*I should have known better.*

“Are you out of your mind, Abbigail Gardener!?” my mum shouted. “Of all the ridiculous things you could waste our time, you chose that!?”

Despite the heating, the living room suddenly felt like a freezer. All of my previous hopes were now wrecked on the floor. Even so, I still wanted to fight.

“I-it’s not ridiculous! It’s what I—”

“Shut up, missy! I haven’t finished yet,” she argued back. “Do you think I’ll let you throw away all the hard work, all the effort I put into raising you?”

“You’ve never asked me if that was anything I wanted! You always expected me to play along like a good girl!”

“How dare you talk back?! Is this because of that girl’s influence?”

“Her name is Violet, mum! Violet Evergreen! And no! She did nothing wrong, so don’t you dare bring her into this discussion!”

“Why, you! I ought to—”

“That’s enough, Elisa!” my dad shouted as he hit the coffee table with his fist when he saw mum raise her hand, making me flinch in fear.

The room fell dead quiet. Mum and I, who at that point had anger all over our faces now expressed indignation and a deep fear, respectively. Dad was now who was steaming.

“Excuse me!?” mum began.

“You heard me! I’m sick and tired of this crap. I watched in silence as you belittled our daughters and treated them like you would incompetent employees.”

“I do no such thing!”

“Oh, really? If that’s the case, when was it the last time you said something nice to any of the two, huh? Can you remember?”

“I’m their mother!” my mum said red with anger.

“Let me tell you that you suck at that!”

“Oh? Are you now telling me you are a better parent than me? Is that it?”

“It’s because I’ve been a terrible father that I’m digging my heels now. Enough is enough!”

Once again, the room fell silent. I was petrified in my seat while my parents stared at each other with pure spite. It felt like the time had stopped, but the clicking I could hear from the grandpa clock told me it was just ticking away slowly.

“I suppose you are going to tell me next you want the divorce,” mum said bitterly.

He looked at me, his face grievous with regret. It got even worse when he saw my tears, which felt like acid as they burned my face where they streamed.

“Yes,” he said as he came back to facing mum. “I think that would be for the best of us all.”

“You will be hearing from our lawyer,” mum said as she stormed out of the room.

“Abby, sweety…?” dad spoke worryingly as he faced me again.

My crying became even worse, my breathing—which I came to realize, had stopped in the middle of the argument—resumed in an almost asthmatic way. I tried to form words, but I was only able to choke on them as my breathing became even more erratic. Dad was now looking at me with a mix of worry and terror as he held my shoulders and tried to calm me down with words, I could barely hear over the ringing in my ears.

“M-m-my…ult…m-m-m… f-f-fa…”

“No, sweety! No! It’s not your fault. It’s ours,” said dad as he now was also crying. “I’m sorry Abby. I’m so sorry! It’s your mother’s and mine. I’m so sorry.”

◊◊◊

I looked at my cellphone for what felt like the hundredth time today. One more day had passed, and I still hadn’t been able to talk with Abby on the phone. Tomorrow would be the New Year and would also mark the second week I hadn’t heard from her.

“Had I done something wrong?” and “did something happen to her?” were thoughts that assaulted me every waking hour. Sometimes, something even worse came to mind.

“Still no news from her?” dad asked as he placed a hand on my shoulder.

“Yeah… She isn’t picking up,” I said, feeling disheartened.

“And were things alright the last time you two were toge—”

“Yes, dad! We had a great time,” I told him exasperated. “I just… What if something happened to her?”

“Hey, hey, calm down,” he said as he tried to calm me. “For all we know she travelled somewhere for the holidays and forgot her phone.”

“But didn’t you tell me her parents are still going to work?”

“Maybe she is with other relatives? You said it yourself. She didn’t tell you much about her family.”

I didn’t answer. I just went back into my mind. There was a way I could discover what was going on. That was going to her place. I had struggled with that idea, always coming up with excuses not to go. Either because I could bother her, come face to face with her mother, all of it just excuses so that I didn’t have to admit I was scared of her telling me to go away or discover that something really had happened. Only, this time I was tired of making excuses.

