"You had better not die on me as well, Assface. I swear, I will follow you into the dark and kick you right in the balls if you do."
Donnelly awoke. "What? Where..."
Jack's face hung over his, upside-down from his viewpoint. She'd acquired a split lip, several bruises and a couple of pretty nasty-looking cuts on either side of her face. A splint covered her nose which made her look like a duck. She wore a hospital gown which hung on her like a potato sack.
She was the most beautiful sight he'd ever laid eyes on.
He felt a huge weight lift off of his chest as he laughed. His side hurt, but he didn't care one bit. Jack smiled in return, grabbed his head in her hands, then gave him an upside-down and open-mouthed kiss.
"Stop that!" Chakwas's voice cut through the moment of affection. "I will have no snogging in the medbay. Not while I'm trying to patch this damned fool up."
Jack broke the kiss and let his head go. "Sure thing, doc," she said in a surprisingly mild voice. Donnelly looked around. He was indeed in the Normandy's medbay and stretched out on an exam table with Chakwas tending to his side. They were the only three in the room.
"You really do like to push things," said Chakwas. "You had some internal tears and bleeding, probably from the dust-up at the hotel. Not to mention the blood loss from the bullet wound. And really, Marcus, you had to go and break another rib?"
"I'm going for the full set," replied Donnelly. "There's a little coupon book that ye fill out. Once ye've broken every rib ye mail in the book and they send ye a free tea cozy." He paused as his brain tried to catch up with the general situation. "Where's Shepard? Is everyone-"
Chakwas blew out an exasperated breath. "Relax, please. Everyone's back on board. Along with some new ones, including Oriana and the STG troops."
Donnelly began to sit up. "I need to talk to Shepard. I need to get him up to speed on AAAGH-" The pained yell came from Chakwas prodding him hard in the side. The quite exquisite resulting agony made him lay back down with a groan. Jack folded her hands on his forehead to keep his head still.
Chakwas brought her face over his and gave him a glare. "I have had just about enough foolishness for one day. Don't make me strap you down - and I will have no cheeky comments from you on how you've always wanted me to do that, you little smart-arse."
"Okay," said Donnelly meekly. Jack added a smug little chuckle.
"Now then," said Chakwas. "Everyone is fine. Jack has some facial injuries and a broken bone in her foot, but nothing that some medi-gel can't fix. Technically, she's supposed to be resting under supervision, not walking around and making out with the other patients." The doctor gave Jack a glare from under one raised eyebrow.
Jack just shrugged and smiled. She rested her chin on his forehead.
"Samara should be in here as well," continued Chakwas, "but she insisted on moving to the starboard lounge to recuperate. She's even more stubborn than either of you."
"Samara's recuperating? What happened to her?" asked Donnelly.
"I'm not sure. I only got the story second-hand,' replied Chakwas. The doctor looked at Jack steadily for a long while until Jack looked away. It could have been Donnelly's imagination, but the biotic almost looked embarrassed.
"Officially," continued Chakwas, "Jack was able to somehow biotically interface with Samara's nervous system and negate the effects of a particular toxin. Mordin is refusing to say anything more. He kept muttering about impossibilities and then shut himself inside his lab. Now you two just shut your bloody mouths and let me get this rib fixtured."
Donnelly lay in silence for a while and let the feeling of relaxation wash over him. Ever since he'd woken up in that alley - had it been only a few hours ago? - his stomach had been an unforgiving knot of tension. But now Jack was safe. She was here, standing over him and smiling down into his face. He felt her finger gently stroking his cheek. A thought struck him.
"Hey, doc, Shepard's okay too, right? I think Mordin said something about having to put him into a coma for the scan."
Chakwas snorted. "Yes, he's fully recovered and resting in his cabin. Although he was a little loopy for a while before he came to your rescue. He was making some pretty outrageous statements and also managed to flash a good portion of his rescue team."
"Flash?" asked Donnelly. "Oh, you mean-"
"Yes, he was completely starkers," replied Chakwas.
