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Fairy Trigger: A British Tokusatsu Progression Fantasy
09. What would you do for a cheese toasty?

09. What would you do for a cheese toasty?

Betty Endeavour had never quite recovered from the social battering the family name was struck when her father had begun acting strangely. Maybe it was a desire to somehow re-capture the social standing she had in her youth. Maybe it there was just too much pride to turn and run like she felt her son had. Whatever the reason she had stayed in Stonebridge despite her sons protests and offers to help her move. However not regaining the same prestige she once enjoyed was not the same as it still being remembered, the past had been left in the past and in some ways she had been able to move on, new friends as new people moved to town… the ones that stayed anyway. It wasn’t unknown for people to just up and leave never to be seen again.

Her son she had seen again many times. What she had not been expecting was to be seeing him back here in Stonebridge.

“Hello Myles, what brings you home, and do introduce me to your handsome friends”

“Mum, this is my boss from work John, and this is I guess my other boss from my other work John.

“That must get confusing… because they are both called John not because they are bl…” Began Myles’s mother.

“We’ve covered this Mum, just let this one drop” interrupted Myles.

Pleased to meet you Ms. Endeavour” John Barrington introduced himself, shaking the woman’s hand. A swift kick from Myles stoped him trying to kiss the back of her hand like the refined gentleman he was.

After some brief small talk involving weather, traffic, the drive over and what the bloody hell have you done to your hair, Betty Endeavour brought out the tea and biscuits. Myles was in the belly of the beast, cushions, tacky ornaments and a sense of style that died in the 1970’s… This was where the real interrogation would take place. The best plan he had thought of was not to lie, just omit a lot of truth. They were going to look into the weird events that happened while he grew up. What was Tommy’s surname again? Not that it mattered, he would never recover those memories according to his friends so why borrow trouble.

“So I know you didn’t come here just to see me, or you wouldn’t have brought your friends. You have not set foot here since you got on the train to University.” Said Betty Endeavour with remarkably less venom in her voice than Myles had been expecting.

Betty Endeavour was a lot of things, prideful, stubborn. Dull was not one of them. She had seen him and taken appropriate offerings to her furry grandson not that long ago, so they were far from estranged. But it would be a lie to say she had not felt hurt that he would never come home. Sometimes she thought she understood why, but it was a fleeting thought that soon slipped from her mind like the idea itself was coated in oil.

“There were a lot of weird things that happened in this town Mum, for some reason we can’t remember most of it. My friends and I have a side job of taking care of that kind of thing, I genuinely think we will be able to help.”

“I don’t know what you are on about Myles, is this about that friends of yours who died, didn’t you do a huge poo in his garden or something.” Said Betty, remembering the past the way only a Mum could.

Both Johns had a suspicious coughing fit.

“I don’t want you causing trouble, my Father caused a fuss and look where that got him.” Said Betty, this time with every bit of venom Myles had expected.

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“It will be fine Mum, business John and I are on the newer side of things but fancy John is an expert in these things. We will be alright.” Myles had put on his most reassuring tone.

It didn’t work.

“Stop talking vague nonsense Myles Endeavour. Tell me what you are up to or don’t. But I do wish you would listen to me and leave things well enough alone.” Betty Endeavour let out a resigned sigh. “If you manage not to get into any sort of predicament come back here after. There is a box of your Grandfathers old things I was going to chuck in the bin so have a look and claim anything you want before it goes. I’ll also make you and these nice boys a nice lunch before you go.”

Myles had failed spectacularly to outwit his Mum. But at least there might be a cheese toasty after they sort out whatever is going on in the woods.

After they were a safe distance from Betty Endeavours house and well on their way to the woods John Barrington brought everyone to a halt.

“I need to apologise, I made assumptions. I thought it would be some low level fae slumming it, maybe a nest of something at worst. But If I’m right and I really hope I’m not, we are about to be in for a hell of a fight… Johnson Marquis, you are a good man but this should not be your first encounter… but we will need the help.” John Barrington spoke in a somber tone, most of the time he was all flash and bravado so this must be serious.