“I’m going to her place!” I told dad as I pushed him out of my room so I could change. I was now going to face my fears.

Standing now in front of the door, my finger hovering above the bell, was when I finally started second guessing myself. That took me longer than I thought, but it still wasn’t something to be proud about. I just had to move my finger just a smidge. Why was that so hard all of a second?

I shook my hand, took a breath and, with all the resolve I had gathered, pressed the button. As soon as I did so, the door opened, and I came face to face with none other than Abby. That was my first impression at least. It was actually her mother. It was just by pure wishful thinking that I saw her. Even though they had some similarities, her mother was about my height, and there was an even bigger, enormous even, difference between the two. Abby’s face always carried warmness in it.

“You,” she spoke, barely moving her mouth, her expression so bitter, I shrivelled under it.

“G-good morning. Is… is Abby home?”

“Have you come to gloat?” she spat, her face twisted.

“W-what? No, I just—”

I bit my tongue as she slapped me across the face with such force, my glasses flew out of my face.

“Just get out of my face!” she shrieked as she shut the door.

Trembling, I picked up my glasses and left crying. Not because of the pain, or the cracks in the lenses, but because I was terrified. Just what had happened?

“Oh my god! What happened?” my father demanded to know as soon as he saw me enter home.

I explained the best I could what had happened. Now that I slightly calmer from being home and with him, I noticed the taste of metal in my mouth and, while I was talking, I noticed my speech was slurred.

He made a face I had never seen him make. It was pure, unadulterated anger. I saw his fists tightening.

“Daddy will be back in a minute. Stay here,” he growled as he went straight to the door.

After half an hour that felt like an eternity, he was back, a dark aura still surrounding him, and he had someone with him that looked exhausted. It was Mr. Gardener. Abby’s father, for some reason came to my house, and his expression made me tear up as I started to fear the worse.

“Hello, Violet. I’m—”

“Is Abby ok?” I interrupted, not caring for politeness at that point.

“Don’t worry she is… well, sit down. I have some explaining to do.”

We sat down and he gave me an account of what had transpired on the day we had gone to visit my mum. I also got to know he and Abby were staying at a hotel until the divorce was settled and he found a place to live. Apparently, Abby would be left in his care as her mother wanted to settle the matter as quickly as possible, afraid of domestic violence charges and so, did not put up a fight for her custody.

“Oh my god. It’s my fault, isn’t it?” I cried.

“No, Violet. It’s mine,” Mr. Gardener said. “For far too long I let Elisa belittle and terrorize Abbigail and her sister. That day was just when I couldn’t stand for it any longer. Had I been a better parent, that would never have happened.”

“B-but—”

“I don’t know the details, but it’s like Mr. Will said. It really isn’t your fault,” my dad added, his voice coarse.

“I’d like to give you more time to process all this, but I need your help Violet,” Mr. Gardener said.

“M-my… help?”

“Yes,” he concurred as he rubbed his eyes. “Abbigail… Abby needs you. She hasn’t spoken a word since, barely eats and doesn’t leave the bed. It’s what worries me the most in all this.”

“Is she in such a bad state?” I asked terrified.

He nodded.

“I know it’s too much to ask, but will you please try and at least get her to eat something?”

It was all too sudden. It was all very scary. Now, I also felt an enormous weight on my shoulders. Even so, I felt no hesitation this time. If I was going to be of any use, I didn’t know. Honestly, I didn’t believe I could.

“I’ll try—”

“That’s all well and good Mr. Will but,” my dad spoke gruffly. “You can clearly see what happened to my daughter’s face and glasses. What about that?”

As they started to discuss it, I touched the left side of my face. It felt like it was on fire and swollen. I decided to use my phone camera as a mirror. It was indeed swollen, and it was already starting to go purple, probably looking worse than it was since my skin was so pale. My lip also had a small gash with dried blood over it all the way down to the chin. Looking down, there was a small pool of dried blood on my clothes from it.

“Did Elisa really hit you like that when you went there to ask about Abbigail?”

“Yes but… I don’t think she knew I wasn’t aware of what is going on.”

“Even so, that’s going too far… By the looks of it, I’d say she punched you instead of giving you a slap.”

