21
Training
I wanted to take the rest of the day off after the Jackalope, but Gary had another idea. My doctor Gina was attempting to turn away visitors, but Gary just brushed past them and stormed right up to my bedside.
“See?”
“See what?” I asked, confused at the goblin's anger.
Gary had been one of the calmest and most reserved of the bunch. He was probably the best fighter when it came to skill, but he always had so little to say that it was easy to forget he was there.
“I told you we needed to train; now everyone had their asses handed to them by a damn rabbit!”
I tried to remember; he had said we needed to train, and a few of the goblins had been doing so. I hadn't ever disagreed with him, so this was a bit out of the blue.
“You're right, we need to train…”
“Of course I’m right, but you aren’t doing anything about it. We have to stand up against the trolls in just a handful of days, but Gale and Gabriel are the only ones who show up at training, and they aren't doing enough.”
I nodded, thinking about that. We had been taking it relatively easy. There had been a couple of hiccups the past couple of days, but otherwise we had just worked on the dungeon and played. But we had what amounted to a war right on our doorstep. Not to mention all the unknowns: the demon, the humans, and now random forest monsters.
“No… You really are right… Geoff, come here a minute?” I called to the other goblin who had been trying to get past the blockade.
The three of us worked out a training schedule. There would be some free time for everyone, but a majority of our days would be spent learning to fight and sparring with one another. It wasn't something I enjoyed, but we had to make the training mandatory, at least for now. Gary was right; we only had days before we had to fight the trolls, the weakest of which eclipsed any of us in levels and strength both. Our own trolls were strong, but they weren’t fighters.
Gary was only partially mollified, though. He wanted us to start immediately, but there were still a few things I needed to do first. Geoff and I went to check out how the humans were handling their losses and the insanity that had just transpired. I sent the rest of the dungeon to train with Gary. For now the training room would be the cable trap room, as it was the largest mostly empty room.
When we made it to the yard, I was shocked at what we found. Hunter was guiding another sled of stripped logs into the dungeon’s area. Geoff had a brief conversation with the man. It was odd being the one to look on and wait while others did the organizing, but this was part of leading. I had to keep in mind what Geoff had said: we all have our roles; this was Geoff's.
When they finished, Geoff returned with a thoughtful expression and gave me the short version.
“They are used to this sort of thing. The humans call this forest ‘the frontier’; it seems that it is particularly dangerous, and people sign up to come out here for the promise of a lot of money. The danger is just part of the job, and they can't afford to stop work every time someone is hurt or lost.
They are going to finish dropping this load off and then return to their village for lunch and to ‘lick their wounds' whatever that means. Then they'll be back to finish the day.”
I wasn't sure if I should be impressed by their tenacity or disturbed by their lack of empathy. Either way, the result was the same; they wouldn't be slowing down their deliveries. I had counted on them going home, at least for the day. With that not being the case, I would have to make sure I timed my plan for dealing with the lumber correctly. I set Geoff to watch the humans and alert me as soon as they returned to the village.
When I returned to the temporary training room, everyone was lined up wielding weapons that I had no part in making. Gary spotted me approaching and looked around a bit before folding his arms and giving me an irritated glare.
“Where is Geoff? Everyone needs to train. Everyone.”
I winced, “I need him to watch the humans; we can take shifts in that role.”
He clearly didn't like that answer, but he didn’t protest further.
Instead he asked, “What weapon do you use?”
“Uhhh, a sword maybe?”
The looks the other goblins gave me from behind Gary's shoulder were enough to tell me that was a bad answer.
“Maybe? What do you mean, maybe? You need to pick a weapon you can use, learn it, and learn to fight with it. This is important!”
I nodded, “Right, sorry. I will use a sword.”
“What kind?”
Shit, I should have thought of that; now I would have to come up with an answer quickly, or else Gary would be pissed again.
“A... a longsword.”
Gary looked at me in silence for a moment.
“You're sure?”
“Of course!" I lied.
The goblin shrugged and waved someone over. Gregg showed up with… something. Calling it a sword would be generous. It was obviously blunted for training, but that would hardly matter as it would be just as lethal as a club. The thing was every bit of four feet long. It wasn't very wide, but a four-foot-long piece of metal would be heavy.
Fortunately, I could tell it was heavy from its size and Gregg struggling to carry it, so I didn't make a fool of myself when I picked it up. I would be able to swing it, but it would tire me out fast. I couldn't let anyone know I had made a mistake, so I nodded and smiled like it was just right. Gary nodded in return and gestured to an unoccupied space near the edge of the room.
“Terry is the only other one who picked a longsword, so you’ll spar and train with him.”
Terry stepped into the empty space holding a copy of my blunted blade. The troll swung it around in one hand like a fly swatter. With a sigh, I took my place across from him, and Gary called out for everyone to begin. I charged the troll, trying to take advantage of my smaller size and quicker feet. I didn't even see the blow coming. One moment I was pulling back my sword to swing for the fences, and the next I was looking at the ceiling wondering what happened. This was going to be a long day. Terry pulled me back to my feet, and we squared off again for round two. An hour or a thousand later, Geoff came hurrying into the room.
