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Emmy And Me
Coming Out

Coming Out

Returning my focus to work, I read through the portfolio Sandy had put together on a brewpub in Venice. I'd come to trust his instincts, so I was ready to rubber-stamp the purchase when something caught my eye. He’d included an article from GQ from the year before labeling the main street in Venice “The Hippest Street In America.” It was the street I'd randomly driven down a month before, the one with the Doc Marten shoe store. Sandy had included the article to show the district’s current appeal- just the sort of intangible he was so good at spotting, but here it was backed up by a national publication.

I figured it might be a good place to grab lunch, to take a look at the brewpub myself, just for one last confirmation.

I was busy scrolling up and down the avenue using Google’s Street View, mostly just wasting time when somebody knocked on my office door.

Honestly, I'd forgotten I ever shut it, since I usually keep it wide open to encourage communication within the office.

I got up and opened the door, swinging it wide, intending to leave it open after whoever it was was done with whatever it was they’d come for.

Jake was standing there, and peeking out from behind him was a teenaged girl.

“Is this Makayla?” I asked.

“Kay, come out and say hi to my boss, Mrs. Farmer,” Jake said, encouraging the girl.

“Hi,” Makayla said, slowly edging out from behind her grandfather.

“Makayla, Ja- your grandfather told me that you might be interested in a career in music. Is that right?” I asked, completely at a loss on how to have this talk.

“Yeah,” she agreed, finally out in the open. “Grampa told me that you’re married to Emmy Lascaux. Is it true?”

“Hey, why don’t you come in to my office and we can talk. It’s more comfortable than just standing around like this,” I suggested, heading back to my desk. I grabbed my chair and rolled it around so the desk wouldn't be in the middle of our conversation as Jake steered the girl into one of the two chairs facing my desk.

On her way to sit down, Makayla spotted the poster I’d had hung opposite my desk and seemed about to say something, but held it in.

Once everybody was seated, I told Makayla that yes, Emmy and I had been married for a few years now.

“We got married young, but we both knew it was what we wanted, so why put it off?” I said.

“She’s so amazing,” Makayla said. “She can play the guitar, she sings, and she’s totally beautiful.”

“That’s all true,” I agreed. “But those aren’t why I fell in love with her, you know.”

“What do you mean?” the girl asked.

“I fell in love with Emmy because she’s sweet, loving, and kind. She’s always polite, even when people are rude. She taught me to be my own person, and ignore what other people might think or say about me.”

“Like… like what?” Makayla asked.

“Well, we met at the beginning of our senior year of high school,” I said. “At first, we were just friends, you know? But before long, I realized I was in love with her, and she was in love with me. I was worried about everybody in school finding out I was gay, but Emmy just didn’t care what anybody said, and following her example, I stopped caring, too.”

“What kind of things?” Makayla asked, leaning forward.

“Mean things,” I said. “Insults designed to hurt my feelings, or make me seem lesser, somehow. These other kids thought that being gay was somehow wrong, and they thought it was their job to tell me so.”

“What did you do?” Makayla asked.

“I ignored them. Just plain ignored ‘em. The thing is, the happiness that loving Emmy brought me was so much more important to me than what these kids I didn’t even care about thought or said, that it just didn’t matter. I was happy, and they weren’t going to take that away from me.”

“I read that you got in a lot of fights in school,” Makayla said.

“Seriously?” I asked. Shaking my head, I said “I got in one fight in school, ever. Just one. Two girls who hated me tried to beat me up in the bathroom one time. That’s it. The only fight in my entire time in school. I don’t know who it is that keeps spreading these stories about me online, but seriously- don’t believe what you read online,” I said.

“Did they?” Makayla asked, leaning forward.

“Did they what?” I asked, not sure what she meant.

“Did they beat you up?” Makayla clarified.

Laughing, I said, “Oh, heck no. I pounded the two of ‘em pretty hard! They were afraid of me for the rest of the school year.”

“Were you really big in school?" Makayla asked. “I mean,” she added, realizing she’d put her foot in her mouth a bit, “you look really big and strong now. Were you back then, too?”

“Well, I was the tallest kid in my class in fifth grade, but then some of the boys started getting taller than me. My senior year, I was the tallest girl in school, but I wasn’t all that strong. I didn’t really get strong until college, when I really worked out a ton. How about you? Are you strong?”