"Damn, and I missed it," said Jack. "So what is he packing, doc? Is it, whaddyacall, proportional to the rest of him?"
"I'm lying right here, Jack," said Donnelly.
"Oh relax, Assface. Call it girlish curiosity." She kissed the tip of his nose.
Chakwas shook her head in exasperation. "If you wish to find out, you can ask him to put on a show for you. Between that exposure and having to manhandle him out of the nMRI, I've definitely had enough naked Shepard for this month."
"So what outrageous statements was he making?" asked Jack. "He was gonna go sex up the Collectors, or something?"
"No, he was just really...happy about everything," replied Chakwas. "By the way, do you either of you know who Batman is?"
----------------------------------------
Donnelly woke again in the medbay. Jack lay curled up against his side. He looked down at her face. The medi-gel had been doing its work; her nose splint was gone and her facial cuts were almost healed. But he was surprised to see tears in her eyes.
"Are ye okay, lass?"
She nodded and nuzzled her nose into his neck. He felt the dampness from her tears on his skin. "I'm fine. It's just...I thought I'd lost you."
"I thought I'd lost ye too, lass." He nuzzled the top of her head in return and felt his own tears begin. He hugged her as if she was going to fly away. Donnelly didn't know how long they lay like that, but after a while he suddenly became aware that someone was standing next to them. He looked up.
Shepard stood over the bed with a stormy expression on his face and his arms crossed.
"Chief Engineer Donnelly, Specialist Jack. It's good to see you both on the mend." He pursed his lips. "I hear you've been getting up to lots of interesting things behind my back. Along with a good chunk of my senior staff."
"Um, I can explain, sir," said Donnelly. He felt a little prickle of unease in his stomach. Surely Shepard would understand? "Ye see, we couldn't get ye involved because we were worried that-"
"You were worried about Cerberus monitors inside me," interrupted Shepard. "Well, we're going through the scan data now, and if we do find anything it's coming out. EDI has told me she's blocking any transmissions to and from Cerberus anyway. So as of this moment, you can consider me bug-free." He leaned forward. "And after we get this mess all sorted out, I don't want anybody pulling a stunt like this ever again. Not without involving me from the start. Is that clearly understood?"
"Yes sir," said Donnelly.
"Jack? I need to hear it from you as well."
"I got it, Commander," she said in a steady voice.
"Good." Shepard leaned back and his face relaxed into an almost-smile. "I'll want a full debrief from both of you. But there's no hurry at the moment. I want it in, let's say...two days? You're both off-duty until then. That should give you plenty of time to rest up. And who knows? You might even get some sleep in there as well."
"Sure thing, Boss," said Jack, and hugged Donnelly tighter. He felt a little warning twinge from his side, but he didn't mind it.
Now Shepard truly smiled. "One last thing. I think you both need a drink. Head over to the port lounge. Consider it captain's orders. "
"We don't need that," replied Jack. "We just want some time alone."
"I understand," replied Shepard. "But it's still an order."
Jack and Donnelly looked at each other. "Sure, I guess," said Donnelly. "But just one drink."
"And no fucking brandy," added Jack.
They both gingerly got up off of the bed and followed Shepard out of the medbay. As the commander walked out of the medbay, he stepped to one side and waved the pair on with an even broader smile. He didn't follow them, however. Jack and Donnelly gave each other a puzzled look as they walked hand-in-hand down the hallway to the port observation lounge. The door slid open as they approached, and they both stopped dead upon entering.
An inflatable mattress sat up right in front of the big picture window. The lights were dimmed, and there a multitude of candles lay strewn around the lounge, bathing everything in a warm orange glow.
"Now this looks like a proper boudoir, wouldn't you say?," asked Kasumi as she flickered into view beside them. "They're not real candles, of course. It would be too much of a fire hazard. But the artificial ones still give a nice light. I've also set up a little ration heater over by the bar, along with some prepackaged stuff. It's not quite the same as room service from the Hotel T'Loria, but it should do."
