35. Dusting and Decisions
The walk to Lilith’s house took about 8 or so minutes. There was never any real sound in the Golden Lands; the glowing lights made no noise, and though the flowers swayed as though swept by a breeze, no wind actually existed. It was a rare place of utter silence in the Underside, one that Isaac enjoyed as he stepped up to the door of Lilith’s house.
The outside of the building looked about as excessive as the inside. Layers and layers of moss and flowers cloaked the building’s walls, which were themselves made of a jumbled mix of bricks, each one a slightly different shade. The door was crafted out of thick, heavy wood, and it was engraved with flowering images of strange shapes and designs that Isaac couldn’t begin to make sense of.
Most curious of all, though, was the fact that the outside of the building definitely didn’t match the inside. There weren't the right number of windows, the spacing was off, and Isaac had also witnessed Lilith straight up add a new story onto the outside of the building that didn’t change the interior at all.
“Why, it’s for the aesthetic of course,” Lilith had said. “I do love these lavish mansions, but I wouldn’t know what to do with all those rooms!”
Shaking his head, Isaac raised his fist and knocked on the door four times. The Inferno knocking patterns were beginning to become a habit, it seemed. He frowned as he waited, but even after he knocked a second time, this time his usual three times, there was no response.
Odd. Lilith usually swung the door open before he was even done knocking, to “keep you on your toes!” as she’d say. His hand moved to the doorknob, which was more of a handle with the way it was shaped. It had a bunch of gears near its base that somehow allowed it to spin in more directions than it should be able to. The handle was gold, of course.
It took a second for Isaac to figure out what direction to turn the thing (it turned out to be diagonally to the bottom left), but once he did, he heard a click and the door opened easily, unlocked. Or maybe the weird handle was supposed to have been the lock. Isaac narrowed his eyes, but stepped through the doorway.
Lilith wasn’t anywhere near the entrance, but he hadn’t expected her to be. She almost exclusively hung out in the “tea room” at the end of the hallway, which he walked down without pause. The soft carpet sank below his shoes as he approached the area.
As he neared, however, he heard a cough. Isaac paused, slowing his steps. A second cough followed the first, harsher and rougher in sound. He frowned and carefully stepped into the room.
“Lilith?”
It took a moment for him to spot her, but the woman was standing in the corner of the room beside one of the shelves. In her hand she held a feather duster that was glowing faintly, though the light around it was already beginning to fade. The woman spun around.
“Oh, Isaac!” she said cheerily. “I was just doing some dusting. A god ought to keep her home tidy, you know!” To emphasize her point, she proceeded to swing the duster around in the least effective way possible.
Isaac studied her. She looked the same as usual. She was in one of her terrible hideous gowns, her smile was the same; nothing about her seemed visibly off. Satisfied, Isaac heaved a sigh and stepped forward, snatching the duster from the woman’s hands.
He wordlessly began to properly dust the shelves, which weren’t actually all that dusty. Maybe the weird smoky stuff that emanated from half of the jars kept the dust away. If he was a grain of dust, he definitely wouldn’t go anywhere near that shit.
You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author.
Lilith clapped dramatically and Isaac did his best to ignore her. “How reliable! Knowledgeable! Stupendous!”
Around the twelfth descriptor, Isaac gave up and shoved the duster back into Lilith’s hands. “I’m done.”
“Aw, I still had some more adjectives! You know, I never get the chance to use all this vocabulary, it’s really a shame.”
Isaac rolled his eyes. “Oh no,” he said in the most dull voice he could muster, doing his best impression of Mortimer. “What a travesty.” He continued before she could respond, otherwise he was certain this conversation would go on for another hour. “I didn’t find anything to help with the charisma thing.”
Lilith gasped. “Nothing at all? My high opinion of you is sinking!”
“Good.” He shook his head. “Casimir stole an egg from the Abyss, but I made him put it back, the Woodlands fey said all their unicorns or whatever died out after the Collapse, and Lucius said the survey questions were too vague, so I can’t do that either.” He walked across the room and plopped down on one of the couches with a sigh. “I really don’t think this charisma stat thing is gonna work.”
“What’s that one quote you humans say? Winner not a quitter?”
Isaac shot her a deadpan look. “I’ve never heard someone say that in my life.” He sunk deeper into the couch, enjoying the softness of the cushions. “Look, I can keep trying if you really want, but I seriously don’t think this is gonna work out.” He frowned. “Even Lucius said he didn’t think we needed another stat, and he’s like, actually smart.”
Isaac paused as he thought back to their conversation, which managed to feel like it was a long time ago despite literally having occurred on that same day. “Uh, I think he also wanted me to tell you something.” He scrunched his forehead in thought. “Something about not worrying about pleasing everyone? Then Casimir said changing the system wouldn’t change people’s opinion of you or something like that.”
There was no immediate reply, and the room was silent for a few moments. When Isaac glanced over at Lilith, the woman raised an eyebrow. “Well, I’m surprised the two of them were in the same room and not fighting,” she commented, ignoring the first half of what Isaac had said.
“They were playing cards. I’m 90% sure they’re actually friends.”
Lilith just hummed in response. She stepped over to a wooden chair a few feet away from the couch and sat down, sighing dramatically. “Goodness, there really is no pleasing anyone.”
“Being a god must be so difficult.”
“Incredibly difficult!” She turned to face Isaac, scrutinizing him with those oddly sharp golden eyes. “You look tired,” she commented.
He scowled. “Why does everyone keep saying that?”
Lilith just smiled. “Because it’s true.” She fell quiet again, and Isaac was beginning to feel unnerved with the lapses of silence when Lilith finally spoke again.
“Alright,” she said. Isaac blinked.
“Alright what?”
She chuckled. “I’ll scrap the charisma idea.”
“Oh.” That was… unexpected. Usually it took at least a week for Lilith to give up when she got a “brilliant” new idea. This was uncomfortably quick. Isaac stared down at the black screen of the tablet, where he could make out his faint, blurred reflection. Was it because of what Lucius had said, or did he look so dead inside that she’d decided to be kind? He wondered if he should thank her.
“—of course, someone needs to tell that one titan that I’m oh so very sorry about this, and seeing as I can’t leave the Golden Lands, I’ll leave that to you!”
Actually, never mind. He really shouldn’t be surprised at this point. This behavior was all too familiar, to the point that it was almost comforting. Isaac rolled his eyes, but moved to stand from the blissfully soft couch.
“Ah ah ah,” Lilith interrupted. “It’s really too embarrassing to tell them so soon after I agreed, wouldn’t you say, Isaac dear? Give it a week at the very least. I have a reputation to maintain!” She made a shooing motion with her hand. “Now hurry along now. I can’t have you falling asleep on my carpets!”
Isaac snorted and shook his head, but rose to his feet. When he turned, he saw that a fresh bouquet of flowers was sitting on the shelf, still glowing with the lingering magic from its creation. He glanced over at Lilith, who just nodded knowingly, and he carefully wrapped his fingers around the delicate stems.
“Careful on the way back!” Lilith called, waving dramatically and somehow not knocking anything around her over. Isaac rolled his eyes, but he waved back as he turned to leave.
“Yeah yeah, I will.”
As he exited the room and stepped down the hallway to the door, he held the flowers a little closer to his chest. They felt warm.