BOOK 2: COMMUNITY / CH. 14: THE LEGACY

TUESDAY 9:00 AM

“So what have you got planned for us, Kate?” John asked.

“Well, there's one or two documents to be written, I think.”

Groans filled the room. “But I think, John, I'd like you and Sarah to work on what went on yesterday. Not for publication, but as an internal record, OK? Major emphasis on the risk levels. We'll get Ivan to come up with a short description of what he found happened to John's brain. But also note down how you got that image. You never know, someone might need it in a century.”

Sarah had an idea. “Before we start, another thing I think we should do is try to pass on Mama Ng's legacy. We don't know how to add to it, but I think if we put our heads together, John and I can pass it on.”

“That's a good idea,” Kate agreed. “Who gets it first, or do we all receive at once?”

“For safety's sake let's only do one person receiving it at a time,” John suggested. “That way at least some of us aren't out of action in case of some kind of emergency.”

“Oh Lord, let there not be any of those today!” prayed Karen.

“Amen!”

Kate asked, “George, are you happy to be involved?” He nodded. “Great, then I'd like you and Karen to work on an experimental set-up to test thoughts going along bits of metal. What allows them, what blocks them and so on. Since we don't know much yet, the first thing to do would be to see what you can both touch without any thoughts passing. It'd be embarrassing to build something then find the support conducts thoughts.”

“Yes, wouldn't it,” Karen laughed.

“If they find any new candidates, it would be interesting to try just a paper-thin sheet of whatever it is, as though it was a glove,” Sarah suggested.

“OK, I'm sure Horrace and Ivan have a nice pile of materials at hand. Grab a corner of the lab and see what you can find out. Write notes of course.”

“Of course,” agreed Karen.

“So that leaves me getting my brains fried, doesn't it?” Kate said. “I'd feel happier if we prayed first, you know.”

----------------------------------------

In the end, they decided not just to pray, but to get Janet to hook them into the brain scanners. John had the prototype helmet on once more, which had been altered slightly so that he could lie back, in what looked suspiciously like a second hand dentist's chair. Kate was in the smaller scanner. Sarah would be watching over both.

John and Sarah put their minds together and thought back to when they'd received that parcel of memories from Mama Ng. They were surprised to see it sitting in each other's minds, clear and sharp like an enormous multifaceted gem. Somehow it was still there, unaltered, even though their memories of the events surrounding it were growing hazy already. Not wanting to risk opening it, they didn't gaze at it for long. “Kate, are you ready?” John asked. “It's sitting here in our memories, a great big crystal of a thing.”

“It looks as unchanging as granite so I don't think we need to worry about it degrading,” Sarah added. “Do you want to do this now, or wait until we've found out how to add to it?”

“Give it to me, we've gone to all this trouble to get hooked up to these things. That way there's a spare copy of the original if you two don't get the adding right. Ready, Janet?”

“Yes, I'm ready. No, I'm not. I'm going to get Ivan to watch over the other console. Hang on a minute.”

“I'm not going anywhere,” John said from inside the franken-helmet.

“I wonder what we're about to learn from these machines,” Kate asked.

“Probably how many kilowatts we use sending and receiving this massive thing.”

“And which parts of the brain it affects.”

“Ah, so we find out where the pathways for sending and receiving are, maybe. That'd be interesting.”

“Ah, new specimens for my toys!” Ivan announced with mad-scientist glee.

“Ivan, sometimes I wonder if you're pretending to be a mad scientist a bit too much,” Kate said.

“Who said anything about pretending?” Sarah asked with a grin.

“Hey, I'm sane!” protested Ivan, then added in a stage whisper, “I have to be sane, or they'll take away my toys.”

“What about proving its not an addiction, Ivan,” Janet said. “No mad scientist for a week. Or any other persona either for that matter.”

“Not even stage magician? With my beautiful assistant?” he said, beaming at Janet.

“You're assisting me, Ivan.”

“Oh yeah. OK. I'll try for a week. But I might get withdrawal symptoms.”

“If you do then we can always schedule some time to talk about it,” Kate threatened, teasingly.

“And if you succeed then I just might let you meet my protective brother, and the rest of the family too,” Janet said.

