My recent experiences traveling on the King’s Road haven’t been great. First, I was abducted by a madman who used me as a component in one of the worst summoning attempts I’ve ever seen. Then, on the way to Summer Spire, we were attacked by bandits. Admittedly a lot less dangerous than the first situation but it speaks to a pattern.

But I won’t let that color this trip. Surely, after two incidents, the kingdom would see to the security of its most important road. There’s no way something could happen a third time in a row.

What are the chances an hour after we stop for lunch on the second day, I feel the carriage come to a stop? What are the chances that when I look out the window, I see a suspiciously familiar log blocking the road? Haha.

…sigh.

“Nope,” I say, closing the wooden shutters and leaning back onto the seat while scowling. “I’m not doing this again.”

“Don’t pout.” My wife is already pulling out her bow. “A little exercise is good for you.”

“Am I cursed or is it this road? Because something is going on here.”

“Perhaps your country’s armed forces are simply slacking.”

Soldiers who didn’t do your jobs, I hate you. Because of you, criminals of every kind are using this road as a feeding ground. Have some respect for your duty. If it was me, I’d fire the lot of them and get contracted elementals to do the job. You don’t see Geneva slacking despite doing boring tasks. You lot are only good enough to be bled for her meals.

“Attention traders! The Red Caped Bandits have you surrounded. Release your goods and we will allow you to keep your lives. Attack us and your lives are forfeit!”

“Red Caped Bandits? Saints, he sounds like a theatre troupe. How grandiose for someone the city guards literally refer to as Rat. No, you know what? He wants to do this? Fine. You ready, Kii?”

Kierra slips her quiver onto her back and gives me a grin. Scooping up Bell, I jump out of my carriage.

At the end of the convoy, Maxine is standing with a group of her guards, the men dressed in shining golden armor. Across from them, on horseback, is Rat. The same as before, there are several men in patchwork armor on horseback surrounding him. A dozen more in shoddy leathers stand beside them, eyeing the multiple carriages with greed.

Rat is looking at the Guiness knights with unease but that turns to fear when he spots me. “You!”

“Don’t even think about it!” I bark when I see him grip the reins of his horse. “You try running and she’ll put an arrow through your neck. Think you can get away a second time?”

The bandit swallows and lets go of the reins, shoulders slumping. “I surrender.”

“What?” one of the men next to him hisses. “What do you mean surrender? Who cares about their fancy armor, we can take them. Just think of all the gold behind them.”

“Fool! I don’t care about the knights. I care about the monster we can’t see.” His head swivels, searching for the elf that nearly killed him and decimated his forces.

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“Scared of a little girl. Forget you! I’m getting that gold!” The crazed bandit pulls his sword from the scabbard on his waist and urges his horse forward.

Two gallops. Then an arrow cuts through the air and embeds itself in his neck, knocking him off his mount. The other bandits abruptly pause as they were preparing to follow him, eyes wide. Even the knights beside me are caught off guard, hands leaving the hilts of their weapons and mana being retracted from spells as their target goes down. Both groups are looking for the source of the attack but Kierra is a ghost.

I clap my hands, drawing their attention. “Anyone who doesn’t want to die, dismount, drop your weapons and lay on the ground. That goes for you idiots hiding in the trees as well!” I add while raising my voice. “Run if you want, but you won’t get too far with your leader captured!”

Rat doesn’t hesitate, swiftly dismounting and pulling off his weapons. The others follow, obviously not happy. They take too long and another arrow knocks one of the men off his horse, panicking the animal as its rider falls off its back.

That gets them moving. There are a few screams from the side and a ragtag group of youths flee from their shoddy cover and lay on the road.

Once all of the bandits have surrendered, Kierra walks out smirking while carrying a struggling child in her arms. A young girl. A little hard to tell through all the dirt and grime. “Quite the catch there, dear wife.”

“The only one who didn’t surrender.” She moves her head away as the young girl tries to punch her. “I don’t know if she’s brave, stupid, or rabid, but there’s no reasoning with her.”

“Wait!”

I hold back a laugh as one of the boys speaks up. He’s trying to meet my eyes while obeying the instruction to lay down. Reminds me of a creature called a seal I once saw in a book.

“She’s not a bad girl. She’s just scared. Please don’t hurt her!”

“And you are…”

“Earl, her brother.”

“Well, Earl, if you don’t want her hurt you should get her to calm down.”

“Can I—”

“Yeah, idiot, that’s your cue to get up.”

The boy hurries to his feet. He quickly approaches Kierra who drops the child. The surprisingly agile child who lands on her feet. She looks ready to lunge at Kierra but Earl scoops her up. “That’s enough, Ann. That’s enough.”

She struggles a little more but eventually calms down in her brother’s arms. Jeez, she can’t be more than six or seven. What could have happened to make her so angry? My plan was to leave them here for the next patrol to pick up but with the state of the road, that could be days from now. And what would they do with the children?

I’m not a softy. Seeing the dozen or so youths lain out on the road tickles my heart a little bit but I’m a realist. There are hundreds, if not thousands of orphans, in the kingdom. Poor children whose parents die fighting strong manabeasts, unwanted children a peasant family can’t take care of, the poor bastards of a noble who can’t keep it in his pants.

No, this is a matter of security. Despite their unfortunate starts, those children find their place in society. As menial labor or small-time bandits that give the guards a chance to earn their gold. But this Ann…

Saints save her, she’s like a wild animal. I swear I hear her growling at us. It’s ones like this that grow up to be the especially cruel criminals that raze villages or the insane type that does something horrifying like eating their victims. I know about these things as my father’s small village was plagued by such a bandit once. It was…nasty.

Ugh. Saints know the guards aren’t going to give the girl the attention she needs and I’m finding it a little difficult to just ignore the situation. Ah, what should I do…

Oh, wait. I need servants. The brother who must be at least fourteen seems sensible. And he had the guts to speak up to save his sister. Speaks to his character. With him and a decent upbringing, maybe the girl won’t turn into a maniac. Or maybe she tries to kill me in my sleep. Either way, having her around should make things interesting.

That thought settles it. These siblings must be Cosmo’s blessing to me, delivering me events that are ‘amusing’. Good, good. I won’t disappoint!

“Eh, Earl was it?”

The brother raises his head, looking at me with apprehension as he keeps his sister pinned to his lap.

“Do you have any work experience?”