“No, I’m not strong. But I am fast- I like to run,” Makayla answered.

“Are you on the track team?” I asked.

“My school really doesn’t have a track team. We just run and stuff in P.E.”

“You’re thirteen, right? Just do whatever sports you like just because you like it right now. In high school you can start running, or swimming, or playing basketball or whatever more seriously. Right now, just enjoy yourself.”

Turning to Jake, I asked, “Do you guys have any lunch plans?”

“No, no plans,” Jake answered. “I was thinking I’d take Kay for a burger or something, but that’s about the extent of it.”

“There’s a place in Venice I’d like to check out. If you’ll drive, I’ll buy lunch.”

“Venice Beach? It’ll take us over half an hour to get there,” Jake objected.

“Don’t worry. The boss won’t yell at you for taking a long lunch,” I said, getting a little laugh from Makayla.

We all piled into Jake’s older Lexus, since my car was a two-seater. On the drive south, Makayla and I talked about school, about music (especially Emmy’s), about sports, and so on. There was no mention of boys in there, anywhere. Since the girl was thirteen years old and in middle school, boys would have been an expected part of the conversation if they’d held any interest for her at all.

The brewpub had just the right kind of hipster vibe, and the friendly waiter that took our orders was heavily tattooed. He’d introduced himself as Tommy, then did an excellent job of running down the list of daily specials, including a daily kid’s special, to my surprise.

“Why did you want to come here?” Jake asked, once our drinks had been delivered.

“I don’t know if you met Sandy yet,” I answered, sipping my lemonade (served in a Mason jar, of course). “Aussie guy, sorta tall, kinda loud?”

“We haven’t actually been introduced, but I have seen a guy like that around the office a few times,” admitted Jake.

“Well, he’s a big part of one of my other businesses- the hospitality division. He is my scout- he identifies places like this, restaurants, bars, nightclubs, that sort of thing. Places that are doing O.K., but the owners want to sell for one reason or another. This place might be the first of his local portfolio.”

“Local? He’s from the San Jose office?”

This content has been misappropriated from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

“Yeah, but he’s moving down here at the end of the summer. Sandy and a few others are relocating down here to help establish our hospitality presence in the L.A. area.”

“So this is why you’ve been talking about moving our office because we need more space,” Jake said, nodding his understanding. “It isn’t because you’re going to bring in additional property managers.”

“Up in San Jose I had the property management and development divisions in one set of offices and the hospitality division in another, but adjoining, space. They looked separate from the outside, but shared a lot of common space inside. That way I didn’t have to split my time between physical locations. The entertainment division was separate, with an office in San Francisco, but I really had no hand in that anyway so that didn’t matter. I’d really like to do the same thing down here, but maybe even take it a step further,” I said.

“I get it now,” Jake said, nodding in agreement. “There’s been talk that some jobs may get axed and new blood brought in with the relo.”

“Well, some jobs may get axed, but that’s separate from the relocation. Keep that under your hat,” I added.

“So why this place?” Jake asked, looking around.

“It makes money, has growth potential, and is fairly new. You know the average life expectancy of a restaurant in the U.S. is only four and a half years? So statistically, this place only has another two, three years before it fails or gets reworked into something else. This place, though, has good numbers. Here, let me show you,” I said, pulling the folder out of my briefcase.

Just then, Tommy the waiter came by to ask if we needed anything. I glanced around and saw the crowd was light, since we were early for the lunch crowd.

“Tommy,” I said. “Can we have five minutes of your time? I’d like to ask you some questions about this restaurant.”

Looking suddenly concerned, Tommy said, “Let me get the manager,” and started to back away.

“No, it’s O.K.,” I reassured him. “It’s you I want to talk to.”

“What about?” he asked, still obviously uncomfortable.

“Here’s the deal,” I said, pointing to the folder that Jake held in his hands. “I’m going to buy this restaurant, and I wanted to get some impressions that aren’t in the stuff the CPAs care about. You work here, you see how things are run, how business is doing, that kind of thing. What I want to know is what is it like to be in the trenches, I guess is one way to put it. If I’m going to drop almost two million dollars on this place, I’d like a feel for what I’m buying.”

Glancing around, Tommy said, “Yeah, O.K., I guess I can talk for a few. So it’s really true? Thomas really is going to sell?”