“Seriously?” Ivan was surprised. She'd told him about her brother's habit of grilling her friends, and how she suspected his intimidating attitude had made some friends decide they weren't interested in pursuing a relationship. “Well, it depends how well you do, but I think if you've got the will-power to not hide behind your mad scientist mask and just be Ivan, then you're going to find my brother a pushover.”

“Oh. You mean you think I'm going to fail?” he asked, his excitement sliding towards depression.

“No,” Janet said, “I think you're going to realise you can function without any masks, Ivan.”

Kate added, “Ivan, we've talked about this, remember? Janet's on the right track, but can we talk about this another time? I expect John wants to get out of his iron mask.”

“Kate, there's no iron in that mask, it would affect the field,” Ivan corrected.

“I know, I know, but can we start? What with Sarah suggesting we should call it off, John worried about us boiling our brains and you two getting distracted about the idea of impending romantic bliss, I'm getting nervous. Let's just do it, can we?”

“How about you pray or do that meditation thing first?” Ivan suggested.

“Thank you, Ivan,” Sarah said, “good thought.”

“Both, I suggest,” John offered.

“OK, we'll pray, then calm down a bit, then Sarah can give the countdown and John can start the transfer on zero.”

“You're the boss,” John said.

“So you pray for us all, John.”

“Father God, we don't know how risky this is, but we don't want these valuable memories to be lost. We think it is good to share them. Protect us from our folly if that's what this is, and lead us to all wisdom. We commit ourselves to Your hands and ask that You guide Ivan and Janet in all they do. Yours is the glory, the power and honour, Lord. Amen.”

“Amen. Let's spend some time in peace now, people,” Kate ordered.

Their brain patterns changed, and Ivan and Janet speculated on what was going on in their minds. Then, strangely, they saw a matching pattern imposed on both sets of monitors. Kate and John's patterns weren't identical but there was some greater pattern they seemed to be fitting in with. It certainly wasn't normal, it didn't even fit what they'd seen when Sarah and John had been ‘thinking together’ on something, or any other thought pattern they'd seen during their tests. There was something decidedly unusual about it. It wasn't radio interference, the equipment was shielded against that, and it wouldn't look like that anyway, but Ivan still checked. Nothing. Ivan was about to check to see if there was some wiring fault that might explain it, when the strange signal ended. It didn't just turn off, like an intermittent fault would, it was more of a diminishing, a fading away until it was too small to notice. But Ivan pointed out now he knew what was looking for, it was still present though much reduced. Then it stopped. Quite simply it hadn't seemed like anything that Ivan could explain. Not wanting to give any suggestions to their semi-conscious colleagues, Janet wrote a note to him, “What's the betting they wake up and say they've just been talking to their God?”

“Scary thought,” he wrote back. “And if they do? Do we tell them we saw it happen?”

“What, give them ammunition to challenge our comfortable world-view?” Janet asked, thinking that her world-view wasn't actually as comfortable as it had been. There seemed to be a lot of things happening that didn't really fit into it.

“If only I could discover a wiring fault,” Ivan wrote back.

They saw their colleagues' brains returning to alertness, then Sarah opened her eyes and asked, “How long were we out of things?”

“About quarter of an hour. Why?”

“It seemed like longer, or shorter. We couldn't decide. Sometimes happens that way when God comes to chat.” Her face seemed to be glowing, Janet noticed.

“He's, urm, given us a couple of messages to pass on, Ivan, Janet. I don't know if they make sense to you,” John said. “One is that a good scientist knows that discarding a false hypothesis is easier than inventing a wiring fault.”

Kate spoke next, “The other is that truth is more comfortable than fiction. Do they make any sense to you at all?”

“There was no sign of any scanning activity, was there?” Janet asked Ivan.

“No, but we didn't have Sarah hooked up, did we?” he pointed out.

“But I'm not sure they'd attribute to their God something they'd made up, would they?”

“Doesn't seem likely, and there was that signal.”

“What are you two talking about?” Kate asked, perplexed.

“I think we're talking about the authenticity of truth claims and the power of external corroborating evidence to overcome a natural resistance to any change in world-view,” Ivan said. Then pulled a face. “Or since I'm not allowed to hide behind any masks, we saw something inexplicable on the monitors, and my true love here came up with an uncomfortable explanation about what we were seeing, and now you've confirmed it. Not to mention scuppered any hope I had about explaining it away to myself and Janet as a wiring problem.”

