The Godspace

*You know I don't like this. This is needless suffering," Galt growled.

"Our little prophet created a new timeline. Reality must be re-balanced. She must do this. We agreed on this before we made this reality," Tiki pronounced.

*She will never be the same after this.*

"She is already different, Galt. You know this, oh knowledgeable one. You can't protect her from this destiny."

*Hasn't she suffered enough?*

"It's a timeline of her own creation, Galt," Gertzpul said. "She needs this moment."

*One wrong step and everything we've set up will come tumbling down.*

"She'll be fine, Galt," Erhonsay said, scratching the cat god under the chin where he liked it the best. "Emily is wise. She will choose the right thing."

*I hope you're right, Sophia. I can't see how the timeline will resolve, so I really hope you're right.*

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Emily, Healing Shrine, Planting Season, 5th rot., afternoon of the 9th day

Lord Skalta haup Black and High Priestess Sutsusum had returned home, so the crowd at the dining table had thinned out a little. Fed was still around because Lisaykos had given her "Emily duty." All the full-fledged healer mages like Twessera and Kibbilpos were still needed to tend to those injured in the fires and the riot. All the trainees had been tasked to help with various recovery efforts, like running errands, helping to feed the displaced, and filling in on Emily Duty. Having a full-time Cosm attendant at my beck and call was so frustrating when I could take care of myself by myself just fine. I needed to talk to Lisaykos about this. I wasn't an invalid any more.

The silverhairs at the dining room table tired me out with their interrogation after mid repast. They sucked my brain dry about my thoughts on settling displaced spoot slaves and Impotu refugee slaves in the valleys to the west of the Great Cracks. Moxsef was especially interested in my idea and told me her shrine would do all it could to help me achieve my goals.

In reflection, that made sense to me. Moxsef was the owner of an obsolete workforce. Despite her original doubts about me, her distrust, and her bad attitude about Coyn, she accepted that she had a responsibility toward the spoot slaves she controlled. I wasn't sure I would ever warm to Moxsef, but I grew to respect her at that moment. She chose the right action to help those under her care. That was a big decision because I knew she could have chosen to just cut off all her spoot slaves once Aylem destroyed the Great Crystal of Control at the White Shrine.

Moxsef and I had just agreed to consult with the Bountiful Shrine of Mueb about how many farms and ranches the five valleys would support when Kamagishi grabbed her head and screamed.

When the scream stopped, she said through gritted teeth, "Everything just changed. I mean, everything." Then she fainted.

I never saw Lisaykos move as fast as she did at that moment, concern etched into the deep frown on her face. She put her hand on Kamagishi's head and tranced briefly. "She'll be alright. The force of the precognition was more than she could withstand. I will cast a deep sleep on her with the hope that she can sleep through the worst of the effects. While I do that, Aylem, will you check on Losnana?"

Silence reigned while Lisaykos and Aylem cast their magic. Then Lisaykos lifted the unconscious Kamagishi out of her chair and carried her into her bedroom next door. Aylem's eyes fully opened as she came out of her trance. Still, she waited for Lisaykos to rejoin us at the table before speaking.

Once Lisaykos sat down, Aylem began, "Losnana was with Mieth down in the Great Hall. They were both working, with Mieth healing victims and Losnana helping her navigate the maze of mattress pads and providing her with additional magic force. Losnana is conscious but is currently decomposed from the force of a sudden precognition. The healers are bringing her upstairs to her room. I advise we attempt the charm of deep sleep on her, for she is not coherent."

"This is not good," Lisaykos pinched her nose. "I have the feeling something momentous is going to happen, and our two most powerful precognisant mages have just been flattened by it."

"What can we do?" Imstay asked, wearing a grim face.

"Alert the garrison to be prepared for an event whose nature we do not yet know," said Lord Katsa. "That's all we can do for now. We cannot take more specific steps without details on what is about to happen. All we can do is wait for it to arrive. In the meantime, we should continue doing what we must right now: house the newly homeless, feed the hungry, and clean up the mess from the fire."

"That's right," I climbed down from my chair. "The Revered Katsa is correct. All we can do is hurry up and wait. While we do that, I'm going to take a walk. Does anyone other than Aylem want to come with me?"

