"What was it he did again?" James asked Tom after his pronouncement.

"I don't know. Terrorized towns? Probably stole from them and hurt people? It just sounded cool to say." Tom grumbled at being questioned in a moment he thought looked really cool.

"You know this really just follows the pattern of dungeons from before right?" Derek mentioned as they rode toward the fork in the road.

"How so?" Tom asked.

"Well, there were always mini-bosses before the main boss. So it's like you were supposed to pick this first, then go to the other, probably harder, task." Derek explained. "So it's just coincidence we are in another war on two fronts. Also, the townspeople here aren't defending themselves, they're hiding and fearing for their lives. So it's not exactly the same."

Tom glared at Derek this time.

"Sorry, just trying to help. I know you don't need more stress." Derek pleaded now with his own hands up in surrender.

They found the fork in the road, and Tom turned to go south rather than continue east. He let his shoulders slump again and let out a long sigh.

"I know you're right. I'm sorry for snapping. It's just been so stressful lately that I was hoping for something more relaxing in a dungeon." Tom apologized.

"Look, you don't have to explain it to us. We are right there with you. But it's nice to hear you say that and realize it. Besides, I think there will be enough violence coming for you to let off some steam." Derek winked at him and nudged Tom with his elbow.

"You're probably right. It'll be nice to fully let loose and lop off a few heads." Tom said, beginning to feel better about the situation.

"I know it helped me," Kevin beamed at him while holding one arm around Kirsten's waist.

"You almost fucked that up back there, you know," Derek said to Kevin.

"Nah, I could see it in Tom's eyes. He was ready too." Kevin said still smiling from ear to ear.

"This is bullshit," James pouted nearby.

"Oh, come on. You can't expect us to treat everyone the same. You are too much of a child for that." Tom said, beginning to feel better about the adventure.

Continuing above the sandy path in the ride they were loaned from the city, Tom looked around and realized that the setting was more perfect than he had thought. At first glance, he had been confused by a Western setting under the sea. But if you didn't think about the water everywhere, it did look a bit like a desert here with sand as far as the eye could see.

There weren't dunes like in the desert with winds moving the sand, but rather sandbars scattered around rose above the normally flat grounds. Even some of the vegetation and rocks looked like cacti sticking up here and there as they traveled. Fish gathered around these and other rock outcroppings in schools as well as alone in beautiful displays of color dotting the landscape. Occasionally dark shapes would appear in the distance that Tom thought might be sharks, and above which seemed to mostly be whales needing air at the surface.

Schools of fish swam around and alongside them as they traveled, and a remora even latched onto the side of the clamshell half to ride without swimming. The abundance of color made the world come to life in a way that didn't happen above water. And the feeling of weightlessness one felt if they turned off the density-shifter was euphoric.

When the team was getting further away from the town, a set of underwater mountains began to grow in the distance. As they drew closer, everything in the world seemed to pause as the world stopped around them. A message in the same orange glowing text from before appeared in front of them saying "Roll me" with a twenty-sided die floating down to Tom.

"What are we rolling for now?" Tom asked as he took the die and held it in his hand.

The text changed to say "Perception check" instead. Seeing no way around this, Tom rolled the die out on the sandy floor. Bouncing around and then rolling until it came to a stop, the number shown was seventeen. The die slowly faded out of existence and the world resumed as it had been.

Ahead, a small cave began to glow with a soft orange light, drawing their eyes to it.

"I guess we should go there?" Tom asked the rest of the group.

Most of them shrugged, but Derek looked ahead determinedly.

"Not a lot else out here. We should check it out. But keep us at a distance and approach from off of the path." Derek replied.

Turning the reins so the dolphins changed direction, Tom took them past the mouth of the cave and over to a large kelp forest. They stopped once inside and left the dolphins and half clamshell hidden in the greenery.

"Won't those dolphins die? They need oxygen right?" Kiera asked, concerned for their safety.

The author's tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

"Montgomery said they were magical dolphins that could breathe underwater. So I'd say they're fine." Derek replied to her.

"You all be good now, don't go running off. I'll bring you back some fish if you're good." Kiera said after walking over to the dolphins and petting them affectionately.

The team crept closer to the entrance of the cave and peered through the kelp that grew straight up for almost a hundred feet. Sitting in chairs on either side of the cave mouth, leaning back and relaxing against the stone facade were two fishmen. Each of them wore a traditional western outfit complete with a cowboy hat, and had what appeared to be a revolver in a holster on their hips.

"Well, looks like they all have guns," Tom said softly.

"No shit, this is a western. We knew that going into this." James whispered back.

"I just meant that this means we can't go running in with swords and axes. We won't get close enough. Everyone bought guns like we said right?" Tom asked everyone in the group.

The response felt like a meetup at a gun show with everyone pulling out handguns and a few assault rifles.

"Okay then. Looks like you all did. If you can get in close, physical weapons can damage more people at once. But do whatever you need to do to survive." Tom said to the team as they huddled around him.

