Lori texted me that I needed to be at her house immediately, and as if it would entice me, she mentioned that Lizzy was there. It was so urgent that I had to be woken up before seven in the morning mere days after I had returned. And no, Lizzy’s high energy so early in the morning wasn’t something I was exactly looking forward to dealing with. I was still getting used to sleeping in my own bed and next to my fiancée again. Speaking of, she groggily tried to pin me down with the arm that she flung over my chest.
“Whatever it is, it can wait.” Her voice came out muffled from the pillow and mess of red hair in desperate need of a brush.
“Sorry, honey, but the boss is summoning me.” I placed my hand over hers, making no effort to tackle the day or my obligations.
“Why did I just get you back and I'm already having to share you with other women?” I gently freed myself from her arm and patted the top of her hand. “I’m going to start hiring a legion of gigolos to make sure you know how it feels.”
“Because you love me and you love them. Not the gigolos, you’re not allowed to love them.” I leaned over and kissed the top of her head through her messy bedhead. “Do you want to come with me?”
“I don’t put on pants before eight in the morning,” she mumbled.
“You can wear your shorts. I don’t think they’d care. Back when I'd just met Lori, I saw her practically catatonic on her couch, unshowered, in shorts. I get the impression our friends would be fine with your pajama choice.” I put on a pair of jeans and started tying my shoes, struggling to really wake myself up. I focused on the laces, hoping they’d miraculously give me a jolt of energy instead of slipping through my slow, uncoordinated fingers.
“No, because then Lizzy will learn that I haven’t bothered shaving my legs.” She slowly sat up and rubbed her eyes. “She spent hours showing me how to shave and groom without hurting myself. I don’t want to make her mad when she sees I haven't done any of it. I could only listen to her explanations for so long when I just didn’t care about the appeal enough.”
“Eh, I don’t think she’d mind. You know Lizzy, she’s a pretty relaxed lady” I leaned over and kissed her. She sleepily giggled like a kid. “You and your hairy legs get back to sleep, okay? I’ll let you know when I’m on my way back.”
“Your legs are hairier than mine!” She lazily lobbed a pillow at my head before throwing herself back down on the bed, eyes already shutting.
“My beard is thicker than yours too.”
“I get why Lizzy says she hates men, specifically you. I changed my mind, I’m marrying her instead.” She barely opened her eyes, a peek of emerald shining through heavy eyelids. “Unless someone can promise me a homestead where I can have all sorts of weird animals and plants.”
“Lizzy has been rubbing off too much on you. You sure you’re not already married?” I stretched my arms above my head, popping my neck, back, and shoulders in the process.
“Okay, the weird animals and plants are her influence, but I do want a homestead. I can show my big, strong, handsome husband how to milk a cow and cut firewood.” Rebecca sighed happily. "You can do all the woodcutting shirtless. You know, for your benefit, so you don't overheat."
“Yeah, right, my benefit." I chuckled. "Where am I going to have the time to milk a cow when I have to earn money for that homestead? I’m not retiring until I’m over a hundred years old.”
“Take it from me, a hundred is when life starts to pick up and get fun.” She let out a loud breath and pulled the covers over her body. “Have fun with the girls, don’t do something that would get your sister to kill you. Or me.”
“You caught me. I was going to party it up before seven in the morning when I can barely tie my shoes.” I kissed her head one more time before trying to tiptoe downstairs. The silence and stillness in the house made me catch my breath for a moment. Letting out the held breath, I realized I was being silly. Shelly and Megan had no reason to be up quite as early as I did. Quickly, I scribbled down where I was going and who I’d be so they wouldn’t worry about my whereabouts. I promised to tell the kiddo I’d let her know whenever I left, and I intended to keep that promise.
It wasn’t hard to find Lori’s house given the efficient layout of our little community. It felt weird to me to stand outside of a lady’s house with the sun barely peeking over the horizon. It felt like something I’d do to confess my undying and eternal love for a woman, but that woman was back in my bed, drooling on a pillowcase. I checked my phone and the number on the door, making sure they matched three times before it flung open and Lizzy was there with an exasperated look on her face.
“You know you can just knock on the door, right? Do they not have knocking on doors on your fancy alien planets?”
