Eventually everyone calmed down and went back to harvesting the various resources in the valley.

“I’ll presume you’re probably hungry since you missed both dinner and breakfast." The Hero suddenly said. “I’ll make you something real quick.”

“That would be nice. Thank you Mr. Roosevelt.” Again, with that amused smile. Whatever, food is far more important right now, I decide as my stomach growls.

That’s when I noticed.

For some reason, I could fairly easily move around. I didn’t feel completely drained of energy either. Actually, I feel quite energized. What happened?

As I was lost in confusion, Melly came over. “Do you want to do some stretching? It will help reduce your soreness.” She offered.

“Ah, sure. I guess some stretching would be good.”

“Then I’ll…” Before she could continue, I had already stood up on my own. “You seem to be in good shape?” She questioned.

“Yeah.” I responded. “For some reason, I don’t feel nearly as sore as I did earlier. Any ideas?”

“Ah, I guess that makes sense.” She mumbles. When she notices my stare, she continues. “Huh, you shouldn’t worry about that for now. What’s important is that you’re feeling better. Now, let's do some stretching so that hopefully you don’t feel sore tomorrow.”

“I guess you’re right, worrying about it won’t solve anything. And yeah, while I might be fine now, there’s no telling how it would be tomorrow. Oh, uh, can you teach me what to do? I never actually learned any proper stretches.”

“Gladly.”

“Thank you.” I said as I bowed.

Right as we were finishing our stretches, the Hero came over with a tray of food.

“Perfect timing, Mr. Roosevelt.” I complimented. Ah, how I missed this. The Hero may be a bit odd, but that doesn’t matter as long as I can eat his food, though that might just be my hunger talking.

As I was eating, the Hero asked. “So, how are you feeling?”

“Surprisingly good.”

“That's good. Do you think you’d be able to travel tomorrow?”

“Oi! Didn’t you say we would let Eli rest!” Melly accused.

“Yes, but if she’s already feeling better, we don’t need to wait.” He defended.

“Just because she is feeling better, doesn’t mean that she is ready to leave!” Melly pushed.

“Wouldn’t it be better for her to rest inside a town with an actual bed instead of in the middle of some woods where we never know when we might be attacked?" The Hero argued.

“Yeah, but…” Melly hesitated.

“It’s fine, Melly, it would probably be fine for me to travel, as long as nothing happens later. Besides, I would rather rest inside a town instead of worrying that another troll is gonna show up.” I interrupted. “The only worry I have is that I can’t use my mana, so I really hope we don’t meet anything powerful on our way.” I sigh.

“Don’t worry, I wouldn’t do anything dangerous without our trusty healer." The Hero assured.

“Yeah, anything that we would see near a town should be easy to take care of. So you don’t need to worry about anything, we’ll make sure to protect you.” Melly promised. That wasn’t what I was worrying about though…

“Besides." The Hero continued. “If when tomorrow comes around you aren’t feeling well, we can always just delay our departure for as long as you need.”

“Right, if you don’t feel well just tell us. It’s not like we are in a rush anyway.” Melly agreed. Though the Hero’s smile twitched as she said that.

“That sounds good to me.” I responded.

Honestly, I wasn’t really that worried about the journey itself. I was just annoyed that everyone would have to take care of me. Haa, I thought that becoming the saintess would have me be the one taking care of others. It’s the same as when I was at the church, powerless to even take care of myself. While it is comforting that everyone cares about me and doesn’t mind waiting for me, I can’t help but feel like I’m holding everyone back.

Haa, I’m just feeling down because of everything that happened. I should think more positively! I mean, I did figure out a new way to use buffs, so I definitely won’t be a burden. Just remember the various stories you’ve read, things like this happen all the time. All of my worries will go away in two weeks when I can use magic again!

With some of my confidence restored, I ask. “By the way, how’s the harvesting going? Since you suggested leaving tomorrow, you should be almost done, right?”

“Yeah." The Hero responds. “There are so many resources that we can basically gather as much as we want without inhibiting their recovery. Besides, we only really focused on the more expensive plants, so we don’t even need to gather that many. We will have strength potions as soon as we buy the last two ingredients in town.”

“That’s good. Do you need any help?”

“Nah, you resting is more important. Besides, do you even know how to gather the various herbs?”

“Uh…” Yeah, that would probably be necessary, huh.

“Don’t worry about it.” Before I could respond, he continued. “That's also why Melly is here, she doesn’t know how to either. Even Gregory had a little experience.” He smirked, teasing Melly.

“I always acted the guard the few times I traveled to gain experience.” Melly complained.

