Chapter Two

The First Night Back

When Jenna arrived back at the Dahlia Palace, it was too late to hash everything out with Excelyn, Phillip, and Celestina. She didn’t even get to hash things out with Sardius, as he was busy doing cyber detective work with Conrad.

One thing was obvious. They had a traitor on their security team. If they didn’t, there was no way Fallcet and the AAMC guys could have approached her palace in the first place. Sardius thought it was someone on the orbital security team, though he wasn’t excluding anyone from his questioning. However, he needed proof before he could accuse anyone. He opted to work with Conrad through the night as Conrad was the least suspicious in Sardius’ mind and he was already on shift, so working with him to plug the security leak immediately made the most sense.

With all that going on, Jenna did not get to stretch out next to him in bed and figure out… all that needed to be figured out.

Instead, she found herself fiddling with the control panel in her room. Now that she had Sardius’ full name, she decided to do a little snooping. Who was Sardius Veritacalus? Even though the search engines in outer space were like ten thousand flyers stuffed into your mailbox, she thought she might be able to find one picture of him.

She was well rewarded.

The first picture she found was a recruitment poster. They were openly advertising for people in their system to join their cause, become freedom fighters, and join Sardius Veritacalus in the cause for rights, justice, and the boneman way of life.

Jenna stared at the picture and she suddenly understood why he opted to dismiss his blue eyes. His eyes had not been baby blue. They had been the deep blue of an autumn sky over marigold leaves. Jenna found herself staring into them like she was suddenly given the key to why people fell in love at first sight.

Other than his eyes, his face was a little different in the posters than the version she saw of him now. He had told her when he was still in prison that he was not pleased with his current appearance, but then he also mentioned that he had been in a hospital for a while after he escaped the prison and got to her corner of the universe.

The explanation seemed simple to her. He had been a dangerous heartthrob before he had been imprisoned, but when he was caught and put in prison, his face had been wrecked. His body seemed fine. Not only did he brag constantly about how fit he was, but he had been in good enough shape to fight his way out of the prison. Now that she knew there was no such person as Ryatt, she knew he had fought his way out alone. To Jenna, that meant that his face had been smashed in again and had only recently been reconstructed.

He looked the same, but different. The dark eyes changed his look considerably, but his jaw and nose bones had a slightly different set to them. If anything, he looked like a man who seriously resembled Sardius Veritacalus without actually being him.

She looked at the screen.

She looked at her bed.

She looked back at the screen.

He was going to get caught. If she kept him on as her head bodyguard and people got used to seeing him in the position through the newsreels, someone was going to piece together who he really was. What would happen then?

Jenna went to a text search and started reading articles on Sardius’ crimes: the rich he’d robbed, the palaces he’d bombed, the money he stole, and the wide array of people he’d pissed off.

Favel was right to allow him to be her personal assistant. If he was still in the jail there could be no one finer for training her to protect herself on the larger universal scale. However, having him in person was problematic. Someone was going to show up. Mobsters? Arms dealers? Angry billionaires? Disgraced government officials? You name it, he’d turned all their cranks wrong, made them lose money, killed people close to them, and enraged countless dangerous people.

Jenna could not believe the gall of him. Wasn’t he afraid of dying? Torture? Consequences?

It was at that moment when the man himself came into the room. “Why aren’t you sleeping?” he asked softly as he approached the bed. Then he looked at the screen and the article about him that she was reading. “Wow, Jenna,” he said coldly, as he proceeded to talk about himself like he wasn’t there. “You were such a good girl for so long. Even when Sardius went missing you didn’t read up on him. I checked the search history when I got here to see what you’d learned about him. Why didn’t you look him up then? Why now?”

She sighed and prepared to do the same thing he was doing—talk about himself as though he wasn’t there. She guessed he didn’t want Conrad, or anyone else, to find out his true identity. “I didn’t know his last name before the marriage certificate arrived. I wanted to see how much danger he was in, why he couldn’t come, why he can’t be in love with me, and all that stuff.”

He approached her. “What was your verdict?”

“Okay,” she said. “I think I underestimated how much danger he was in.”

“Then you know why he shouldn’t be here,” he said softly.

It was at that second that Jenna got it. He wasn’t planning on staying. He had never been planning on staying. He had come here to check on her. Once he confirmed that she was safe, he was leaving. But going where? Where could he go? What could he do? His war back home was already won.

She clicked her tongue and wondered how she could word her questions. When she found an angle, she started. “I want to marry Sardius. I have the marriage certificate and everything, but there seems to be a reason why he doesn’t want to marry me. I think you know why.”

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“The third husband thing is awkward,” he said slowly. “Fallcet isn’t the only man in the universe who would find an offer like that insulting. Honestly, I found it insulting for Vinia when she married Arvantis. The position suggests that the person who takes that role has nothing to offer but a mad set of bedroom skills. Not only do very few people have those kinds of skills, but most people have so much more to offer.”

“If it’s so insulting, why was Josh willing to do it? And Phillip?” Jenna demanded.

“Well,” Sardius grinned. “Josh is the kind of man who is not bothered by the things that others say or think. His joy comes from his craft and Celestina is his greatest muse. He films her doing everything. Give him any label, job, or title, it doesn’t matter. He’s an artist in his heart and nothing can touch that.”

“Well, that’s positively beautiful,” Jenna said, trying not to let the color of a flush reach her face.

“And Philip wants to be a dog wearing a collar and licking Excelyn’s leg. He’s pleased he was able to find an avenue where they could be together. You must know that won’t suit Sardius.” He leaned against the bedpost and tried to look for all the world like what he was saying had nothing to do with him.