“The paperwork I have right here says he is,” I confirmed.

“So what do you want to know?” Tommy asked, feeling a bit more comfortable with the situation.

“Do you work full-time?" I asked.

“Yeah, sure. I mean, I could always use more hours, right? But yeah, I generally get my forty in.”

“How is the pay relative to your costs? Can you live on the paycheck you get here?” I asked.

Clearly surprised by this line of questions, Tommy said, “Well, I’ve got, like, two roommates, but yeah, we make rent every month. I’ve got enough left over for what I want, so yeah, sure, I guess the pay is O.K.”

“Looking at the paperwork, it seems as if only about half the staff are full-time. Why is that?”

“Well, we’ve got a lot of students, you know? College doesn’t leave much room to put in full weeks, if you get what I mean,” Tommy answered.

“So it isn’t that the management is keeping people part-time to keep costs down?”

“What? No, Thomas doesn’t play that game. He’s a good boss, not like a lot of guys.”

“So, one last question. Can you see yourself working here in, say, five years?” I asked.

“Um, well, I mean, I guess,” Tommy said. “It’s a decent job, and I like the people, you know? I’m not sure I want to be a waiter all my life, but it pays the bills, right?”

“Thanks, Tommy,” I said. “You might have just earned yourself a raise. I’ll talk to you in a couple of weeks when everything gets finalized.”

Smiling, Tommy reverted back to attentive waiter mode and said, “So, in the meantime, is there anything I can get you folks?”

“Are you really gonna buy this restaurant?” Makayla asked, amazed.

“Yeah, I think I am,” I said. “If the food is any good.”

“Kay, Leah here is really good with numbers. She got a business degree from Stanford and really knows what she’s doing.”

“Makayla,” I said, leaning in. “Let me tell you a secret.”

“What?” she asked, her eyes wide as she leaned in to hear what I had to say.

“The trick to success in business, and in life, is to find people who are good at what they do, and to rely on them to do their best. Like your grampa, here,” I said, indicating Jake. “He’s really good at his job. I mean, really good. I’m really glad he works for me, and not for one of my competitors.”

“Grampa?” Makayla asked.

“Yep. Your grampa is my best property manager here in Los Angeles, and I trust him to do his job well, so I don’t have to even think about it at all. Like this waiter, Tommy. He seems pretty good, don’t you think?” I asked.

“Yeah, and I like his tattoos,” agreed Makayla.

“He’s good-looking, too, so that helps,” I said.

“I guess,” Makayla said, looking doubtful.

“Not your type?” I asked, fishing even though I was pretty sure by this point.

“I think-” she said, then looked at Jake, who was leafing through the file on the restaurant and making a point of not listening. “I think I like girls, better,” Makayla said, barely above a whisper.

“Me, too,” I whispered back. “But you know what?”

“What?” Makayla asked, still whispering.

“I don’t keep the fact that I like girls a secret, and I don’t think you need to, either. Can I tell you another secret?” I asked, still leaning way in and whispering.

“What?” Makayla asked.

“I think your family knows. I think that’s why your grampa wanted us to meet, so we could talk about what it’s like to like other girls.”

“Seriously?”

“I’m pretty sure. Should I ask him?” I whispered, glancing over at Jake, who was still doing his best to not notice our chat.

“What if he… What would my mom say?” Makayla asked, worried.

“She’d say she loves you and knew all along, that’s what,” I said. “Bet me five dollars. Your grampa knows I’m gay, right? And he doesn’t care at all. He loves you. He’s gonna love you just the same, gay or not.”

Makayla sat up and looked over at her grandfather. “Grampa Jake?” she asked, her voice unsteady.

“Yeah, Kay?” Jake asked, looking up from the folder.

“I think- no, I know, I’m gay,” Makayla announced.

“Well, sure, of course you are,” Jake said, then went back to reading the papers in his hand.

“See?” I asked. “That wasn’t hard, was it?”

“You were right- he knew already!” Makayla said, a look of immense relief on her young face.

“Of course he did,” I said. “And you know what? He’s known for a long time. And he loves you just the same. I’m sure your mom does, too.”

“Leah,” Jake said, interrupting our coming-out moment. “I don’t know anything about this industry, but these numbers look solid. As a complete layman, I’d say that you should go ahead and buy the place.”

