88. Anniversaries

“Hard day?”

Isaac didn’t move from where he’d flopped onto the couch, enjoying the perfect softness of the cushions as he stared up at the chandelier and draping curtains with mild interest. He snorted.

“Yeah, you could call it that.” The words came out much more weary than he intended. Isaac rubbed his eyes, beginning to feel the effects of his poor night’s sleep. It was easy to ignore when he’d been sitting in front of the grave, surrounded by flowers and the cool wind. But in the stillness of Lilith’s place, crowded with furniture and accessories, it hit full force.

Isaac shifted on the couch, rolling over so that he could stare sideways over at Lilith sitting on one of the armchairs across the room. She was delicately sipping a cup of steaming tea. Isaac’s own cup lay on the table, too far away for him to bother reaching for.

“Well, at least the most difficult part is over,” Lilith said lightly. She waved her hand, and the cup on the table began to glow softly. The porcelain trembled, clattering on the table before it rose into the air and steadily drifted over to where Isaac was, positioning itself right in front of his nose. He stared at it for a few seconds, and when it made no move to drift away, he finally sighed and dragged himself up, grabbed the cup, and took a sip. He didn’t really process its flavor, but he did feel its warmth. He relaxed slightly.

Isaac had spent much longer in the graveyard than he’d intended. By the time the words stopped pouring out and it felt like he’d said everything there was to say, the cold had crept through the ground and settled in his bones and the sky was beginning to darken.

His muscles had felt stiff when he pulled himself up. At some point his legs had fallen asleep, and he took a second to simply walk around in small circles to try and get the feeling back in them.

Most of the other graveyard visitors had left by then, he noted. There were only a few stragglers left, and Isaac wondered exactly how much time had passed. He stretched and briefly considered returning to his apartment, but the idea hadn’t appealed to him. It didn’t feel right to face those grey walls again so soon afterwards. Not when he’d just become accustomed to the vibrant blooms, when he still felt the crisp fullness of the air in his lungs.

And so, he’d turned and headed towards the subway station without glancing back. It had surprised him, how easy it felt to walk away from the graveyard. There was still a lingering pull, but it was closer to a light tug than to a heavy weight. He was going to go back, after all. He wouldn’t stay away forever.

That brought Isaac back to the Underside. The moment the subway train had shifted and the car cleared out of other passengers, he’d released a sigh and relaxed into the plastic seat. It felt like ages since he’d been back, even if logically he knew it wasn’t that long ago and he’d very recently spent consecutive days there.

The rising golden lights of the Golden Lands had felt comforting in their constancy, and sitting there on the ornate couch surrounded by the signature excessive decorations of Lilith’s home, Isaac didn’t regret his decision to go there instead of back to 108th street.

Isaac studied Lilith, who was finishing off her own drink. There was still some of that weariness he’d seen the last time they’d talked, he thought. Her movements lacked her usual energy. He frowned.

“Hey, Lilith, you can give me some jobs again, you know.”

The woman raised an eyebrow. “Why, Isaac dear, I thought you’d never ask. Literally.” She chuckled and shifted in her seat. “Well, if you’re offering, there are quite a few stat updates piled up…”

Isaac snorted and shook his head. “Figures Fable wouldn’t do it.”

Lilith just hummed in response. She took another sip of her drink, only for the action to be interrupted by a jerking cough. Isaac nearly stood up, alarmed, but she raised a hand to stop him and took a longer sip of tea.

“Nothing to worry about, just went down the wrong pipe. My tea’s so wonderful I can’t help but drink too fast, you know?”

Isaac frowned, opening his mouth to respond, but the woman suddenly stood.

“Oh, that reminds me!” Her cup vanished in a shower of golden lights. “Wait right there,” she said, and without another word of explanation, she hurried away, ducking underneath a velvet curtain and vanishing from sight.

Isaac didn’t get much to question what was going on before she reappeared not even a minute later. Lilith was carrying a large white box with both hands. Isaac raised an eyebrow as she set it down on the table and smiled triumphantly.

Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

“Go on, open it!” she urged. Lilith looked genuinely giddy, the same sort of giddy she usually got when she had another one of her “brilliant” ideas. Amused, Isaac stood and carefully lifted off the lid, which was heavier than he was expecting. His eyes widened.