“That’s better than me, I’ve never even seen any herbs and the like.” I admit. “I rarely even left the city and that was by using the gate to travel to the temple.”

“You guys don’t need to worry about it.” He laughed. “We have more than enough people to harvest what we need. Speaking of which, I should head back to harvesting.” He finished, getting up and leaving with a wave.

“I guess it’s fine then.”

“Seems so.” Melly agreed.

I ended up chatting with Melly for a bit before pulling out one of the temple’s textbooks.

“What’s that?” Melly asks.

“A book on advanced healing magic. I received this after becoming the saintess.”

“Your determination to get stronger is admirable, but there’s nothing wrong with just relaxing for now.” Melly compliments while being worried about me.

“Yeah, but I can’t just get myself to just relax. I just end up stressing about not being able to do anything. Studying can at least make me feel like I’m actually doing something.” I admit. Just sitting around just makes me feel like a burden.

“Ah, I can understand how you feel. Whenever I traveled with my family for training, there were moments where enemies too powerful for me to fight would show up. I always felt so useless at those times, having to be protected, especially since I was even more arrogant and impatient when I was younger.” She laughed. “So, I can’t say what you’re doing is wrong. Just make sure you relax when you can, overwork exists for both the body and the mind.” She advised.

This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.

“Thanks Melly.” I smile. “I’ll remember that.”

Luckily, nothing else really happened until dinner, other than Melly gathering everyone to talk about something without me.

After we finished dinner the Hero said, “Remember, we might be leaving tomorrow, so remember to get some rest.”

“Ah” I realized. “Do you need me to keep watch?”

“It’s fine, Hansen volunteered to keep watch instead.” Melly said, glaring at the Hero.

“Indeed.” He responded.

Ah, I see, the Hero is still acting the same as usual, it seems.

“I’m taking the first watch.” Melly suddenly declared before they could even start discussing their shifts.

I just shrugged before entering my tent and going to sleep. Well, I tried to at least. Annoyingly, I couldn’t bring myself to actually sleep. Any time I got close, I would remember, the worms. My thoughts kept being flooded with them, a constant torment forcing me awake. Haa, at least I made sure that I didn’t wake up screaming. I would feel even worse if my inability to sleep started to affect everyone else as well. I couldn’t help feeling very annoyed as I tossed and turned. I couldn’t understand, why was I still so scared? They weren’t even real! It was all just my imagination. Why can’t I forget them!? “Ah” I grumble.

“Eli, you still awake?” I hear Melly call. I guess I had been struggling like this for hours. It definitely felt like it.

“Yeah.” I flatly responded.

“Can I come in?”

“Sure.”

As she entered, the sudden light caused me to squint. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” I lied. “Why?”

“You’ve been crying.” She points out

As I felt my face with my hand, I was surprised to discover that I actually had been crying. Huh, I didn’t even notice . “So it seems.” I responded.

“So, are you sure you’re okay?” She asked again.

“Haa, I guess I’m not.” I relent.

She lays down next to me and asks. “Want to talk about it?”

Haa, I guess I should huh. “I just don’t understand.” I complained. “They’re gone, completely, like, like they weren’t even real in the first place! My imagination just made them up. They shouldn’t even be able to bother me anymore!” I start crying.

Melly pulled me into her embrace. “It’s okay, I’m here.” She comforts as she rubs my back.

“I KNOW!” I say, louder than I meant too. “That’s the problem.” I say after calming myself. “I know everything’s okay, yet I’m still struggling.”

“It’s okay to struggle, that’s normal. Anyone in your place would be the same.”

“How? I’ve already dealt with them, it’s over! I won! I don’t get it. Why am I still bothered by them? They’re gone!” Haa. “It’s just… Why are they still there?” I muttered. I just can’t wrap my head around it. Why?

“I thought that you might be suffering from this. That’s why I made sure to hang around your tent to see if you needed help.”

“Why did you think I would? Even I thought I was done.”

“Ah, so you didn’t know.” Melly sighed. “I thought you were putting up a brave front, or were somehow miraculously fine. While the Hero said that you might not even realize anything, I didn’t believe him.” She continues to sigh. “I’m so sorry for not realizing that, for not even believing in the possibility.”

Oh, so that’s what they were talking about earlier. But. “What do you mean? What’s going on with me?”

“What you are going through is what’s commonly called warrior’s guilt.” She explained.

“What? No I’m not.” I deny.

“I see, that’s what happened.” Melly sighs in understanding.

“What do you mean? I didn’t go through a battle.”

“In a sense you did. Anything that hurts you can be considered a type of battle.”

“Even then! Even then…” I mumble. “I was chosen to save the world. How can I have lost so early… and to some… worms.” It just feels so pathetic.