“I don’t see how that makes any difference,” my dad interjected.

“Sorry, Stanley. I’m tired so I’m just thinking out loud. I’ll make her pay for the glasses, that I guarantee. Her face on the other hand—”

“I don’t care about my face,” I said impatiently as I stood up. “Just take me to Abby!”

“You mean…right now?” they asked in unison.

“Yes, right now!”

“Don’t you want to take care of—”

“Like I said, I don’t care about it!” I practically yelled. “Even if it leaves a scar, it’s not like I’ll be worse for wear!”

I saw my dad form a protest in his mouth, but almost immediately he closed it under my glare. The two exchanged a look to which my dad nodded.

“I have no words for how thankful I am,” Mr. gardener said solemnly. “Your Violet really is something else.”

I was standing in front of her room, key in the lock. During the trip there, I thought what to say, but nothing that came to mind seemed any good. Were the roles reversed, I believed Abby would know what to do. Or at least she would find out what to do as she went. But that wasn’t how it was going to happen. It was I who had to do the lifting.

Sighing, I walked inside the room.

It was a simple room. A corridor led to the bedchamber and had a door to the right giving access to the bathroom. The bedchamber had an enormous window from which you could see the townscape. In the middle of the right wall was the single bed where I found Abby completely hidden under the covers, just having the tip of her head peeking.

Coming closer to the bed, I could hear a soft breathing. Gently, I sat by her, making it so that, were she to wake up, she wouldn’t see the bruised side of my face. It had brought a lot of attention from people, but hers is the one I didn’t want to attract. I was scared it would only worsen her state. I sat there for some time, looking at that figure all curled up. She didn’t seem to be waking up anytime soon, so I gently gave her a shake as I called out her name.

She shook a bit, uncovered her head, and looked towards the window. She must have seen my reflexion in the glass, as she jumped in the bed to look at me, her face, now extremely pale and sunken, showing a startled expression. I felt like I was hit in the chest with a mallet as I saw that.

“Hello, Abby,” I spoke quietly, as if she was still asleep.

“V-Violet?”

“Yes. It’s me. I’m here.”

She looked at me, perplexed. She was probably coming to terms with me actually being there.

“Why?” she asked, tears forming in her somewhat lifeless eyes.

“I was worried about you. We all are.”

“I’m…I’m sorry…” she said, now starting to cry.

“It’s ok,” I told her as I pulled her head towards my chest, patting her head as I did so.

“Do you…know?”

“Yes. Mr. Gar— Your father told me what happened.”

She started wailing as I said that. She was babbling something incoherently. It took me a while to finally understand what she was trying to say.

“It’s my fault, isn’t it?”

I pulled her away from me and did to her what she had done to me when it was I who was babbling. I gently held her face in my hands and looked as straight into her eyes as I could.

“If that is so, then I’m the one who is the guiltiest.”

She didn’t utter a word. She just kept opening and closing her mouth, clearly wanting to ask why I was saying that.

“If I had kept to myself the idea of you becoming a teacher you wouldn’t have had that argument, right? So, I’m the one who is guilty of it all.”

“H-how can you say that!?” she yelled from the top of her lungs. “Why would you think such a thing!?”

“So, don’t you also think you aren’t responsible for your parents break up? Don’t you think they would do it any other time? That it just happened to be that day, and that it could have been any other day for some other reason?”

Her only answer was an expression torn by pain, and her face crashing down on my lap as she went back to wailing, her cries muffled by my legs.

When she was finally done with it, she laid on her side, curling herself, and kept her face rested on my lap. She was still very emotional, but I could see she had calmed down. I had a strong suspicion she had kept all those emotions piled up inside and now that they all exploded, she could finally start processing everything which was happening around her.

“You’re right,” she said in a somewhat hollow voice.

“Feeling better?”

“…I don’t know…I feel numb.”

“It’s ok. Let’s take baby steps.”

“Hmm.”

Seeing her so docile right now gave me an ok signal to press on to other subject matters.

“Is it true you haven’t been eating?”

“…I’m sorry… I haven’t been hungry…” she meekly spoke.

