There was quite the commotion underway when Star and Marco climbed aboard their bus in the morning for the ride to school. Their classmates were either laughing uproariously, expressing shock or disbelief, or huddled around phone screens in anticipation.
It was such a phenomenon that only a few kids greeted Marco and Star as they found an empty seat on the bus and slid in.
“Huh,” Marco said as he let Star have the window seat. “What’s the latest meme?”
A pretty blonde girl with a aqua-colored streak that matched her eyes leaned out from her seat to look at him. “Hey Marco, you haven’t heard?”
When Marco saw her pretty, freckled face, his heart jumped up in his chest. “Uh… hey Jackie, what didn’t I hear?”
“Hi, Jackie~!” Star sang.
Jackie Lynn Thomas, one of the school’s most popular girls and Marco's crush, waved at Star. “Hey Star.” She then explained what all the commotion was about. “Trip Vanderhoff got his butt kicked trying to flex on Andrew McCormick.”
“Oh, that?” Marco asked. “Yeah, I heard about it.”
Star nodded in agreement. “We saw him in the park like right after it, didn’t we?”
Marco was about to concur, when a realization dawned on him. “Huh… yeah, we did…”
“He was crying like a horse!” Star added.
Was it their advice that set Trip off to pull the stunt at Hillhurst that led to the Magnavores being summoned? This was a question that would be bothering Marco for the rest of the day.
Jackie chuckled at the mental image. “Yeah, video of the fight’s been posted all over the socials, and you can tell he’s freaking out about it because it keeps getting removed everywhere it goes up. I heard there’s also another video of him and his dumbass brother running out of the old Hillhurst house while peeing their pants.”
“I saw that one.” Star said excitedly. “It was so funny!”
Janna and Misao both had shared it with her during their afternoon at Zoom.
“People are already saying that they might not show up to school anymore.” Jackie sounded hopeful about that.
Star looked at Marco. “Wait, they go to our school? How come I never noticed them?”
“They’re in different classes from us, and they don’t really want anything to do with you, or me.” Marco said.
Jackie laughed again, a short chuckle. “Yeah, because unlike the people they pick on, Marco can fight back.”
Marco shot a look towards Star, who was grinning and nodding in encouragement. He blushed, and rubbed the back of his neck. “Honestly, if I were in Dipper’s shoes at that moment? I’d do the same thing.”
“So would I!” Star declared.
Marco and Jackie both gave the wildly impulsive and hyperactive Star the side-eye. “Yeah, you would.”
The two looked back at each other, surprised that came out unanimously. They pointed at one another. “Jinx!” They recoiled. “Oh my gosh, we did it again!”
Jackie burst into laughter, while Marco could not stop the smile that bloomed across his face. Star was smiling too, happy to see Marco actually talking to his long-time crush rather than fumbling with cat stickers on his phone.
“Also, Dipper? You know who decked him?” Jackie then asked.
Star answered. “It’s so weird! We met him and his sister like right after. They’re really cool!”
Not even ten seconds later, the bus parked in front of the school and opened the doors. As students began getting off the bus, Jackie got up. “I gonna to book it to the Cafeteria and grab a breakfast burrito before first bell. See ya Star.” She gave Marco a lingering look. “Bye, Marco.”
Marco, still smiling waved after her and watched her saunter off the bus with backpack over her shoulder and skateboard tucked under her arm. “See you in class, Jackie…”
Star all but draped herself over Marco, grinning. “So, when’s the wedding~?”
Shaking his head, Marco placed his hand on Star’s face and playfully shoved her back. “Come on, Star… we just talked. People talk to each other, it’s normal.”
As they got up and began off the bus, Star was trying not to burst with excitement. “But you don’t normally talk to Jackie!”
“I talk to her!” He held up his phone for emphasis. “We text all the time.”
Star gave him a severely scrutinizing look. “Marco Diaz, you have not texted a single word to Jackie since she gave you her number.” She took his phone and showed the screen. “It’s all cat stickers. Super cute, but a failure of communication.”
She then held the phone up with the camera on. “I mean jeez, the least you can do is send her some selfies Give her something to take home!” Making sure her and Marco’s faces were in the frame, she took a picture. “Camera phone.”
“Wait–!” Marco yelped as the picture. “Star!”
Ignoring his protest, Star looked at the photo as she walked off the bus. She had taken the picture right at the top of the exit stairs. She looked adorable as usual, batting her eyelashes at the camera. Marco, however, was immortalized panicking at having a sudden selfie, and not only was the fifty-year old bus driver in the shot, but she was making a duck face for the camera too.
