Chapter Twenty Five
Pleasant Cuts
When the day came for the diplomatic candidates to arrive, Jenna’s plan was set. The first thing she had to do was greet them. Working with Misha, she decided to go all out welcoming them. She even allowed a collection of news outlets to show footage of her meeting them. Naturally, the news outlets were not allowed to have people there, or even their own equipment. Instead, Sardius took video footage of the event with a fleet of drones and sent the footage out as part of a press package he created.
The nominees were brought off their pods and gathered at the entrance of the Dahlia Palace where they stood with their luggage looking like tourists who felt very entitled to whatever accommodations and services they were about to receive.
Jenna didn’t like the look of any of them as she watched them from the window.
“Am I ready?” she asked Misha.
Misha snapped a loose thread on Jenna’s shoulder with her teeth. “Rock it.”
The double doors to the palace swung open and Jenna stepped through them like a model on the runway. Her dress was a grand thing of blue and green turquoise: skirt everywhere, slit up the side, high heels with heels sharp enough to stab someone and toes sharp enough to carve a hole in them. Her hair was a tangled mass of waves. The humidity in the palace was enough that no one was getting smooth hair unless water was currently being poured over them.
The pinnacle of the look was the smooth black crown on her head. It was more than the crown she couldn’t help wearing constantly. It was tall and curved like a raptor beak with an opposing spike in the back that symbolized the lower jaw. It was huge and it weighed a ton, but on this occasion, a garish display was completely necessary. Jenna was not going to act like she was a nothing, a nobody. If she had ever been forced to hide herself to fit in, this moment was her revenge. Finally, everyone could see her crown and for once, the truth didn’t make her crazy or weird. Now, she was the most important person in the room or out of it.
“Welcome,” she said in a low tone when she reached the applicants huddled in a hot mess.
Vash stepped forward and acted as butler and coordinator. On Earth, his job would usually have been held by a pretty little woman who could pacify any unhappy guest with her cheerfulness and sweetness. Vash had neither of those qualities, but Jenna was not running a spa resort, even though the people standing on the dock seemed to think that was what was happening. Instead, Vash stood a head taller than the tallest man and seemed more like a bouncer than a coordinator. Jenna liked him a lot.
She greeted each of the applicants by name while Vash handed them a welcome package that included everything they would need to participate in the screening process. He took them to get settled in their rooms in the Sand Palace before they had dinner with everyone in the Dahlia Palace.
Back inside, Jenna fell on the first chair she came to. She had only walked a few meters in her shoes, but they had already cut the flesh of her right heel. She was bleeding and the blood had stained her shoes.
In her ear, Sardius was saying, “I begin to see what you meant by bringing these people here. Their rooms are tapped and they’re so stupid about it, they’re saying whatever they want. One of the men thinks you spent too much on your dress when you should have spent the money to make sure he was more comfortable. He thinks you should have met them with an air-conditioned tent and a buffet with drinks and fruit.” Sardius stopped his ranting. “Jenna, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing. My shoes don’t fit very well and I’m bleeding. Can you call Misha to bring me a bandage?”
A second later he said, “I’ve called her, but why wasn’t the fit checked before you went out wearing them?”
“I didn’t think it was very important. Other than trying them on with the dress, this is the first time I’ve worn them.”
Misha came around the corner with a first aid kit and began working on Jenna’s heel. “I’m sorry, Madam.”
“Don’t worry about it. This sort of thing happens all the time. Tape the other heel too and then I can keep wearing the shoes.”
Sardius sputtered in Jenna’s ear, “What did you just say? This happens all the time? And you’re just going to keep wearing them?”
“Haven’t you ever heard the expression ‘beauty is pain’, Sardius?”
“Yeah. The slogan was etched into the side of my laser gun when I was a pirate, but it was a joke. I have never worn anything for five minutes that cut me.”
Jenna groaned. “You’re hilarious. Listen, women have lived by that saying for centuries. It’s not an empty sacrifice. What we did just now was a power move and a necessary one. That monkey you mentioned who was complaining earlier probably can’t bear for anyone to be more important than him. He’d be the worst in negotiations. Everything is always going to be about showing how awesome he is. We can’t have him. Really, this was a small price to pay.”
“Want me to send him home?” Sardius offered.
“It’s more than likely we’re going to have to send all of them home,” she replied blandly.
***
Jenna had dinner with the seven candidates. From the way they acted, she discounted three of them as impossible, but she gave no indication that any of them were out of her favor, smiling and enjoying the food with them.
This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.
After dinner, Favel and two other members of the Octavian Council came to talk to the candidates about the importance of their work maintaining peace.
One of the candidates was so drunk, he didn’t hear a word.
Afterward, Jenna got up, thanked everyone in attendance, and told them all about the interview process that would take place over the next two days. She told them that they would each take an electronic test on the tablets that they had been provided, but only two people would be able to take the test at a time. They had to watch their tablets and begin the test when they received their invitation. Meals would be served in the Sand Palace. On the second day, they’d have a round of guest speakers and workshops on cooperating with Octavians. Jenna would see them at dinner on the second day.
Favel lingered after everyone had gone. “I’ve got to say,” he said in a confidential tone, “I don’t think much of your candidates.”
“Me neither,” she replied breezily.
“Then why are you bothering to interview them?”
“This is the first place we need to pull a diplomat from. Here, this planetary system. Afterward, we’re going to need to get a collection of candidates from the Adamis Alliance Military Conglomerate.”