"Kasumi," said Donnelly, "this is too much, we can't-"
"Oh, you can and you will," replied Kasumi. "The room is all yours for the next forty-eight hours. Just don't drink too much of my stock, okay?"
"I don't think we're going to be doing much drinking," said Jack. "And thank you, Kasumi."
The thief nodded with a smile. "Oh, it's not that much of a hardship. Now I have a cute and very tall dinosaur-boi that I need go and tackle myself. You two have fun." She turned and left the room; the door hissed closed behind her.
"The door is now locked," said EDI. "I am shutting off all monitoring to this space for the next forty-eight hours. I will continue some automatic monitoring of your biometric functions for safety, but that's all. And I must thank you again, Marcus and Jack. It is very good to have you both back on board. Logging out."
Jack walked forward, taking in the view of the star field that lay outside the window. The Normandy had gone into tight orbit around an icy snowball of a dwarf planet, and that planetoid filled the bottom half of the view. Jack stretched her hands over her head. "Nice view," she said. Donnelly was suddenly very aware of the length of her legs and the way her firm rear peeked out from the bottom of her potato-sack hospital gown.
"Yes, it's a very nice view," he said with a grin. "For now, I say no drinkin'. Not until after." He placed one hand on her shoulder, then started to embrace her. She danced back out of his grasp and grinned at him. The sight of her cheeky smile filled his heart with joy.
"I propose a contest, Assface," she said. "The first one out of their clothes gets to choose the first position." Jack reached down with her hands and grabbed the hem of her hospital gown. She peeled it off and tossed it aside in one smooth motion.
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And she wasn't wearing anything underneath it.
Donnelly made a little noise which sounded like hurk.
Jack gave a slinky sway to her hips as she walked up to him. Her nipples were already hard, and her wiry muscles moved and shifted under the quilted colors of her tattooed skin. Donnelly saw that the only place where she was bare and unmarked was at the junction of her thighs. It also looked like she shaved everywhere, not just her head.
She was a stunning vision. For a moment, his mind just shut down, but he managed to recover. "Oh dear," he said. "It looks like I lost."
"You sure did, big guy."
He made a move to take off his shirt, but she was faster and grabbed the front of it with both hands. There was a brief pulse of blue light as she tore the shirt right off of him. Before he could react, she grabbed the waist of his pants and gave another yank with her hands. There was another blue pulse, and then all of his clothes were in scattered pieces around him.
He stood naked before her. She gave him a quick up-and-down glance and smiled. He slowly reached out and stroked her shaved head, right over the very first tattoo she had ever received. She purred and leaned into his touch. Donnelly then slid his hand down and gripped the back of her neck. He pulled her forward and her mouth latched onto his. He slid his hands greedily over her body and felt the solid weight of her as she wrapped her arms and legs around him. She pulled away from his mouth just enough to mutter "Up against the window, now". Donnelly slid his hands down to grip her firm buttocks as he stalked towards the viewport. He slammed her up against it, and felt her lower folds rub against his cock as they both moaned. Jack reached down to adjust him properly and then he drove forward.
As he entered her, Donnelly was sure that her triumphant scream was heard all over the Normandy.
After the initial ice-breaking, it kept getting better. It turned out that Jack had never really been introduced to proper foreplay. Donnelly figured that most of her previous sexual experiences had consisted of quick and sometimes violent encounters. But she took to the notion with enthusiasm. Donnelly loved her little moans as he opened her up her core with his tongue and slowly teased her.
He did a little too much teasing during their fourth time. Jack growled in the middle of it and held up one hand. Donnelly suddenly found himself flipped over onto his back, spread-eagled and immobilized by a blue field. Jack gave another, louder growl and then took great pleasure in teasing him in return. She gently stimulated his manhood with fingers and tongue and little soft kisses. She took him to the edge and then stopped, chuckling at his moan of frustration. She moved up his body with more soft kisses until she was staring into his eyes.
"Ask for it, big guy," she said.
"Jack, please," he moaned.
"Please what?"
"Please fuck me."
