“You know what? I know you’re watching me. Guess I’ll have to start my minion presentation outside. Prepare to be impressed!” She theatrically waved her hand at Martin.
“This is Mittens! Drumroll please…” Alexa yelled. Cottie tapped her fingers against her gun, making a miniature drum-roll like sound. “He is my minion numero uno. Part man, part brain-spiders!”
“This is a terrible description of me,” Martin said.
“He’s worth at least four spider-mens right now! Observe how he looks like a useless, weak 14 year old boy! Well you couldn't be any more wrong, daddums! He’s full of surprises and… uhh.. also spiders. Damn it, I should have rehearsed this. Okki.” Alexa shoved Martin towards the door. “Do the thing.”
“What thing?”
“Kiss the keyhole” Alexa pointed.
[What?]
[God, you’re so dim for someone who has four people and four spiders worth of brains at your disposal. Make a tiny skinwalker scout. Get inside the keyhole. See what’s inside.]
[Ah, right.] Martin leaned towards the door, disconnected a tiny segment from Spiderbro and made it jump inside the keyhole.
He suddenly felt very lightheaded and confused as his perspective shifted from his human self to a new, tiny skinwalker. The spider walked through the keyhole, bumping into some sort of a shimmering barrier that began right after the keyhole ended. Martin made it shove a sensor tendril as small as he could make it, squeezing it between the end of the door and the shimmering shield. This allowed him to observe the stuff all around. He saw what appeared to be a very fancy, gothic motif stone room with another set of doors leading into the nave. Right above the door a jar stood on a pedestal with a human brain floating inside, tubes leading from the it into the depths of the cathedral.
“There’s a brain in a jar right about the door. That’s about it,” Martin said.
“Shit. That’s biotech stuff. Highly dangerous and illegal. Now I know why I couldn't get in! He’s using super brains to make an impassable shield!” Ember said, backing away from the door.
She did not want to anger the jar-brains. Who knew what kind of nasty things they could do?
“Dimmy, go run home and cry to your own daddy if you’re scared of some musty, old brain jars. I’m sure Daniel Kilborne would love to hear how and why you lost your powers. You can tell him all about your dastardly plan to take over Titanomachy too,” Alexa pointed towards the direction of the Kiborne’s home.
Ember glared at Alexa. “Screw you.”
“Feisty as ever, I see. Alright, Martin, use Cottie.”
“Uh?” Martin blinked.
[Shoot the brainjar with Eva! You can see exactly where you need to aim! What else are you thinking of? Seriously!]
“Sorry, Cottie, do you mind if I aim you?” He inquired with a blush.
[This is fine. Direct me.] Cottie nodded.
[How the hell did she brainwash an Equalizer?] Ember thought angrily.
“I didn’t. She came pre-brainwashed.” Alexa grinned, leaning on the ex-hero.
Ember sputtered, not knowing what to say to that, concerned that three other people were privy to her thoughts.
Martin took over Cottie’s arms, switched on the nullifier and pressed the trigger. Colors faded from the world. The nullification effect struck the shield, causing a ripple in it. It didn’t seem to fail completely. There must have been similar brain jars all over the cathedral supporting the shield, Martin figured.
Titanomachy had one such protection that he read about. Different backup fusion reactors reinforcing each other, creating an impervious barrier. Except these weren’t fusion reactors. These were the brains of supers. Where did the supervillain get so many super brains? Martin shuddered ever so slightly, focusing on aiming Cottie, triangulating the approximate position of the jar via his small spider keyhole spy and positions of the four teenagers in front of the door.
Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.
“I suggest you step back. We don’t have Ember to catch shrapnel anymore,” he said, making the little scout jump out of the keyhole and onto his shoulder.
Martin and the others retreated away from the door. Cottie stayed perfectly still, aim unchanging.
Martin made Cottie release the trigger. The gun fired with a supersonic bang, the bullet going through the stone wall of the church like it was made of butter. It struck the shield and it warped inwards, wobbling and slamming the jar off the shelf. Martin heard it smash against the floor. The shield in front of the door flickered, growing very weak. Martin directed Cottie to press the trigger again, walking her forward. Eva’s nullification field struck the shield and it vanished.
“I did it! The path is clear!” He yelled.
“Hooray!” Alexa jumped up and down excitedly. [Wohoooooooo! Finally, finally, finally! Take that daddums!] Her thoughts screamed.