“Mr. Rob, the humans just left for the village.”
I somehow found the energy needed to drag myself up off the floor for the fiftieth time and ran from the room. I didn't need to go in person for my plan, but that would hardly stop me from fleeing. Outside, the nearby forest was quiet and abandoned as advertised. I leaned against a wall and just rested for a moment before jumping into the construction interface.
The workers had delivered quite a number of logs, but that wasn't the only thing I wanted to handle right now. First, I cleaned up the mess that the fight with the Jackalope had caused. Broken, twisted metal and ruined stone blocks. I could have done this part with the humans around since they had seen me move the gate and build all of this in an instant anyway. But I was going to continue trying to limit their knowledge as much as possible. Humans were scary enough; giving Shale information on our capabilities was just a bad idea.
Once everything was restored, I moved on to the main attraction: selling the logs. That was when I realized I had messed up. The logs were in the dungeon area; they already counted as part of the dungeon, so I couldn’t ‘sell' them. I could only convert loot into coins after a dungeon wave or invasion. I wanted to smack myself. I had made this exact mistake once before already and had forgotten with all of the other things going on.
Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.
After confirming the cleanup, I spoke to Geoff, who had followed me.
“We… need to figure out something else. I can't convert the logs unless they are brought in with a wave.”
“Why is that a problem?”
“Because they are inside here…”
“So we take them back outside and then bring them back?” he asked.
“Won't work; they count as ours now, so they won't count as loot.”
Geoff held his chin for a moment before he shrugged, “Well, use them as material then; from now on, we bring the logs in ourselves.”
“That will take time and goblins; Gary is already mad that someone has to be up here to watch the humans.”
Lilith came up with the answer, “Have one monster help drag the logs in. That should be enough to count as gained loot; just make sure not to dissolve their carts or anything.”
That seemed like it should work, so I put Geoff on ‘help the humans haul lumber’ duty. Then… returned to the training room, far too soon for my liking. Another hour went by before a message appeared.
Dungeon Minion detected leaving area of influence
Dungeon wave event started
Maximum cumulative level of minions in dungeon wave: 6
Cumulative level of minions in wave: 2
I continued my spar with Terry, but my distraction earned me another devastating thwack. Terry cheered as if he hadn't won every single spar so far. I just didn't seem to be getting better. I continued lying there, observing the others, which had nothing to do with not wanting to get pummeled again. The rest of the minions were also paired off and sparring, with Gary walking amongst them and offering pointers and critiques. I had only been able to glimpse the others as I climbed to my feet between bouts, but they at least seemed to be picking up combat with their chosen weapons. The way the goblins moved made it seem as if they had been training for months, not hours. Then the follow-up message popped up.
Dungeon wave complete
Calculating results…
Adventurers slain: 0
Monsters slain: 0
Damage taken: 0
Damage dealt: 0
Minions slain: 0
Loot lost: none
Loot gained: 4,321 lbs. Raw Wood
Wave duration: 3:17
Wave reward: 2 tin
Loot value: 4 silver 32 copper 10 tin
Convert loot to mana coins?
And now I had to kick myself again. I could convert the logs this way, but then the humans would be feet from the dissolving lumber.
“Shit, I'll be right back."
I started to run back to the surface to try and think up a different solution, but Gary had had enough.
“NO! No more excuses and interruptions, whatever it is can wait! Everyone keep practicing.”
I almost protested and explained what was going on, but the thunderous look in the goblin's eye made me stop. The humans were going to learn of this at some point anyway. Might as well be now, then; maybe Geoff could think of something to explain it away. I confirmed the conversion and went back to training. Terry went back to bludgeoning me for fun.
Eventually Gary demanded that Geoff switch in, and we sent Gabrielle to replace him. She couldn't communicate with the humans, but I explained the situation to her, and Geoff could explain the switch to the humans. And so we trained. The entire day was spent with the goblins practicing and learning their weapons, all while I kept getting beaten to a pulp by Terry. At least the troll didn’t seem to be getting any better either. Not that he needed to be any stronger or faster to slap me across the room.
I was the first to fall at the end of the day. I hadn't been struck this time, but my body just quit obeying me, and I collapsed to the floor. As if he had been waiting for that, Gary clapped his hands and declared to the whole room.
“Well done, that should be enough for today; as soon as the sun rises, everyone needs to be back here again for another round.”
Everyone groaned, and it wasn’t zombie speech. Tessa, who had told Gary she wouldn't be hitting anyone and he hadn't fought her on it, picked me up gently and carried me with the others to the bunk room. No one was in the mood, or even able, to do anything else but rest. The next morning came far too quickly, and the routine continued.
Gary tried to send Gabriel to take over human-helping duty in the morning, but he just glowered and took up his spear, facing off against his sister. Gary looked concerned but sent Gerald instead. Gerald happily complied, tossing his axe down, which sent the resident smith into an apoplectic fit of half-started curses.
Gale had been paired with Gerald and so now didn't have a sparring partner. Geoff replaced the younger goblin as her partner, but the skill disparity was a bit much. It was almost like Terry and Geoff were having a competition to see who could down their opponent faster. Hours passed, and the time came to replace Gerald for the second shift. Gale quickly volunteered, but Gary vetoed that.
