"I was far too disrespectful to the disciples and alchemists of the Outer Court, so I decided to punish myself. I locked myself in an empty room, broke my ribs, then both my arms, blocked the flow of Qi in my body, and lay there to die, hoping to atone for my sins."
Well, that was one hell of an excuse. Straight out of the best police reports. The suspect allegedly rammed his stomach against the officers' boots, inflicting severe moral injuries on them.
Wang Zhu Tan froze like a pillar of salt, trying to process what he had just heard.
"Is... is that true?" - he asked in a hoarse voice.
Sli Ker's gaze darted behind him and rested on my mad smile as I mix herbs in a mortar, preparing the next batch of my miracle elixir.
"Yes, that's exactly what happened” - the victim squeezed out, unwilling to reveal the truth. After all, I could stop Sli Ker's heart with just a look, and he felt it clearly.
Wang Zhu Tan, stunned into silence, stepped aside and asked me - "What do you need for his recovery?"
"A Medium Healing Pill. I can make it myself, but I don’t have the necessary herbs."
"I’ll issue you a pass with a request to supply the required herbs."
The steward pulled out a small jade medallion, focused for a moment to record the information onto it, and handed it to me. After casting one last look at his disciple, he left.
Honestly, the local people have dinosaurs in their heads instead of cockroaches – and just as vicious. Look at what happens to someone over one innocent phrase. So the disciple decided to punish himself. Good for him. And now we’ve got a full-blown soap opera.
Five minutes later, after ordering no one to let the sick man leave the room or allow anyone in besides me and Wang Zhu Tan, I departed for the 'office' of the alchemist guild.
When I reached the guild building, I witnessed complete chaos. Everyone was running somewhere, shouting something, constantly bumping into each other, and continuing their Brownian motion.
"What is this, a fire in a brothel during a flood?" - I asked, stopping one of the apprentices.
The guy froze for a few seconds, trying to grasp the question, and then shouted:
"Exactly!!!" - and continued his sprint.
Scratching my head, I made my way to the herb warehouse, where alchemists could collect supplies for making pills.
"There are no herbs left!" – Warehouse keeper shouted as soon as he saw me.
"What do you mean by no herbs? At least half of those crates still have something in them” - I refuted his excuse, scanning the warehouse with my psionic abilities.
"Those are for emergencies only!"
"And my situation is exactly that – an emergency” - I explained.
"No! We can’t allocate more resources for this expedition."
"What expedition?" - I asked, surprised. - "I’m here for something else entirely."
"Oh? And what might that be?"
"One of Wang Zhu Tan's disciples sustained severe injuries, and I need herbs to make a healing pill."
"Fine. Go to that cabinet and take what you need. Hey! Where are you dragging that? Who gave you permission?"
At this point, the guild warehouse keeper got distracted by a couple of apprentices trying to swipe some firewood, which allowed me to approach the cabinet and grab the rare herbs I needed. I took only a few of each plant but far more types than were strictly required to make the Medium Healing Pill. According to sayings, better to have surplus than to run out.
"Greedy little thieves, all of you! You look away for one second, and they snatch everything that’s not nailed down. Are you done?" - the warehouse keeper grumbled at me.
The author's content has been appropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.
"I can’t find Needlepoint Seven-Color” - I said, giving the name of the only plant on my mandatory theft list that I hadn’t yet grabbed.
"It’s not here. Wait a second, I’ll bring it."
I moved to the warehouse entrance, and soon enough, he returned with a couple of stems of the necessary herb.
"Thank you. Any idea what’s causing all this commotion?" - I asked.
"You haven’t heard?" - The warehouse keeper, having found a grateful listener, completely forgot about everything else. - "In three days, special Spiritual Geysers in the Valley of Geysers will awaken, releasing Ancient Qi. This event only happens once every ten years. Recently, our scouts detected signs of the impending eruption. The entire guild is now preparing for the journey. Bathing in those Spiritual Geysers greatly aids cultivation, and many participants hope to achieve a breakthrough."
"And how can I join this expedition?" - I asked, already wondering if I could drain all the Qi from those geysers for myself.
"You can’t” - the warehouse keeper shut me down.
"Why not?!" - I asked, offended.
"You’re an Outer Court disciple, aren’t you? For someone like you to participate, two active sect members must submit an application in your name. One could be your teacher, but where will you find a second? Don’t even ask me for help – I already promised my vote to my own disciple."