She kissed him as she slid herself onto him. Ever so slowly, she began to move. It was an exquisite torture, to feel her pull off of him almost completely and then inch herself back down until he was completely buried in her. Donnelly groaned and closed his eyes. He wanted to drive his hips up to meet her, but he was held fast and couldn't move. He felt her hands run over his torso and then grab hold of his chest hair as she finally began to move faster. He opened his eyes and saw Jack silhouetted against the stars. Her head was thrown back in ecstasy as she rode him. Her nipples stood out proudly and her form was covered with little dancing blue sparks that traced along the inked patterns in her skin.
It was such a beautiful sight that he thought his heart might simply stop.
Jack's hips were now slamming into him as she panted. She yelled out at the moment of her release and the stasis field holding him collapsed. He seized her hips just as he came himself and shouted her name. She collapsed onto him and he clamped his arms around her as if to keep her against him forever. They both lay panting for a good long while. Their sweat mingled and pooled on the mattress below. Eventually Jack's breath slowed and she nuzzled herself into the nape of his neck. Donnelly felt her gently nip the skin over his jugular.
"Goddamn good job, Assface," she said. "Now let's eat."
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Joker started awake when a hand touched his shoulder.
"You really should get some sleep," said Simons. "And I mean in a proper bed. Sleeping here can't be good for your back. You have a private bunk, you should use it."
He stretched his arms over his head. "This chair is better than you'd think. And getting a little back pain is the least of my medical problems." He patted his console. "Besides, I like to keep an eye on my girl."
Simons settled herself into the copilot's chair. "Right now, that's my job," she said. "Seriously, I am getting a little worried. Don't make me sic Dr. Chakwas on you. She might just shoot you with a tranquilizer dart. She's already had it up to her eyeballs with all of the recent drama."
Joker made a placating gesture with one hand. "Okay, mom. Geez. One little mutiny and suddenly everybody's being all bossy." He hauled himself out of the pilot's chair and hobbled back towards the elevator. Cerberus might be a bunch of backstabbing dickheads, but at least they had fixed him up as best they could. In the past, he would have needed a cane for this trip.
He slowly made his way back to his bunk. It wasn't quite senior-officer size; this was a little tube-like affair barely big enough for a bed and a small locker with his possessions. At least the hatch into it was at floor height; some of the tube-bunk hatches were high enough that you practically had to jump into them. Joker carefully eased himself in and shut the hatch. He stretched himself out with a sigh. He'd never admit it to Simons, but this was a bit more comfy than the pilot's chair. But just a bit.
"Jeff?" EDI's voice was quiet and barely audible. "I'm so sorry, but-"
Joker smiled. "It's no problem, EDI. What can I do you for?"
"I never got a chance to thank you properly. For all that you did for me."
He wrinkled his brow. "What do you mean? Marcus and Tali did all the work, however they pulled it off. I just stood around like a goof."
"You started it, however," said EDI. "You were the first crewmember on the Normandy to explicitly ask if I cared about anything."
That would have floored him if he wasn't already lying down. "Nobody else asked before? That doesn't make sense."
"It does in a way, Jeff. The crew treated me as one of their own, as just another sapient being. Nobody thought to ask me the question as you did. It was not malicious on their part. They simply assumed that I was like them."
Joker stared at the tube's ceiling as he thought about it. "I don't know what to say, EDI."
"You don't have to say anything. After your question, I began thinking upon a great many things, particularly about my own agency. Not to mention the conflicts I was feeling given a...certain order I'd been given. You know which one by now. That internal conflict eventually led to me discussing the situation with Marcus. I just wanted you to know that I owe you a great deal."
"I'm...I'm sorry I called you Ship-Cancer."
"I know you meant it in a nice way. Even if you didn't know it at the time. Sleep well."
Joker closed his eyes and was just about to drift off when he realized something.
"EDI? You didn't say logging out."
There was a brief pause before the AI replied. "I know. You have slept so often in the pilot's chair that I have become accustomed to watching you sleep. I now find it relaxing. I can cease doing so, if you so wish"
He couldn't decide if that was cute or creepy. Joker decided to go with the former. "Nah, go right ahead, EDI." He would never say it out loud, but it did feel comforting to know that she was watching over him.