“It’s early and...wait, what are you doing here?”
“This is my house, dummy.” She rolled her eyes before the lightbulb went off. “Oh! You haven’t been here before. Okay, you’re only a half-dummy. I'll let it slide this time.”
“Sorry for the mess.” Lori poked her head around Lizzy. “She said it would be easier if I texted you and told you it was my house. I've given up trying to figure out what goes on in this girl's head. I'd have better luck getting a degree in astrophysics in a year.”
“What? How does that make it easier?” I stared at Lizzy, feeling the beginning of the kind of headache I never got when I was on Clamor. Lizzy was dressed in a black sports bra and some matching yoga pants, so it looked like she was about ready to bolt past me to go on a run around the neighborhood. “And why do you look like you’re about to go for a run at the crack of dawn?”
“She’s been working out for over an hour now.” Lori had dark circles under her brown eyes. She waved me inside from behind Lizzy. “Come on in, you can join in for the worst part of a sleepover. The part where everyone wakes up way too early and the host takes everything over.”
“Those pillow fights you mentioned?” I squeezed by Lizzy who shut the door behind me.
“Ah, bad luck, you just missed the lingerie pillow fight.” Lizzy patted my shoulder and sighed. “The best one we’ve had yet. Lizzy had a titty pop out. We added strip rules to it. Better luck next time.”
“Oh no, what will I do? How will I go on? Poor me.” Right when I was about to compliment her home, a large dog ran up to me, excitedly got on their back legs, and pawed me directly in an area that had me talking a few octaves higher. I groaned and leaned forward, seeing future visions of having kids going right down the drain along with my dignity in perhaps one of the worst ways to ever start a morning. “Yep, poor me.”
“Russ, no! Bad boy, no punching.” Lizzy tried her best to scold the dog, but I could tell she was having trouble keeping a straight face. At least there was genuine concern behind the mischief in her eyes. “I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”
When the vocal reply was a mix between a wheeze, a croak, and a groan, I just went with giving her a thumbs-up. Even Russ looked like he felt a little bad about the whole thing. I wasn’t familiar with dog breeds, but he was a beauty. Maybe a German shepherd or a dog like it. He belonged on all sorts of magazine covers and pamphlets that tried to sell someone on the benefits of adopting a dog. He was handsome enough that I let it slide.
“Why am I here?” I finally choked out. “It better not have been to just meet Russ and get his friendly greeting. If it was, you’ll have to explain to Rebecca why she won’t have her dream of twenty kids running around.”
“I actually have a huge favor to ask you.” Lizzy was sheepish, throwing a glance at her dog. Her nervous smile made her scar scrunch. “I was hoping you would help me out with a certain Anomaly-related task.”
“Need me to fight Braden or Julio with my new skills?” I tried to flex, but moving sent a small wave of nausea through me.
“No, and if you need a bucket, please let me know before hurling on my carpet, thanks.” She placed one foot on a balance beam that sat right in the middle of her living room, standing maybe three feet above the floor. Carefully, with her arms out to her side, she stepped on it and slowly began walking across. “Your sister found two nasty villains out near Las Vegas. They’re terrorizing the city and the surrounding area, robbing people, gas stations, and casinos. Well, since they’re doing all that, I guess your sister didn’t find them. That’s like saying you found a hurricane.”
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“Has anyone been hurt?” The pain was subsiding enough that I was able to sit down without getting sick. I wanted to ask why she just had a balance beam in the same place most people would have a coffee table. Realizing it was Lizzy and her answer would probably be weird, I elected to save the question for later.
Lizzy looked straight ahead, focusing on her balancing act, taking great care to put one foot in front of the other without taking a tumble. “Hurt? Yes. Killed? Not yet, thank goodness. We don’t know if they’re in with McLeod and his gang, but they’re accruing a lot of money and valuables. They’re not shy about exposing their identities and McLeod has to get money somehow, right? Given his face is plastered all over the world as the single biggest threat to our entire species, he isn’t exactly working the day shift at the local farmer’s market. That’s why we think they might be connected.”
I could start to see where it was going. “You want me to help you and your team catch them.”