Jenna glared at him. “So, you’re saying Sardius does love me, it’s just that he can’t discard what everyone says about him and love me as much as Josh loves Celestina? And unlike Phillip, he can’t let anyone think I’m his owner and he’s my dog?”

Ryatt chuckled.

Jenna did not expect that and her face fell, losing her aggressive edge.

The chuckle continued, deep and throaty. “I’m not sure he would mind either one of those things. There is a chasm of difference between a man like Sardius and men like Josh and Phillip. Have you ever heard the term ‘what goes around comes around’?”

Jenna had to stifle a snort. “Of course.”

“Josh takes pictures. If he pisses anyone off with what he does, their best revenge is pictures. Pictures are pictures, they are not bombs.”

Jenna softened. She saw where he was going with this.

“Likewise, with Phillip,” he continued. “He’s an Octavian doctor, meaning that even if he does harm in his field of work, he’s done so much good that a score of powerful people will have his back.” Sardius huffed a breath and sat in front of Jenna cross-legged. “The problem with Sardius is threefold. First, he was the poster child of rebellion. Lots of people don’t know of the identities of any other rebels. He kept other people off the posters and used himself over and over again, so as not to involve other people. Second, he personally did a great number of the crimes he was charged with. He didn’t order other people to blow things up, he rigged the building himself, pressed the button himself, and told everyone he did it on the news afterward.”

Jenna winced.

“Third, he hasn’t made any friends in this quadrant of the universe. If anyone with a grudge from Sardius’ past life hears that he’s the third wife of an Octavian diplomat—”

Jenna noticed his use of the word wife instead of the word husband and frowned.

He continued, “They’ll think he’s gone soft and become an easy target. They’d be here as soon as their ships could carry them here. Let’s be honest, Jenna. The Octavians and the Adamis would not enjoy having to use their military resources to protect a man whose conflict has arrived on their doorstep. They would either hand him over to the mobsters who have come to collect him or they would discharge you of your diplomatic responsibilities and fork you over to the mobsters along with him.”

“Favel would never!” Jenna retorted.

“Favel fetching would!” Sardius bit back. “Get a clue! Favel is very benevolent, it’s true, but if you think he would put your safety ahead of that of his people, you are dead wrong. You are a diplomat. You exist to provide safety, not for things to be sacrificed for you. You’re the sacrifice if you can’t gain peace any other way. Not only that but in the ocean, there is no such thing as murder. Your individual life doesn’t matter if it’s feeding something larger, stronger, or more important than you. Favel has had dozens of his children die, his wife die, and he kills things forty times a day. That’s part of the reason he’s less alarmed by the blood of my rebellion than other people. He cries about what he’s lost, but it’s very clear what he would do if faced with that problem. It’s actually because of such rampant death among Octavians that they have the option of having eight spouses. At any given moment, you might learn that one or more of them has died!”

Jenna shuddered, but let Sardius continue.

“Favel would absolutely do what he had to do to keep the peace of his home planet and I don’t know how many ships would arrive or how much danger they would pose. If Sardius’ enemies kill you and cut the crown off your head, they would have no problem sending it back to the Octavians like a love letter. And the Octavians would receive it with that spirit.” He slowed down and put his hand on Jenna’s. “Do you understand now?”

Jenna nodded. She hadn’t thought of any of that. She let go of his hand and flopped on the bed. “Sorry. I was being stupid and selfish. I was only thinking about how lonely I have always been, how yummy he is, and how I have been pining for him since I realized I was in love.”

“Yummy? After all these years and all his broken noses, he’s not as yummy as he used to be. However, Sardius is a responsible person and he would never tell you he loved you if he couldn’t give you his love. He needs time to amass some of his previous strength before he comes to you.”

The cryptic way they were talking was making it hard for Jenna to ask direct questions, but she managed to think of one Sardius could answer as Ryatt. “You want to go to him, don’t you? But you can’t because your job here is to make sure I’m safe, but I’m not safe.”

“Exactly.” He turned to the screen with the flashy picture of Sardius being displayed in ten thousand colors and instructed, “Close that up and let’s not look him up again.”

Jenna blackened the screen, aware that she couldn’t moon over Sardius’ old pictures without someone noticing something. It was a good thing Ixy was asleep. That was the sort of thing she noticed.

She also understood what he was trying to tell her. He couldn’t be anything more to her right now than Ryatt, her bodyguard. That was all he could offer her. He wouldn’t touch her or love her or do anything to escalate their relationship, not as Sardius and not as Ryatt. He was putting a divide up between them and giving her ferocious reasons why the divide couldn’t be crossed.

Jenna breathed and breathed while she aligned herself with reality.

It wasn’t the lack of sex that bothered her. They had only kissed three times. Sex was a million miles away on her relationship roadmap. It was their emotional connection. As far as she was concerned, he’d already been inside her brain in a way no other person had ever been before. He’d seen her naked, chosen her clothing, and seen her at her most vulnerable. She wasn’t sure what else she had to give him.

On the other side of that coin, what had he given her?

She hesitated. Her first impulse was to ask him to take off his clothes and give her a little show. He’d seen her undressed often enough that it was only fair, but the request turned to ashes on her tongue. It wasn’t right to demand such things. He had never once demanded that she take off her clothes for his amusement or to deepen their intimacy.

She couldn’t ask him personal questions either. He had already said everything he was willing to say. Not to mention that every time they spoke of Sardius they had to do so in a backward, third-person, way. It was confusing and it weakened their communication.

Jenna was figuratively scratching her head wondering how to proceed.

He interrupted. “Let’s put Sardius aside and talk about how you got kidnapped and why Smoothie is gone.”

Jenna sat upright. “Smoothie is gone?”