"No! Just NO! This is a Smoke Pit, boy, not some damned make-shift forge. You want to melt down some rock you found in the mud? Not here! Take it elsewhere. We've worked hard on this pit, and I'm not about to let you ruin it."

Ozzy and the smoke golem glared at each other. Joe had shifted to his monstrous form. Long, smoky chains were dangling from his arms and his eyes were aflame. "Dammit Joe, we don't have time for this. We need to melt it down and this is the only magical fire we have."

"Didn't your mama teach you what NO! means? You’re not so big that I can't teach you myself! And where are you going with that screaming coal? Do you know how tough that is to get? Do you remember we had to trap an angel last time? An angel!"

Ozzy set down the coal and raised both hands, palm out, in a placating gesture, "Sorry, sorry. I just sort of thought you might like to toss a Star Spawn down in there."

Joe's eyes narrowed and Ozzy had his undivided attention. It was an unsettling feeling. "Star Spawn? You said you had some meteorite you needed to melt down."

"I do! And I'm damned sorry for not explaining better. We fought some horrible metal monster over in the Glade. Big fight but Jon chopped its head off. Looks like a big meteor. Ben says there's something called a Star Spawn in the rock. Goes by the name of M'Fargle. Hurts my head to even say it. The thing is constantly screaming directly into our brains. We had to get a Bard to drown it out. Level 15 Epic Boss from what we can tell."

Joe turned back into his human-shaped form. Where he had towered over Ozzy before, he now looked like a 90-year-old farmer in overalls. Granted, everything about him was in shades of gray from his bald head to the laces on his boots. "Well, I'm going to say that's a different sort of situation entirely. A screaming-star-spawn we can toss in the pit? Well, I might allow that."

The golem paused and thought, "But we do it right! Let’s put about two tons of that normal coal you've been digging out from under Makken's house into the pit first. Then I'm going to want to dump all four barrels of Dark Mana we have on top of it before we finish off the stack with the Screaming Coal. If we're burning something to death, I say we do it right."

"Got it, Boss," Ozzy ran to the coal pile to get things started. Two tons of coal to start with would make the hottest fire he knew of. This was going to be one hell of a fire. And it really needed to be.

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Moving the cart was difficult. The wheels sunk over a foot into the soft ground. It was a lot easier in the end to just have four workers pick up the cart and pack it over to the town. The cart wasn't built to hold the weight of a three-ton chunk of metal. They took it slowly to keep the load level - which was difficult when they had to be so near to the thing. Coglin was singing a counter-tune which could cancel another bard's song, a monster's roar, or the music of a siren. It was helping immensely but couldn't stop all of the mental scream. The strain of carrying the cart was much less than the strain of being to near to M'Fargle.

Titania caught up to Suzette. She took the barmaid by the arm and started talking to her in a calm voice that didn't quite hide all her worry, "I know what your hunk of a boyfriend is going to try to do. It might just work, but not without help. Even that charnel pit isn't going to be enough. We need every single thing we can think of to increase the heat of that fire. And then we also need a way to keep the heat inside. No good melting the stone foundations of half the town."

Suzette really didn't like that idea, "We can't just dump it out in the wilds? Or down a mine?"

Titania shook her head, "Nope. It will come back. And then you'll see a gaggle of flying wizards around the town and this whole chunk of land will get purged. We have to deal with it, and that overgrown bar-b-que pit is the only fire we have that stands a chance. You're going to have to seal it off though."

Suzette stopped and looked at the old witch, "Seal? As in a Hermetic Seal? If it's that powerful, then it will break my spell fast."

Titania pulled her along and patted her arm, "Not to worry. It won't be just you. We need to set up a Witches' Circle and ramp up the power. Thirteen would be ideal, but if we can get at least seven it will work. You start thinking on how you're going to cast your Seal on that pit, I'll get the Circle set up.

You are Called!

Suzette, the Lonely Barmaid has begged aid from Titania of the Broken Circle. Titania invites any Witch, Follower of Hermes, or practitioner of the Old Ways to come join her and her sister in a witch’s circle.

Tea and cookies will be served if any of us survive.

Adrianna heard the call, set down her sewing and yelled to her husband, "Dear? I'm going out for a while. Something interesting has come up.”

Zephyr barreled down the stairs from her room, "MOM! I have to go. Suzette needs me! There’s...”

Adrianna cut her off, "I know dear, I'm going as well. Best to not upset you father. He doesn't meet the requirements.”

From Aleister’s lab was the sound of breaking glass, a minor explosion, and then the clean smell of lemon scented fire retardant being sprayed around the room. Aleister came out of the lab with some of his hair still smoldering, "Damnable blue boxes! They always startle me when they pop up and they make me drop things! What were you shouting about dear? I have an emergency and have to go out."

The College of Practical Alchemy and Experimental Magics is proud to announce a surprise experiment!

This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author's consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.

Professor Johannes will lead a group of local alchemists and sages in an unbefore attempted experiment to increase the temperature and heat of a Tier 2 Charnel Pit to unheard of levels. Anyone with their own crazed idea is invited to come join the fun!

We don't guarantee survival, but we do guarantee you will learn something!

(Possibly new ways to NOT do things. But that's something, right?)