“And I hadn't done more than hint to Ivan that I was getting uncomfortable trying to fit some of the recent events into my world-view,” Janet added.

“Ah. So that's why there was the third message!” Sarah exclaimed.

“Third message? What was that?” Ivan asked, curious.

“It was for us,” John said, “we think so, anyway. We mustn't worry so much, and we could finish playing with our toys if we wanted to. But then we should get on with the important things. We were rather wondering what He meant, but...”

“You should get us to sign away our immortal souls while we're still in shock at the thought we might have them?” suggested Janet, somewhat bitterly.

“Not at all,” Sarah said. “But I expect you've got the odd question or two, not to mention gaps in your knowledge and incorrect preconceptions.”

“In other words, friends,” Kate said, “let's either get us out of this equipment or get this over with. Then if you like, you can have the rest of the day off to pick our brains and talk things over. I don't imagine you'll be able to concentrate on much else anyway.”

“Urm, thanks, Kate,” Janet said. “Sorry for the negative way I just said that.”

“No problem, Janet. So, do we finish this?”

“Yes, let's,” John said. “I don't really like getting into this thing, you know.”

“OK, I'm ready,” Ivan said.

“Me too!” agreed Janet, turning back to her monitor.

Sarah, trying to stand watch over John and Kate with mental as well as physical eyes, joined her mind lightly with both of them. It was a little trickier linking with Kate than joining with John had become and also she had to be careful to not link too deeply with either of them. She opened her awareness to their surface thoughts and a little deeper, but not too deep. She didn't want to see every thought and injure herself, after all. For Ivan and Janet's benefit she spoke aloud, “Three, two, one, go!”

She saw John mentally put a kind of cage around the memory, and then he “pushed” it to the forefront of his mind. Kate's mind was listening and started to receive the memory. Sarah's physical eyes saw John grimace in the effort that it took to hold the memory there and was amazed that Mama had been able to do such “heavy lifting.” Or perhaps there was a better way. But in Kate's mind she saw how overwhelming it was. She cut the link, as she realised that she was making more work for Kate's mind, which she certainly didn't want to do. Instead, she gave herself a few brief peeks, purely from her own gift. Kate's mind was coping better now that she wasn't having to do whatever self-analysis was needed for the mental link to work, but Sarah could see she was tiring. Then the transfer was finished. [Seek peace now, Kate! Whatever you do, don't try to look inside it.]

“Finished!” she said aloud. “I've told Kate to cool off.”

It hadn't been quite as complex as a full scan, because the memory package had been there at the front of John's mind, and tightly defined. But there had been a lot of detail for Kate to take in. “Interesting!” Ivan said. “First results are in for John. Lots of memory related stuff, and odd fluctuations in your motor cortex.”

“And for Kate?” Sarah asked.

This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

“I'd say it was mostly what I'd expect for a startling new visual memory, but far higher activity than I've seen there before. An enormous level of processing. There was some other stuff happening early on, but that seemed to die down after a while.”

“That's interesting. I started off linked with her, but I thought it looked like she was struggling to cope with that, so I broke off and watched her the hard way. Speaking of which, I'd better see if I need to cool down for a while myself.”

John was concerned. He understood why Sarah had to break off the link, but he wasn't sure she should have continued monitoring. But he should probably rest too.

“Janet, Ivan, do you need me alert to get this contraption off my head?” he asked. “I feel fine, but I thought I should check too.”

“Oh, sorry, John,” Ivan said, “I was distracted by the data.” He released the straps, raised the helmet from John's head, and then carefully swung the crane to lower the helmet into its resting place.

John focussed on peace. The waters of that peaceful ocean tugged at his worries for Sarah and he let them go. He could sense her presence, as well as Kate's, and he was aware of that familiar, uncomfortable heat. There wasn't much for him, but unusually he could sense that it was strong in Kate. [Kate, how are you feeling?]

[Not very comfortable. Sarah said she could feel the heat coming off me, you too?]

[Yes. I'm mostly OK, so I'll get Janet to cool you down.] John said.

[Thanks, John.] Sarah said [Kate ordered me to stay and cool down myself — I am pretty hot, but nowhere as bad as Kate is — and I was having moral dilemmas about disobeying my boss as opposed to helping her recover.]

[Kate, why?] John asked.

