“Servant! Please bring me the next bottle. Hurry up, don't make your better’s wait!” I smugly smiled as the young boy quickly scurried off to do as he was told. Such was his lot in life. I swirled the wine in my goblet before chugging it down.

Some said you had to take your time with wine to enjoy. But they are wrong. If you could afford large amounts of it why not consume proportional amounts. If you did this you could experience the full flavor of being rich.

I smiled at my own joke. I’m hilarious! I turned to look at the mirror and nodded. My beautiful blond hair, gold eyes and gold crown. Everything combined perfectly to frame my glorious face.

I nodded and stood up, wobbling slightly as the alcohol began to slam into my brain like a pile of gold bricks hitting my treasury. I stood there for a few seconds, balancing myself as I looked around, a tad disoriented.

That was the risk the rich took when they enjoyed fine wine the correct way. I stumbled over to my collection of gold goblets and yelled. “Peasants! Serve me!” I closed my eyes, savoring the feeling of drunkenness. It felt almost like falling after tripping on your own feet. Exhilarating and embarrassing at the same time. It also made your head hurt like it had just slammed into the edge of your brick fireplace.

I opened my eyes but I could only see out of one of them, the other was covered in some viscous liquid. The red liquid began to pool around me and I mumbled “Not my wine.” Then My vision started to go dark. Perhaps I had drunk a bit too much alcohol.

The next moment I opened my eyes and for some reason I still couldn’t see anything. Mine always glowed with the sheer mass of gold within it. Why was I in some peasant room? I reached up and felt my arms slam into something.

I could feel some strange resistance as well whenever I moved. Was I in a bath? Had the servants covered it? I decided that resistance was futile so I went back to sleep. I woke up a few minutes later still in complete darkness.

I was bored by now so I started thrashing around, slapping the walls and recoiling at the pain. Why did someone like me have to feel pain! I pushed through the hellish torture as I slapped my hands into the wall over and over again. Also what was weighing me down.

Finally I slammed my face into the wall and noticed my mouth hit the wall far sooner than it should have. Maybe my face was swollen from the suffering I had been through. After a few more times face butting the wall it finally cracked.

Actually wait why did it crack, how weak was this wall? Why the hell am I in a covered bath? Where are my thrice dampened servants. This is unacceptable! My father will be hearing of this.

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I huffed and decided to continue breaking out of the weak bath. No reason to stay there. Wait, how did I not drown? There was definitely liquid surrounding my face. Maybe I was just too rich to die? Interesting thought but no reason to test it.

I finally fully smashed my head through and was able to see my surroundings. Unlike the expected luxury bathroom I instead looked around at a large pond surrounded by mud. I quickly went back inside my bath and curled into a ball.

That was unsuccessful as when I tried to curl up something curled around my entire body. I jumped out of the bath and landed on my back in the mud. Which allowed me to look up and see a giant rat sniffing at my bath that looked suspiciously like an egg.

The rat that was easily the size of my house noticed me and let out a screech as it bounded towards me. I let out a screech as well which was a bit less intimidating but still effective at scaring myself. 

I flipped over and sprinted away on all fours, moving surprisingly fast. I dived into the mud and began to dig, quickly hiding in my small hole. I covered myself in mud and sat there. What the fuck is going on?

Why am I covered in mud? Why is a giant rat trying to kill me, why do I have webbed feet and a tail for shit’s sake! Why is my mouth more of a giant jaw than my perfect fucking human jaw.

The rat dug into the mud so I dug deeper, going as far as I could. After a few minutes of digging I hit what could only be described as not mud. I couldn’t dig any farther but the rat was picking up speed as it chortled in delight.

I looked up and screamed. “It's not my fault you're poor! Leave me alone and go beg some baker for bread! I only eat steak and sushi!” It continued digging and I was a tad fed up. The second one of its fingers got near me I bit it.

“Take that you destitute commoner!” The rat didn’t even react so I bit it again. This continued until I was plainly revealed to the rat. Its towering form stared down at me as its tongue lolled out.

I glared at it and screamed. “You impoverished turd! Leave me alone!” The rat continued staring at me, not moving an inch. The damn thing was playing with me. Well two could play this game. “I may be some strange lizard now but I am still your goddamn better. Die for my benefit!”

I leapt at the vermin and face planted onto its toes. I didn’t actually know how to jump with the tail dragging me down. So I just kept biting his toes. It was disgusting but as a noble I could do whatever I wanted.

I began slowly scaling the beast as it continued to do nothing but glare at me. “Ha! Your arrogance will be your doom! Nothing is better than me!” The rat still seemed stuck in place so after a few minutes of climbing I made it to the rat's throat. I began repeatedly biting it, tearing off small pieces of skin until finally the blood began to flow like wine.

I smiled and quickly realized my mistake as the rat collapsed and caused me to fall as well. I landed in the mud but thankfully I seemed alright.

You have killed a level 2 Giant Rat

You have leveled up. You are now a level 1 mud skink.

I frowned, how could I level up? I was already the best. Even if I was some weird mud lizard now. Being rich carries over, obviously. I stared at the now corpse of the rat. Was this my new life? Fighting vermin and animals just to survive to the next day?

No, I am wealthy! No one can confine me to their social structure unless I am at the very top. Look out world! I am going to prove to you that I am better! Because I am! It is my birthright and nothing will stop me from seizing it. Especially not poor people! I shall rule the world! Money!