“The AAMC?” Favel asked in grave tones. “Getting a reasonable candidate from there will perhaps be harder than what you’ve gathered here.”
“It doesn’t matter if it’s easy or hard. I have to interview them until I find someone I like. If I don’t pull at least one diplomat from there, it will cause an incident. Sardius is already working them into the schedule, but I wanted to start with this group. I had to tell the AAMC that I started with the people who had been nominated here because we need new diplomats now, and it was more convenient.”
“I see. Listen, I stayed back because I wanted to ask you a question. I heard that Excelyn Factic was not invited to this selection process. Why not?”
“Because I’m ditching these nuts to go recruit her personally tomorrow.”
“You are?”
“That was always the plan. I’m taking a crown with me and I’m not leaving her place until she has it suctioned to her head.”
Favel made a sound like laughing. “I’ve met her a few times. She’s tough, but she’s also sensitive to social media explosions and she’s been at the center of many. Recruiting her may not be easy.”
“Yeah? Well, I’m going to get her even if I have to shave her head myself.” Jenna didn’t make empty threats.
Favel lifted a tentacle almost like he was going to touch Jenna, but then held back.
Jenna looked at him sideways, a smile stretching across her lips. “I thought you didn’t like to touch Adamis since anything you touch, you also taste.”
Favel glanced at Jenna. “Goodnight,” he said as he disappeared into an entrance to the ocean in the floor with a slither that didn’t cause a splash.
Jenna leaned over the water and waved goodbye.
“He was trying to kiss you,” Sardius said in her ear when Favel was gone.
“What? No. No, he wasn’t.”
“Yes, he was,” Sardius repeated, with no humor in his voice.
Jenna paused and thought. “Why would he want to do that?”
“You are insanely popular among the Octavians. They love you. From what I’ve seen, Favel loves you personally. Not like a lover or anything like that. The only equivalent feeling I can think of is the way a human feels about a dog who is so clever. You are his puppy. He has been supporting Excelyn’s nomination for decades and if you’re going to get her, he loves you. If you succeed, you might not be able to do wrong in his eyes.”
“What would have happened if he did kiss me?” Jenna wondered, hoping Sardius would know the answer.
“It would have been a gentle cupping of one of his suckers on the back of your hand. Probably pleasant… ish, as long as you aren’t disgusted by Octavians. As I said, it wouldn’t have been romantic any more than petting a dog is romantic.”
“I see,” Jenna said, dropping to a nearby settee and removing her high heel. She looked down at the bandage Misha had put on her. It was thrashed. It had been worn through and the injury on her heel had worsened. Her other heel had been damaged through the tape.
“I’m calling Misha,” Sardius said darkly.
“Why haven’t you guys improved bandage technology?”
“We have,” Sardius grumbled. “You saw what they did to Lucy when your cat scratched her. There’s just no point to doing that here if you’re just going to allow your ankle to get sliced up again.”
Misha came running, but she said something different than what Jenna expected her to say. “Jenna, this is harassment! Can you please get Sardius to back off? I said I’d deal with the problem, but his holograms are like harpies and they won’t leave me alone.”
“What are you talking about? Didn’t he just call for you to help me with my bandage?”
“Yes, he did, but that’s not all he’s doing.” She glared at one of the camera lenses.
Jenna stopped and listened to her earpiece. Sardius was completely quiet in her ear. Turning her attention back to Misha, she continued, “Can you get me the first aid kit? I’ll just keep it with me and take care of this myself. But first, what is Sardius doing?”
“He made holographic copies of your feet and he’s been trying them on all the shoes I’ve acquired for you. He says that 87% of them don’t fit you and need to be returned. He doesn’t understand. Your feet are weird. I got the closest approximations. I know they’re not perfect, but you asked to wear shoes that matched your dresses. I got them for you. He’s being crazy unreasonable. He’s put huge holographic red xs on them that blink and make a buzzing sound I can hear outside your costume wardrobe. Can you please make him stop?”
“Yes. Sardius, please stop the noise. There’s no need to torture my stylist.”
He grunted, disapprovingly. “Would you like me to get the knife? We could cut off your toes and your heels if you’d like to wear those shoes. They would fit much better with chunks of your feet gone.”
“Stop making empty threats,” Jenna replied calmly. “Sardius, do I own a pair of water shoes that are not part of that 87% that don’t fit me?”
“Yes.”
“Then we have everything we need for tomorrow. Misha, make up a look for me for their final dinner that is based around the nicest shoes I have that are in the pile of shoes Sardius has not vetoed. Everyone satisfied?”
Misha nodded and hurried to get the first aid kit.
Sardius didn’t say anything for a full minute and neither did Jenna.
Finally, he said, “If I was in charge of your shoes, and I can be with a single word from you, that would never happen again.”
Jenna looked up at the camera and made a bunch of snap hearts with her fingers. “You can’t be in charge of everything. You’ll wear yourself out. You hired Misha. Let her do her job. Whatever you do, you can’t act like a computer that doesn’t need to rest. There are more important things for you to worry about than whether or not my shoes fit.”
Sardius blew out dissatisfied chunks of air and the sound was picked up by his microphone.
Jenna pulled the oversized crown off her head.
Neither one of them said anything.
Finally, Jenna asked, “What are the nominees up to now that they’re supposed to be tucked in bed?”
He smirked. “Nothing good.”