[I didn't want to be stripped and watered in front of you and Ivan,] Kate said, rebelliously. [So you'd rather boil? I'll leave the room.]

[Thanks, John.]

He returned to the normal world and found a concerned Janet checking Kate's temperature.

“She's really hot, Janet. Worse than we've seen. The only reason Sarah didn't come straight back to tell us is that Kate ordered her to cool down herself. I think she needs the full wet-cloth treatment and maybe even some anti-inflammatories as a precaution, but she didn't want you to do that to her in front of us.”

“I thought you said your God told you it was safe!” Ivan said, as Janet started sponging down her face and neck. “No, I don't think He said safe, just that there wasn't any point in worrying.

That's not quite the same, you know. But I don't know how Kate got so hot, unless it was because of Sarah's watching. Unless.. No, surely not...”

“What?”

“Well, I know Sarah warned her not to try and look inside the bundle... But, well, you know Kate.”

“Yes, we know Kate. She might have decided she knew better,” Ivan said. “And that maybe a quick peak wouldn't hurt. There was another major spike in activity just as Sarah said it was all finished,” Janet confirmed.

“Oh, Kate!” John exclaimed. “Well, give her an ice pack or something. I think she's tried to cook her brain. I hope she recovers.”

“I'll give her a dose of anti-inflammatories,” Janet decided, “Then let's at least respect her wishes and you boys get out before I pour cold water all over her. And John, tell her she's been a very very silly woman.”

“I'll let you know if there’s a reply.” John went to his office. As he focussed on peace, he muttered a prayer.

“Father God, I don't know how foolish Kate has been, but heal her, I pray, if she has injured herself.”

He was aware of Sarah's presence first, and she told him privately, [John, she's told me what happened. She looked at the bundle, and I'm concerned.]

[We worked that out in the lab. There was a spike as you told Janet it was done. We shouldn't worry, especially not here. Have peace.] Addressing Kate, he passed on his message.

[Hello, Kate. Janet says you're a very very foolish woman.]

[She's right. But I'd like to think I'll live, otherwise I'd deprive her of the chance to tell me that face to face.]

[What were you thinking of, Kate?] Sarah asked.

[I wanted to make sure that it had arrived safely.]

[And was that so important that it was worth the risk?] John asked, incredulous.

[Maybe not. No, of course it wasn't. I just didn't realise how hard opening it would be.]

[I did warn you, Kate!] Sarah protested.

[I know. Sorry.]

[Kate, I'd say that this, plus telling Sarah not to tell Janet immediately that you were in trouble makes two errors of judgement in quick succession. What's wrong?]

[I don't know. Stupid pride I guess. No. I can't lie. It's Pete plus stupid pride.]

[Pete? Why?]

[The owner's lounge. He agrees with you, and I really really wanted him to agree with me. We ended up having a row. I guess I don't like being told what to do, and what with Pete disagreeing with me, I guess I just rebelled. Sorry, you've every right to be upset with me.]

[We're concerned about you, Kate, not upset. How are you really?] John asked.

[Hot. And I don't want to feel how badly my head hurts away from the peace.]

[I'll tell Janet,] John thought quickly.

[Thanks, John. And tell Pete I'm sorry, will you? Now, just in case.]

[OK, Kate.]

After passing on the news about Kate's pain he called Pete. “Hi, Pete, it's John. Urm, I'm not quite sure how to say this. Kate's made a mistake, over-using her gift. She's, um alive, but in a lot of pain. She's just asked me to tell you she's sorry. I'm not sure if she means for what just happened, or something else. She did say you'd had an argument last night.”

“But she'll be OK?”

“We don't know, Pete, we're in uncharted territory. Sarah passed out once from over using her gift, but we think Kate's done more than that. Janet's given her an anti-inflammatory, but we just don't know. If her brain swells anyway, well, that'd be bad, and I don't know how much you can heat braincells without permanent damage.”

“I'll come right over. You can talk to her, she's not unconscious?” John could hear him shutting off the tools of his artistry.

“Mind to mind. She's staying in the peace right now.”

“Sounds sensible. Tell her I'm sorry too and I forgive her, will you, and that I'll be praying.”

“See you soon!”

----------------------------------------

[Kate! Pete’s coming, he's sorry, he forgives you, and he'll be praying.]

[That's a good idea,] thought Sarah.