“Oh, I’m sending this to her because it’s funny.”
Marco’s hand shot for her phone, but Star was quicker, leaning out the way of his lunge. “Don’t send it!”
Star juked another swipe for his phone, sending the message as she did. “Wow, already read.”
“Why are you doing this?!” He demanded.
Star looked up from his phone at him. “Because you have a crush on Jackie, she’s not uninterested, aaaaand I ship it.”
Marco stopped and stared at Star. “Huh.”
She handed him back his phone. “You’re~ welcome~!”
Marco looked at the screen.
Jackie had already responded with a :rofl: emoji.
Marco looked up at Star, looking exceptionally smug.
Further down the street, at the car drop off, Trip Vanderhoff stepped out of his SUV, his feet all but cracking the sidewalk as he stomped out. Right behind him emerged Van, looking no less intimidating–the brothers sweeping through the crowd of students exiting from their buses, socializing in front of the school, or making their way to the complex’s cafeteria.
A pair of Echo Creek Academy Cheerleaders, identified by their orange uniforms with red highlights, fell under Trip’s scrutiny when they noticed the brothers and began snickering.
“What’s so funny, huh?!” He snapped at them. On unspoken command, Van puffed his chest and feinted a lunge towards them, prompting the two cheerleaders to hurry off.
“That’s what I thought!” Trip yelled after them, as the brothers began marching towards the front entrance. “I can’t believe this. They posted it all over Facebook, Insta, and Twitter…”
“At least it’s getting taken down as fast as it goes up,” Van pointed out.
“It doesn’t matter! Everybody’s watching that giant bastard punch me out.” He shook his head. “And he’s probably gone back to wherever the hell that hick came from.”
Stolen from its original source, this story is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
A shrill, harsh voice called out. “Well, well, well, look who’s shown up. It’s MC Peepants and his bro, DJ Depends!”
Both turned around to face a young Chinese woman with long straight black hair, wearing a lavender and purple dress, and having an expression locked in a severe, condescending scowl. Brittney Wong–head of the Echo Creek Academy Awesome Opossums Cheerleader Squad and undisputed ruler of all school functions. The overachiever, the diva, the daughter of old money that was fiercely established in this neck of LA.
Hearing mention of pants-wetting, Trip grew extremely defensive. “Shut the hell up, Wong. You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Do I? You know there were two videos of you clowns looking stupid, right?”
Van was startled. “Two?!”
Brittney pulled out her phone and showed them her screen. Trip’s mouth fell in horror as he saw himself and Van running for their lives from Hillhurst, while Dudley cruised along behind them. “Who filmed that?!”
Van looked at his brother. “Trip, dude, Pine Tree and his sister were at the house.”
Trip frowned. “No way, why would they even be there?!”
“I don’t know, I guess McCormick brought him as backup?!”
Trip palmed his face and dragged it down to his chin. “Just freaking perfect!” Trip growled. “I bet Andrew rubbed enough brain cells together for once to expect I had a plan!”
Brittney folded her arms and shook her head. “Why do you even pick on that kid? He doesn’t even do anything to you.”
“That loser thinks he’s good enough to hook up with Heather,” Van explained.
“Not that it’s your business,” Trip added.
Brittney let out a huff in amusement at that accusation. “Aw, you’re jealous because he can get what you can’t buy. That’s about right.” She grinned viciously at them. “Oh, I forgot to ask, how’d it feel to spend two million dollars to get punched out?”
Trip’s face went red with rage. “I can show you for free if you keep talking shit, Wong! You might be Queen Bee around here, but I’m King of this Castle, and I will slap the taste out of a bitch’s mouth.”
Brittney got up in Trip’s face. “Oh yeah, you’ll fight a bitch because you fight like a bitch.
It took every fiber of his being to not slap her, before he took a step back. “Tch. You’re not even worth it.”
“That’s what I thought, 土豪,” she snapped at him before something behind Trip and Van gave her a fright.
The brothers, wondering what sudenly had her attention, looked back and were surprised themselves to see Shermie Pines’ SUV idle in the drop off lane, with Dipper and Mabel emerging from it.
Dipper stepped out of placed his hands on his hips and smiled as he looked at their new school. “Well, here we are, Echo Creek Academy.”
Misao nodded. “It is very… suburban?”