“Nope, that won’t do,” I told her as I started to force her to stand. “Come on! Off to the shower with you.”

“What?! Why? Just leave me alone!” she protested as I pushed her towards the bathroom.

“Didn’t you say you like my cooking? I refuse to have you at my table reeking.”

“But I told you I—”

“Abby!” I cut her. “I’ve been worried sick about you for days. Won’t you please come to my place and try to eat a little? I’ll do anything you want so, please? For me?”

She hung her head. Was she going to throw a fit or start wailing all over again?

“Could you… could you make… meat stew?”

I gave her a little giggle to which she lifted her head.

“The one you said it tasted homey? Sure thing.”

“…Thanks.”

“No problem. Now please, go take a shower. I’ll prepare you a change of clothes.”

“Ok,” she said with a nod, setting her hands free from mine and started shambling to the bathroom.

I was going through the drawers when I heard her calling for me.

Lifting my eyes, I saw her leaning her head out of the door.

“What happened to your face?” she asked, her voice now sounding worried instead of weak and hollow.

“I’ll tell you about it another time. Just hurry up and get ready.”

“Ok,” she said. I’m not forgetting that she added as she went back inside.

Well, duh.

It wasn’t as if it was something anyone would forget when it could be so clearly seen.

While Abby was showering and getting dressed, I called dad so he and Mr. Gardener would be informed of the current situation. I also asked dad to invite Mr. Gardener for dinner. After having seen him so mad today, I was a bit fearful of his reaction but, surprisingly enough, he offered no resistance.

“All set?” I asked Abby when she came into the bedroom, now washed and clothed.

“Yeah,” she spoke in a bit of a monotone.

“Ok, let’s go,” I said as I grabbed her hand, intending to give her support. She instead pulled her hand away and clinged herself to that arm. I looked at her a bit surprised, but she just gave me a begging look.

Well, whatever.

Don’t get me wrong, I was fine with that kind of behaviour when in private. In private. When we were in public however, and we were soon going to be, it was too much for me that kind of stuff. To make things worse, people would be seeing a teary-eyed girl clinging to another with a bruised face and bloodied clothes. The fact two adults accompanied us… I’m not sure if it helped or not, but I don’t care how you want to paint it, it didn’t look good. But even after taking all of that in consideration, at that moment I didn’t care for any of it. I just wanted to make Abby feel better and make her have a good meal.

We had to make a quick stop to buy some meat, since we didn’t really have time to let what we had to defrost. Now that the four of us were at my house, I was to go to the kitchen. There was just one problem I had to solve first.

“Sorry, but I need you to leave my arm,” I spoke softly to Abby.

She gave me one of her looks, but seeing me not budging under it, she released it.

“Why don’t you go play something with our parents in the meantime? I think your father would be happy with that.”

She exchanged a look with her father, who was unaware of our conversation, before giving me a nod in agreement and walking over them.

Now, stew isn’t a particularly complicated thing to prepare and cook, even when you want it to be tasty. Even so, I must confess. This time I put a lot more care than I usually did without noticing it. The only reason why I realised that was the fact it took me almost double of the time it usually takes me to get to the step of just letting it simmer.

“How are things?” my dad asked as I sat with them at the table. He was now more like his usual self despite looking very tired.

“We just have to wait for it to simmer and we can eat,” I answered, also feeling a bit tired myself.

“Sorry,” said Abby meekly. “I should have helped…”

“No way!” I told her as cheerful as I could without sounding forced. “That kitchen barely has enough space for my dad to work in there, let alone you and me.”

Even with that said, she looked a bit gloomier.

What a pain.

“If you want to help me that much, can I count on you to help me do the dishes?”

“I’ll do it,” she said sounding a bit more enthusiastic. That made me think that, instead of just trying to treat her with all the care in the world, I should act in a way more like our normal. That would certainly make things easier for me.

“So,” I spoke to all of them. “Who’s winning?”

“They are!” my dad proclaimed, not too bothered. “Mr. Will is first, Abby with half of his score and me at last.”

“I told you to drop the ‘Mister’” Abby’s dad spoke.

“I know, sorry. It’s just a bit weird calling my boss so casually,” my dad said apologetically.

