“I’d rather lead you to hell,” Logan muttered and then turned to Zig. “Good job.”
If Lara could see him now, she would be wondering if he’d eaten a batch of magic mushrooms. This was almost too absurd to be real. But if he’d learned anything, Logan knew to roll with the punches. If the System wanted to give him a bulbous squishy evil blob army, he was hamming it up for all it was worth.
Across the gorge, the blobs began marching their first line forward, twenty of them holding swords that shone in the sun so brightly that Logan had to squint and hold a hand over his eyes. The blob in the middle hummed a tune, and the other nineteen added melodious back up support as they marched forward.
“Good,” Logan breathed to Zig. “But we need more. We need them all in here.”
“Should we sacrifice a wagon to lure them in, evilness? The blobs would be eager to die for your flaying cause.”
“No, that won’t be needed.” Plus, he was sure that the System would deduct points. “Once we fill up the gorge with smoke, they won’t be able to see what’s happening. They’ll send in more.”
As the advancing blobs moved closer, the evil blobs in the wagons continued to look pathetic, bouncing in place in seeming panic.
The line moved closer.
Twenty feet.
Ten feet.
Five feet.
With their saucer eyes glinting in sadistic anticipation, Logan’s blobs suddenly transformed into serious, steadfast soldiers. Grabbing their hidden flails, they inserted them through the wagon holes they’d constructed for just this purpose.
The line of golden blobs moved closer. They had just enough time to get a hint that something was wrong before the evil blobs started swinging their flails like a buzzsaw on steroids. The flails had ten-inch-long metal spikes, and the force of the swings bashed into the unprotected golden blobs, sending blood flying in a torrent.
“Soldiers! Use your blessed swords!” shouted the golden blob with the melodious voice. As if he’d been dick-punched, that voice quickly turned into a high-pitched screech.
The golden blobs held up their swords as shields, but it was like inserting a fork into a swinging chain with a spiky metal ball on the end. It had only one result: the swords jammed. Some ricochetted and ended up slicing off appendages.
One after another, the golden blobs fell, victim to the evil blob’s swishing flails. Twenty dead. Just like that.
The evil blobs jumped up and down in excitement, squishy bottoms trailing slime. “Victory! Flaying!”
Logan nodded at Zig.
Zig’s saucer eyes glinted in excitement as he made the signal to light the hay bundles. Logan had given his barbeque lighter to Zig who had assigned it to his best soldier, a blob who was skinnier than the rest, more athletic.
Jumping from wagon to wagon, the soldier lit the bundles of hay on fire and then handed them to other blobs, who flung them into the battlefield.
Soon, a plume of thick, white smoke suffused the area, making it impossible for the golden army to see. Short of a sudden tornado, there was no way to counter it. They would have to go in blind.
“Zig,” Logan said, giving the blob a firm look. “You know what to do?”
Zig wiggled one of his appendages. With his other, he held his flail. “Zig knows what to do, evilness!”
“All right.” With a blink, Logan willed a bucket of sand from his spatial collar and re-assembled his armour, from his legs, chest, to his helmet.
Seamless. Invisible.
Immediately, as soon as his facemask formed, he could see through the smoke. The golden blobs had been in the middle of sending in reinforcements when the smoke had blanketed the area. Now, the soldiers were stumbling into each other in confusion.
Perfect.
He took a second to loop the inert Cursed Rope over his shoulder. It would ruin his invisibility, but he was betting that through the smoke, the golden blobs wouldn’t notice. Plus, he’d made a promise to the rope. Logan never went back on his promises.
Creeping through the gorge, Logan inched his way past the enemy who looked unsure. Unsure wasn’t enough. He wanted them in a panic; he wanted them afraid.
But still, there were enough blobs in the immediate strike area that it was time to deploy his second strategy.
He could sprint up the tunnel instead, but where was the fun in that? Taking a flying leap at the nearest cliff wall, Logan envisioned himself jumping so high that he’d fly for miles, and then launched himself into the air. Jumping with one thrust of his pink sock-clad foot after another, wind flying like he was gliding, he cleared the smoky battlefield, climbed higher, and then kept climbing until he scaled the sheer wall and reached the top.