Like the school buildings she’d see on American TV shows, even. She looked over at the sign of the school, and the statue next to it. “Is that a giant rat?”
“Oh my gosh, it’s Otis the Opossum!” Mabel cried out before she ran over and hugged the statue.
Misao tilted her head to one side. “Why is there a statue of an opossum?”
Dipper looked down at her. “He’s the school mascot.”
There were worse animals to have as mascots, but this one was baffling to the German. “A strange choice.”
She looked to her left and frowned. “Oh no.”
Dipper looked. “What’s–oh.”
He spotted the Vanderhoffs. The curly-haired blonde was shaking where he stood, his face flushed as red as the fire in his eyes. Trip raised a finger and stabbed the air towards the object of his fury and humiliation.
Dipper scowled. “Wow, you actually go here?”
“You! What are you doing here?!” Trip demanded.
Dipper smirked a bit. “… Going to school?”
Mabel looked up from her embrace of Otis the Opossum. “Hugging an opossum statue?”
Trip began walking towards Dipper, shaking his head. Van followed close behind, cracking his knuckles. “Oh no, no, no… you are not going to my school!”
Dipper’s gaze flicked between the brothers. “I don’t care, and I don’t have time for your crap. Leave me, my sister, and my friends alone.”
Trip stepped up to him. “You don’t have friends. You won’t have friends! You won’t have anything when I am through with you, Pine Tree! Not for what you did to me!”
Dipper’s eyes narrowed, and his lips pulled into a scowl. “Is that a threat?”
“It’s a promise!” Trip shouted back and pointed between him, Mabel, and Misao. “All of you are going down!”
Right on the tail end of his shout, Marco and Star walked over. Marco’s hands were buried in his hoodie pocket, and his expression was darkening as he reached Dipper’s side.
“Hey, guys? I bet you two have better places to be than here or on the ground,” he suggested.
Star said nothing but stared right at both boys with a bright smile, and tossed her wand to herself–the hearts on her cheeks replaced with gray skulls.
Any fight Van had left him, and he grabbed Trip by the shoulder. “Uh, dude? No! We’re out of here!”
Trip struggled against Van’s grip. “No! I’m not walking away! I don’t care who you think you are or what you think you can do, but-mmph!”
Van clamped his hand over Trip’s mouth and hauled him back. “Nah, let’s go around back.” The last thing he wanted was any of Star Butterfly’s smoke.
Furious, but helpless to stop his stronger brother from pulling him away, Trip freed his mouth and yelled. “I will wipe you out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, Pine Tree! Mark my flipping words!”
As the Vanderhoffs left, Dipper shook his head. “Somehow, still not worse than Gideon.”
Cuddling Otis, Mabel laughed. “Oh ho ho, yeah.”
Dipper looked at her. “Mabel, stop hugging the opossum.”
“But I love him!”
Star looked at Misao’s hair, and she let out a gasp. “Oh my gosh, your hair!” She shot over to the smaller girl and took some in her hand gently. “I love the color!”
Misao reached up and patted the orange tips of her sidelocks from underneath. “Oh, Mabel dyed it yesterday.”
She reached underneath the back of her head and fanned out her waist-length hair. Mabel had done meticulous work, taking such care with changing her hair color that it had a shine and luster that made the unreal color almost look natural. “She did good work, ja?”
Star wasn’t sure if she could make it look that good with her magic. “Yesssss…”
Mabel reluctantly let go of Otis and stood. “It took all day, but we got it done. I think it’s my best work yet.”
Star turned to Mabel and took her hands in hers. “Teach me your hair magic, oh hair wizard.”
Mabel closed her eyes and chuckled. “All will be revealed, in my Mabel’s Guide to Hair Care series…”
Marco watched the Vanderhoffs disappear around the school. “I just want to say that I’m sorry.”
Dipper turned to him. “For what?”
With a grimace, Marco fessed up. “Star and I ran into him presumably after you punched him out. We might have… given him the idea to call you over to Hillhurst.”
Dipper, Mabel, and Misao all gave a start at that confession. “Wait, really?!” Dipper asked.
“Yeah,” Marco said.
Star bit her lower lip and cringed. “I even suggested he get revenge for whoever wronged him.” She then quickly added. “But I didn’t know who he was, and I usually suggest to everyone that they get revenge!”
Dipper raised a hand in a conciliatory gesture. “Look, it’s okay. I don’t blame you guys for anything.”