“Yes and no. I’ll be there, so lucky you. This is going to be smaller than other tasks. Braden and Rosie won’t be joining us.”
That surprised me. I thought she was asking me to go more as some backup than anything else. Her team was comprised of some pretty heavy hitters. Given Lizzy's odd charisma, I imagined her team would do anything she asked them to do.
“Before you ask, Rosie is visiting family in Texas and Braden...” She put her hands at her side for a moment, taking a moment to pause and break her concentration. “Braden has a complicated relationship with his family. His older sister is essentially a prodigy and good at everything she does. He’s a sweetheart, but you’ve seen him, he’s not the most confident guy in the world. His parents...didn’t like how far behind his sister he was. They really didn’t like it.”
“Ah man, I can guess some of this.” My heart sank thinking about the guy. I braced myself for Lizzy to finish the tale with a tragedy.
“From what he tells me, he got along well with his sister growing up. Regular sibling bickering and love. Still, she never really did much to help him. Maybe she didn’t know how bad things were for him, I’m not sure. One night, his dad had a bit too much to drink on the day that Braden brought home a grade that wasn’t quite up to standard. Already having dealt with the abuse before, he tried to protect himself. You know how Anomalies typically first manifest, so of course, that’s when a shadow blade stabbed his dad in the leg. When he saw the blood and heard the screams, he left and never went back. No pun intended, he lived in the shadows for months, just getting by on scraps until Luna found him and gave him a proper home.”
I was scared to ask, but I had to know. “What happened to his dad?”
“Oh, him? Perfectly fine, sadly. A few stitches and he was all set. I don’t know how they dealt with the police, especially since they had a runaway on their hands. I guess with the abuse, his family decided it wasn’t worth pursuing more, and sometimes the police don’t follow through when they should.” She frowned and clenched her jaw. “I hate what they did to him. I’m skeptical that his sister didn’t know what was happening. Regardless, he’s trying to reconnect with her and start a new relationship. Now that he’s safe and in control of his own life, he thought it was time, so I’m not asking him to do anything that would get in the way of that.”
“That’s nice of both of you.” She looked at me like I had the gall to think she ever wasn’t nice. “But why me? If you’ve been sitting on this, why not ask Val or Alex? They’re great muscle. Literally.”
“Because I like you more than them. That’s a silly question. Val is still adjusting and Alex is a dick.” Lizzy tossed a glance at the barely-awake Lori. “No offense.”
“None taken, he broke my best friend’s door. He can be a bit of a dick sometimes.” She waved the almost-insult away, not caring much about defending her boyfriend.
“Right, thanks. I think.” I furrowed my brow and crossed my arms. “Well, you’re basically family now, so you know I’m not going to turn you down. What do we know about them?”
“Robert and Francine Anderson, a real nice husband and wife crime duo. Bonnie and Clyde without the killing or glamorization, thank goodness. Robert can manipulate things like sand and dirt to make glass, and can then control that glass to act as a weapon, mirror, or whatever you can imagine can be done with glass. And no, before you ask, I do not know how he actually makes the glass or the science behind it.”
“Glass is dangerous,” I said stupidly, nodding my head. Lizzy didn’t pay the comment much mind.
“Yeah, that’s only part of it. Francine can ‘hide’ in and emerge from any glass she’s touching. Her needing to be so close is an advantage, but once she’s in, it’s a different ballgame.” Lizzy’s face tightened, but I couldn’t tell if it was from the evil duo or from keeping her balance on the narrow surface. “Believe it or not, she's the one that does most of the damage. She can punch, kick, or stab from any direction with Robert manipulating the glass. People will be scared stiff at a jagged shard the size of their heads being pointed at them, right? No one expects being stabbed in the back of the leg from a little mirror on the ground.”
“She can bring objects with her into her weird glass world?” I tried to imagine how the power worked. Creativity with Anomalies wasn’t my strong suit. Trying to put the pieces together in my head wasn’t going too well.
