to recover. Tomorrow, I'll have more matches until I either lose out or fight Sir Xonier in the final championship match.

But that's tomorrow's worry. Right now, it's time to pass a note to a Thieves' Guild messenger and visit the fairies. I have a rescue to plan.