Mabel nodded. “Yeah, they would’ve done something anyway to get back at us.”
Misao agreed. “And besides, they tried to lure Drew, Roland, and Jo to the house and we followed to make sure nothing bad happened.”
Now, however, Dipper was a little intrigued by the coincidences that happened that day. “Yeah, you’re good.”
“So… you need help dealing with those two in particular, let me know.” Marco said.
“Let us know,” Star added. “Those two are definitely afraid of Marco and I.”
Dipper waved his hand back and forth. “It’s fine. They do not scare me.”
“We’ve dealt with richer and crazier,” Mabel reassured them both.
“Crazier than the Vanderhoffs?” Marco drew his hands out of his hoodie and shook his head. “Why is it that the richer you are, the more terrible you are to everyone around you?”
Mabel picked up and cuddled Misao. “Hey, it’s not everyone!”
Misao giggled. “Ah, Mabel!”
Star turned to Marco. “Yeah, I’m a princess and I’m not terrible!”
“Yeah, Star’s great! Get in on this hug, girl!”
Star hugged Misao and Mabel, trapping the shorter girl between them. “Friendship group hug~!”
Marco shrugged his shoulders. “Okay, but two out of six isn’t good.”
Dipper groaned. It was bad enough they have to deal with monsters. “There’s more of them?”
“Sure, besides those two clowns there’s Brittney Wong and Jeremy Birnbaum,” Marco’s tone shifting to a gravel-filled snarl made Dipper’s heartbeat pick up. “Both are objectively terrible.”
“Uhh… what’s with Jeremy?” Dipper asked.
“He’s an eight-year-old who keeps beating Marco in Karate,” Star said.
Mabel gave Marco a flat look. “Wow, really?”
“Hey, he’s not terrible because of that!”
Dipper snapped out of his haze and pointed. “Hey, is that Brittney?”
Brittney was still standing where she’d stopped, staring at the lot of them like she was watching reality unravel before her eyes.
Misao looked at Star and Mabel, then at Marco and Dipper. “Ah… is she okay?”
Mabel followed Brittney's line of gaze to Dipper and gestured to him. “She’s probably stunned by how hot this giant nerd is.”
Dipper’s face broke into a pale blush. “Mabel!”
Marco was unused to her expression being something other than contempt for all of creation. “Uh, Brittney? Are you doing okay?”
His voice broke the spell cast on her, and she went from slack-jawed to glaring in the blink of an eye.
“None of your business, Barfo! Hmph!” Whipping her hair hard, she turned her back to the whole group and marched off.
Marco snapped his fingers and pointed at her. “Yeah, see that? She’s been that way since Freshman year. I don’t even know what I did to her.”
Star looked at Marco. “Oh, I bet she’s still mad because you almost puked on her party bus all those times, remember? Huh? Remember the party bus, and how all the rolling and turning, and rocking made you really motion sick?”
He turned green. “Y-yeah.”
“Whoa, you too?” Dipper asked. “If you like I can give you some tips on how to deal with it.”
Marco’s nausea fell away. “What do you do for it?”
Dipper smiled as he shared. “You know, simple stuff, just focus on something that isn’t moving or count backwards from a high number. If you’re just riding in a car, close your eyes and just relax.”
Marco nodded. “I know about that.”
A flinch rocked Dipper. “Oh, uh… have you tried ginger?”
No Marco had not. “What does that do?”
Just as quickly he brightened again. “Well, it’s really simple biology, you see-”
The bell ringing, however, cut him short. Everyone looked towards the doors as they opened, and students began filing in.
“Hold that thought ‘til later,” Marco said, and he turned to Star. “Let’s get to class!”
“Coming~!” Star called, cartwheeling after him.
Dipper watched the two leave. “Yeah, talk later.”
Mabel, her hand to her lips, giggled. “We gotta get our classes and get Misao registered, Dipper. Wipe your mouth and come on!”
As she and Misao went ahead, Dipper flushed and stomped after her. “Mabel, what the heck?!”
Brittney watched the group leave. Her scowl was gone, reduced to a frown and an uncharacteristically furrowed brow. Like everyone else who saw it, an especially timid-looking girl with short hair pulled into a ponytail was concerned. It wasn’t like Brittney Wong to be so… worried about something.
“Uh, Brittney? Are you okay?”
Brittney whirled around on the girl. “Uh, hello, Sabrina? Did you not see?”
She looked back again at the school’s doors. “That was…”