“In that case, call me ‘Mister’ only when we are at the office. Otherwise, it’s just Will for you. And that goes for you too Violet.”

“Huh? Oh, erm… ok,” I stumbled. It felt weird to call someone who was more than twice my age just by their name, but it really wasn’t something I could argue.

After that point, I zoned out of the conversation. I had a set of eyes transfixed on me across the table. Probably because of my bruises. I felt like picking up my chair and go sit by her side, but I had to get up and serve the stew in a bit, so it wouldn’t be worth it.

Maybe I should ask if she could stay over?

She certainly seemed like she would want to, but judging by our conversation about her wanting to help me cook, that would be something she would be troubled asking.

Guess I’ll wait and see.

Dinner went mostly quiet. Looking around the table, I could see everyone showed different levels of tiredness. Mr. Gardener looked—quite frankly—like a dead man, my father also looked like someone needing to lay down, and Abby… well, she wasn’t like her dad, but…

The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

“This is good,” she said when she noticed me looking at her.

I gave her a smile. Seeing her eat with some semblance of an appetite gave me relief for the first time today. If she was eating like that, she would be alright, right?

“Violet?” Abby called nervously.

“Yes, Abby?”

“…Erm… never mind,” she said after glancing to our dads. It was that wasn’t it?

“Mr. Gard… no, that’s not it. Erm… William,” I compromised. Just calling him Will was a bit too much. “Could Abby stay over? In fact, you should too.”

“Abby? Sure. But I—”

“You stay too,” my dad cut him off. “I mean, I just want to get myself some sleep. I can’t even imagine how tired you must be.”

“Won’t I be a bother?” Abby’s dad asked.

“None at all. We just have to take out the spare mattress for that.”

“Oh, the sofa is fine. I’m quite used to it.”

Having said that, he gave a nervous look at Abby.

By the way she looked back, she hadn’t heard him. I wasn’t dumb enough not to understand what was behind his words and reaction.

After the dishes and giving our goodnights, the two of us went to my room. Since no one had planned Abby staying over, I lent her one of my PJ’s. The ones I wore during the winter were all more on the baggy side, so it was no problem finding one that fit her. Come to think of it, if it were any other season, it still wouldn’t have been a problem by our experience.

Anyway, we were now in bed, me on the wall side, belly up and Abby on the other side, curled with her back towards me. I found myself thinking she might want to cuddle but was too reluctant to ask as she usually did, so I’d have to be the one to take the first step. The question was how? I had an idea and with that, I touched my face.

Yep, cold enough.

I scooted over to her and placed one of my hands under her arm pit.

“Eek! Violet!?” she squeaked.

“Sorry. I was just feeling cold. Should I take it off?”

“No, it’s fine. I was just caught off guard.”

I couldn’t see her face, but I’d like to believe she was with a tiny smile as she said that.

“Hey, Violet…”

“Yes, Abby?”

“…Actually, let’s not,” she said, shaking her head slightly.

“No, please. Tell me,” I said curious.

“I’ll tell you some other time,” she said gradually quieter. “I still have to think a bit more.”

“Oh…ok,” I said a bit disappointed for not getting my curiosity satisfied.

She took my hand off from under her arm to turn herself towards me and getting my hand back in her armpit and grabbing the other and placing it under her head, even though that hand was warm. She proceeded to gently caress my face and lower lip. Normally I’d turn violently red, but this time I just gave a tiny wince as that part of my face was where I was hit.

“It looks so painful,” she murmured.

“I-it’s not so bad,” I said, trying to hide the pain I felt, to no avail.

“Are you going to tell me what happened now?”

“Now is not the—”

“Please, Violet. Tell me,” she said, now sounding worried. “If it was… if it was your dad…”

“No, no, no!” I said hurriedly. “It wasn’t him who did this.”

“Then who?” she demanded.

“…It was… your mother.”

“…Mum did this?” she asked incredulous.

“Yes… I went to your place this afternoon looking for you. That’s when it happened.”

She stared at me for a while, as if processing what I had told her. Gently, she pulled my head to her chest as she came to rest her chin on the top of it.