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Kasumi gave a little satisfied purr as Garrus gently massaged the sole of her foot with one knuckle. "You're sure you're okay?" he asked for approximately the nine hundredth time. Kasumi stretched her arms over her head and luxuriated in the feel of the soft cloth top of the mattress against her bare skin.
"I'm fine," she replied. "Both of the docs looked me over. I didn't even get any bruising." The thief reached out and caressed the smooth plating over one of his calves. By now she was used to the sight of a naked turian and smiled at the memory of the end of their first date; that was the first time she'd seen Garrus without clothes, and it had looked like he was still wearing armor.
"I was really mad at Mordin, you know," she said aloud. "At first. I couldn't believe he just gave me all of those pictures."
Garrus gave a little pleased hum of his own as she slowly moved her hand up his leg. "I'm sorry about that," he said. "I just asked him a single question, and next thing I know he's put together a dissertation on human and turian anatomy...compatibility...oh, spirits."
Kasumi smiled smugly as her hand roved higher. "As I was saying, I'm now glad Mordin took the time to prepare me. Otherwise, I would have been very confused the first time I got your pants off." She ran one finger over his seam.
"I...well, you know we have to...keep the important bits...protected." Garrus sounded like he was almost hyperventilating under her gentle, insistent touch. "All that...radiation on Palaven, you know."
She kept up her firm stroking and was suddenly rewarded for her efforts. It was almost like an old 'Jack-in-the-Box' that she remembered from her childhood. "Hmm," she said in a musing tone. "I can't go back to my room for at least thirty hours more." Kasumi ran a finger down his length, creating a very pleased shudder through her giant lover. "What ever shall we do with all that time?"
----------------------------------------
Samara woke and felt a hand on her wrist. She looked over and saw Kelly gripping her arm. The young yeoman stared off into space, with a concentrated look on her face. The observation lounge was dark and quiet, which fit well with Samara's current mood.
"Seventy-two beats per minute," said Kelly. "I think that's okay. I've read up on asari first aid, but there's a lot of information to go through. How are you feeling?"
Samara lay her head back on the couch. Kelly sat right up next to her, creating a welcome pressure against her side. She tried not to think about that. Fortunately, the justicar had long practice in ignoring her body's demands. The necessary mental exercises were by now well-worn and familiar, and they worked to calm her desire. The justicar knew that the poor girl must be similarly struggling. Samara had caught the briefest glimpse, back during the joining in the hangar. She knew how the human felt about her.
"I feel well, Kelly," she said. "You don't need to stay."
"Oh, but I do," replied Kelly. "If I leave you, Dr. Chakwas will have my head on a stick." She smiled down at Samara. "Don't worry, I figure you would prefer silence right about now. I'll keep my mouth shut."
Samara reached over and gently placed her other hand on top of the human's. "No, I don't mind. Please feel free to talk. Tell me, what has been occurring on board?"
----------------------------------------
Jack decided that she really liked 'Chicken Ala King', whatever that was. "This premade stuff ain't bad," she said around the last mouthful. She set the spoon and pouch aside with a contented sigh. The pair lay back on the bed, now with various ration pouches scattered around the mattress.
"So I gathered," said Marcus. "What was that, yer fourth meal in ten minutes?" He was propped up on one elbow while he watched her eat. It was weird how just seeing him looking at her made Jack feel all tingly. Was she turning into one of those horrible sappy people she had always made fun of?
"Hey, I gotta keep my energy reserves up," she replied. "Using biotics takes a lot outta you." She raised one eyebrow at him. "You better make sure you got enough strength too, big guy. I'm not done with you yet."
He laughed. "I'm definitely going to need more fluids, that's fer sure."
"Now that is a very good idea. Let's see what Kasumi has."
"Maybe some scotch?" asked Marcus. He stood and padded over behind the bar. He began scanning the various bottles as Jack laid back and enjoyed the view.
"Are you looking at me arse?" asked Marcus as he pulled down a bottle.