Sitting in the center of the box was a small cake. It was composed of three layers and covered in buttercream and flowers. Whoever had made it clearly hadn’t thought to add support for the layers, and the middle was sinking in on itself from the combined weight of the upper tiers. Said tiers were, themselves, slightly crooked, and the buttercream looked so thick that it was probably only one more whisk away from plain butter. That was probably the only thing keeping the flowers from falling off entirely, considering how questionable their placement was.

The most notable element of the cake, however, was on its very top tier. The rest of the cake was decorated in white buttercream, the flowers being the only sources of color. On this very top tier, however, an attempt had clearly been made to dye the buttercream, except the ratio of food coloring was so off that the colors were either only one shade away from off white or so vibrant that they made Isaac’s eyes burn.

That wasn’t even getting into what the decoration itself was. At first it looked like a muddy oblong, maybe an egg with a few too many shades in it, before Isaac recognized two murky dots already bleeding into the surrounding cream that were meant to be eyes. It was his face. A very poor, very distorted representation of his face as it would likely be envisioned by a toddler.

Isaac let out a noise that was halfway between a snort and a choking sound. He just managed to set the lid safely down on the table before he could no longer contain himself. Uneven, loud laughs mixed with snorts rang throughout the small room.

“Oh come now, it’s not that bad,” Lilith said. She frowned down at the cake. “I could’ve used magic, you know. You ought to be very grateful to have a god baking for you!”

Isaac didn’t respond at first, too busy trying to collect himself to form words.

“You shouldn’t have,” he finally said once the laughter had died down. He sat back down on the couch, stomach sore. He shook his head. “You really shouldn’t have.”

Lilith was silent for a few moments, sharp gaze studying him. Finally, she tilted her head to the side and smiled.

“Happy birthday, Isaac.”

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Isaac had just placed his hand on the doorknob when Lloyd called out. He paused. Normally he’d ignore him—such were the unspoken rules of the begrudging rhythm the two of them had settled into. Isaac would stop by the apartment to grab things, occasionally to eat some food, before slamming the door behind him and Lloyd would give him disappointed looks that eventually escalated into arguments that rang throughout the floor.

But that day, there had been a hesitancy in Lloyd’s voice that had made Isaac pause. Frowning, he turned his head slightly, but he kept his body facing forward.

“What?”

Lloyd shifted his weight, and he looked a lot like he had when Isaac had first stepped foot into the apartment, he thought. Uneasy, unsure. It was as unusual as it was refreshing.

His brother cleared his throat, straightening his shoulders back to his usual perfect posture, and Isaac felt himself scowl on pure reflex at the gesture.

“Your birthday’s coming up soon, right? I was thinking we could do something. There’s a restaurant near the edge of the city. I ate there once in college with some friends. It’s a little far, but it’s good.” He shifted his weight again, words slowing down as the man visibly tried to come up with more to say. “We’d just need to take the subway, and then after we cross the highway we’ll be there.”

Isaac just stared. He’d known his birthday was coming up, but he hadn’t thought much about it beyond mild awareness. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d done anything special for it, or if he’d ever really celebrated the day. He hadn’t thought Lloyd would remember.

He never cared before, said a sharp voice in his head. Never said a word.

The retort got stuck in his throat. Isaac just stared at Lloyd, standing there shifting his weight from one leg to another, and he couldn’t get the insult out.

Isaac swallowed, his own grip on the handle relaxing slightly.

His better judgment told him to step out and slam the door behind him. Ignore Lloyd and continue on with their usual uneasy balance of avoidance and semi confrontation.

Isaac’s eyes wandered over to the photos taped to the walls, the ones that still looked so unfamiliar to him. He then looked at Lloyd, still standing there, practically vibrating with nerves. He looked a lot younger like that, when his usual perfect posture was interrupted, unbalanced.

He wasn’t entirely sure what made him swallow down the sharp retort on the tip of his tongue. What made him turn around to face his brother entirely. He would wonder for years what would have happened if he’d simply left.

“Fine,” Isaac said. He cleared his throat and shifted his eyes over to the wall again. “I’ll, uh, see you then.”

He didn’t think about the way Lloyd’s eyes lit up and his shoulders slumped forward in relief. The man smiled. Standing there, he looked more like the Lloyd in the photos than Isaac had ever seen before. More like the Lloyd he’d caught glimpses of around their parents.

Even though he tried to shove it down, even though he attempted to ignore it, Isaac felt something warm bubble up in his chest.

“See you later,” Lloyd said.