“I’m sorry, Violet. I should have told you.”

It was now I who was also getting emotional. I grabbed her shirt as my eyes flooded with tears and a sensation of having something choking me came about.

“Why?” I asked in tears. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I’m so sorry, Violet,” she said crying too. “I wanted to. I wanted to call you so much. But… I just couldn’t. I don’t know why… I just…”

“Aren’t we friends?” I practically yelled. “Isn’t that what friends are for? Aren’t we?”

“Maybe that’s why! I didn’t want you to—”

“I was worried sick! At times I thought… I even thought… you… like mum…”

“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…” Abby babbled.

We laid there, hanging to each other as we cried our eyes out. When we finally calmed down, I was feeling completely exhausted by it all. Now that we were quiet, I realised I somewhat missed being like this with her. Was I all right in the head?

“Violet?” Abby called, softly.

“Yes, Abby?” I answered back in the same tone.

“Sorry, you were so quiet I thought you were sleeping.”

I was going to say something, but instead I started to pay attention to the sounds coming from outside. I could distinctively hear people cheering and loud pops. Only after hearing that did I remember it was the beginning of the new year. I lifted my head towards the window. It was glowing alternatingly between red, blue, green, and yellow. I could also feel the cold air of my room stinging the side of my face that wasn’t resting on the pillow anymore.

“Wanna go check it?” Abby asked, her eyes on the window too.

“Nah,” I said as I put my head back down. “It’s too cold outside of the blankets.”

“Hehe. Because I’m warm, right?”

I lifted my head coming to face Abby’s.

“W-what?” she asked a bit flustered.

“It’s just… I wasn’t expecting to hear you laugh today.”

“Sorry… I made you go through a lot, haven’t I?”

“Yes, but please, let’s not go there again for today. I just got you in a better mood.”

“Ok, but…there is just one thing I want to tell you,” she said in a serious tone.

“Ok… what is it?” I said a bit nervous.

“I want to promise you that next time I’m hurting about something, I’ll share it with you.”

“Oh…Ok, thanks. Please do,” I answered a bit flustered.

“Will you do the same?”

“Huh? Well, yeah…sure. I promise you that too.”

“Hehe. Thanks Violet. Oh, right! Happy New Year, Miss Evergreen,” she said sounding almost as cheerful as usual.

“Happy New Year, Abby,” I said smiling. If she was able to see it, I don’t know.

“So, what are your New Year resolutions?”

“Resolutions? Hmm. Can’t say I have any. For me, each year is always the same as before so…I never bothered with it. How about you?”

“Hmm, let’s see… I want to get closer with Violet, I want to have lots more sleepovers with Violet, travel somewhere with Violet, go to the pool with Violet, see Violet in a swimsuit, get Violet to—”

“Why do they all involve me?!”

“Why? Because I have the most fun with you!”

“Figures.”

“Are you blushing?”

“…No, I’m not.”

“In that case, can you turn on the light?”

“Why?”

“Please, just do it.”

“…Well, ok,” I answered bashfully.

I flipped the switch and squinted my eyes as the light hit me. Abby didn’t seem too bothered by it, as she just stared at my face. Despite it looking sunken, her smile and eyes were mostly back to their usual warm, kind state. I couldn’t help but smile back at her as seeing life again in her gave me a warm feeling in the stomach.

“Ok, you can turn it off now, if you want.”

“So, what was this about?” I asked as I flipped the switch.

“I just wanted to see that face clearly before going to sleep.”

“Why?!” I asked as I hit it under the sheet.

“Why? Because it’s beautiful and I really like it!” she said, her voice trembling slightly.

“But why? There is nothing special about—”

“Let me ask you something. Do you think your mother was pretty?”

“Well, yeah. Of course, I do! She really was a beauty.”

“And are you aware you look just like her?”

“Well… yeah, but…”

“So why do you insist on the fact you are plain when you clearly aren’t?”

