I went straight to the bedroom when I got home, ditching my trashed suit for a pair of loose shorts and a tank top. Wandering into the kitchen, I saw Emmy and Angela out on the deck, having lunch with Jenna and Jen.
“Hey, baby!” Angela called out when she spotted me. She jumped up to come inside and give me a kiss, but checked up once she got a good look at me.
“What happened? Did you get in a crash?” she asked, concerned as she looked at the bandage on my knee and the wraps on my hands. She touched my cheek gently, asking if it hurt, and I realized that yeah, it did a bit.
“No, I was in a fight,” I said as the others came inside to see what was going on. “My Armani suit is toast.”
“Oh, no!” Emmy said. “The gray linen suit? I liked that on you.”
“You really got in a fight?” Jenna asked.
“I thought you said you knew her,” Jen said to Jenna. “Of course she got in a fight.”
“I’m glad you’re O.K.,” Angela said, wrapping me in a gentle hug, careful in case I was sore.
“I’m O.K.,” I agreed. “I could use some ice for my knee, but other than that it’s just bruises and scrapes.”
Angela took my hand and led me to the kitchen and sat me down while she hunted for a ziplock bag for ice.
“Are you hungry?” Emmy asked. “We have chicken salad, and fresh grapefruit juice.”
“Yeah, that’d be great, thanks,” I said, accepting the ice pack from Angela.
“So what happened?” Jen asked. “And who did you beat up this time?”
“Some professional UFC fighter named Linda Rubio,” I said. “She’d heard I was a fighter and came to my gym to get me to fight. I told her to get lost, so she waited in the parking lot until I came out. She jumped me, I beat her up,” I said, savoring the feel of the acid in the juice on my cut lip.
“Seriously, you’re some kind of magnet for this sort of thing,” Jen said, shaking her head.
“This happens a lot? I heard about the thing in Arizona, but…” Jenna asked.
“One time in a bar in Austin some drunk chick threatened Leah with a broken bottle, just like in the movies, right? But Leah just calmly knocked her out cold, like it was no big deal,” Jen said. “What happened in Arizona?”
Jenna told Jen about the fight at the barbecue place in Wilcox, getting a lot of the details completely wrong, but whatever. I didn’t correct her, and neither did Angela or Emmy, to my surprise.
“Yeah, that sounds believable,” Jen said when Jenna finished with the story. “Like I said, trouble seems to find Leah.”
After I finished lunch, Angela dragged me back to our bathroom to check me over and make sure all my scrapes were clean. She removed my bandages, most of which weren’t really necessary. I wasn’t actually bleeding anymore, and the worst road rash on my knee was superficial. Normally a shower with my dark-haired beauty would be a lot of fun, but Angela focused on cleaning me up and resisted my feeble attempts to get in a bit of sexy time. She scrubbed me carefully, then dried me off and didn’t bother with any new bandages.
“They will heal better if they can breathe,” Angela pronounced, but I wasn’t actually sure that was true. Still, she seemed confident, and so I went along with it. I did like it when she kissed my owies to make them better. Even if it didn’t help my scrapes any, it made my heart feel better. This wonderful woman was going to make an amazing mother, hopefully by this time next year.
Rejoining the group out on the deck, I poured myself a Cuba Libre to help relax.
“Hey, if you’re bartending, I’ll take one, too,” Jen said from her lounge chair.
“If you have a bottle open, maybe some white wine?” requested Jenna, and Emmy and Angela both chimed in that they’d like some, too. I dutifully opened a bottle of Riesling and poured three glasses, then mixed some rum and Coke for Jen, adding a squeeze of lime.
Once the excitement of hearing about my fight wore off, the conversation turned to buying art for the LA house. I really had nothing useful to add to the conversation that had obviously been going on before I got home, so I just sipped my drink and relaxed in the shade.
Every now and then a question required my, “Uh huh,” or, “Yeah, sounds good,” but otherwise I just let myself drift, not really paying attention to the specific words. The sound of the birds in the trees, the voices of my two beloved wives and our two friends… It was peaceful and calming, just what I needed after the morning I’d had.