Grateful for the change of topic, I said, “Yeah, Sandy is really good at putting these deals together. I think this place is a winner.”

“Another thing that struck me,” Jake mused. “This place makes money, but not a whole heck of a lot, to be honest. Is this typical?”

“Yeah, that’s the way the hospitality industry is,” I agreed. “There’s money to make, but not as much as in a lot of fields.”

“So why do it, then? A small apartment building might cost about the same, but it’ll have a much higher ROI.”

“Let me tell you a secret, Jake.” I said. “I’m in the hospitality market because it employs a heck of a lot of people.”

At the puzzled look on his face, I said, “I run my businesses to put people to work. That’s what it’s all about.”

“So why property management?”

“To give people good places to live at fair prices,” I replied. “Making money is just the happy by-product. Like you said on that first day we went out to do site inspections- doing well by doing good.”

Then, changing the subject, I said, “Oh, and by the way, Makayla just came out of the closet.”

“Yeah, I got that,” Jake agreed. Turning to his granddaughter, Jake said, “Kay, I’m glad you’re finally ready to tell us all that you’re gay, but you know what? We already all know.”

“See? What did I say?” I asked the girl. “And you know what? Being honest with your family is a first start. It only gets easier from now on out. Gimme a high five,” I said, holding up my hand, which Makayla reflexively slapped.

“Wait- why are we high fiving?” she asked.

“To coming out of the closet. To being honest with your family, and maybe, when you’re ready, with your friends. To being who you are. To ignoring those who will try to put you down because of it. Most of all, to being true to yourself.”

Just then, Tommy the waiter appeared with Makayla’s baby Hawaiian burger and my chicken breast sandwich. “I’m sorry, but I couldn’t help but overhear,” he said to Makayla. “It sounds as if you just told people for the very first time that you’re gay. That’s completely awesome- I am, too,” he said, and held his hand up for another high five, and Makayla slapped his hand, too. “Seriously, what she said,” Tommy said, indicating me, “Is completely true. Being out is so, so much better. Even the bad parts are still better than lying to everyone around you. You’ll see.”

I gave him a ‘thanks’ look as he left to go get Jake’s lunch. “See?” I said to Makayla. “More people are going to be happy for you than you might think. So- are you going to go to the next Pride Parade with me and Emmy?”

“Can I? Really?” she asked.

“Only if it’s O.K. with your family,” I said, realizing that I didn’t know if her parents were together or not. In fact, I knew nothing about her situation other than that Jake was her grandfather, but that’s it.

“I’ll ask!” Makayla said, energized by the thought, and in truth, by coming out of the closet. It was obvious that a giant weight had been lifted off her little shoulders, and I was very pleased with myself that I was able to help.

Lunch was good, and halfway through lunch Makayla asked me how it was I said, “Yup. Gonna buy the place,” getting a laugh.

After lunch, I emailed Sandy. “Move on the deal,” I said, keeping it simple. Of course, there were a bunch of texts from the Saturday gang, but I didn’t respond. ‘Let them stew,’ I thought, and moved on to an email from James in Palo Alto.

“Hey, Leah, is it O.K. if I invite a few others? I was thinking Justin, and maybe Amash. What do you think?” he asked.

“Cool with me,” I replied. “I want to keep the track fairly empty, so maybe no more than four from up there? And seriously, bring Imogen down. You can stay at our place if you want- I know Emmy would love to have you guys over for a few days.”

The rest of the day was spent with work, and I was good about it.

That evening, I mentioned to Emmy that I’d invited James and Imogen to stay at our place and she was excited about the the idea.

“Did James say they would stay here?” she asked, her face lit up.

“No, he hasn’t said one way or another. I’m sure he had to wait until he got home to talk to Imogen about it before committing,” I said. “He’ll probably let me know by tomorrow.”

“It would be lovely to have them here,” Emmy said, thinking about having house guests.

“Yeah, it would,” I agreed. I liked James and Imogen, and the two of them really seemed to like Emmy as well, so it was all good as far as I could tell.

“Oh, I talked to Andy today,” Emmy said. “He asked if it would be O.K. to bring his fiancée to dinner, and of course I told him it would.”

“When is this dinner going to happen?” I asked.

“That has yet to be determined,” Emmy replied. “When would work for you?”

“Any time at all,”I said.