Mums the Mummy was a monster on a mission rushing to the front of the house as fast as his rickety legs would take him. One moment he was enjoying some peace and quiet, the next his turf was under full assault from trespassers who liked to talk smack. This was no way to treat anybody, much less an ancient with an attitude.
“Just you wait, you brats! I’m gonna make Mumm-Ra look like Skeletor!” He leaped over the railing and landed with a thud and the rattling of his bones under his wraps and leathery skin. He could hear the thundering footsteps of the other kids coming from the back of the house towards the front. He positioned himself in front of the only exit, and got ready to lunge.
“Now prepare yourself for my Ancient! Egyptian! Wrath!”
The front door all but exploded off its hinges, crashing into Mums’ back and launching him across the room. The undead creature was pitched like a ragdoll into and over a nearby couch, as Dipper and Mabel walked in.
Dipper looked at the door, then at Mabel. “Those family kickboxing lessons have really been coming in handy this year.”
Mabel posed arms akimbo with her chest thrust out. “I vow to only use my terrible power for good!”
Dipper looked around the living room, quickly making the same observation Drew and the others had. “There’s definitely someone or something here.”
Mabel wrinkled her nose. “Whoever it is needs to work on cleaning it, pronto. It smells like old jerky and dirty blankets.”
“So, like the Mystery Shack.”
Her eyebrows jolting up, Mabel realized he was right. “Huh, takes me back.”
Rapid thumping was all the warning they had before Van and Trip spilled out into the foyer. Van threw his flashlight back down the hallway they came from as Trip scrambled past Dipper and Mabel to bolt out the doorless entrance.
“Darren! Get us out of here!” Trip shrieked.
Van hardly noticed the Pines either, hollering at the top of his lungs on his way out after his brother.
The twins watched them go, then turned to face the emerging threat they fled. The man's well styled hair was out of place, his eyes glowing red with fury, and his mouth filled with razor sharp teeth he was dying to sink into something. Gazing upon the two, he grinned as he found just that.
“Good day to you, morsels~” He greeted.
Mabel pointed at the man. “VAMPIRE!”
Dipper didn’t hesitate, digging a hand into his shorts pocket. “I got it!”
He whipped a handful of pennies onto the floor at the monster’s feet.
The vampire looked down at the pennies, and then back up at the two. The red in his eyes receded and his teeth became less threatening, but his mouth remained twisted into a sneer.
“Now why did you go and do that?!” He looked down at the pennies again. “There has to be at least what… a hundred fifty, two hundred pennies there?!”
Dipper gestured at the pennies. “Why don’t you count to be sure?”
The vampire gestured with melodramatic flair. “I will, but when I’m done, I’m devouring you both!”
Falling to his hands and knees, the vampire began gathering up the pennies, audibly counting them one by one. Taking the opportunity, Dipper and Mabel edged around him and headed for the stairs.
“Okay, so there’s a vampire in the house; hopefully we’ll find Roland and his friends before any others get them.” Dipper couldn’t stop himself from smiling as his thoughts raced. There’s a vampire in the house. This place is amazing! What other weird stuff is just sitting around here?!
With the vampire studiously counting each penny, organizing them by date stamped and cleanliness, Mums pulled himself up from behind the couch and shook the cobwebs out of his head. He looked down at the vampire and threw his hands up in disbelief. “Fangula. What. Are. You. Doing?!”
Muttering numbers to keep his place, Fangula answered. “I am counting these carelessly spilled coins.”
“Stop that! There are trespassers!”
Fangula shot up and pointed at him. “Don’t you dare! You know how important this is to me!”
“More important than the brats turning the house upside down?!”
“We can eat them later, I’m busy!” Fangula went back to his penny counting and stopped. “Wait, is this a copper ‘43?!”
The vampire examined it closely, eyes gleaming red. “Oh no, just an altered ‘45. Curses! I lost my count!”
Mums palmed his desiccated face. “Set, give me strength.”