Next thing I knew, Emmy was shaking my shoulder to wake me up. “I think you need a nap,” she said, her voice gentle.
“I was taking a nap,” I said, still a bit groggy. This got a laugh from Jen and Jenna, and a little smile from Emmy.
“I think you would be more comfortable in bed,” she said, urging me to get up and go to our bedroom.
“No, it’s alright,” I said, but when I tried to sit up I realized I actually was quite sore.
“What is wrong?” Emmy asked, concerned by my groan of discomfort.
“I’m just really feeling, you know, like I got in a fight or something,” I said. “Maybe instead of a nap I should jump in the Jacuzzi for a while.”
“You do not think the water would be painful for your scrapes?”
“Maybe a bit,” I acknowledged. “But mostly now it’s my muscles that are sore.”
“I think she should do some hot tubbing,” Jen said. “In fact, I’m feeling like some hot water and bubbles might be good for me, too. I’ll keep her company.”
“Wait a minute,” Jenna said, sitting up in her seat. “I didn’t know this was going to turn into a hot tub party. I didn’t bring my bathing suit.”
“I didn’t bring mine, either,” Jen said with a lascivious leer. “Not gonna stop me.”
“Are we gonna be skinny-dipping, then?” Jenna asked, her eyes wide.
“Hell yes,” Jen replied, starting to strip off her clothes.
Angela looked at me, concerned that things might be getting out of hand, but I just shrugged.
“Why not?” I asked, slowly getting to my feet and crossing the deck to remove the hot tub’s cover and turn the jets on.
Jen wasted no time slipping into the hot water, already nude.
“Jen, I like your new tattoos,” I said. “Well, the dragon and the heart, anyway. I’m not so sure about the chest plate.”
“I’ve had these for a while,” she said, looking down at the filigree design between her breasts.
“I guess I just haven’t seen you naked in a while,” I admitted.
“You’ve seen her naked before?” Jenna asked, trying to decide if she was going to skinny dip or not.
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“The very first time we met, she got a better view than my gynecologist,” Jen said with a smirk.
“It’s true,” I said, turning to Jenna. “The first time we ever met, she spread her legs for me.”
“I never heard this story,” Angela said, joining us by the hot tub.
“It’s a great story,” Jen said. “Hey, hand me the TV remote, will you?”
Angela handed her the remote, puzzled by the request.
I could see that Angela and Jenna wanted to join Jen in the tub, but weren’t sure about skinny dipping. It was up to me, and whether I took off my clothes or not.
I looked at Jen, grinning wolfishly and sitting high enough that her breasts were well out of the water, making sure we all saw.
‘Sure, why not?’ I thought to myself, so I ditched my tank top and slid my shorts down and tossed them all on one of the lounge chairs, climbing in to join Jen.
“Holy fuck,” Jenna said, and I turned to look at her. She had her hand over her mouth, looking me up and down, her eyes wide. She turned to look at Angela and said, “You said she was … but…”
“Jesus fuck, Leah,” Jen said as I slid down into the hot water. “You are built like the proverbial brick outhouse.”
“Seriously,” Jenna said. “I mean, seriously, Lee. Angela said you were big, and I mean, I’ve seen you in shorts and whatever, but seeing you like this…”
“Naked, you mean?” I asked, teasing.
“Well, yeah,” Jenna agreed.
While we were talking, Emmy slipped quietly into the hot tub, also completely free of any swim suit. This prompted Angela to strip down and join us, leaving Jenna as the only one not in the water. Of course we were all staring at her, making it that much more embarrassing for her to take off her own clothes while we watched.
“Quid pro quo,” I reminded her, making her blush even redder. Unable to face us, she turned away before stripping off her clothes.
When her underwear slipped down around her ankles I let out a wolf whistle, saying, “Check out that bubble butt!”
Jenna turned around quickly, one arm across her breasts and the other hand covering her crotch. She walked like that to the hot tub, but needed her hands to climb into the Jacuzzi, making the effort of covering up go to waste.
“Nice rack, Jenna,” I said.