She had me there. I truly believed my mother was beautiful. And even I couldn’t deny we were very similar aspect wise by the few pictures I saw of her. So why was I so pessimistic about it? Nobody ever called me ugly, or at least I couldn’t remember anyone doing such a thing. In fact, because I was calling myself plain, wasn’t I by proxy saying my mother was plain? I felt so bad for being so disrespectful towards her. I mean, sure, I wasn’t the most beautiful person in the world, but not recognising I had some beauty of my own was doing a disservice to mum, wasn’t it?

“You’re right,” I said to her as I came out of the covers. “I’ll tell mum I’m sorry for all of this.”

“Well… as long as you understand,” she said, clearly not knowing what else to say to that. “Now, can we go back to cuddling?”

“Can we leave that for tomorrow?” I whined. “I’m too embarrassed right now.”

“Didn’t we do it in the nude before?”

“We were just bare from the waist up that time,” I scolded. “And bringing that up isn’t helping!”

“Come on dear Violet. Don’t you want to make up for the lost time?”

I chewed on those words. I would never admit it, but I would also be lying if I said I didn’t want that. But it was just as I had said. Right now, I was too embarrassed to have her so close to me. I mean, close-er. Anyway, I thought the only option I had was to compromise.

“Can you give me a minute?”

“Yay!” she cheered quietly.

When the morning came, I felt like I hadn’t had a wink of sleep. Don’t get me wrong, I liked a lot our time together during sleepovers, but due to our conversations before we fell asleep, I was getting some really…weird dreams with Abby. Well, our conversations and puberty. I’m eighty percent sure it was puberty the main reason. Anyway, I woke up feeling pretty warm. When I realised that, not only we had cuddled the whole night again, but also that I had now half of my body resting on top of Abby’s… that made me sit up very awake, patting myself all over to make sure I still had my clothes on. Yup, all pieces were still there this time. I squinted at the clock, but my poor, drowsy eyesight couldn’t determine at that distance if it was five-thirty, six-thirty, or eight-thirty of the morning.

Abby sat up as well, probably jolted awake by me, and looked at the clock before looking at me. She proceeded to gently grab my head from the back and giving me a smooch on the forehead.

“W-w-what was that for?” I jumbled as a question.

“As a… thank you for everything?” she said, not seeming too sure on her answer.

“C-c-couldn’t you simply have said it?”

“You’re right. Thank you.”

“Erm… you’re welcome.”

“…Nope, this feels more genuine,” she said as she proceeded to do the same before dragging my body down to bed.

“Abby?! What do you think you’re doing!?” I scolded her.

“Relax, I’ll keep that for special occasions,” she said appearing not too bothered by my squirming and protests. “And also, It’s five-thirty in the morning. Let’s just cuddle and sleep.”

“No Abby! Let me go! I think I need to use the bathroom!” I pleaded.

“You think?” she asked jokingly.

“I need to! I definitely need to!” I argued back.

“Well, ok,” she said as she let go of me and I vaulted over her. “But I’ll be waiting for my cuddles.”

“Yeah, yeah. Just calm down a bit or I’ll get mad at you!”

When I told her, I needed to use the bathroom, I was lying. Even so, now that I was there, I took a good look into my reflexion. Seeing clearly now the purple circle on the left side and that burst lip made me feel…sad. After what Abby had told me yesterday—or rather, today, I now felt like the precious face mum gave me was damaged.

Not wanting to dwell more on that, I washed my face and left the bathroom. In the corridor, close to my room, was Abby’s father.

“Good morning, Mr. Gardener,” I whispered, having forgotten about the whole thing about calling him by the first name.

“Morning Violet,” he whispered back. “How is she?”

“She seems to be feeling better.”

“I see, I see. Again, thank you so much for your help.”

“No, no, it was nothing.”

“No, it really was. Erm… Can I just have a word with you?”

“Sure Mr. Gard— William.”

“Well, erm… I don’t really know how to put it…Erm… I… I still find it weird but… erm… thanks for making my daughter happy…”

“…Erm…thank…you?” I said completely unable to understand why he worded his gratitude towards me being friends with Abby in such a weird way. It was also really weird seeing someone his age acting so flustered.

“Also…erm… the walls are thin, so…” he added.

“Oh, sorry! I’ll tell Abby to quiet down,” I said as I covered my mouth with a hand.