[Father God, heal our sister Kate, please. Don't let her unthinking pride harm her,] Sarah prayed fervently.

[Father, I have sinned,] prayed Kate. [Save me I pray from this pain. Don't let Pete's heart be broken, don't let my foolish stupidity separate us before we even marry. Help us to honour you in thought and word and deed, to understand each other better, and to be united in love.] Then the wordless worry that had been preying on her mind finally found the words to express itself: [Oh Father, it would be so much easier if he could know my thoughts, or I couldn't know his! How can I have closer contact with my colleagues and friends than my future husband, Lord?]

[Kate,] John thought gently, [remember what the Lord said? We mustn't worry so much. We thought it was about the transfer, but maybe it wasn't. Let the peace of the Lord take your worries. We'll leave you to pray this through.] Kate realised that John was right. She'd been holding on to those worries earlier, and in fact she still held them. She'd really let her temper fly with Pete, and had said things she wished she never had. Only the fact that her engagement ring was also her I.D. had stopped her flinging it at him, so furious had she been by the end. She regretted it now of course, but she'd really wanted to hurt him, and she was sure she'd done so. She really hoped she'd live long enough to let him know how much she regretted that desire.

But here surrounded by the strong love-filled peace of God, there was no place for worry. She realised that she'd sinned against the gift of access to this place by holding on to those worries here, and rejoiced as she felt that sin washed away by the gracious tide as soon as she realised it and confessed. Then, with the clarity of thought that came with that forgiveness, she realised how self-centred she'd been, for while she'd worried about the pain she'd caused him, that had been because of a worry that she might lose him.

Shock stopped her thoughts for a moment. Even what she'd thought were good thoughts had their roots in selfishness. She turned her thoughts to God, and once more she offered herself to her maker, feeling like a toddler fallen into thick mud. [Lord, thank you for the gift of forgiveness. I need far more than I thought. I'm so sinful, God! Please, make me clean.] Once, when she was young and paddling on the beach on a hot day on holiday, a freak wave had come from apparently nowhere and drenched her from head to toe. She'd felt shocked and refreshed and amazed all at once. She didn't see what enveloped her now coming either, but it poured round and through her, cool and powerful and refreshing. Washing her clean and taking the heat away in one go.

She was clean and she was healed and she was restored. It was time to leave, she knew. It was too easy to abuse the wonderful gift of this place. To just treat it as a cooling place for overheated minds was like thinking of a hospital as somewhere to get out of the rain. This was a place where falsehood was exposed and concerns washed away, where the clamours of the world and the body were silenced and faith was strengthened. Yes, all that and more. A place for the healing of souls. Hers had been healed and now it was time to try to help heal the wounds she'd caused to Pete's soul. She closed her eyes to the peace and opened them to the mundane world, with all its noises, petty concerns, aches and pains. Pete was there, looking worried. “Pete!” She smiled at her fiancé, “Sorry for last night.”

“Shouldn't you be resting still, Kate? Not that I'm not pleased to be able to talk to you, but I don't want stop you recovering. You are recovering, aren't you?” She heard the worry in his voice.

“God is gracious, Pete. It looks like you're going to have the chance to put up with my selfishness a bit longer. I'm fine. A bit weak maybe, but fine. How are you? I'm sorry for worrying you.”

“Shouldn't you still be resting, Kate?”

She had an idea. Maybe it would stop his worrying. Sitting up she grabbed his head with both hands and kissed him. “Pete, I'm fine.” Kiss. “God poured a bath full of water on my brain.” Kiss. “Or that's what it felt like.” Kiss. “I'm fine!” Kiss. “Though maybe a bit more feeble than normal,” she admitted, lying back down.

“You're not fine, Kate, you're beautiful, and I love you too, but you're acting strangely.”

“I am not acting strangely, Pete. I'm trying hard to reassure my man that I'm OK, that I love him and that I'm really really sorry for last night, all at the same time. Now do be a gentleman and call Janet in. I need her help for a bit.”

Somewhat confused but relieved, Pete knocked on Janet's door. “Janet, I think Kate said she's been miraculously healed. She claims to be fine but she seems a little unstable in the physical sense.” Then more quietly he added, “Maybe other senses too.”

“I heard that, Pete!” Kate called, with a laugh. “I'm fine!”

“But she's giving orders which must be a good sign. She'd like you to go and help her with something.”