“What do we need to know John, what do you think we are walking into”

“There are fae that are not a person or even a monster, they are more… abstract. This one is a location, a place. It has caused us a lot of grief over the years. it is a patch of woodland, maybe half a square kilometre tops. but it moves around, it overlaps on patches of woodland in our world. It hunts children primarily, but it will settle for teenagers. It makes itself a cosy little hideaway. A safe space. then it closes its jaws. once in a while it will send something out to hunt if it is particularly hungry.”

“It must have been here nearly three decades” Said Myles

“I’m sorry Myles, I can’t speak for everyone in the community, but we all talk, one of us should have noticed it being here this long… You should not have had to grow up with this abomination on your doorstep. But in good news getting back for lunch on time won’t be an issue, time gets a bit funky in its domain.”

“So we can get more work done in less time. Nice!“ Said John Marquis who may have been missing the point but Myles didn’t want to ask.

John Barrington took out a Trigger from his inventory. It was a stylish British racing green with gold trim. It looked like a million pounds. He also took out, but from his jacket pocket a small bag that jingled and clinked. He threw both to John Marquis.

“Put the bag in your pocket first, then pull the trigger.”

John Marquis complied and pocketed the small bag. He extended his arm like he was going to fire a gun and activated the Trigger Myles could only describe as expensive. Soft green smoke enveloped the man then dark green armour flowed around him. Locking into place as metallic gold highlights stretched into life across the suit.

“THE SCYTHE IS REMORSELESS”

“Okay, thats not fair. His suit says a cooler thing than my suit as well.”

“Damn, this feels amazing. Let them all come at the big man now.” Said a very excited John Marquis. He admired the look of his new suit in every reflective surface they passed.

“And no waiting to be built… just pull n’ go” Continued the griping Myles. as he suited up himself.

“HARMLESS LITTLE BUNNY LEAPS FOR THE STARS, THAT'S NO ORDINARY RABBIT!”

“Myles I told you it’s a legacy, it was done building a long time ago. You however John should know of one of this suits quirks. It gets stronger with however much money you have on you, we nicknamed it the Cash armour. There is one slight downside.”

“No downside here, get me to a hole in the wall and try not to be jealous of my big fat savings account.” Said John Marquis, barely pulling himself away from another reflection. “Hold up Myles, did your suit just say harmless little bunny?”

Myles pretended not to hear his fellow Arkwright & Fletcher employee.

“John, unless that savings account is full of guinea and shillings you are out of luck. I threw you a bag of old shillings as a starter but you will need to find a way to calibrate the suit to modern currency or take up coin collecting. I know that sounds like a pain but the potential that suit has is staggering.” Said john Barrington, pausing at the end to bring up his Trigger.

“I’M LOOKING BETTER THAN NICE. I’M LOOKING… DANGEROUS.”

“I demand to re-record mine” Said Myles as they stepped up to the beginning of the woods. “And this nonsense” Myles gestured at the wooded area “Made my childhood weird, creepy, very probably ate my friend and is right now, standing in-between me and getting a cheese toasty for lunch”

“That was a terrible speech” Said John Marquis

The cat styled warrior nodded in agreement and the three walked into the green hell of Stonebridge.

The woods inside the wood, the part that felt wrong exhaled, or did the closest thing an eldritch location could manage to exhalation. It had settled here, eaten well for years and now these three were coming to see it off or maybe even kill it. This would not do. It still remembered how to deal with threats despite how many seasons it had been. it called up its own creatures, mockeries of real animals that had amused it on its travels. It had made to defend itself, but couldn't help delight in the terror these things brought to the mortal people it fed on. It selected carefully, the bear was a must… it rose fully formed from the ground, hunched yellow and hungry. Next came the pig, the pig was small and fast with razors for teeth and tusk. Last came the tiger. The tiger was relentless, quick and agile, but with frightening amounts of energy. These would make short work of the interlopers. It could give them all the time they need.