All day Tuesday, Lolly thought about Trevor and wondered how his race had gone. Honestly, she didn't expect him to win or place, but she hoped he enjoyed his run and set a good personal time. That night when the phone rang, she knew it was him. She didn’t know how she knew, she just did. She said, “Hello.”
In a tired voice, Trevor responded, “Hey Lolly.”
She started to ask him about the race, but thought better of it. “Hey, how are you?”
“Beat.”
“Yeah.”
Without a word about the run, he asked, “How are you?”
She answered honestly, “I’m okay. I missed you today.”
“I missed you too. I was hoping to ask you out Friday, but my stupid parents have connected with a realtor. They are looking at beach front properties, so we won’t be home until Sunday evening."
Several thoughts ran through Lolly’s head simultaneously. First was how was she going to tell him she couldn’t date for another six months. The second thought she said out loud, “You guys aren’t moving again are you?”
“Who knows. Dad says its just a vacation home. A place to go in the summer, which would be cool but couldn’t they just buy one some other time?” He paused, then said, “I wish you were here.”
Never had she heard him this low before. Though he hadn’t mentioned his race, she decided to ask, “How was your race?”
His voice broke, when he said, “Bad. I was so embarrassed, I came in dead last. DEAD LAST. I've never been last before. It was such a terrible feeling.”
Lolly took in a slow breath of air, before she said, “You've also never been in a Texas Regional Cross Country Race. You are faster than so many guys in this huge state.”
“I would have been happy if even one guy had been slower than me.”
“Yeah, I know. I’m sorry. Still, I’m really proud of you.”
“Why?”
“Because you finished the race. You knew you were gonna lose but you still finished. Finishing is always the hardest part.”
He was silent for a few seconds before he said, “I guess so.”
“I know so.”
Trevor yawned. “I wish I could talk longer but my dad is timing me. Five lousy minutes. He can go buy a beach house, but he thinks a long distance phone call is too expensive. Go figure. Anyway, it was so good to hear your voice. Talk to you soon. Bye."
“Bye.” Lolly hung up the phone and stared out the window. Fear was nibbling at her. A fear she did not quite understand. Trevor would kiss her soon, a real kiss. It would change her life. Most girls her age had already been kissed. She had zero experience. Shouldn’t she be excited? She was, but she was more terrified than excited.
*
The lights in Aunt Jessie’s living room were down low. Bruno was snoring on the couch beside her. Lolly sat in the recliner. All the guests had gone home. Grandma Toady and Mitzi were washing dishes in the kitchen. Max had gone over to Kevin’s. Now was the time for Lolly to talk to Aunt Jessie about Mitzi being reinstated in the fashion show. On the stereo Joni Mitchell was singing the saddest Christmas song Lolly had ever heard. Aunt Jessie sang along, “I'm so hard to handle/I'm selfish and I'm sad/Now I've gone and lost the best baby/That I ever had.” Lolly wondered if she were singing about Uncle Luke. She also wondered who Joni Mitchell was singing about. Why did love have to end? Did it have to? Some people managed to keep it alive.When the song was over Aunt Jessie wiped her eyes with her sleeve and gave Lolly a watery smile. “How ya doing kiddo?”
“I’m okay. How are you?”
“Waterworks.” She sniffed, stroked Bruno and continued, “When Dad left, he left. There wasn’t any split holidays or shared custody. He was gone and Mama kept going. I didn’t understand how she did it. Luke would never leave his kids like that, ever. I think Max is going to move in with him once he turns fourteen.” She sighed and looked out the window.
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As usual, Lolly had no idea what to say. She let a few silent moments hang between them, and then, she told Aunt Jessie about Mitzi smuggling Puccini into her back pack.
Aunt Jessie gave Lolly a sideways look. “So, I am guessing you think her kindness should get her back into Munch's show.”
“Yes.”
“What the hell. Okay. It will make her happy, Munch happy and God knows somebody needs to be happy around here. But do me a favor, let’s tell her tomorrow. She needs to be able to sleep tonight.”
“Okay."
Later, as Grandma Toady and Lolly walked home, the stars were bright in the sky. Grandma Toady had linked her arm through Lolly's. "Well," she said, "We survived another Thanksgiving. It was nice to have Estelle and Munch over. I just wish your Pa had been there, along with a few of my other children."
As much as Lolly missed Pa, she was thankful he was not there. It would have been so complicated and she would have been torn between him and Munch. As for the other children, Grandma Toady had referred to, Uncle Terry was in heaven. Aunt Jules lived in Pennsylvania. Every other year she and her stuck up kids came down for Christmas. Uncle Beau lived in Canada. He had left the country when his number came up in the draft. He didn't even call on holidays. It seemed he had taken a page from his father's book by abandoning his family. And, then there was Aunt Michelle. She had been an Army nurse in Saigon. After her tour of duty she took her vows and become a Carmelite Nun in Italy. She wrote once a month, but had not been home in years.
