The cavern was broad and tall, tall enough Jon didn’t feel strange pitching a tent in it. Around him, other devotees of the Death Cult erected their tents. Someone cooked dinner over a smokeless magical fire, turning the soup with a big ladle. The room filled with the scent of simmering potatoes and aromatic tomato.
A shadow fell over him. He looked up. Arun smiled down at him, fixing her ponytail. Her cat ears twitched, a remnant of her mother’s ancestry. “Did you finish securing the south exit?”
Jon turned. Several tunnels fed into this room, some from such heights that no one had bothered to secure them. As for the rest… he looked at the southward tunnel, where he’d piled rocks and boulders along with the other cultists. They’d remove them in the morning, but until then, the scraping of stone-on-stone would warn them of any human arrivals, and the rock blockage would do enough to hold off any monsters.
He gestured. “Look for yourself.”
She turned, then sighed. “You know it’s all a grey blur to me.”
Jon raised his brows. “Your eyes are still bad?”
“Of course they are! We’re on the first floor. I’ve killed seven worms. What do you think I am, an otherworlder who can get some Far Sight skill after two kills? I need to accumulate lots more mana if I’m going to enhance my senses,” she chided him gently.
He smiled. “What, you haven’t awakened a System already?”
She rolled her eyes playfully. “Only idiots like Sean seriously believe we might unlock a System if we ‘defeat the dungeon,’ whatever that means. No one’s even seen the bottom of the dungeon, so good luck getting there.”
“Speaking of Sean, where’d he go?”
Arun waved her hand. “Who knows? He said something about killing the non-believers, or whatever. And good riddance, honestly.”
“To who, them, or Sean?”
She laughed. “Either of them! Sean, because he’s an asshole, and the interlopers because fuck ‘em. They don’t deserve our dungeon. Who’s been protecting it all these years, huh? Even if the Cult doesn’t care, I’m not going to be happy if some outsiders come in and take all our loot. They offer nothing and steal what’s rightfully ours, attack our families, hell, some of them eat our children, do you know that? And they call us the Death Cult! Fucking outsiders. They all deserve to die. If Sean kills them all, I might actually thank him.”
“I’ll toast to that,” Jon said, raising an imaginary glass.
Arun raised hers back.
Something dripped from their imaginary glasses. Both of them startled. They exchanged a look, then, slowly, looked up.
From a tunnel directly overhead, a skull gazed down at them. Brown sludge surrounded the bone, obscuring it, but not hiding it.
“What,” Jon said, unable to manage any more.
A man’s face appeared, one of those very interlopers they’d been talking about. He tossed them a jaunty wave and a grin. “Sorry about that. The slombie’s hungry.”
Jon’s brows furrowed deeper. Arun jolted back in alarm. She opened her mouth to scream.
“Whoopsie. I guess that spoiled the surprise. Slombie, I choose you!”
A slime-coated skeleton dropped into the center of the large cavern with a splatter. Two other bloody figures landed on either side of it. One loomed tall, gripping a greataxe in both meaty, green hands, while the other clutched a sword, short and slender. At the sight of the cultists, their eyes suddenly glowed green. Black and green energy swirled around them. Their muscles bulged.
The whole camp stared. A few people stood up in the distance, reaching for their weapons.
“Ooh, that’s new. I like that,” Levi commented to himself, eyeing the writhing energy. He was using the zombies against the people whom they were most likely to hold a grudge, and it seemed that was working in his favor. Something to remember for later.
He gripped the edge of the hole. At the last second, he glanced back and waved at Isa and Colin. “Can’t leave my audience waiting. You two, be good. Daddy will be back soon, and I swear I’ll have that milk.”
Isa frowned at him, lost. Colin sighed.
Levi leaped down from above. He landed with a heavy thump. Dust flew up all around him. As it cleared, he turned slowly, taking in the room. “Hello, ladies, gentlemen, and otherwise! Are you ready to fuckin’ die?”
The stares intensified. Arun fled. Jon lunged.
Levi drew his sword. The Armalgam’s arms unfolded from under his cloak and drew four additional swords. He gave them a little spin and tossed the room a winning grin. “Because I’m ready to kill.”
Up in the hole, Isa put her hand on her face. Colin sighed heavily, a pained expression on his face.
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“Is he always like this?” Isa asked.
Colin shook his head. “I wish the answer wasn’t ‘yes.’”
Jon reached Levi. Levi didn’t even turn. The Armalgam whirled, and Jon fell down in pieces.
As if they’d been waiting for a cue, all the rest of the cultists jumped up and charged him and his zombies.
Levi snapped his fingers. Each of the zombies rushed off in a different cardinal direction. Levi took the remaining direction. Cultists rushed toward him. Fireballs, rocks, and arrows flew toward him. The Armalgam wrapped its arms around him, tanking the hits.
“Die, fucker!” a man shouted.
“Ooh, I’ve reached ‘em already?” Levi spread the Armalgam’s arms wide, slashing out at the same time. The cultist had enough time to look shocked before two swords sliced through his chest and stomach.
Three other cultists rushed toward him. The Armalgam held off the other two, while he took on the one charging him directly. Their swords clashed. The other man’s muscles bulged, trained over years of practice. Even so, Levi held his blade easily.
“Damn. I already knew it, but the System is a hell of a cheat, isn’t it?” Levi asked him. The Armalgam struck out with both its arms, swaying Levi forward. He used its swing to shove the other man back, then followed it up with a kick to the man’s shins. The man staggered, gritting his teeth against pain. He dashed in and thrust, piercing the man’s chest with his sword. The man gagged on his own blood. Lifting his foot, Levi kicked him off his sword.