“I guess I deserved that,” she admitted once her breasts were well hidden by the water.
“No, I’m serious,” I said. “You have a nice body, and your boobs are really pretty. Nothing to be ashamed of there.”
“She’s not wrong,” Jen agreed. “Natural boobs like yours are the hotness these days. A pair like yours could get you decent work in a club.”
“Thanks, I guess?” Jenna said, still feeling bashful.
Jen had surfed through the smart TV’s menu and found what she wanted, so she directed us all to look at the screen as she played The Downfall’s video for “I want you to want me.”
“So, Jen,” Jen said. “The story is that Emmy and the boys wanted to do a video for this song, right? So Leah stopped at the club I worked at and asked who their best pole dancer was. The bartender told her that was me, and I’d be dancing the next day. So Leah came back and watched my routine, then offered me a bunch of money to teach her girlfriend- they weren’t married yet- how to pole dance. I actually choreographed this routine Emmy’s doing here, you see? So yeah, Leah watched me dance naked before we even really talked.”
“And that’s how you met Lee?” Jenna asked.
“Yeah, at the video shoot,” Jen agreed. “Next thing you know…”
“How did you and Emmy meet?” Jenna asked me.
“High school,” I said, “But you knew that.”
“I guess I meant ‘how did you guys fall in love?’,” Jenna corrected.
“I guess it was just kind of gradual, you know? We were spending a lot of time together, and just- next thing you know…” I said, parroting what Jen had said. “How did you and Andy meet?”
“It was typical meet-cute,” Jenna said, thinking back. “We were both sophomores, and first day of fall term we wound up sitting next to each other in Calculus class. He hadn’t gotten the textbook yet, so he asked if he could share mine. We went to lunch together after that, and got to talking, you know? Next thing you know…” she said, getting a laugh from everybody.
The conversation stayed light and soon enough Jenna grew more comfortable, feeling less awkward about being naked.
After a while, and a few more rounds of drinks, Jenna’s phone rang and she got out of the tub to answer without any concerns for modesty.
“Oh, shit!” she said. “Andy’s here! He tried the doorbell, but I guess we didn’t hear it.”
“I think it’s busted,” I said. “Just tell him to come on back.”
“But we’re all naked!” Jenna said, suddenly becoming aware of her own nudity.
“He’s seen me naked before,” I said with a shrug. “I’m O.K. with it.”
“I’m sure he’d love this,” Jenna said. “Five naked women in a hot tub? Isn’t that every guy’s fantasy?”
Angela and Emmy both looked at me for some sort of signal, but I just shrugged. “You guys do what you want. I’m fine with Andy seeing me naked. Like I said, he’s seen me with no clothes on before.”
“I’m getting out,” Angela said, displaying surprising modesty for someone who posts implied nudes online. She stood up, and I took a moment to appreciate her amazing body before she wrapped herself in one of the big towels from the cabinet.
“I think I will, too,” Emmy said, following Angela’s lead.
I looked over at Jen, who just shrugged. “I don’t give a fuck, one way or another,” she said, so I settled back down into the hot water. I was getting pretty well pruned up by this point, but it did feel good on my muscles, so I wanted to stay in longer. If that meant flashing Andy, well, that was fine.
Jenna ushered Andy back and I waved him to the bar. “We’ve all got a couple of drinks in us already, so you need to get caught up.”
“Lee, are you naked?” he asked.
“Hey! I am, too!” Jen said, indignant. To prove her point, she sat up on the edge of the hot tub, to show off the fact she wasn’t merely topless.
Seeing Angela, Emmy and Jenna’s towels, he realized that maybe he’d missed out on something special. “Wait- were you all skinny dipping?”
“You missed it,” Jenna said, opening up her towel and flashing him.
“Damn it!” Andy said. Looking up at the skies, he said, “Why, God, why did you curse me with bad traffic?”
“It’s not too late for you to join Leah and me,” Jen said, giving Jenna a wink.
“But mix me up another Old Fashioned before you do,” I said, again pointing at the bar. “You know how I like ‘em.”