"What?" Aylem flashed me a sharp look. "It's too dangerous for you to go gallivanting about the city the day after a riot. Besides that, why can't I come?"

"Because you're very pregnant with twins, girlfriend," I replied, reminding myself not to snap at Aylem, who didn't react well to bickering. The only reason Lyappis wasn't here keeping an eye on Aylem's temper was because every healer was needed. Lyappis in the wards tending to fire victims. Aylem's healing prowess was being saved for the very worst cases because of her pregnancy.

"My back may ache, but I can walk, Em," Aylem swallowed her ire and tried not to snap at me. "But you shouldn't go into the city today. The adepts haven't finished with all the compelled Coyn yet, and the population is restless and unsettled."

I was shocked. "Aylem, you mean some of the Coyn have been sitting on the ground overnight under the force of that terrible compulsion, in the cold and w...without food, waiting for an adept to free them? Do you have any idea of w...what that compulsion feels like? I got caught by your compulsion yesterday for only a fraction of a bell, and even that was, w...was...," I had to stop talking briefly, and slapped the side of my face to stop the stutter. It had been a while since I last had a stuttering attack.

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I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and started the Ud trick of holding it while I counted to ten slowly. Someone knelt next to my chair while I did that and then hugged me.

"You are shaking, Emily," Lisaykos' voice said softly next to my ear so only I could hear it. "Are you going to be alright, dear hear? I've never seen an aura turn silver before, but that's what yours has done, and every godmark is shining as bright as Gimbel's Star."

"Emily, love," Aylem's voice was calm and suddenly right next to me, "You misunderstood me, or maybe I wasn't clear enough. I sent all Coyn to their homes last night if they still had one, or to the tent city set up across the river if they lost their lodging. I changed the compulsion for the Coyn not yet released by the adepts. They were now compelled to assemble this morning for examination by the adepts in the fields across the river."

I didn't realize I was shaking until Lisaykos wrapped me in her arms. For reasons I didn't understand, I had grabbed onto her with the cloth of her gown clutched in my fists. My eyes were closed, leaking tears, and my head was buried in her shoulder. The memory of Aylem's compulsion was that frightening to me. I had not realized it had scared me that much.

My damn brain, which can never stay still even when upset, wondered if too much power was why Ud was a self-proclaimed pacifist

"I think that's part of it," Aylem replied, reading my mind. Damn monster.

She heard that thought, too, because she sighed with genuine regret. I felt a small raft of guilt that I had hurt her once again amidst the ocean of my upset feelings.

Aylem caressed my head as I was engulfed in Lisaykos' arms. I turned my head and looked at her. One tear was slowly falling down her cheek.

"Why, little one?" Aylem asked me. "Why do you insist on putting yourself in harm's way? You are so special and so important, and it's so dangerous out there for you. The streets are unsettled right now, with fights starting here and there, and the guards needing to quell both upset Cosm and Coyn. It's just not safe. All we want to do is protect you."

The expression on her face pleaded with me. I knew she wanted to keep me from harm and that her feelings came from her concern for me. I felt like the cat in that famous Edwin Arlington Robinson poem about New England: "Conscience always has the rocking-chair, cheerful as when she tortured into fits the first cat that was ever killed by care."

I struggled to compose myself, and then steeled myself to tell these overgrown, overpowered mages that I chose to walk into harm's way, even if it was dangerous. No life was without risks. No place was completely safe. Being free meant sometimes accepting risk and knowingly walking into danger.

I pushed myself out of Lisaykos' embrace, and to her credit, she let me. Out of all the Cosm I knew, I think she understood how much I needed my freedom from her protection. I had realized she always left at least one door open for me to escape, deliberately, though it pained her to do so. The look she gave me when I pushed her away was heartbreaking. Of all the people in that room, she was the one who had learned the hard way that you can't own the love of another.

"Can you cast the lost charm of tongues, Aylem?" I asked.

"Of course."

"Cast it, please."

She looked at me funny, and then I felt the charm zing through me like a tingling wave. From the looks on everyone's faces, she cast it on the entire room.