"Well, isn’t that just typical” - I muttered, disappointed.
Leaving the guild, I headed back to camp. There, I sat next to Sli Ker and began sorting through the herbs, contemplating what to feed him. He glanced at me nervously out of the corner of his eye, sweating buckets at the sight of my wild smile. That’s fine. In his condition, sweating is actually useful. It would help expel the toxins I’d fed him earlier.
Deciding that a simple healing pill was too boring, I began mentally sifting through the properties of the herbs I had collected, trying to create a combination that could restore his Qi circulation system and repair his physical injuries. Initially, I wasn’t having much success, but after half an hour of meditation, I come up with right formula. Another half an hour was spent developing the procedure for making the pill. Finally, I was ready to begin this extremely dangerous but very interesting experiment. Of course, the danger wasn’t to me but to my patient, which made the project all the more promising.
"Do you know anything about alchemy?" - I asked Sli Ker, smiling kindly. He was still paralyzed but had begun to regain feeling in his toes. If not for that 'fixation,' he would’ve jumped out the window long ago.
He shook his head vigorously, afraid to even speak.
"I’m going to create a new experimental pill and test its effects on you” - I said, watching his eyes nearly pop out of his head. - "It includes the eight most poisonous herbs that grow in the Misty Mountains." - At this point, he began sweating profusely, as if someone had dumped a bucket of water over his head. - "Slow Death, Black Blood, Crumbling Lichen, Slippery Azure Moss, Drowned Lily, Deadman’s Shackles, Cadaverous Thread Fungus, and Pus Thorn. These eight plants are sources of poisonous Qi. Do you know the folks saying: 'Every medicine is a poison'? Well, I believe that every poison is also a medicine. You just need to know how to use it. I’ll mix these eight poisons so that they neutralize each other, leaving only the plants’ healing properties. This will help you recover. But even if it doesn’t, science will remember you. Who knows? Maybe your pointless death might save someone else’s life in future."
With that inspiring speech, I began preparing the pill. The task was truly challenging, so I had to focus and control every step with my psionic abilities to ensure no mistakes. The most difficult part was the final merging of the poisons, during which the plants’ Qi had to react in a specific way, neutralizing the chemical toxins they contained.
At last, the pill was complete – a ‘critical success,’ as they say. I proudly held the pill, which was enveloped in a glowing purple haze. Its surface was covered with tiny skull patterns, and when I placed it on a clay plate, the plate began to crack and blacken.
Sli Ker saw this special effect and completely lost hope of survival. He struggled, attempting not to open his mouth, but I was stronger. Forcing his jaws apart, I shoved the pill in and pushed it down his throat with a stick. A loud gulp echoed, and the pill began to take effect.
My calculations turned out to be correct. A powerful healing Qi was released from the pill, immediately stimulating Sli Ker’s meridians and accelerating the flow of life energy. His wounds began to heal, and even his cultivation foundation improved, becoming more solid. I had every reason to feel proud of myself.
For the first few minutes, Sli Ker writhed in agony, preparing to die. But then, to his surprise, the pain subsided, and he felt a sense of relief as control of his body returned.
“Well, you see? You were worried for nothing. Now you just need to rest for a couple of weeks, and everything will be fine. Probably... At least on the surface, that’s how it looks.”
Under my merciless gaze, the 'patient' once again realized that although his life continued, it could end at any moment if I so wished. Not even a grand cultivator of the Core Formation level would be able to save him.
“Hey, you there, call Master Wang Zhu Tan” - I shouted to the guards outside the door.
Five minutes later, the Outer Court steward entered the room and froze, staring at his disciple sitting upright on the bed.
“Check my work.” - I smugly pointed at Sli Ker. - “Alive, healthy, and seemingly sane. Although I can’t guarantee the last part.”
Wang Zhu Tan approached the disciple, placed his hand on his shoulder, and scanned his body. The crease on his forehead smoothed out, and he sighed in relief.
“Tan Ji Tao, I appreciate your help. Few alchemists could completely heal my disciple in such a short time. Moreover, his cultivation foundation remains intact despite the severity of his injuries.”
“Thank you for your evaluation. In return, could you submit an application for me to participate in the expedition to the Spiritual Geysers?” - I immediately stated my price.