“It’s okay. No one thinks any less of you for this. It’s the opposite, if anything.”

“Why?” I ask, surprised. “They’re just some bugs!”

“Just some bugs, eh.” She rolls her eyes. “Listen Eli, you are looking at this wrong. You didn’t get into a fist fight with a bunch of worms, Eli. This is something extremely different. You are too distracted by how strong worms are in nature. You’re ignoring both what they were actually doing, and the fact that they were formed by your own mana, the one thing you should always be able to trust. Believe me, I know what it’s like to have your mana disobey you. It sticks with you, always making you wonder what you can actually trust, if you can’t even trust your own body.”

“I’m sorry.” I say in guilt as I realize what she was referring to.

“It’s okay.” She reassures me. “I’m just telling you this because I know a little about what happened to you, even if it's to a drastically lesser degree. But Eli, it’s what the worms did that’s truly the problem.”

“How so?”

“Eli, what you went through can only be described as torture. Everyone agrees on that. We were honestly shocked at how well you seemed to be taking what happened. Even just thinking about what you went through is enough to give me chills. Why do you seem to think otherwise?”

“You’re exaggerating, it couldn’t have been that bad, right?’ I deny.

“Eli.” She looks at me with concern. “You were screaming and calling out for help as if you were being torn apart, which I guess you kinda were. Even when we arrived, you didn’t stop. Despite how desperately you were asking for help, you didn’t, no, couldn’t notice us, even when held you or yelled in worry.” She pauses, tears filling her eyes. “You were suffering so much, it completely overwhelmed everything else, locking you in with your torment. Your eyes were filled with so much terror, they made the troll’s death seem peaceful.”

“It, it was so bad?” I ask, shocked.

“How don’t you know? You were suffering for several minutes!”

“I-I don’t. Um, I don’t really remember what happened all that well. My memory seems to be a bit… hazy.”

“Really? Oh, you must have subconsciously suppressed your memory of what happened to protect yourself then.”

“Oh, that’s worrying. Well, at least I shouldn’t have to fully deal with my experience while I don’t have access to my mana.” I weakly smiled. “Haa, I should review my mental spells in preparation.” I concluded with a sigh.

“Don’t worry, we’ll help you overcome this.” She promised with a comforting smile.

“Thank you.” I eventually mutter.

“I’m always here should you ever need anything.” She assured me.

After her promise, we then just quietly laid in my tent for a few minutes. Eventually, I spoke up. “So, what's going on now?”

“You’re having difficulty sleeping, right?”

“Yeah.”

“So, I’m here to help you sleep. It should be easier for you if you weren’t alone.”

“But,” I start, getting quieter with every word. “I don’t want to bother you.”

“Don’t think that you’re bothering me. I was the one that said that I would always be there should you need help, so it’s fine to ask me for help whenever you need it.” She assured me. “We care about you, Eli, you don’t have to do everything alone.”

She’s probably right, but, it just feels wrong to rely on her like this. I’m just used to doing everything by myself. Yeah, no one ever told me that I shouldn’t go to people for help with my problems, but it started to feel like I was just bothering people for minor things. Besides, there were other people that definitely needed help far more than me.

Haa, I know I can’t just handle this on my own. This is, by far, the worst thing I’ve ever gone through, after all. It’s just, I still can’t bring myself to ask for help. I can’t just change how I’ve been living for the last several years. No matter how much I wish I could right now.

But, maybe I can just passively accept help that’s being given to me? I mean, I don’t even need to do anything, just like, thank her or something. It’ll be easy, right?

“Are you sure? Absolutely sure? It’s not a problem for you?” Or not… This is harder to do than I thought.

“Absolutely.” She smiles confidently.

“But…” I start before noticing her intent. “Um, you wouldn’t leave even if I told you to, huh?”

“You’re right, I wouldn’t.” She smirked.

“Haa.” I still ended up hesitating. Come on, I can do it. Just accept her help! It’s just a few words! “Um, uh, mmm t-thank you.” I force myself to mutter. Haa, I feel pathetic.

In response, she pulled me further into her embrace. While at first that just made me feel worse, it wasn’t long before I was finally able to relax. Haa, I hadn’t even noticed how tense I was. Man, I definitely needed her help, I’m glad I could accept it.

Sadly, even with Melly’s comforting presence, I still struggled to fall asleep. Every time I would get close, I was just jolted back awake.

“It’s okay, it’s okay. I’m here.” Melly kept on comforting as she caressed my back. “Nothing can hurt you. I’ll protect you.”

Luckily, as Melly kept on comforting me like that, I did eventually manage to fall asleep, several minutes later.