Alexa smiled at Bob Klein. Bob was a young hero, assigned to her as release warden. He was walking next to her in his fancy, spotless, dark blue vest uniform and officer’s hat adorned with the SCA Tartarus logo. His sole job was to take her out of the depths of the mountain beneath which sat the Tartarus facility. The inescapable, mind-breaking prison where the heroes had stored villains in S-stasis.
“Sup Bob? How’s the wife? How’s the kids?” Alexa asked, bouncing on her jump shoes.
“Wait. How do you know my real name?” Bob blinked, his foot freezing in place.
“An educated guess, Panda-sama!” Alexa answered with an even bigger grin.
“A guess?” Bob glared at her.
His Hero name was Pandora. There was no way that this girl could guess his real name. Did some asshole tech tell her his name? He didn’t trust techs. They were smarter than him and sometimes played practical jokes on the Tartarus security personnel. Especially on Bob.
“Bob is a very popular name you see! You definitely look like a Bob, I can feel it in my ancient, weary bones!”
“You ain’t ancient.” Bob said. “You’re fourteen.”
“You know nothing, Mr. Klein!” Alexa whined. “I’ve been greatly aged by the hardships of the simulation! Why, I could be one hundred thousand years at this point!”
“What the fuck.” Bob squinted at Alexa. This was not okay. She knew his last name too! She knew that he was married and had kids! How?!
“How long have I been under, Bobby?” Alexa lamented with a fake, theatrical voice as if she was in a TV drama series. “They won’t tell me how long I’ve been frozen in carbonite while my mind was sent up to Titanomachy. Why won’t they tell me my real age?! How many birthday candles is my cake supposed to have now? How will they all fit?”
“You’ve been under exactly 24 hours, Ms. Terranova.” Bob said, gritting his teeth. This was not okay! How the hell did she know? What else did she know? Fucking supervillains! How was she so spunky after the simulation? He’s taken prisoners out of Tartarus before. They behaved themselves differently, had no energy, no life left in their eyes and were extra obedient to SCA authority. Something was askew here. Alexa’s eyes sparked with abundant vitality. She made jokes! Something was horribly wrong!
“You don’t need to lie to me! Break it to me gently, Bobby-sama! Are all of my minions dead now? Do I have to make their grand-grand-grand children my minions now? Gosh I hope they bred nicely! I wouldn't mind having an army of little Martins and Cotties.”
Bob wasn’t listening to Alexa. He grabbed her by her dirty vest and dragged her into the maglev train, shoving her down onto an orange seat.
“How do you know my identity? Are you going to threaten me? Hurt my family? Why are you so... happy?!” He growled. A dark portal flashed behind him, many two-dimensional tentacles emerging.
“Whoa, whoa there buddy. Calm the heck down. No need to hentai me up with those pointy portal bits. I know everything about everything. It’s my job to know. I’m not an actual prisoner you see. I’m what’s called a Secret-prisoner!”
“What?” Bob blinked.
“See, it’s like a Secret-shopper! I’m actually an auditor hero that’s been inserted into the Tartarus sim to expose corrupt wardens. Mostly Hero Resonance. She’s the woooorst offender by far!”
“Hero Resonance is the best warden we’ve got! She reeducates villains quicker than anyone else! Holds a record for it in fact,” Bob defended his friend. Resonance and him sometimes shared lunch time at work. He liked her. She seemed, acted much older than she looked.
The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.
“Oh please, Bobby. Ember Kilborne aka Hero Resonance might look like a nice person, but inside her there was rot, a super-mold of sorts that had infected this entire place. She was a moldy evil that I was forced to stamp out, set ablaze like a good forest ranger!”
“I don’t believe you one bit.”
“James Allistar.” Alexa pointed at another guard outside of the train. “He likes his coffee black. You two occasionally play cards during breaks and you lose 59% of the time.”
Bob’s mouth dropped open. This girl KNEW things. Was she really a secret prisoner? Was that really a thing?!
