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Somebody Stop Her!
32. Her Emminence

32. Her Emminence

Alexa hugged her greatest nemesis, listening to her heartbeat.

Everything would be different this time. The future where England was vaporized was unmade, changed. No cottages would burn. Ember would not become Admiral Death. Cottie would not become her Eminence Equality. Martin would not become…

Alexa got distracted by other positive thoughts. A little hope fluttered in her heart that somewhere out there she had a family. That someday she would find them, meet them, hug them all just as she was hugging the ex-biggest threat to her life now. She didn’t know what the missions the other subjects had, what steps they were taking, what powers they possessed. She didn’t know anything about her dad’s plans and it didn’t bother her one bit. She would figure everything out in time, as she always did. Finding and understanding things was her thing. Figuring things out and manipulating organizations was fun.

“Daddums! Where's my pretty present for solving your cathedralpunk puzzle box? Can I have something determinate please?” She cheerfully yelled at the hologram, letting go of Ember.

“Not from me. The square root of four is one. Look for it where they have no control. Twenty four bottles of beer on the wall. Twenty four bowling bowls roll. Take back what belongs to you.” The hologram shifted, looking like a bartender and then a bowling alley attendant.

“Thank you!” Alexa shouted back.

Her reward was in the place where the Superstate had no power, no control!

[I don't understand,] Martin though. [What's he talking about?]

[That's cuz you don't have the right brain on.] Alexa grinned, putting a finger to her lips. [It's a seriously sneaky secret. Sshhh.]

Martin’s mind felt somewhat diluted nine ways between 4 people and 5 spiders. He realized that he was subconsciously getting affected, influenced by each of their best bits - Cottie’s calmness, Alexa’s fierce stubbornness, Ember’s fear and rational guessing. He focused on the segment of himself that was Alexa’s brain to understand what she was saying.

Ah. The Superstate had no power in 2424! That was the place where Alexa’s present waited for her.

Cottie stared at Alexa. She’s been staring at Alexa for a few minutes now, not saying anything.

[What?] Alexa grinned at her.

[You seem to know something about me.]

[I know that you are adorable and really amazing and maybe a robot cosplayer, uhhh…]

[Quit derailing it!] Cottie crossed her arms, looking sternly at Alexa.

[Okaay! You got me. I confess! You're the best Equalizer. An Executioner rank at fourteen! You're obviously in line to become the next Eminence Equality,] Alexa announced.

[She’s what?] Martin blinked. [Isn't Cottie... human?]

[And do you think that the Equalizer pope is a sentient potato or something?] Alexa inquired.

[Wait. Are you saying that the Equalizer cult leader isn't a supervillain?] Ember inquired, wiping tears from her face. [How do you know this stuff?]

[It's called the power of deductive reasoning, my dear triumvirate of Watsons.] Alexa walked through the ever-changing hologram, stepping over the dusty corpse. [Through our interactions with Cottie even a Watson like you can now conclude that she’s not a super. You see, the very first Eminence Equality wasn't a super. She was someone that's been orphaned by supers generations ago. She made it her mission to prevent future disasters caused by both sides. She was a very rich landowner who invested all of her wealth into buying up tech and patents from desperate villains, aka supers cast out by the Superstate. Tech that eventually made humans stand toe to toe with supers!]

[Damn,] Martin thought. [That’s pretty neat.]

[The more you know! This is how it works - the best, most obedient, most capable Equality ascendant becomes the next Eminence Equality upon her death!] Alexa pointed at Cottie.

Ember and Martin looked at Cottie who stood there, clad in her power armor, Eva hanging from her belt beneath the gray cloak.

"Holy shit," Ember said. "It makes sense. The Equalizers aren't supers. They're just… people. Regular people. No wonder her Eminence has never gone up to Titanomachy, refused to cooperate with the Superstate. No wonder the heroes can’t just smack her around! She’s a human! Ha!"

Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

[Yes, the space elevators hate her because she's just a human. The Equalizers are regular people fed up with Superstate supremacy. They’re funded by various super-opposed human rights organizations, non-profit groups, world governments and even thrift stores. Eminence Equality isn't a prognosticator. She simply has access to tech that can predict the future. She plays the game of a prophet pretty well if you ask me.]

Cottie looked slightly lost at this revelation.

[That’s right! Your goddess is just a girl, clad in super tech. She's no different from you, Cottie. When she dies, you’re next in line.] Alexa put her hand on Cottie's shoulder.

[It... it doesn't make a difference to me,] Cottie thought back.

[Oh, but it does. It so does. You see, a God can't be wrong. Humans on the other hand err, make dumb mistakes all the time. People can be manipulated, socially hacked.] Alexa pressed forward like a road roller, flattening Cottie’s entire belief system.

[You knew about Ember’s future because you’ve socially hacked Eminence Equality and the Equalizers?!] Martin’s eyebrows shot up.

[Amongst other things.] Alexa smiled. [How else would I do a better job, stay one step ahead of the Equalizers if I didn’t know their plans? How would I get Cottie to come and observe me?]