Damn, that was a hell of a rush.
The blobs stationed at the top of the gorge were peering over the edge of the cliff and vibrating in anticipation. Next to them, Logan had placed the wagon. Stacked so high with boulders and rocks you couldn’t see over the top. It was treacherously close to the edge. So close that one of the wagon wheels was in danger of falling over, the base of one side of the wagon bed and frame close to plummeting over the side.
That was by design.
This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.
“Soldiers,” said Logan, removing his facemask so they could see him. At the same time, he temporarily collapsed half his armour so that his Karma pool could replenish, but he made sure to keep it around his neck to hide his spatial storage collar.
After all, the Silverdagger Clan could see his every move. It would be like big brother watching him with cameras, only this time it was from all angles. Even down at his feet.
The blobs startled and turned to face him. “Evilness!”
“It’s time. Signal the others across the way.”
“Yes, commander!”
A blob slimed over to a long plank. They’d attached one of their belts to the top. This one was bright red and easy to see. Waving it back and forth, the soldier signaled the blobs on the other side of the cliff.
One after another, the blobs picked up hefty rocks the size of their heads. They were so heavy that two blobs together needed to support it with their appendages.
“Now, commander?” asked one of the blobs.
Logan nodded.
With a grunt of effort, they inched towards the cliff and swung the rock over the edge. Logan watched it fall as if in slow motion. The smoke swallowed it right before it made a tremendous boom.
Being so high up would make it impossible to hit the golden blobs head-on, but that wasn’t the goal. The smoke, falling debris that they couldn’t see… all of it was intended for one purpose.
Chaos.
“Good job,” said Logan as he backed up about twenty feet. “Keep this up for ten more minutes. Then I want you to signal the blobs across the way to stop. Once that’s done, you’ll need to back away from the wagon and stand exactly here.” Logan pointed at his feet. “Make sure you motion to the blobs across the way to do the same. Understood?”
The blobs waved their appendages in acknowledgement. “Yes, evilness!”
They returned to the rock pile. Every time they threw another rock over the edge, they vibrated in pleasure, their appendages twitching.
Logan took a deep breath. This was it. One more step, and then he could let go.
Around his shoulder, he felt the rope stir in interest.
Not yet, sent Logan.
Jogging down the tunnel, Logan reached the bottom of the gorge and then looked around.
Perfect.
He’d entered behind the golden army. But there were too many blobs in reserve back here. He needed the whole army to enter the clearing, or this wouldn’t work.
Quickly re-assembling his armour and becoming invisible once again, Logan darted through the army, dodging golden blob after blob. They were raising their swords and looking around in panic. The blobs up above had stopped throwing rocks, but they didn’t know that. They couldn’t see anything past the smoke.
Logan crept closer to one and hissed, “Coward,” as he rushed past.
The blob started. “Who’s there?” he shouted.
The other blobs hushed him. “Shut up, idiot! They’ll hear you and hit you with a rock!”
Logan darted through the crowd and targeted the blob who’d spoken up, bashing him on the back as he whispered, “They already heard you. Coward.”
The blob shrieked in fear. “Who was that?!”
“Zanricky, is that you?” said a soldier next to him, straining to see through the smoke. “Stop making such a racket.”
“The evil blobs are here!” Zanricky said, his sword trembling. “They’re in our midst! They have an invisible, evil power!”
The other blob sighed. “There’s no evil power. Your mind is playing tricks on you, just—”
Logan darted behind him and brushed his hand against the back of his head. “We’re here,” he whispered. “Run.”
The blob stilled. But he didn’t scream, he only straightened, his saucer eyes narrowing. This one was made of sterner stuff. “Zanricky!” he said. “Find the captain.”
“Y-yes, sir.”
Rather than continuing, Logan stood in place and grinned underneath his facemask. The golden soldiers were murmuring, and soon, a rumour of invisible evil blobs in their midst spread. As they tried in vain to see through the smoke, they knocked appendages and clanged weapons.