“Lisa Miller.” Alexa pointed at another Tartarus guard as the train doors closed shut and the train started to move. “She brings lunch to work and leaves it in the fridge because she’s always on diet. You’ve had to throw out her lunches into your nether dimensions thing as they pile up, smell and take up all of the available fridge space. Close your mouth, we’re off to see the Wizard of Oz show very soon! The curtain will fall and the boobie behind it will be revealed for all to see!”
The dark portal behind Bob snapped shut as his mouth closed.
"Oh yeah? What's your Tartarus employee ID number?" He asked suddenly.
"4479-7202-194A-CG33," Alexa cited.
The number sequence sounded correct.
She knew everything. She’s likely been watching them through the cameras, rating their performance. It was the only thing that made sense. He had no doubt now that the girl was a secret prisoner now, some kind of a tester from the outside.
“I’m sorry, Ms. Terranova,” he said. “I didn’t realize you were a supervisor techie.”
“Don’t feel too bad about it! I appreciate you guys. Each and every one of you. Doing your job, being extra diligent. Making sure nobody escapes Tartarus. Too bad you’re all losing your jobs in about 19 minutes. I feel bad, honestly, I do. I also recommend you sell all of your S-credits too. Cus the price is going to drooooop hard, once Titanomachy falls.”
“What?” Just when Bob couldn't be befuddled any further, Alexa managed to squeeze another punch in.
“Not literally of course. Metaphorically. Were you not listening, my dude? Hero Resonance is a very bad apple. In 18 minutes my report about this place is going out, broadcast directly from Titanomachy. I’ve already sold all of My S-credits off. Gotta be ahead of the game, you see.”
“What?” Bob choked.
“Shit is going to hit the fan, Bobby and it’s going to hit it very hard,” Alexa pulled a fat USB stick from her pocket and wiggle it in front of Bob’s face. “Check it out. I spent my 1 million S-credits on a USB stick. A most sound investment! I suggest you buy some candy from the train trolley or something, while you can still afford things. Buy all the candy for your little Josie and Anna! Splurge like Harry Potter while supplies last! 17 minutes to buy all the things, my man.”
Bob gulped. If this girl was indeed a secret prisoner and she had found deep corruption in the Tartarus system, it would be a huge blow to the Superstate. Would the currency really fall as bad as she predicted?
“I like you Officer Klein. Let's be friends, okay? I’m going to be very honest with you right now. No more jokes,” Alexa’s voice had suddenly dropped an octave. “I have been de-aged and my looks have been altered by my insertion team. My real name is Dr. Agatha Myriamm and I’m an agent from the SCA commission in charge of reviewing Tartarus. What I had found out is very bad news for the people running this place and for the Superstate in general. I don’t want to release my report, but I must do it because I’m an honest person.”
Bob blinked.
“I recommend you call up your bank right now and exchange all of your S-credits. This way you won’t end up destitute. The people will probably still hate you, but at least you won’t be poor. In fact, you can thank me later, when you’ll finally be able to pay off your 2.5 bedroom house mortgage and buy your wife a pink flying van that she always wanted. I also like pink, you know. It’s a girls thing.” Alexa winked at the hero.
“Why would you do this for me?” Bob asked, his hands shaking.
“Because, I like you. You’re the last honest and noble Hero in Tartarus. You’re the one red apple amidst rotten ones. You see, I’ve timed my release just right, so that you would be the guard who delivered me out of here. Once my report goes out, some very naughty people won’t like it one bit. They won't like being poor. You on the other hand, can buy this entire Hogwarts express if you play your cards right.”
“Huh?” Bob blinked.
“Exchange your S-credits into something more stable like gold. Become rich. But… anyway you don't have to listen to me! Don't do anything! Miss the opportunity of a lifetime! Just go on unemployment once they SCA shuts down Tartarus. You know what your wife Georgia Klein will do. She will totally appreciate you regardless, I’m sure! Honestly, you are a free person and can do whatever your noble, heroic heart wants to do… in the next 15 minutes!"
Bob looked at Alexa and started to pace back and forth in the train car nervously. His wife would have a fit if he ended up broke and unemployed. Alexa smiled back at Bob with her most serene smile.