"Ooh, I get a choice! Can I do both?" Zephyr had gotten both announcements.

"Best to pick just one, dear. Why don't the two of us go help Suzette form a circle? We may even get some new skills out of it?"

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The cart finally made it to the back side of the town. Ozzy met them there wearing just his kilt. "I'll take it from here guys. I'm a little afraid of getting this thing too close to the town and having that red shit spread, so I'm taking it in hot." Makken stood behind him soaking him down with a bottle of dwarven whiskey. He took a long swig for himself. His head was pounding hard and odd ideas about inter-breeding peppers with ferrets were getting stuck in his head. How the hell did these humans tolerate this thing so well?

Ozzy winced as the whiskey hit some tender spots. "Damn, careful where you slosh that stuff. I just gained experience in resist torture."

The dwarf just laughed, "Better a splash of whiskey in the wrong place than a trip to the healer to explain where you picked up 'Legionnaires' Rot', or so my granny used to say."

"Ok, you're covered. I'll light you up when you're ready."

Everyone stepped back at that statement. Ben hit all four of the workers that had carried the wagon with Healing Flame to make sure none of them had picked up a bit of Rustblight. He was going to burn the cart entirely once Ozzy got the rock out of it. The glade and the path they took was getting a once over as well, with workers checking everywhere, and fire being applied where needed. This new type of Rustblight from M'Fargle spread quickly, and to anything living or made of metal.

Ozzy nodded to the dwarf who took a lucifer matchstick and lit him on fire. Whiskey flames engulfed him, not harming his kilt at all, but burning him clean of any contagion. Ozzy held his breath and reached in to grasp the meteor. Immediately his head started to hurt and teeth ache. Coglin brought out a fiddle and played a tune, stomping his feet and singing a counter-song, his voice coming faster and faster. Ben followed the two of them, alternating spells of Healing Flame on the two of them, just in case.

Something clicked in Ozzy's head and the pain eased.

"Ah, finally! Y''ve mgepah l' ah'gotha ymg' ahe barbarians l' ai correctly. Ymg' ah commended llll being l' lloigog. Y' reward ymg' llll title "First Thrall". Y' mgep someone else ph'nglui lloig, mgng h' got huggy ng Y' mgep l' h' mgulnah l' recycling."

You are learning to speak to this lonely and strange visitor from the stars! M'Fargle offers you the title "First Thrall", a new language and new opportunities to please him. As you are strong, he offers you strength. You will gain +10 STR, +20 Enhancement Points to be used only on new abilities, and the skill: Dominate Lesser Lifeform.

Accept: Y/N?

"Makken, more whiskey. Ben, just burn the crap out of me, no healing."

Both of his friends went along with his commands. Ozzy didn't actively resist the flames and started taking damage. He also began to run. No one but Joe was near the pit when he got there. Ozzy ran to the edge and jumped down to the solid ledge around the fire pit, and laid the metal ball on the coals where it sank halfway in.

The heat was intense. It was many times hotter than a wood fire. He was burning stamina fast, and his health was going down. Smokey chains wrapped around him and drew him up and out of the pit. Joe looked at him with a bit of concern. "Damned fool of a Butcher! Why not just toss it down there?"

Ozzy shook his head. "That thing weighs three tons. It would have sunk too far into the coal. We need every bit of heat on it. It sank down a couple of feet just from its weight." From the pit came a long, angry wail. It cut into Ozzy's brain like a knife, but the smoke golem just smiled.

"You were right about tossing that thing in. That's some first rate screaming, that is! Now get that poker of yours, and start concentrating on your pit. You're going to have to hold it all together. A Tier 2 pit is a tough thing and can handle a coal fire, but we're going to need to go a lot hotter than that. I'll work the flames, and you keep the stones of the pit from melting."

"Oh, shit," Ozzy hadn't really considered that problem. He summoned his weapon and set the butt of it on the edge of the pit. The Butcher, the Charnel Pit, and the Ancient Billhook of Entwined Fates were all tied tightly together. Ozzy concentrated on the stones lining the Pit, feeling the heat weakening them and tried to hold them together with his will. His mana started to tick down.

Coglin came up and stacked the four empty barrels into a pyramid. Then he perched on top of the second level and began playing "The Devil Came down to Georgia."

Suzette walked up to Ozzy and gave him a kiss on his cheek, "You've got this. We can help." She began moving around the edge of the pit, marking symbols in the dirt. Zephyr and Titania followed, adding a ring of salt, and colored glass beads into the runes. They rejoined the rest of their circle, standing thirty feet away from Ozzy. All seven women held hands and began to chant. Ben knew all but two. Suzette and Titania were joined by Adrianna, Zephyr, and Betty. One of the women he couldn't place, but she looked familiar. The last was a green-skinned goblin wearing a skirt and halter made of leather and chains, and not a lot else. Ben saw her drink down half a bottle of "Red Wizard Whiskey" before she tossed the bottle into the pit. She waved at him and yelled, "Hi, Uncle CourierBen. Great Party!"

Ben groaned. Chaperone to a drunken, juvenile, goblin witch wasn't in his skill set.

From the Pit came the sound of roaring flames, and increasingly angry screams as things started to heat up.

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