“Well, she hasn’t popped back out naked as far as I know, so I take that as a yes, as fun of a take on a stripper popping out of a birthday cake that may be.” Lizzy took a deep breath. “Your power’s versatility will be a better help than Alex’s, I think. For as proud as that guy is, and as good in a brawl he would be, he can’t make a full suit of armor that can protect him from every angle or a billion weapons that can attack from anywhere. Val doesn’t have her armor either, putting her at a disadvantage. Outside of those two, you’re the strongest guy I know, so I think you’ll be a good fit for this. We’ll have Julio with us too.”
“Sure, I’m in.” It wasn’t really confidence that made me agree without a second thought. It felt more like a calm sense of duty. The two of them terrorizing an entire area was bad enough, but possibly financing McLeod’s operations made them enemies we couldn’t ignore. “What’s the plan?”
“Teleportation is out,” she began. “Everyone who could make us teleportation stones is either busy out east helping with Luna’s other issues there or they aren’t with us anymore. There are also some concerns that McLeod can somehow track us when we teleport, so almost everyone has been planning everything with a lot of caution. That means it’ll be a lot like how you found your lovely fiancée! Using tools and dumb luck, or we just find them in the act of a crime. They seem pretty career-motivated, so I don’t think it’ll be hard. I’ll do some digging to find what I think would be their likeliest targets in the area.”
“Are we going to kill them?”
“Straight to the very morose point,” she muttered. “Look, we’ll do what we have to in order to protect ourselves and the people around us, but that’s not what we’re going for. We’re there to stop them and, ideally, get information from them. Being alive is preferred for gathering information, in case you needed the reminder.”
“Makes sense and sounds reasonable. When do we leave?”
Lizzy opened her mouth to respond, turning her head to face me and shifting her body weight. She started to fall, and when she went to stop herself, she must have overcorrected somehow. I don’t know it ended up happening, but she ended up slipping with both feet going on either side of the beam. The beam and gravity teamed up to give the poor lady a horrible shot right between the legs. Her eyes just went wide and she groaned through clenched teeth, not even attempting to get off the balance beam.
I grimaced and covered my mouth. At least when the dog hit me, I wasn’t going down with my entire body weight working against me. “Oh man, are you okay?” I tried to see if there was anything I could do, but she just waved me off, still not daring to move most of her body.
“I just fell directly on a balance beam going cooch-first. Look at what I’m wearing. Look at these yoga pants. Do you think this protected me at all? No, these things are only good for making my ass look amazing, not protecting my vag.” Lizzy sounded like she was about to puke, her voice barely more than a squeak. Managing to lean forward, she pressed her forehead against the balance beam, desperately sucking in air.
“Should I call an ambulance or something?” I looked over at Lori, who shared a pained look on her face. She just shrugged, probably not sure how serious the injury was. With different tools downstairs, I had no idea either. “Do you think you broke anything?”
Lizzy tried to sigh, but it came out as a wheeze. “I know that you’re a guy, so you might not get it, but it’s not like I can ‘break’ my-”
“I meant your pelvis or if you did damage to a hip on the fall.” My face went red and I had to hold back a laugh. “I didn’t do that bad in anatomy, jeez. You’re not, like, paralyzed, are you?”
She just shook her head, struggling to smile back. “I don't think I did any serious damage, but I learned that this is a lot less funny when it happens to girls in real life than guys in movies. Don’t listen to the people who say nothing bad happens to the beautiful and kind.”
“Well, at least your ego wasn’t damaged,” I said. Lizzy tried to get up, only managing to stumble and nearly make things worse. I was able to catch her and throw an arm around her shoulder before she could spill onto the floor. The smell of someone who’d been working out hit my wrinkling nose. “Girl, you need a shower.”
“How are you engaged to a living, breathing woman? It’s like every word that comes out of your mouth makes me want to strangle you and have my dog punch you in the dick some more.” When she sat down on the couch, she lifted her arm up and sniffed. A disgusted grimace followed. “Okay, fine, you’re right in this one instance. You’re still the worst guy I know.”
“I know, I know. Look at it this way, at least-” The piercing sound of my phone cut me off and jolted Lori into sitting up straight. I didn’t recognize the number, but I didn’t get many phone calls in general. My gut told me that it wasn’t a call I would want to send to voicemail. I hit the little green button and put it up to my ear. “Hello?”
“Good morning, Ethan Harper. I told you that I’d be able to find out who you are, didn’t I?”