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Living it for the Plot
Chapter 28: Down with the (horny) bourgeoisie!

Chapter 28: Down with the (horny) bourgeoisie!

I stood inside the phone booth feeling giddy. It took me some time to flip through the pages of the massive yellow book to find the number I was looking for, but it was worth it. It was worth every second spent.

I’d silently declared war against the mob for what they did to Hiroi and I, and I never thought I’d get the chance to do anything about it so soon! The excitement was giving me the shakes, but I forced down the jitters with a deep breath, letting my voice fill with a sense of calm. I dialed the number.

“Hello, Atlantic City Labor Collective, how may I help you?” asked a soft voice from the other end.

“I’m so glad you picked up!” I exclaimed through the phone, enunciating my words with a dramatic flair. “I didn’t know who else to turn to!”

“Woah, if it’s an emergency, you should call 911,” replied the woman from the other end.

“Wha- oh, no! Nothing like that,” I said, feeling my cheeks redden. After taking a second to calm myself down once again, I continued. “One of the local banks has been having a lot of trouble with their management and their incredibly toxic policies, so they were looking to unionize.”

“That’s wonderful! Could you please provide some more information so we can get in touch with them?”

“Yeah, I’m actually the one who convinced them to do this! They’re meeting tonight at 8 pm in the Atlantic City public library, conference room 2. Do you think you could send someone over?”

“Of course! It’s somewhat short notice, but there are a few of us who are available at that time. I’ll pencil someone in to show up then. Thanks again, uh…”

“M-Marty. Marty McSchmiddt.” I wasn’t about to paint a target on my back, no matter how many levels I might gain by the time the mob figured it out.

“Alright then Mr. McSchmiddt, thank you for showing more of corporate America’s workers that they deserve to be treated well.”

The lady hung up.

With a beaming smile, I headed back to my car to grab lunch, and plan out what I was going to say and do at tonight’s meeting.

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“Crap crap crap!” I shouted as I tore asphalt on the way to the library.

It was ten minutes to eight, and if I wouldn’t get pulled over, I’d make it right on time.

After finishing the call, I’d gone out for lunch and went to make an account at the local credit union. I eventually came back to my apartment to take a nap, so I could catch up on the extra sleep I missed out on from being up so late and waking up so early yesterday and today. Apparently that nap somehow turned into a several hour long food coma, and I was hauling ass to make up for it.

By some miracle, I made it to the library parking lot completely unmolested by law enforcement. I got out of my car and headed inside the building. It was thankfully easier to navigate than the one in Newark, and I found the meeting spot quite easily.

I let out a sigh of relief when I saw that the meeting was going ahead despite my little stunt that morning. The conference room that the bank teller reserved was quite spacious, with several dozen chairs laid out throughout the hall floor and a small podium standing at the front. The walls and door were soundproofed and entirely opaque, to prevent any loud noises from disturbing the patrons outside.

And the best part, the flooring was entirely made up of incredibly delicate carpeting, probably some kind of velour that was soft enough to have someone be dragged across it at breakneck speeds while buck naked without suffering even a lick of carpet burn! All in all, it was the perfect place to host a union meeting.

I passed several people, men and women, who looked around the room with a mix of apprehension and excitement. Most of them were wearing trench coats or long overcoats, which was strange as it wasn’t that cold outside. Maybe they just wanted to dress nicely for the event?

“Mike, Mike!” shouted a familiar voice. The teller who helped me earlier ran up to me with another man in tow. “I’m so glad you made it! I can’t believe we’re really doing this, huh?” she asked in a frantic, yet excited voice. It was like looking at a young puppy playing with a squeaky toy for the first time.

“Of course, I wouldn’t miss this for the world!” I replied with a similar look of elation. “I’ll wait for everyone else to arrive, along with a special guest, and then we can get started.”

“Ooh, sounds hot! By the way, this is my husband, Rick. He was pretty hesitant about this entire thing, but I was able to convince him to come.”

“Well, I’m glad! Nice to meet you, Rick.” I held out my hand to shake, which he copied with a limp grip. I frowned. But more so because looking at him felt like I was actually like looking in a mirror.

“Oh, Rick, don’t be scared,” replied his wife. “We’ll be together through this, every step of the way!”

I nodded to the two and excused myself. It was good that she realized I was talking about setting up a labor union without me actually having said so. But what else could it have been? I chuckled to myself as I made my way to the podium.

Several more guests had arrived, including the union representative, so I decided to kick things off.

“Hello everyone, members of Atlantic City bank!” I said into the microphone, channeling my Charisma into the device as it reverberated across the room followed by a staccato static sourced from the relatively primitive sound system.

Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

“Yeah!” shouted the teller, with a fist raised into the air.

“I’m glad you could all make it, and how incredibly brave each and every one of you are for showing up here tonight. But I can assure you, that bravery is about to pay off with the best thing that’ll ever happen in your professional lives.”