“No, Gale, if Gabe doesn't want to take a turn, then it's Gregg’s time to take a break.”
It said something that everyone had agreed that hauling logs was a break from this hellish training. Gregg started to put his war hammer away, but Gale threw her weapon down.
“I’m done. This is a waste of time. I’m not learning anything. If anyone... anyone ELSE needs me, I’ll be in my workshop.”
And the furious goblin stomped off. Gary started to follow, looking just as angry as she had, but I stopped him.
“Wait… she's right, this isn’t working for me either… and she is more useful making traps.”
Gary visibly struggled for a moment with something before waving me over.
“Do you see the progress? In the others I mean.” Gary asked quietly.
I wasn't sure where he was going with this, but I nodded anyway. I had seen the difference; just a day and a bit, and somehow the goblins had visibly improved. They still wouldn't hold a candle to the trolls, but they all looked more skilled. It was strange, too fast.
“Goblins don't live long, so we learn fast to compensate. The change is more obvious when you look at them, but you too are learning very fast. Just as fast as a goblin even.”
That explained some things, but I definitely hadn't been improving at the same pace as the others, and I told him as much.
“The others I can see, but I don't think I’ve improved at all; Terry still smashes me without trying.”
Gary shook his head and chuckled, “You can’t see the difference because Terry is a monster… well, more so than the rest of us. He's three times your size, and I can already see him struggling to land a blow as easily as before.”
“mmm… Maybe, but even so, Terry is small and relatively weak for a troll; we're going to get crushed.”
He nodded, “We have to fight dirty. Watch.
Terry, come spar with me for a minute.”
The troll looked excited to have a new target to beat down. The goblins all stopped their own sparring to watch, and Gary didn't tell them off as he normally would. The two combatants squared off, Gary with a short sword gripped tightly in one hand, Terry with his sword longer than his opponent was tall.
Tessa looked wary but counted the fight down and signaled the start. Terry charged, swinging his sword in a great arc. I recognized the move as one the troll used when he wanted a quick win. Gary didn't move. Terry's blade whistled. If that struck Gary, he would have a broken rib at the minimum.
At the last moment, Gary fell to the floor, the giant blade whizzing inches over his head. Before the troll could swing back the other way, Gary leapt up and flung a handful of dirt and sand into Terry's face. The surprised troll dropped his sword, which skittered across the room, and grabbed his eyes. Gary rushed forward while the troll was blinded and lunged, sword pointed at the troll's throat. A great brown hand closed around Gary's arm, halting his charge. Tessa stared at the goblin with suppressed fury.
I jumped in before someone… Gary really got hurt. “Enough, that’s enough. Gary won; your point is made.”
The goblin grinned madly and shook his head, “Actually, I lost, and Tessa made my point.”
Tessa released his arm and asked, “What? What point?”
“We… most of us anyway, are goblins. We are weak. We have to do whatever is necessary to win.” He pointed at Terry, who was still wiping his eyes, “I did what I had to; I might have won that fight. But Tessa did what she had to. Terry won that fight because he outnumbered his opponent.
We are getting stronger, but we may never match Trolls in a fight. We have to fight like this. Use dirty tricks and help each other.”
He had a point. Though I wasn't going to tell everyone the trolls would also be outnumbering us until we tiered up, perhaps even after that. After that little display, the training changed. We all still fought one on one, but we used the environment and often would even suddenly switch opponents, catching someone off guard. Gale never returned to the training, though, and I wasn't going to press the matter. I hadn't lied when I said she was better as a trap engineer.
On the third day a new guest showed up. Gina was on human duty at the time and came bursting into the training area.
“Rob! Come quick; we have trouble!”
On the surface was quite a scene. Trolls and humans were locked in combat. The trolls held a clear advantage, pressing the unprepared and unarmed workers back into the trees. I called out to stop the fighting, Lilith translating for me, but they ignored me or else didn't hear.
“Greetings, zombie."
The voice came from behind me, next to the dungeon entrance. I whirled to see a bipedal fox man relaxing against the wall, just out of sight from inside the dungeon.
Name: Ezekiel
Classification: Dungeon BW Avatar
Race: Dungeon
Level: 25
“Uhhh, greetings?”
“We are handling your pest problem; no need to thank me.”
“Right… Then I won't thank you. You are… Tina's crown then?”
I only remembered to use the troll chief's fake name at the last moment. The fox man made a disgusted face at the mention of Tina's name.
“Something like that. I’ve come to deliver on our half of the bargain that… Tina… made. We brought some of the more unusual materials we have unlocked. And I am here to look over your dungeon; we need to see what sort of materials you have to offer for the tribute. You only have a short while left after all.”
His words chilled me. He wanted to go into the dungeon. It was bad enough Handy had been outside and he had seen the hell beast, but if we took him inside, he would see all our defenses and secrets. Including the fact that we were far weaker than Kasumi thought we were. It was already going to be a problem trying to explain this away to the humans.
We had to send him away quickly without pissing off his escort of trolls.