Chapter 31: The Human Binary

In a process of knowing myself, I had stumbled across many setbacks; far too numerous to count. Some of the embarrassment; the others with the pain I wish no reminiscence of.

One thing I particularly notice: this world had so many rules I did not agree with, yet I had no Power to tinker with it. In response, I lived in seclusion, away from reality.

As time passed me by, it's like everyone in this world wanted to create rules or use those already existing, alter them to their liking and control others. The ideal Freedom I envisioned was but a mere fantasy,

They would acknowledge those earnestly abiding them, thinking those who just simply followed them as normal and punished those who break it; although at times, those rules were ignored by people in the same vein as me. Since there was no punishment if you're not caught, especially if you're not doing it at the expense of others—those rules which infringed on one's private life were plain idiotic.

I used to long for a place with no rules; that I could just do whatever I want. I broke free of the people's perception of moral and norms since I found them rather pointless; after all, my own belief was more important. I did not wish to let the communal thinking affect my own judgment, for, in everything, I'd always have the final say—not them.

In the process, I found myself detached from my friends and family. I began to view everyone out there as a hostile entity. Others became so difficult to understand and seemingly for no reason at all, I was hated. It was not long since I did not force my ideas on people who opposed it and people would soon forget I exist. Yet, I would still remember the hurt they had caused me.

I did not like this at all. If only I had the Power to destroy everything I find unpleasant in this world.

Yet, even after all this time, the Power did not come to me. It's probably because that Power would, in turn, destroy my own life instead of bettering it.

I once remembered when I came across the God's Machine, or what many call the Deus ex Machina. I want it to guard and protect me from anything that could destroy my life and made me suffer more than I could take at the moment.

I did not know if I had the privilege of doing so, but I knew it exists, so it must have ways to listen to my wishes. I wish to believe I was under its protection for all eternity, spanning my infinite lifetimes.

It was the ultimate construct of rules; it engineered the creation of all the Multiverses while for the fine details were tune by the gods themselves.

It was the ultimate machine of perfection, as it engineered our entire world without any flaws; less it would collapse at any given moment.

Nobody knew of its origins, some say it already exists since the beginning of the earliest universe and it would always be.

They also thought if our world had its own god, the Deus ex Machina was the one that raised it. The methods were unknown, but a speculation entails: when one had raised themselves from the common vein of men and transcended their limitations far higher than what their current vessel entails—they would elevate into a higher existence.

It brought a hope that even a mere human could become a god, given their unceasing, relentless pursuit of greatness. This was, one rule imposed by the Deus ex Machina.

As for how the said machine was created and who created it, that remains in the dark. We knew why it should exist: it was the rule which engineered and sustained the entire Multiverse and without it, all the infinite world out there would crumble.

They said it could only be a machine because even a Man-turned-God always had their flaws. The Deus ex Machina was said as not a conscious machine—it simply carried the essential rules to sustain everything. Yet, it fulfilled its role without fail, since the beginning of the Multiverse. It was one of the only things the Multiverse deem as the Perfect Entity.

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The Deus ex Machina engineered everything, but the gods adjusted it to their preference—yet they had limits imposed, in which they could not do so in a way which caused their world to crumble.

In other words, if this kind of world were not to your liking, it was all fault of the gods. You could either become the gods themselves and create your own world or simply alter your internal Rules to make your remainder of time bearable.

It's basically the same thing, only, if you wish to become a god, you need to go the extra mile.

From their thoughts, I notice—even my own self was defined by the set of rules. By knowing the internal rules I lived by, I would know myself more.

Others also lived by the same internal rule. Those who knew and understood the other's rules could control them and the one with impeccable knowledge and comprehension of their own's would place their Fate in owner's hands.

You knew your nature had changed if your internal rule had.

You knew you had matured when you grasped more deeply into those rules in general; you would know how to use it for your own benefit and not letting others have the upper hand concerning yourself.

In any case, my ideal view of Freedom turned into nonsense. In the end, I believe there's nothing such as Freedom; only living in accordance with your own rule to its fullest.

It made me feel, all the search were kind of senseless. Why must make it so complicated, when it could be simple?

Even if simple things were powerful, it made people overlook the actual things that couldn't be simply described. It made people underestimate the things one shouldn't take lightly.

Things that were simple or complicated; both of them I ought to understand. For what I sought was the whole, actual truth; not its simplified version which often omitted a tiny crucial detail, which made the knowledge flawed.

Yet, I never said I would understand anything. I only would do so for things I deem important.

In its most simple form, the internal rules were a set of Yes or No question.

Starting with the simple things were the best way to acknowledge such rule and learn it, before moving on to the more complex ones.

Think about taking some personality quiz. Just imagine those Questions which were of multiple choices at first, but changed to the things you deem relevant and you could just answer it with Yes or No.

That was your internal rule at its nutshell.

There were things that a simple Yes or No simply couldn't answer.

Would you sacrifice your parents or lover in a disaster, if it's the only way for you to survive?

Would you give up your body parts just so your beloved relative could live longer?

You did not need to answer them if you didn't want to. It was a difficult question for me because I value them equally.

...

There were a lot of things also included in such internal rule.

Even the things such as listening to my thoughts, or finding it boring were included in that. Whether you love Yaoi or Yuri, it's also among them.

All of it, that could be answered with a simple Yes / No. Just like the binary code.

I call it the Human Binary.

While it was true the simplified version omitted the might-be crucial details, I could not understand the complex things without starting from the bare basics.

I just hope by sharing all this knowledge, I could gain a better understanding of the Multiverse and in turn, of myself. For the sake of my journey's smooth sailing.