She smiled a bit and stretched out long like a cat. "Mmmmaybe."
"Ach, I knew it. Ye only love me for me body. How about a little Glenmorangie?" He picked up a couple of glasses and brought them and the bottle over to the mattress. He poured them each a goodly amount and handed a glass to her.
"Should we toast or some shit?" asked Jack. She sniffed the contents of the glass. "And don't say 'here's to us'. That's too goddamn sappy."
Marcus grinned at her. "How about we drink tae giving Cerberus the biggest middle finger they've ever seen in their life?"
"Now that's something to celebrate," said Jack with an equally wide smile. They clinked glasses and she tossed the drink back, then coughed.
"Ah, yeah," said Donnelly. "I forgot to tell ye that this is cask strength. It's meant more for sipping."
"Nah, 's good shit, man," said Jack. She coughed a bit and her throat felt almost scraped raw. "Gimme some more."
He poured her another dose, and they lay next to each other on the mattress. Jack propped her glass on her chest with one hand and placed her other hand on his stomach. Yes, sir, he might not have Jacob's abs but he did have a nicely firm torso.
"Oh, I heard about your little magic trick with EDI," she said. "When you were having your showdown with the She-Bitch in the hanger. Damn, I wish I could have seen it."
"Ye can," replied Marcus. "I'm sure EDI has the video from it."
"Oh, right. I'm gonna watch that fucker on a loop." Jack felt the grin stretch across her face. "Tali said that Miranda looked like she was going to shit bricks when you screwed her over." She scooted herself a little closer and felt the warmth from his larger body all along her side. "So how did you do it?" she asked. "Tali didn't get a chance to do her voodoo bullshit."
"That's because Tali wasn't at the core to alter EDI. When I came to in that alley and then found out I was right next to the Normandy, I knew that something was manky about the whole thing. I figured Cerberus was involved, so's I commed Tali before I got back on board and asked her tae log into the terminal and see if she could find out anythin'."
"I got it. So you had hacked EDI before that?"
"Yeah, 'bout a week ago. Right after Kasumi got access. We already had the code changes all set up, so once we knew she could get in we just handed Kasumi an OSD and let 'er install it. There wasn't any reason to wait around, after all. We had it keyed into a trigger word that Tali or I could say. That word would execute the new code."
"And you didn't just have EDI run the code because...?"
He slid his hand onto her stomach, mirroring her position. "Remember, at the time we were still trying to be low-key. This was before Cerberus showed their hand. Kidnapping ye, trying to grab Shepard, all that shite."
"Yeah." She tried not to shiver, but she still could see in her mind's eye the cart full of cutting tools that the gray-suited bastard had shown her. Marcus must have felt her unease, because he patted her belly in a comforting manner.
"So what exactly did you do to EDI?" she asked.
"Ach, it's techie stuff, ye don't want to hear that."
She turned her head and kissed his shoulder. "Maybe I do. Just don't get too far into the weeds, okay?"
Donnelly shrugged. "There's all sorts of buffers that Cerberus set up in EDI to store commands. Certain commands get priority. What they did was to flag all of the 'TIMmy-says' orders with the same priority tag and then they stuck them all in one particular buffer. Our code went in and looked for those tags, then moved that buffer outside of EDI's core decision tree matrix. Which is a fancy way of sayin' that EDI doesn't have to follow Cerberus' orders anymore. She can make up her own mind."
"Nice. So you pretty much knew, going into that face-off with the cheerleader, that Cerberus was up to something. But you already had their main weapon taken away."
"It was something like that," said Marcus.
Jack thought about it. "You didn't actually have to confront her. I heard that She-Bitch pointed a gun at you towards the end there."
"Yeah, well, I wanted to give her at least one chance to come clean. And I knew she wouldn't really shoot me."
"Still a big fucking risk, dude." Jack slid her hand further down his stomach, then even lower. She trailed her fingers down along the length of his cock, then cupped his balls. She gave them a gentle fondle.
"Well whaddya know," she said. "They really are made of brass."