“Watch it, you moron! You almost stabbed me!”
The other blob whimpered in fear.
“Men!” snapped the stern blob. “Keep it together!”
There was a racket, a yell from beyond the line, and soon, a skinny blob with three swords tucked into his belt slimed over. “What’s going on? What’s wrong with Zanricky? Glopky! What have you done?”
The sterner blob, Glopky, straightened in affront. “I’ve done nothing, captain! It’s the evil blobs. They have an invisible power. They’re… well.” Glopky blinked his saucer eyes uncertainly. “They’re whispering evil curses into our ears, sir.”
“Nonsense!” snapped the captain. “It’s just battle jitters, men! Remember, our cause is just! No evil entity can invade a blessed army. Our auras will blast them away.”
“B-but,” stuttered Zanricky.
The blob swore underneath his breath. “For all that’s blessed, this army is comprised of frightened children. If it helps ease your mind, we’ll get your brothers-in-arms to join you. With a full contingent of soldiers, no evil blob will stand a chance.”
“Sir,” said Glopky, “what about the rocks?”
The captain hit Glopky over the head with the flat of his sword. “The rocks have stopped! Are you deaf, man? They must have run out.” Then raising his voice, he said to the rest of the group. “Pull yourselves together, men! Calm down and take a breath. Sing a song, hum a blessing. You know our cause is right and just.”
“Yes, captain!” murmured the blobs uncertainly.
Logan couldn’t hold back a wide grin as he backed up until he reached the nearest tunnel. He’d dragged tumbleweeds in front of the entrances, but he needn’t have bothered—the smoke was so thick the blobs could hardly see a foot in front of them, let alone the entrance to a tunnel.
Letting his armour dissolve to replenish his Karma pool, Logan took a deep breath and tried to calm himself down. The next part of his plan was pure conjecture. He hoped it would work, but he’d never tried this from so far away. It was also a huge risk.
He was betting that the Silverdagger Clan were glued to what he was doing and were virtually standing over his shoulder. When Logan had tried to look underwater in Errol’s trial, the System wouldn’t let him, and he’d had to deploy [Deepwater Explorer]. If Asthea or the guards tried to look beyond Logan and up at the cliff, they should experience that same elastic pulling sensation.
Yet there was no reason to risk it.
Logan needed to look busy; he needed no suspicion whatsoever that he was the cause of what would happen next. That meant he’d have to look focused and busy while mentally taking a step back.
“Rope,” he said out loud this time, unwinding the Cursed Rope from his shoulder. At the same time, Logan mentally stretched his senses, deploying [Life Cycle Master] to go past the bright spots of life that represented the blobs, up the cliff, past insects, past a reptile that was clinging to a ledge, then up to the bright blob spots of life at the top of the gorge on either side.
His entire mental focus narrowed in on the top of the cliff, he mechanically flicked his wrist, unwinding the Cursed Rope until it swelled in size and electricity crackled through the tunnel. “Are you ready to go to work?”
With one blink, Logan concentrated on the wagons. They were inert—there was nothing to sense, but he’d commanded the blobs to back up to a specific area after they’d finished throwing their rocks so he could mentally calculate the distance between the wagons and where they were standing. Logan had thought about having the blobs push the wagons over the cliff, but they were so full of stone and rock that there was no way they could make those wagons move.
Furrowing his brow, Logan pictured the wagons like a snapshot in his mind—from the weathered wood to the stretched, warped wheels crushed by the weight of the rocks. Then with one more blink, he willed them both inside his spatial storage, telling the collar, no rock, no dirt, wood only.
That’s where his strategy came into play. Commanding the wagons to go into his spatial collar from such a long distance was difficult enough, commanding it to take the wagons and only the wagons was like walking a tightrope where one step to the side could mean failure.
Logan felt his senses stretching, like pulling on a rubber band where the ends were at risk of fraying and snapping back onto him twofold. Then with a snap, he felt the pressure ease.