"I'll start us off," Kiera said moving to the edge of the kelp forest and peering out with her assault rifle.

She had invested in a scope as well, so she had a better chance of catching them off guard. Peering through the scope, she sighted in on the man on the right who was further away first. Lining up the crosshairs, she aimed for the fishman's head. Squeezing the trigger slowly to keep her aim, the weapon suddenly fired out a shot and the bullet flew straight and true, penetrating the forehead and exploding out of the back, painting the side of the mountain in fish brains.

Quickly setting the sight on the other fishman, she aimed a second time. The other guard barely had time to stand up and turn toward his fallen friend before another bullet was fired, hitting him in the back of the head and splattering his brains out through his face and onto the ground. The creature died before it even had a chance to sink to its knees.

"MOVE IN!" Derek ordered everyone.

Together as one, they rushed from the cover of the kelp forest and toward the cave entrance. Barely making it to the first set of crates outside the cave entrance, the team hunkered down behind various pieces of cover as fishmen of all shapes and sizes began to pour out of the cave searching for the sounds of gunfire, all of them with their revolvers drawn.

Gunfire began to be exchanged as the first few combatants to leave the cave were shot down by the team while they tried to find them. Their dying bodies showed the others where the shots were coming from, and soon the team of friends found themselves in a real shootout.

James shot creature after creature in the crotch yelling "DICK SHOT" After every successful hit, while many of the others simply tried their best to hit their targets. As more and more fishmen exited the cave and ducked behind wooden barrels, which Tom still didn't understand how they got them to sink, and crates for cover, James switched over to his Uzis. He then commenced the tactic he had lovingly named "Spray and Pray" and began unloading with his fully automatic weapons.

Laughing maniacally at the devastation he was causing, the fishmen could now do nothing but hide behind their makeshift cover as the bullets flew faster than ever. Every time one of them tried to peer over the top of their cover to see what was happening, James would shoot them in the face with his Hunter's Mark skill he could use to switch targets and increase his accuracy.

"Keep moving while James lays down fire! Kiera, be ready to let loose with something automatic when James runs out of bullets! Cover us to get closer!" Derek said to the team through the mental link, careful not to yell the plan too loudly or their connections would reach those of the fishmen.

Tom, Derek, Kevin, Kirsten, and reluctantly Brian, rushed toward the cave entrance, shooting or stabbing any fishmen they came across. Tom slid into a crate taking cover when James' bullets ran out and he ducked behind cover. Kiera remained standing, switched to her double assault rifle combo, and waited. When the fishmen began to pop up to take advantage of the lack of return gunfire, she let loose with her barrage, continuing to mow down the enemy.

"THIS IS MY KINDA PARTY!!! COME AND DIE BY MY HANDS!!!" Kiera yelled in the overwhelming rush of adrenaline.

Beginning to panic, the fishmen stayed hidden while the barrage of bullets continued to rain down on them. Tom and the others continued moving through the cover, reaching around to kill any they found on their way. By the time Kiera had run out of ammo in her magazines, the fishmen all lay dead.

"Merry Christmas ya filthy animals," James said standing up from behind a crate. A fishman groaned near him and he fired off another burst of rounds from one of his Uzi's into its head. "And a happy new year."

Derek moved to peer into the cave and when he did a bullet fired toward him and clipped the wall of the cave just above his head.

"We aren't done yet. More inside." He said when he jerked his head back out and leaned against the side of the mountain.

"Oh, I know what happens next!" James said excitedly as he ran over to the other side of the cave mouth, dodging a bullet that fired at him.

"Pecos Mark! We know you're in there! This only ends one of two ways, see. Either you come out to us, or we come in to you." James shouted.

"Well, now that just sounded wrong," Jay said.

"Huh?" James asked thinking about what he said again. "Oh! I got it now. HA!"

"You'll never take me alive!" Came a response from inside the cave.

"That was never really an option, Mark!" James called back in his best Southern accent. "We done come here to kill you."

"Way I sees it, I got the upper hand right now! Go ahead, come on inside." The voice of presumably Pecos Mark said back.

"Anyone have any ideas?" Tom asked.

"One, but you may not like it," Kiera said.

"Well, spill it," Tom hurried her along.

"I've got a grenade launcher. But it only has a few rounds because this motherfucker was expensive." Kiera replied, producing a heavy eight-round grenade launcher from her inventory.

"You bought one of those?! That's so cool!" James said. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because you shouldn't have one. Like, it should be removed as a possibility for you." Kiera replied, holding the launcher further away from him.

"Aww, man! That's not fair." James said.

"Oh, no. It's totally fair. We all agree." Tom said, and everyone around nodded their agreement.

"Alright, we go with Kiera's plan. We likely won't be able to go in after as the cave may collapse, but let's hope we get him on the first barrage." Derek said

"On my mark. One...Two..."