Ember looked at the villain, stumped. Her theory about parental murder was beginning to come apart at the seams. It was becoming obvious to her that Alexa had never been inside the church. Maybe she was a really good liar? Ember temporarily reassured herself with this explanation.
Martin made Cottie push against the giant doors and they slid apart with a deep groan, revealing the grimy, stone interior to them. There was a deep layer of dust on the floor. It was obvious that nobody had stepped inside the place in decades.
Alexa looked at the dust. “I should really hire a cleaning lady or buy a roomba or something. This is definitely an allergy zone.” She looked back at Ember. “You don’t have asthma, right? I didn't look into your medical records on the matter of allergies.”
The third minion shook her head, feeling perturbed by the deep silence within the church. The four teens entered the cathedral, making footprints in the dust.
"Have you never been inside this place?" Cottie asked.
"Not that I can remember," Alexa shrugged.
"What?" Martin stared at Alexa. "Then how do you even know this place belongs to your dad?"
"A robot told me," Alexa shrugged.
"A robot told you?!" Martin repeated.
"Yep," Alexa nodded. "A few years ago I woke up outside of this cathedral with no memories."
"Oh," Martin said.
"Observe!" Alexa declared and mentally focused on a memory.
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Alexa fell onto the grass, sputtering and choking. Blue fluid emptied from her lungs as she heaved.
A tall, humanoid figure stood over her.
"Good tomorrow," it said in a cold, metallic voice that sounded a bit like a British butler.
"W-what? Where am I?" Alexa looked in bewilderment around her. She was lying on the grass covered in some sort of quickly evaporating fluid. Her mind was swimming. She couldn't recall who she was or why and how she even arrived on this well-manicured lawn.
Alexa spun her eyes around, trying to get her bearings.
The human figure bent down to her and offered her a white, ill-fitting coat.
She pulled it on, discovering that she looked like a very skinny, very young teenage girl. Her hair was dark brown and wavy.
She looked back at the mechanical human. From a distance, he could have been perhaps mistaken for a man, but up close he looked like a plastic mannequin filled with clockwork. A brain was floating inside of a clear plastic case atop of the thing's head.
"I'm going to self-destruct in exactly forty two seconds," the robot said. "Your name is Alexa Terranova. You're the daughter of a supervillain, Dr. Terranova. You come from a long line of villains, your many-times-great-grandfather is Spring-heeled Jack. Beware, there are heroes aplenty who will attempt to kill you."
"Uhh... okay?" Alexa blinked. "Wait... what?!"
"Your father is working inside the Saint Mary's cathedral behind you," the robot butler clicked, a metal joint pointing at the old, gloomy-looking gothic building that stood behind them. "The place from which you were banished."
She stared at the mechanical man, feeling utterly stupefied.
"The bracelet on your hand will randomly send you into the world of tomorrow," the robot butler said pointing at a black, hexagonal bracelet on her hand. "Figure things out. Survive. Become strong."
"W-what?" Alexa stammered as she looked down at the weird bracelet.
"You are a disappointment. Your memories were erased because you learned too much. This is a punishment for defying me. Steal. Adapt. Grow. Become a true villain and find your way back inside. Goodbye," the butler concluded, clicked, and detonated with a flash, showering the lawn and pelleting her in numerous plastic screws and plates. The brain in the jar ignited and the plastic parts comprising the butler melted and rapidly disintegrated, burning a scorched hole on the lawn.
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"See? That's exactly how I came into existence!" Alexa grinned. "Daddums made me! Or... he banished me from our home and erased my memory. Either hypothesis could be true."
"If you didn't kill your father... then... you're..." Ember muttered, trying to wrap her head around Alexa's revelation.
“Oh, I know! I shall file you under Boromir. You’re here because you’re curious, Dimmy... not because you want to help us save the world. You’re probably going to betray us at the earliest convenience and then cry about it a lot,” Alexa commented, as Cottie shoved the next set of doors open.
The figure of a man with the name tag [Doctor Terranova] stood in the center of the nave. He was facing them, looking silver and transparent.
A skeleton wearing a lab coat laid on the floor in the center of the nave, surrounded by dust covered lab equipment and machinery that nobody had used in decades.
“GGGgg-ghost!” Martin yelped, stepping backwards and tripping on Ember. His sister howled in turn as he stepped on her foot.