Belle had thought it was lucky, at first. Z had gone out with the City Guard, after Daivad, which left her and Jac free, once they’d slipped back inside the walls, to get to Z’s house and get cleaned up before Z had a chance to catch Daivad’s scent on her. But Z’s absence also left Belle with limited options for finding Kitten or Pait. Z would have any and every resource they’d need to find Pait as soon as possible, including their own Inhuman nose. And, despite Daivad’s warning about Z, Belle was sure they would help. For her, they would.

But as it was, they were on their own.

The moment they had washed up and changed, Belle said, with still-dripping curls tucked in a wrap on top of her head, “Maybe I can track their magics, same as I did Kure’s.”

She hurried out to the courtyard that was shrouded in early morning light, leaving Jac calling after her, “You sensed Kure’s magic because he’d fathered a riot, Belle. Your pet and that kid will be doing their best to hide, not make a scene.”

“Pait, maybe,” Belle agreed, already flopping onto the grass like she had the night before and closing her eyes. “But remember the wreck Kitten caused in that coop. He’s not one to hide.”

“Belle…” She heard Jac’s voice over her, full to the brim with frustration. Anger, even.

She’d noticed it in Jac’s magic, building steadily over the last few days. Maybe ever since they’d left Urden—but Belle couldn’t be sure, because she didn’t remember anything before Ace. And Belle was ashamed to realize she’d been so caught up in her own sweet shit—in Z and Kitten and Kure and Daivad—to ask Jac about it. To even really talk to her at all.

Belle opened her eyes to see Jac’s face, standing above her, jaw set. She sat up, and tried to keep the emotion that threatened to wobble her words out of her voice. Jac saw Belle as a fragile creature, prone to dissolving into tears at the wrong word—because she was—and Belle didn’t want Jac closing off just to protect Belle’s feelings. Again. She said, “I see your anger—”

This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

“There’s no anger to see.”

“Sweet shit,” Belle pressed. “And I want to open my ears to every word you have for me, but we—I—have to find Kitten before—”

“How many times will you risk your ass and mine for a fucking monster, Belle!?” Jac burst out.

Belle flinched, panic sparking up her arms and into her chest, setting her heart pounding. For a moment Belle forgot herself, and Panic took up the reins—only to have the reins snatched away by Lady Belle, who rattled off their familiar list of ways to calm Richard—

But already the regret was all over Jac’s beautiful face, and Belle, the true Belle, gently took the reins back in hand, reminding them all: This is Jac. Not Richard. We are safe.

Even still, the chain reaction of one visceral emotion after the next at Jac’s raised voice welled up in Belle’s eyes. She blinked to clear her vision and saw Jac’s cheeks and magic flushed with guilt, her jaw working as she chewed on words she couldn’t say.

“I have to find him, Jac,” Belle said, as even as she could manage.

“These beasts are going to be your death, Belle!” she said it quieter, but with no less intensity. “You wrap them up in your heart, and they always claw it to pieces. One day soon there won’t be a healer in all Lushale who can mend that damage, and you’ll be dead.”

“Then I’ll be dead,” Belle whispered, hot tears spilling down her cheeks. “I tried keeping a pristine heart, after Mama T … left. And again, when Richard took me. I burned out all the old scar tissue—but that burned out the memories, too. And I was worse than dead. I like my heart broken, Jac. What good’s a heart otherwise?”

Jac’s magic burned, sunlight roiling in on itself, scorching the air around her. She threw her hands up, exasperated, and said, “You might like your heart broken, but I don’t!”

The morning was silent for a few moments, Belle’s tears slipping silently down her face. Voice wobbling, but tone a little lighter, Belle said, “Guess you shouldn’t have wrapped a monster-loving circus freak in your heart, then.”

With every broken heartbeat, a tiny bit of tension burned off like morning mist under a rising sun. Jac snapped, “Too late.”

Belle smiled. “I love you, too.”

With a huff and a string of mumbled swears, Jac stomped back inside the house before shouting, “Tell me when you’ve found the little shit.”