*
Friday morning Lolly got her stitches out. she did not look at the scar. Friday afternoon she stood in front of her closet. Mitziwas with Aunt Jessie. Every article of clothing in Lolly's closet taunted her. The phone rang. From the rummage room Grandma Todady asked, “Aren’t you going to answer that?”
Lolly went to the kitchen and picked up the phone. Mitzi said, “Hello Lolly, this is Mitzi. I want tell you THANK YOU for getting me back in Munch's show. Puccini and I will be FOREVER grateful."
"Your welcome."
"Now, come over.”
“Why?”
Mitzi asked, “How long have you been staring in your closet?”
“Not long,” Lolly lied.
“Right. I can help you IF you want to be helped. Do you?”
The answer was obvious as well as embarrassing. What was she gonna have to do, tote Mitzi around the rest of her life to pick out her clothes? It was ridiculous. “Okay, I’ll come over.”
“Good.” Mitzi slammed the phone down. The sound hurt Lolly’s ear.
Lolly went into the living room and grabbed her hooded sweatshirt. Outside the afternoon sun was a clear bright ball. The shadows were just beginning to lengthen. In the street, Max and Kevin were playing Frisbee. Lolly sucked at Frisbee. The disk, never went where she wanted it to. Mitzi stood on the porch steps with Puccini in her arms. She looked at her little wrist as if she was wearing a watch and said, “Well that took like almost forever. Why do you walk so slow?”
Lolly did not answer. Inside the trailer, she was greeted by the ever overly affectionate pitbull, Bruno. “Down boy, down.” He slobbered a big kiss across her face.
In a voice that demanded obedience, Aunt Jessie said, “Stop. Sit.” To Lolly’s amazement, Bruno actually did. Aunt Jessie said, “Good boy,” and gave him a dog biscuit.
With a wave of her hand, Mitzi said, “This way.” She lead Lolly to Aunt Jessie’s bedroom.
Lolly asked, “Do we have permission to be in here?”
Mitzi gave her a side glance, like she had just asked a stupid question. She went straight into her mom’s closet. Aunt Jessie tastes ran more toward solids with curve hugging lines. Lolly protested, “I can’t wear your Mom’s clothes. They don’t fit.” Again, Mitzi gave her a side glance. Slowly, she began her magic. She brushed her hand across her mom’s blouses and stopped. She pulled out an outfit Lolly had not seen in a long time. It was one Pa had brought Aunt Jessie back from Vietnam. It was deep blue Ao Dai** with yellow and red embroidery. It was too beautiful to wear. “I can’t wear that.”
“Why not?”
“Your mom won’t let me.”
Mitzi threw back her head and hollered, “MAMA WOULD YOU COME IN HERE?”
Aunt Jessie shouted back, “What have I told you about yelling in the house?”
“NOT TO DO IT!”
Aunt Jessie came into the room and asked, “What is it my banshee?”
Mitzi held up the Ao Dai and said, “This only thing in your closet that won’t sag on Lolly. So, she can wear this, right?” Though it was posed as a question it sounded more like a command.
“The question is does Lolly want to wear it?”
Aunt Jessie looked at Lolly. They both knew it was not going to the movies appropriate. Lolly was afraid Mitzi's was about to blow her reinstatement into the fashion show if she did not get her way. Aunt Jessie said, “If it fits you can have it."
Have it? "Wow thanks." Lolly went to the bathroom and slipped it on. She was immediately transported to a different place and time. It fit her perfectly. The way the slits hit her hips was just right. The long pants beneath it were comfortable and so soft. Munch would love it, but she doubted she would ever have the guts to wear it in public.
The door banged open and Mitzi asked, “Well?”
“It is beautiful.”
“Of course it is. Are you going to wear it?” There was a challenge in Mitzi’s eyes.
“Uh, I don’t think so.”
“Chicken!” Then, she started clucking.
“Stop it.”
Mitzi didn't stop. Instead, she started flapping her arms like they were wings while Puccini flailed in the air.
Aunt Jessie came into the bathroom and shushed Mitzi. She looked at Lolly and said, “You look beautiful. So do you want it?"
She did very much. Now, she had to come up with a reason not to wear it. Mitzi eyes were eager, hopeful and threatening. A solution popped into Lolly's head. "I love it, but I want to save it to wear it to Pa's wedding"
Mitzi's mouth formed a perfect O. Light sparked in them. She squealed, "Yes!" Crisis avoided. Mitzi took Lolly's hand and said, "Let's go back to your house. I gotta pick something out for you to wear to the movies with Lisa. Max and Kevin thinks she's hot."
Aunt Jessie asked Lolly, "Do you want her?"
Lolly looked at Mitzi and smiled. "I do."