Andy dutifully stepped behind the bar and started pouring. “I can’t believe I missed you guys all naked in the hot tub,” he said mournfully. “Jen, you want anything?” he asked, being good about not ogling her too much.
“Another rum and Coke?” Jen requested.
“Like Jen said, some of us still are naked in the hot tub. Ditch those clothes and come on in,” I told him as he handed me my drink. I was feeling pretty well buzzed by this point, but that was fine.
Jenna wrapped her arms around him from behind. “It’s O.K. if you wanna,” she told him.
Jen climbed out of the hot tub and stretched ostentatiously, of course drawing everyone’s eyes. She announced she was going to swim a little bit, then slipped into our small deck pool and did a few backstrokes, which of course made her boobs jiggle right above the water.
“It’s alright to look,” Jenna assured Andy. “Jen wants you to look.”
“It’s a trap!” Andy said, making a point of not looking anywhere near the pool.
Jenna laughed, and reached up and turned his head towards where Jen was swimming. “No, I’m serious. We’re all grown-ups, right? What’s the big deal, if Jen and Leah are exhibitionists, anyway?”
“Still not actually an exhibitionist,” I protested.
“I am,” Jen countered from the pool.
Andy looked back at me and asked, “Lee, seriously, what is going on here?”
“I was feeling really achy and sore and thought I’d get in some Jacuzzi time. I mentioned it, and next thing you know, we were all hot tubbing naked,” I told him.
“Just like that?” he asked.
“Yeah, pretty much,” I confirmed. “But when you showed up, Angela, Jenna and Emmy all got out.”
“Why were you achy and sore?”
“Oh, you know, I got in a fight this morning,” I said with a shrug.
“That explains your black eye,” he said.
“Aw, shit,” I said. “I didn’t realize I was getting a black eye.”
“Well, it’s not too bad, really,” he said, making sure to keep his eyes above my neck.
“Andy,” I said. “I might not actually be an exhibitionist, but I wouldn’t still be in this tub if I was worried about you seeing me naked. Don’t worry about it. I mean, you’ve already seen me naked before.”
“Yeah, but that was when we were eleven,” he countered.
“It’s still me.”
“You sure don’t look like you did then,” he said. “You didn’t have shoulders like that back then, or those arms.”
“Or these boobs,” I said.
“Or those boobs,” Andy agreed.
“Take off your clothes and join me in here,” I said. “If you do, I’d bet that some of the others will ditch their towels.”
“I will if you do,” Jenna agreed.
Andy looked around, then came to a decision. He kicked off his shoes, then toed off his socks. He pulled his shirt off over his head, tossing it on an empty chair. With one last glance around, he undid the button and fly on his shorts and let them fall down around his ankles, revealing that he ran commando.
“If I’d have known, I would have manscaped a bit better,” he joked, which of course made me look at his package. His pubes weren’t wildly unruly, so he must keep them trimmed with some regularity, I thought.
Once fully naked, Andy climbed into the hot tub with me, his chin held high.
“So- tell me about this fight,” he said, acting nonchalant.
Jenna slipped out of her towel and sunk into the water next to her fiancé.
Jen had gotten out of the pool and settled into a lounge chair in the sun, not bothering to cover up at all (and making sure she was in Andy’s field of view).
I told him the whole story of what had happened at the gym, and he made all the right comments at all the right moments. “What a bitch!” He said when I told him she threatened to sue. “But she jumped you!”
“I told her my lawyers would treat her rougher than I did,” I said. “My lawyers are completely merciless, but I’m only mostly merciless.”
Andy laughed at that and raised his hand for a high five, which I returned. “Here's to bloodthirsty lawyers!"
“This whole thing is crazy,” Jenna said. “I mean, who in their right mind would pick a fight against that?” She asked, indicating me.
“Not me,” Andy agreed. “I mean, even when we were kids, Leah was one hell of a fighter. She got into a lot of fights, and I don’t think she ever lost a single one. Heck, that guy I told you about at the nude beach? I one hundred per cent guarantee she would’ve used his nuts as a punching bag if he hadn’t booked it.”
“One hundred per cent,” I agreed, making a fist and waving it.