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I went to the train station and boarded the next train. I kept to myself, and as usual everyone around me kept well away from me. I sat working on a spreadsheet on my cell phone, not paying any mind to the background noises in the train car. I felt duty-bound to complete a bit of work remotely at least, given I’d left early. 

I fixed my eyes on the ads put up on the walls, my mind a bit distracted. We were going through a subway line, so there was nothing to fix my eyes on the outside of the lit car. I focused on my phone instead, but then it rang. 

Caramelldansen. 

It was an in-joke between Reiko-chan and I. She’d adored the videos everyone made and posted online. We both did. It became our thing. We danced it together, feeling foolish for having done so, but it was one of the best memories I’d made with her. Well, that and our gaming sessions. 

She had a cute and nerdy streak, and she was pretty brutal when she fought, particularly when her temper flared up. This tendency was a bit unusual for a girl outside anime. I attribute her behavior to the fact that she enjoyed playing the games I did. Fighting games were exciting. We played Dragonball, Tekken, Dead or Alive, Fatal Fury, Street Fighter, or pretty much any other fighting game which caught my fancy. I bought them, and loved them sincerely, but despite the fact they were mine, she used to regularly beat me in them when she visited. I’d ceased to pass time by playing games since leaving home.

“Reiko-chan!” I exclaimed, crowing. She was calling me for the first time in a long time! She changed her mind! She still cares about me!

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The phone displayed her name. Reiko-chan. I answered the call to exclaim joyfully into my phone’s microphone. “Reiko-chan! I’m so happy to hear from you, my best friend! I know you care about me, and I miss you!”

Everyone stared at me due to my outburst, but they quickly disregarded me. I blushed, embarrassed, my heart fluttering. No response came. Then the line disconnected. 

B-butt dialed? Obviously she reconnected her line! I’ll try to call her back! Maybe she’ll be so embarrassed she did it! So cute! We’ll laugh about it, together! Hehehe! It’ll be so much fun, she’ll even let me hear her sweet voice for a moment while yelling at me! It’ll be like old times with her, our friendship rekindled! Even if she gets married, we can still be best friends! I’m sure she sees it, too! 

I dialed her back halfway through my thoughts. The words I heard immediately puzzled me.

This line is not connected.

While my mind was frozen after having received her message, I faintly heard something crinkle below my hands, coming from the direction of my lap. I looked down to notice a folded newspaper with a headline crudely circled in smeared red. Perhaps I would have thrown it away, since I wasn’t in the habit of reading newspapers, but what I read on it stopped me. I was destroyed by those words. 

I turned into a puddle of human flesh on the seat of the train on the spot, soaked in my tears.

I stared at nothing until the train stopped at my station. I hesitated, but then desperately ran home through the milling crowd. Tears streamed from my eyes. I bolted up the stairs from the station, and dashed recklessly along the streets to home, disregarding traffic lights. It’s a miracle I survived running so mindlessly and recklessly. Thankfully the motorists’ reflexes were quick, so truck-kun didn’t get me, otherwise this would have become an isekai tale. 

When I reached my apartment building, I dashed up the stairs to my door. I was out of breath, but barely thought about it. I unlocked and yanked it open, my hand trembling and dripping sweat. When I hid inside, I closed it and locked it again. I lost all my energy, falling against my front door. I panted, crying and sweating, all the while screaming loudly, and finally curled up in my tiny genkan.

I ceased to function coherently for a week. 

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