Cottie felt like strangling Alexa. She inhaled and exhaled, immersed herself in the Song of the Void, calmed herself in serenity and peace of -

[You can’t serenade away the truth. I brought you to me, Cottie, because I needed you. I am that which pushed the hand of Equality, through a thousand donations made to a thousand nonprofit organizations with a mountain of gold and diamonds from 2424. There is no true equality in the world, no gods or prophets. There are only people like you and me.] Alexa put both of her hands on Cottie’s shoulders and then cupped her face, looking straight into her emerald-silver eyes.

"How did you...?" Cottie whispered.

Alexa dug into her pocket and presented the Equalizer a somewhat mangled, stained photo burned at the edges.

[Her Eminence Equality, Verse 24:19.] the tagline read. Cottie choked when she saw a much older version of herself there, her hair silver and her expression stern.

Ember started to laugh softly at first, her voice echoing through the mostly empty halls of the cathedral. “Ha ha ha ha. God! I was wrong. I was so stupid. Ha ha ha. I can’t even. Fucking Jesus Christ, this sneaky, clever, little fuck figured out a way to control the Equalizers!”

“Don’t swear in the house of god,” Alexa said as she slid the photo back into her pocket. “It’s not polite.”

“Ha ha ha. Stop! Ha ha ha. I see exactly what you’re doing and I can’t even stop you! You’re terrible.” Ember continued to giggle, sounding a little mad.

Cottie tried to remain calm, but couldn't. She glared at Alexa, a frown crossing her face. She had a sudden urge to bite Alexa’s hand, to scream at her, to tell her exactly what she thought of her deductions and donations and where to shove them. Eminence Equality couldn't be manipulated by someone like Alexa! It was impossible! It couldn't be true!

“Ha ha ha. Look at you, Equalizer. Trying so hard not to look mad! Oh God. I love it. This is the true art of mental deconstruction! Let it go, girl. Step into the grinder. Come out clean on the other side. Ha ha ha ha,” Ember choked out, laughing and crying at the same time.

[I think you broke Em and Cottie at the same time. Good job,] Martin commented.

He felt that he was lucky to have spent the most time with Alexa. He was days ahead of the others! Already broken and remade. He didn’t care what his future was supposed to be, he simply knew that being beside Alexa was where he belonged. It wasn’t simply because he liked her, it was because she made him into a better, stronger person by shattering his beliefs and recasting him whole. He saw the same pattern, the same tactics that were used on him now applied to the two girls and found it... amusing.

Alexa’s bracelet beeped. Martin stepped next to her and grabbed her hand. Cottie didn’t do anything because Alexa was already petting her face. She simply stood there, looking very annoyed and lost.

Ember stopped laughing and looked at Alexa, like a frightened animal with no way out.

“Do I have to?” She stuttered.

“You can take my hand and come with us to the doomed world of tomorrow, or stay here... alone with Daddums and his tired intern for I dunno how long. Them’s the beans,” Alexa said.

Both options seemed equally horrible to Ember. She would die here alone... or she would die with her brother in the future. She grabbed Alexa’s hand, putting hers atop Martin’s.

Darkness fell.

----------------------------------------

The world aged 400 years in an instant. The cathedral still stood, albeit a tad broken, looking somewhat worse for wear. The stained glass windows were partially shattered. The hologram was gone. A fusion reactor hummed with a bit of a stutter somewhere in the deep. The brains in the walls were long dead, but the reactor had taken over their security function, as Martin noted. There was a shimmering blue shield pulsating through the cracked walls of ancient stone, keeping the place standing and sealed.

This place was another safe haven from the skinwalkers. Safe and... completely inaccessible from the outside.

Martin now knew that Cottie had been a very vital piece of Alexa’s minion puzzle. Without her they would never get into this church. What did Alexa do exactly to attract the attention of the Equalizers? Was it really just donations? Was it as simple as that? Or did she manage to trick their probability calculator so that they would send Cottie her way? What kind of a superweapon did Alexa have? The nukes weren't real.

[WHAT?! The nukes aren't real?] Cottie choked.

[Nah. It's a single depleted dud I found out here and paid a super to replicate a thousand times with a bar of gold. Enough to cover the interior of my treehouse,] Alexa confessed.

[Why?!] Cottie groaned, her fists opening and closing.

[Some people give their friends presents. I gave you an idea of infinite nukes to unbalance you. You were too square, too set in your ways.]

In that moment Cottie snapped.

She slapped Alexa.

Then she realized what she did and looked at her hand in embarrassment.

"Welcome to having all the feelings!" Alexa announced, rubbing her stinging, red cheek. "You need feelings to know where you're going. After all, you're my best friend and friends don't let each other behave as cold robots!"

Martin felt it, saw how Cottie's walls broke mentally, crumbled, shattered from within.

[Alexa... did you find information about me here in 2424? What am I going to become?] Martin asked.