The other two fell back as well, but four more rushed in to take the fallen cultists’ places. Levi considered for half a beat as they charged, then shrugged. “Spin to win?”
He held out his swords, all five of them, and spun around on the spot, transforming into a makeshift blender. The cultists slowed. They exchanged a glance, then shrugged collectively.
Levi stopped. He lurched to the side, barely catching himself, a little dizzy-drunk. “I see now that I was foolish.”
The cultists charged.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up, one second,” Levi requested. He staggered leftward, off-balance. “I’ve gotta stabilize here.”
The leftward cultist’s eyes widened. He lunged, stabbing at Levi.
The Armalgam slashed with its two leftward blades, taking the man’s head like a pair of scissors.
“Whaaaaa… I’m getting there, hold on.” Levi stumbled right.
Fire flared. The Armalgam flexed its arms and took the hit. The cultist backstepped, but Levi stumbled faster. A blade flashed out from under the Armalgam and cut the man’s stomach open.
“Oh no! Watch out!” Levi tripped forward.
The cultist smirked. “I’ve been waiting.” The muscular woman drew back a heavy sledgehammer, unleashing a heavy blow at Levi.
He jumped nimbly back, suddenly recovering his balance. “Phew, that was close!”
The woman rolled her eyes at him. “Uh huh.”
“Yeah, okay. It was kind of obvious, wasn’t it?” Levi snapped his fingers. The Armalgam sheathed two swords. It leaped off his back and rushed the man behind him on its two newly opened hands. Freed of its load, Levi sped toward the hammer-wielder. She drew back her hammer, trying to launch another blow, but her hammer was too heavy to move that quickly. He reached her in a blink of an eye and smiled. His sword sunk into her chest.
The woman swung her hammer one last time, but he was too close. It thumped into his side. It bruised him, but it didn’t land a heavy blow.
Levi pushed her away. “Next.”
The cultists rushed at him. He sliced the blood off his sword and charged them in turn. Gold light shone down on him from above as Colin did his part.
Across the battlefield, the zombies fought on. The slombie lurched forward. The cultists hit it with magic, but the blows glanced off the skeleton. Blades struck the skeleton and sunk into the slime, dissolving in the foul feeder’s powerful acid. The cultists backed away one step at a time. It lurched forward, arms out. Screaming, one of the cultists rushed the slombie. It pivoted toward him. The cultist struck out. Its sword burrowed deep in the slombie’s ribcage, severing several ribs. He yanked his sword back and struck again. This time, he severed the slombie’s spine. It slumped forward, falling on him. Its legs hit the ground.
The man panted. Caught his breath. Standing up, he grinned. “Take that—”
The slombie gripped the man’s shoulder. Slime spread from the slombie’s bones and crawled over the man’s body. He screamed and shoved it away. The slime slithered up the man’s arm, undeterred. The man’s arm withered to bone. Up to the shoulder. To the chest. The man screamed louder, but it did nothing to stop his inevitable demise. The slime left its original skeleton behind and covered the man, boiling his flesh away. In a few moments, nothing was left but the skeleton.
Levi jolted. He looked over his shoulder. “Huh. I can feel when they re-die, can I?” Jerking his knife out of a man’s eye, he pointed and snapped his fingers. “Biddly bobbledy boo, a new skeleton for you.”
The slombie’s skeleton jolted. It stood upright. Turning, it continued its slow advance toward the other cultists.
“Rick, no! Rick! Riiiick!” a girl screamed. She launched fireball after fireball at the advancing skeleton, backing up to the wall. The slime flinched inward, letting the fireballs bounce off its bones. It reached out for the girl.
“I don’t envy her.” Levi leaped into the melee again.
The other two zombies battered the cultists away. They accumulated wounds, but in true zombie form, they didn’t react to the pain. Unfeeling, unstoppable killers, they stomped numbly into the crowd, mowing down cultists one after another. Slowly, the numbers overwhelmed them. Mae dropped, then Piri, and only the slombie and Levi remained.
For all that, few cultists remained. Mae and Piri had made a considerable effort against the cultists. Half of those who remained focused their efforts on the slombie, while the other half chased Levi and the Armalgam around the room. Levi fled and rolled, laughing, having the time of his life, and the Armalgam skittered around him, occasionally darting out to sweep someone’s legs so he could finish them off. Despite the overwhelming numbers against them, the fight was clearly leaning in Levi’s direction.
Isa stepped forward. “If I don’t join now, there won’t be anyone left to eat.” She dropped into the room, landing in a perfect stand, as though she’d stepped down a small ledge rather than dropping from the ceiling. She looked left, then right, then vanished. A swirl of bats reappeared behind one of the men. A hand gripped his face, and fangs sunk into his neck. His fellow cultists whirled, charging at Isa, but before their blows could land, she vanished again, reappearing in front of a woman. She struck once more, tearing out the woman’s throat and messily slurping her blood.
From above, Colin watched, shocked. He shook his head, but Isa was still down there, savaging the cultists with her bare teeth. “Aren’t you supposed to be the normal one?”
Isa looked up. Licking a bead of blood off her thumb, she winked at him, then vanished again.
“Yeah, gods. I guess I forgot she’s a vampire.” Shaking his head, he turned his attention back to Levi. Blood flowed freely down Levi’s side, but the man didn’t seem to feel it. He hefted his staff, pushing more mana into the spell.
Colin sighed aloud. “Is it too much to hope I can meet someone normal in this world?”