“Right, so without further ado, I’d like to introduce-”

Before I could complete my sentence, the teller ripped off her trench coat to unveil a set of incredibly revealing lingerie. Several of the audience members did the same with similar gusto.

I stood in stunned silence as my brain blue screened. If there was a mirror here, looking into it would’ve only showed a ghost. I was pale. I was dead and I was in hell.

The union representative, who was standing behind me, tapped my shoulder and gave me an utterly befuddled glance. So at least I wasn’t the only one.

I turned back to the crowd, made eye contact with the teller, and asked a very simple question in an unnaturally calm voice. “Uh, what the fuck are you doing?”

“We’re doing exactly what me and everyone else came here to do, silly!” she replied exuberantly, the adrenaline that was flowing through her veins making her voice sound shrill. “To take part in the orgy you organized! So that we’d all get comfortable with the idea of having sex with our VIP clients! I mean, that’s what you brought us here for, right?”

I just stared ahead with my mouth open. I could’ve sworn I felt something along my chin, I think it was the floor.

“Right?”

“Of course not! What the hell made you think I was talking about an orgy?!”

“I mean, you said it like-”

My mind went back to earlier that day, and to the specific wording I’d used, as well as the teller’s reactions. Fine, some of the phrases I used could’ve been interpreted that way, but why the hell did she actually think I was talking about that? Wait, I didn’t come up with all of those words myself.

“Oh for fuck’s sake, Charisma…”

“So what did you mean back then?” she asked.

“I was talking about getting you all unionized,” I said slowly, all of my previous enthusiasm long gone. “I even invited a local union representative here to talk you through the process. Hey, rep, do you want to put me out of my misery?”

The man behind me nervously stepped forward and accepted the microphone. The other audience members hurriedly closed their coats over their bodies, buttoning them back up with reddened faces. Apparently, the two of us were the only ones who’d come here expecting something other than an orgy.

“Thanks Marty,” said the man as he awkwardly looked upon the bank employees. “So, thanks again for being here tonight, everyone.”

Someone in the audience let out a single cough, and the rep gave him a few seconds to let anything else out. It created an awkward pause. I had the urge to start coughing too to cover it up with something.

“His name is Mike!” shouted the teller. “M-I-K-E Mike Smith. Where’d you get Marty?”

Well, so much for staying anonymous.

“My mistake! So as Mike here told me, you’re all dealing with a terrible work environment that’s been perpetuated by the management. One of the perks of a labor union is to fight against that kind of thing! Through the power of collective bargaining, we can force their hand and get all sorts of benefits, including a workplace free from sexual harassment.”

The members of the audience, finally recovering from their embarrassment, began nodding along to the representative’s speech. He went over many fine points about the intricacies of setting up and benefiting from labor unions, most of which I blanked out for.

“And that’s about everything you need to know,” said the rep, seemingly ready to conclude his speech. “Since unions are all about teamwork, how about a team building exercise before you all get going?”

I considered what we’d all be doing. Maybe one of those stereotypical trust falls that were always shown on TV?

“Since it seems that everyone’s already dressed for the occasion, how about an orgy?”

I sat up from my folding chair, eyes bugging out. Son of a-

“Mike, since you’re the one who brought us together, how about if you take the lead?” asked the union representative.

I looked at him and then the others, my expression unchanging.

“Yeah Mike!” exclaimed the teller from earlier. “You’re the real VIP client! Come on down and let us show you a good time!”

You know what? Orgies weren’t my thing. I didn’t even know any of these people, let alone what diseases they could’ve been carrying. So it was time for me to make a cool exit.

“You know, I appreciate the spotlight, but this isn’t my show,” I replied slowly. “It’s yours. This is your union, I’m just the guy who helped you come together. My work here is done, so I’m going to get going. Good luck with your union!”

Some of the members tried to speak up and get me to stay, but I was out the door before I could hear anything coherent.

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As I sat in my car, driving down the moonlit road, I had time to calm my heart to the rhythm of the passing streetlights.

Things kind of went overboard towards the end, and it honestly felt like the world was doing everything in its power now to get me laid. But if it wanted that for me so badly, then it should’ve sent a woman who was actually single and had more character traits than just being horny. Not that being horny was an actual character trait in the first place.

I looked at the passenger’s seat, and the small pile of books lying there. Scholarly articles about the System I’d checked out from the library. A groan escaped my lips.

Whatever. And with the new job I’d hopefully be getting, along with my name on all of the employees’ lips, I wasn’t going to have much free time, let alone for a relationship.

I clenched my fists around the steering wheel. When this was over, I was going to get that normal life, no matter what it took.

[Level Up! (7)]

[Str: +0 | Con: +0 | End: +0 | Cha: +1 | Atr: +1 | Dex: +0 | Int: +1]

[Str: 13 | Con: 16 | End: 14 | Cha: 18 | Atr: 11 | Dex: 13 | Int: 17]

[Skill Level Up! Revenge lv 5 -> 6]