Outside, Trip and Van were shrieking like much younger children as they ran up the path from Hillhurst. Trip led the way, in speed and volume. “DARIUS! PICK ME UP!”
Van grabbed and shoved Trip aside to pass him, because he didn’t need to be faster than any monsters–just faster than his brother. “Hurry, they’re gonna kill me!”
Dudley, who had been waiting faithfully behind the house, pulled around and slowly followed them up the path. The weathered old chauffeur sported a grin that the (borderline illegal) tinted windscreen of his vehicle concealed well.
“Dunston! Where are you?!” Trip yelled; his pants heavily soaked.
Likely checked into a hotel, Dudley thought as he overtook them.
“Look there he is!” Van and Trip began pounding on the windows of the SUV. “Derrick! Dorian!! Come on, you have to answer one of them! Let us in! I want to go home! I want my Mom!”
“Your Mom’s in Reno, Van!” Trip snapped at his brother.
Moments like these honestly made this vile, thankless job worth it. Peering past his young charges, Dudley could see two young women peeking from the old vineyard, filming every moment with their phones.
Yes, Dudley quite liked his job, and the pay wasn’t too bad either. Alas, if he allowed his young masters to break the windows of the car, the repairs would come from that pay. Lamenting the end to the nicest day on his job so far, Dudley pressed the unlock button on his remote and let Trip and Van spill in so he could leave this place.
Misao sighed as she continued filming as the SUV pulled off. “If I wasn’t avoiding social media today, I’d be posting this everywhere.”
Janna was posting it everywhere. “Don’t worry, Pony, I’ve got your back.”
This pleased Misao. “Today keeps getting better. All it needs to be perfect is for none of my new friends to die. They’ve been in there for a while, now.”
“They’ll be fine; did you see big girl’s kick? I wish I could break down doors like that… I have to go through windows or spend money on lock picks.”
“If nothing happens in the next five minutes, I’m going to call their Grandfather.”
Help support creative writers by finding and reading their stories on the original site.
A strange, magical sound caught Misao and Janna’s attention, and they looked to their left towards the far edge of the vineyard–just in time to see a green flash of light and a puff of smoke. Another flash followed, and Janna’s eyes lit up.
“Or you might not have to.”
“What is that?” Misao asked, concerned by the lights.
“Heavy artillery. Hold down the fort, shortstack. I’m gonna go grab it.”
Misao watched Janna go and looked back towards the house. “She’s nice.”
@@@@@
A hill away from Hillhurst, Star hummed in frustration as she aimed her wand at a can of creamed corn sitting on top of a stump. The can, the stump, and the grass around it were covered in the green glitter sludge she and Marco spent the entire morning cleaning up. Aside from the one successful use of Radiant Shadow Transform that turned Marco into Princess Marco, it still hasn’t worked. Even her spells selflessly devoted to the smash face club were screwing up.
“Laser Beam Blast!” A stream of glittery sludge erupted from her wand, splattering all over the stump and the can without so much as rocking it.
Frowning, Star twirled around in place and pointed the wand at the can again. “Shooting Star Explosion!”
The wand burped out a trio of sickly green stars that landed with wet plops around the stump and bubbled instead of exploding.
Grimacing, Star gripped her wand tighter. “Come… on!”
She jumped, twirled through the air, and landed on the ground. “MEGA NARWHAL BLAST!”
What came out of the wand was best left unwritten, but it even made Star sick to look at it.
Marco had to turn away and run to a bush to retch. Fortunately, the thing dissolved into glittery sludge by the time he was done.
He wiped his mouth as he returned to her side. “Star, there’s something seriously up. Call your Mom.”
“Ugh, I already called her once today! If I call her again she’s going to be all ‘Your wand isn’t working? I never had a problem with my wand! Blah blah blah! Blah blah blah blah! Blah blah blah blah blargh!’”
She pointed her wand at the can again. “Maybe it just needs to finish firing all this green gunk and it’ll work normally again.”
Marco took Star by the shoulder. “Please, no more. My stomach doesn’t have anything left to give.”