“That's a relief,” Janet said and went to see what Kate wanted.

“Hi, Ivan, I didn't see you there,” Pete said, as Janet left.

Ivan looked up from what he was reading. “Hi, Pete. Good to hear that Kate's well. It wouldn't have made much sense otherwise.”

“You've lost me. What wouldn't have made sense?”

“Oh, the strange signals, messages, all that confusing stuff earlier.”

“Urm. Still lost.”

“Oh sorry. I'll explain.” And he did. “So, there you have it, your God dropped by to have a chat, we witnessed it, Occam’s razor cuts throat of atheistic fudging. Then Kate tries to boil her brains and where does that put the ‘Don't worry so much’ message?”

“So you were worrying that God got it wrong with the don't worry message?”

“Well, it doesn't exactly build confidence, does it?”

“I can see your point. But maybe the message was for all of you. There's been a lot of worry here, about all sorts of things — Kate's been worried silly about going public and extra threats, worried about giving away secrets. Worried about bad publicity, witch-hunts, attacks, bomb threats.”

“All very natural, don't you think?” Ivan asked.

“All totally pointless and showing a remarkable lack of trust in our creator,”

Kate said, as she and Janet came in.

“No sign of any swelling or anything,” Janet said. “Kate obviously needs to eat more regularly, but otherwise I'd give her a perfect bill of health.”

“Told you I was fine, Pete,” Kate smiled. “But I do want to bring our wedding date forward.”

“Really? I thought you wanted us to have time to get used to — what was the phrase? — ‘the idea of a shared life after so many years of singleness'?”

“Yes. Silly, wasn't I?”

“Urm...”

“You're allowed to agree with me, Pete. You're even allowed to disagree. And I hope I'm allowed to change my mind.”

“OK, Kate, yes, I think you were over cautious.”

“Good. I wonder, how about making it a double wedding. No, that's not fair on John and Sarah.”

“What's not fair on us?” John asked, coming down the corridor. “We've finished the report, at least a first draft.”

“Well done! I was just thinking that a long engagement is a waste of time.”

“Kate!” Pete pleaded, “Please don't go from one extreme to the other. Give us time to decide who to invite, please!”

“Oh, all right. Is everything coming together for your big day, Sarah?”

“I think so. To be honest I'd really love to escape the whole wedding lists and reception planning and all that stuff and just elope.”

“Ah, but then you'll upset people who want to be part of your day,” Janet said. “And they'll spill expensive food on their expensive clothes and they'll remember far more than I do because I'll be so busy.”

“Yes, that sounds about right,” John said.

“But by the end of it all we'll have some photographs to remind us, and each other to cherish.”

“Which is what it's all about, really, isn't it?”

“It is a lot of hassle to go through to get some photos though,” teased John.

“So, shall we elope then?” Sarah asked.

“Naah, think of the waste. We've already done most of it now.”

“Oh well.”

“Sorry to ask this Sarah,” Kate interrupted, “do you think you could pass on any advice some time?”

“What, other than run away and marry him in private, without the guest lists and everything?”

“Well, a little less drastic than that, yes.”

“Yes, Kate, I'd be happy to.”

“Great, you and metal man here can come for a meal and I'll pick your brains, how's that?”

“Would Thursday be OK?” Sarah answered.

“Oh, I was hoping tonight. But if you're busy...”

“The meat for tonight is already marinating.”

“Ah. OK.” Sarah could hear the disappointment.

“Would a lunchtime chat work instead, Kate? If so, pick a day.”

“It's a deal. Pete, do you want to be in on the conversation where we seal your doom?”

“I rather think I should, don't you?” he replied.

“Well, it saves discussion later.”

“Don't I get a say in when we marry, love?” Pete wondered, fairly sure what response he'd get. He was almost right.

“Of course, Pete. I was just assuming you're standing by what you said a while ago about wanting to marry sooner rather than later.”

“Kate! I said that in the context of you proposing to wait a couple of years, and you're now thinking I won't have thoughts about days verses weeks?”

“Sorry, Pete. John, Sarah, If Ivan and Janet don't need you, can you try to solve Enoch's challenge? I'm going to chat to Pete for a bit. Come on, Pete, let's go to my office.”

----------------------------------------

“It's OK, Kate. I can cope with changes of plan, really. Just do give people time to actually get the invitations, please.”