"During the Blitz, in September 1940, the Nazis bombed Buckingham Palace," I said in English because Fosk lacked the words I wanted. I knew what I wanted to convey, especially if I visualized the images of bombed-out London for this roomful of silverhairs who would see them passively in my head without trying. "It didn't get into the papers at the time, but the Queen of England remarked that while it was frightening, she could now look the people of London's East End in the face. The East End, if you recall, was the hardest hit area of London, with thousands dead. It was almost as bad as the bombing of Coventry, where you were killed two months later."

"What's a month?" Imstay interrupted.

"Three rotations," Aylem said. "Now, shush. Emily's talking."

I sighed. Imstay was good at interrupting.

I continued. "After the bombings, the King and Queen walked the streets, inspecting the damage, talking with people, and being seen. They showed the people their concern for them by simply being there. It's a leadership thing, Jane. It has a ripple effect because people will tell others they have seen their leaders in the act of caring for them. Done right, it's like magic because it reassures people that their leaders care.

"The same thing happened when Eleanor Roosevelt visited the Bonus Army Camp of veterans outside of Washington D.C. during the Depression. President Hoover sent the U.S. Army to shoo them away after they marched on the city, demanding their war bonuses they hadn't received. It didn't work. It only made the unrest worse. When President Roosevelt took office, he sent his wife, Eleanor, alone to the Bonus Army Camp with one of his lieutenants to drive the car. The unrest was stopped cold because Eleanor employed the leadership of concern.

"I want to walk the streets of Aybhas, Aylem," I tried to look my most convincing and used my best cajoling voice. "The people are unsettled and need assurance. Despite my dislike of being stuck as a prophet, I feel I need to do this. My fellow Coyn are unhappy. They are hungry and upset. For them, their future is uncertain. No one has told them their leaders are looking out for them, so I will. I must. To use a Yankee expression, as you would put it, you Brit, it's time to press the flesh, not to be elected, but to simply be seen in the act of concern. I'm surprised you don't get this."

"Yes, it made a difference that the King and Queen didn't flee London during the bombing," Aylem replied in English. "I didn't know about First Lady Roosevelt. The news on my end side of the Atlantic was filled with the Abdication, the big strikes, Franco, Hitler, and Mussolini."

"It's kinda famous in American history that Hoover sent the army, but Roosevelt sent his wife. It's a lesson in both charisma and public relations."

The room was silent as Aylem studied the floor.

"Hey, Aylem," I switched back to Fosk, "I was wrong. You are indeed fit to walk, though your back and legs won't forgive if you do. So, walk with me through the streets of Aybhas. You should come too, Imstay, and Lisaykos, and Moxsef. You, Moxsef, should go and talk with your spoot workers, to tell them they will get fed, even if food is short right now before the new crops start coming in. And they need to know that their shrine will help them with life after slavery because that's a big uncertainty that needs to go away. What's with the face, Holy One?"

Moxsef looked like she had a toothache, "I don't know if I can do that. I've never talked much with the spoot slaves. What would I say to them? Other than making sure their overseers don't abuse them, I have had very little to do with them." She looked a bit panicked.

"You've never talked much with...," I was gobsmacked. Moxsef owned the largest population of slaves in the kingdom and didn't interact with them at all? She didn't speak with her Coyn much? I suddenly understood why Moxsef might have problems with Coyn. I might be the Coyn she had spoken to the most, which was an appalling thought. Just how isolated was she from the everyday lives of her own shrine's slaves if she never even talked with them?

"Dammit, Vassu," I thought, "your avatar in Foskos could use some help."

*Yes, Little Emily, I can put the right words to say into her head when she needs them,* Vassu's voice said inside my head.

"I heard that," Moxsef's face blanched.

"I believe we all did," said Lord Katsa, who gave me an inquiring look. "Do the gods talk to you much, Great One?"

"Not all the time," I confessed. "They were in my head a lot right after the trial in Truvos, but they've been quiet while I've been in Inkalem and Sussbesschem. I find it unsettling if I think about it, so I've gotten excellent at not thinking about it. Otherwise, I think I might go insane from paranoia."

Aylem broke into a teasing smile, "Well, dear heart, hearing voices in your head back on Earth was considered a sign of insanity."

I glared at her. "Yes, thank you for reminding me of that, Aylem dearest."