Star scoffed and threw her hands to the air. “Then what am I supposed to do, Marco?! If I can’t cast magic with my wand, then what?”
“I don’t know, you were able to unlock your closet without your wand. Maybe you can cast other spells without it?”
Star groaned and she gestured emphatically towards the can. “Ugh, and what? Just point my hand, dip down, and yell ‘Rainbow Blast?!’”
Her cheek marks lit up and a solid ray of rainbow leapt from her outstretched hand to obliterate the corn and punch a hole into the side of the hill behind it.
Marco and Star slowly turned their heads to look downrange at the ex can. Almost all the it was gone except for its bottom and a few sizzling remains of badly burnt creamed corn. The hole in the hill past it also sizzled, the loose dirt scorched into black, chunky glass. Star looked at her hand, the corn, the hole, then finally to Marco.
“Whoaaaa…” She said slowly as she held up her hand to Marco’s face, like a child presenting her finger paints. “I have laser hands.”
Marco took her arm and guided it away lest a spell got fired off. “Yeah, watch where you point them.”
The awe dissipated with a jolt and Star pulled away. “Oh, sorry! I wasn’t going to cast a spell! I’ve just… wow…” She looked at her hand. “Dipping down is an entirely different thing from using my wand!”
Star looked at her hands. “It took all morning for me to figure it out and now I just thought about it and whoosh!”
She grinned. “I don’t even need my wand anymore! I can just cast my spells…”
Marco did not like the manic look in her eyes. “Star, wait!”
“… Like this!” Tossing her wand to Marco, she raised her hands above her head. “NARWHAL BLAST!”
She pointed her hands at the hill and a barrage of narwhals shot from her hands and rammed into the side of the hill. Unlike her usual incarnation of the spell, these were full sized magical narwhals–almost 20 feet long and weighing nearly 2 tons–smashing into the hill with the force to form craters.
Marco stared slack-jawed at the devastation. “Whoa.”
Star jumped up and around, magic flowing from her hands. “Rolling Thunder Lightning Blast!”
She blasted the stump the can of cream corn had been set on, vaporizing it completely.
“Okay, maybe you should start small, you know, and work your way up?!” Marco called out.
“I am starting small!” Star declared before she jumped, spun, and landed–aiming her hands at the hill face again. Her cheek marks and eyes were glowing brightly. “STARDUST DAISY DEVASTATION!”
The beam of yellow light struck the dry grass-covered hill, and the backwash from the beam turned the brown grass green and bloomed a carpet of canary yellow daisies over it.
“Dial it back!” Marco screamed as the blooming daisies swept past his feet.
“But this is so cool!”
With a joyous laugh, Star raised her hands above her head and dipped as far deep into the power as she could. She could feel it in her hands, like big meaty chunks of hobo stew waiting to be stuffed into her mouth! “THERMONUCLEAR BUTTERFLY BLA-ugh?”
Abruptly all the magic left her hands, slipping out of her fingers like thin, runny gravy, and the light left her cheek marks and eyes. “Uh… uwahpapapa…”
Fatigue washed over Star, and she unceremoniously fell forward.
Marco rushed towards her. “Star…!”
Darkness claimed her, she didn’t even feel herself hitting the ground, all she could hear was Marco calling her name, his voice echoing in pitch black lit only by firefly-like lights that drifted upward.
Ria eht hguorht pu gnisir
Pretty fireflies… glowing in the dark.
Satiloc fo llems mraw
She wanted to touch one.
Riah ym ni dniw looc yawhgih tresed krad a no
And that other thing… a shapeless thing in the dark… shuddering and shifting its body to face her. That was weird…
ratS…? ratS…?
It was gone. The fireflies were going away too. She wished she could wave goodbye to them.
“Star? Star!”
She opened her eyes and looked up at Marco’s worried face. Her head was rested across his lap.
“Hey Marcooooo…” She said in a slow, dream-like tone. “… I think I dipped down too far.”
Marco sighed in relief. “You totally overdid it.”
Star closed her eyes. “But that was only… what? Four? Five spells?”