“Oh Pete! Don't worry!”

“I'm not worried, just, this is a bit of a new you, Kate.”

“Pete, it feels like God washed a lot of junk out of me. I don't want to be hyper-careful, that's what long engagements are for — to make certain the two people know and trust each other. But I know you, Pete, and I trust you. There's no reason except fear of change to be hyper-careful.”

“It wasn't hyper-careful that got me here this morning, Kate.”

“No, that was about sinful pride and rebellion.”

“Ah. And this?”

“This is about love and repentance, Pete. I got angry last night because of fear and pride and rebellion. I didn't want your honest answer. I wanted you to tell me these youngsters were wrong and I was right to be afraid. I almost wrecked our relationship because of wounded pride, and then this morning I almost died because I was fed up with Sarah being right, so I wanted to prove her wrong. Does that make sense?”

“Yes, I think it does. So that's why you're asking her advice now?”

“Urm. Maybe. I hadn't thought of that. It just seemed sensible. But Pete, God's given me a new chance. I want to take it and not lose it. Not lose you, either. I want you in my life, Pete, and I want unbreakable vows to bind us together. And since I'm greedy and selfish, I want those things soon.”

Pete didn't need much thought for his answer. He embraced her, and pausing only to say, “I must be selfish too,” he kissed her.

Of course the contact meant she was only too aware of his thoughts, which were at that moment parallel to her own. Except that reminded her: [Oh, Father God! Can our marriage work with us being unequal?]

“What's wrong, Kate?” Pete asked, noticing her tense up.

“I don't want to worry, but I do. This mind-reading thing. I don't want it to come between us, Pete. But it means that in some ways I'm, I'm closer to the others than I can be to you.”

“And you're afraid that you'll become frustrated with me that I can't understand you as well as they can?”

“Yes. And that you'll feel excluded.”

“And so you're really tempted to pray the gift into me like Sarah did to John?”

“Yes”

“But?”

“You said that you didn't want me to, and Sarah's prayer wasn't planned, or even intentional.”

“But nevertheless God answered it.”

“As He did mine, which was even less intentional.”

“But you'd been prophesied about.”

“Yes. No one told me that though.”

“But you worry, even though you've been told not to?”

“Yes. And I worry that if you change your mind and I do pray for you to receive the gift, the answer might be no, and that might disappoint us both and it'd be worse than it is now!”

“Kate. I think you're forgetting to trust God. He says not to worry. All it does is get you into a mess. So I'm going to pray for you, my love. OK?”

“Please. For all my years as a psycho-counsellor, I'm really not that sane at the moment, am I?”

Pete didn't respond to that last comment, but prayed: “Father God. You know Kate's worries. Help her to trust You. Help her to know that all is in Your hands, and she has no need to worry about these things, because Your plans are perfect. Help her to plan wisely and trust fully. Enable us both to serve You as faithful servants. May Your will be done in our lives, wherever Your will takes us.”

“Amen. Thank you, Pete. Before I go and tell Janet and Ivan that they can quiz me if they like, can I just ask? Wedding dates... What DO you think?”

“Urm, I think that if Sarah's expert advice says we can organise everything in a fortnight, which I honestly doubt, then you'd make me a very happy man if you agreed to share my life then. Much sooner than that and I don't think I'd have time to arrange a honeymoon.”

“I was wondering about that. Do you think we can go on one? There's so much happening!”

“I think we need to, love. Better if we go before you publish, surely.”

“Yes. You're right there, which reminds me. We should come up with some kind of timetable to publication.”

“Yes. Are you OK with the idea of letting a journalist in now?”

“Yes. I think so. Please make those calls.”

“OK, Kate. You're the boss. Any particular reporter or organisation I should call first?”

“I'll leave it to your discretion.”

“OK, how about we just invite the big five news/media conglomerates?”

“Maybe. I was wondering if it might actually suit a local organisation too.”

“And they'd be permitted to arrange any redistribution contracts they liked? Oh, they'd love it, I'm sure. But it would have to be a group with a major backer. Let me think a bit more.”

“OK, love. I'll get on to Security straight away to see if they're really happy with the idea.”

Sending the message to Security didn't take long, but she was annoyed to see she had some other messages that wanted urgent replies. But they weren't as important as being available to Ivan and Janet.