Marco nodded. “Well, we can forget about wandless magic.”
She rolled her head from side to side. “Yep, it is called ‘The Hard Way’ after all.”
“Do you want to go back to using your wand?” He held it up for emphasis.
Star looked at her wand, then at Marco. “I don’t have a choice, Marco. If I dip, I’m bound to trip, and I don’t wanna RIP.”
He rested it on her stomach, and she gratefully took it in her hands. Looking around, she could see that the daisies she conjured up were still there, filling the air with their fragrance. She looked up at Marco, whose eyes were closed as he breathed in the pleasant smell of the flowers.
Star smiled and settled her head onto Marco’s lap.
“Maybe that’s why even when they could dip, every Queen of Mewni used the wand to skim.”
“Yeah. Sorry that this hasn’t worked out.”
“That’s okay, even if everything goes wrong, at least you’re here.”
She closed her eyes too, and smiled. “I could stay like this all day, chilling in a field with my best friend in the whole world.”
Marco smiled down at Star. “Thanks.”
Closing her eyes again, Star breathed in the scent of daisies and other pleasant things.
Does Radiant Shadow transform change how you smell? Or does Marco just smell nice? I need to remember how that spell works. She thought as she relaxed.
“Still,” Marco interrupted those thoughts, “That was amazing. You absolutely destroyed that stump.”
She opened one eye and looked up at him. “Did you know my Mom couldn’t dip down until she was 19? That’s so old, it’s almost 20.”
Marco laughed. “You must be advanced.”
“I know, right? Mom didn’t even sound all that enthusiastic about it when I said it.”
“She was probably jealous,” Marco said with a small laugh.
“So jealous.” Star grinned ear to ear, then let out a sigh as Marco met her gaze.
From their first fight together, Star was his best friend, and the number one person he’d ever let have his back. Moments like these, though, where anything but a fight was going on? He’d take this over him and Star battling a million monsters and winning.
They held each other’s attention, everything lighter and brighter from the sunlight dancing off the daisies all around them.
“Hey,” he said, his smile growing softer.
Warmth filled her as she stared back up at him. “… Hey.”
“You know, you’re the most amazing person I’ve ever met.”
“I’m not too sure, you’ve looked in a mirror before, right?”
Marco blushed as Star hit him back just as hard as he gave it with the good vibes and glanced away. It didn’t last long, and he reconnected their gazes.
She really is so amazing. That thought lingered, and without any other thought he leaned down towards her, only to hesitate when her eyes widened slightly.
The two of them stared at each other, before he continued downward, and Star shifted in position to lift her head up to meet him.
“Nice hair, Marco.”
Marco’s head shot back up, and the moment was gone. Recognizing the voice, he shouted at the source of their interruption.
“Janna!”
Star sat up, smiling bright to cover up her massive blush and near hyperventilating. “Oh, hi Janna~!”
Standing at the top of the hill between them and Hillhurst, Janna gave them a sly smile and slid down into the field of daisies and used her momentum to lope over to the two. “I didn’t think you’d be all the way out here, but I can think of worse places for making magic happen, right?”
The blush swept across Marco’s face like wildfire. “That is… we were-!”
Star joined him, pointing at her wand. “Broken! Need fix!”
Marco nodded fast. “Yes! Star’s wand! Hahahaha! We were fixing her wand!”
Janna looked at it. “There’s something wrong with it?”
Star got up and held up her wand. “Yeah, it’s been shooting this weird green gunk all day.”
She pointed her wand at the face of the hill. “Rainbow Blast!”
Instead of a sick green beam however, a stream of rainbow energy shot out of the wand and hit the hill.
Star and Marco both stared at it. “Huh.”
Janna looked at it as well. “Looks fine to me. Which is good because some guys over at the creepy house over the hill are gonna get eaten by monsters.”
Star welcomed a chance to avoid addressing whatever Janna had almost walked in on. “What monsters?”
Likewise, Marco. “What are you talking about?” He asked, before the sky grew dark in an instant.