“Don’t worry. Well… I’ll excuse myself,” he said as he turned around and went back to the living room couch. I don’t think he slept that much, but I thought he looked a bit better than the previous day.

“Violet? Who were you talking to?” Abby asked.

She was peeking from the slip she had opened.

“I was talking with your father,” I explained as I went inside. “It seems like we woke him up.”

“Oh. Was he mad?”

“Mad? No… he was… grateful.”

“Grateful? For waking him up?” Abby asked, not hiding her confusion.

“No, for me being your friend.”

“Best friend,” Abby corrected as she let me get in bed first. “Still, is that reason enough for you to be like that?”

“No, he just did it in a weird way,” I told her as I curled myself towards the wall.

“Weird? How so?”

“He was all flustered and— Wait!” I practically shouted. “We are doing it like this?”

I was so distracted with talking about that conversation and making sense of it, I hadn’t realised she had spooned me in the meantime. She was even holding my hand close to my chest.

“Shh! Not so loud!” she whispered harshly.

I covered my mouth in response to that.

She squeezed me tighter, and I felt her leaning her forehead on my nape.

“Abby?” I called.

“It’s nothing,” she muttered. “Let’s just go back to sleep.”

“Hmm,” I was feeling cold when I got into bed and she was very warm and sounded satisfied, so I decided to leave it at that. Although, it still felt a little bit weird.

◊◊◊

A ringing sound made itself heard sometime later. That wasn’t what woke me up though. It was Violet pushing me to the side, rolling over, her body on top of me with her nose almost touching mine, and rolling over again to get out of bed. She turned off the alarm clock and looked to me still half awake. I on the other hand had gotten very awake by what she had done.

“Sorry. Did that wake you?” she asked a bit dazed.

“Y-yeah. What time is it?”

My voice was cracking a bit.

“Time for me to start getting ready to go to work,” she said as she hunched a bit, hands rubbing her arms, as she went to her closet. “I have to prepare breakfast, take a bath, and catch the bus. You can stay there if you want. I’ll leave you something you can eat any time.”

“You aren’t going to work! Not like that!” I told her off.

“Wha— why?” she asked confused before realising what I meant. Oh, right she added as she placed a hand on her cheek. She started to look sad, which prompted me to get up and go to her. The room was colder than I thought it would.

“Why don’t you call them and explain you can’t go for a few days?” I suggested.

“But… they already let me stay home for Christmas and New Year’s dinner…” she said sorrowfully.

“Come on Violet! Don’t feel down because of that. It’s not your fault that happened,” I said consolingly.

“Well… yeah but—”

“No buts,” I interrupted her.

I grabbed her phone and placed it in one of her hands while grabbing the other.

“Just be frank with them. I mean, even if you were to appear there, they would probably send you back, right?”

“Yeah, you’re right. Thanks,” she said with a small smile.

I stood by her side, holding her hand despite her meek attempts at setting it free. She probably thought I was distracting her, but since she was sounding nervous from the beginning, I doubt the person she was talking to paid it any mind. It took a while for her to finish the call because she said sorry a lot of times.

“So, what are we—”

My words were interrupted by a knock on the door. Violet opened her mouth, only to close it and giving me a look from head to toe. Knowing what she was worried about I gave her an ‘are you serious?’ look to which she gave a ‘sorry’ look of her own. With that… non-conversation out of the way, she finally answered back the knock.

“Come in.”

“Sorry to barge in, I just wanted to tell you girls something before I go,” her dad told us as he came in.

“Go? Go where?” Violet asked.

“Apparently there is going to be a meeting between Abby’s parents and their lawyers, and he asked me to go with him,” he explained before adding info he knew was going to be asked as Violet was already opening her mouth. “Probably because of yesterday. He asked for you to come too, but I thought you’d rather stay here and keep Abby company.”

“Yeah… thanks dad,” she said in a sad tone.

“How are you feeling Abby?” he asked.

In the past few hours, I’ve been distracted with Violet, so I hadn’t given it much thought. Now that I had to give an answer, how was I feeling?

Truth be told, I’d rather have my parents together, but looking back, there were plenty of signs things weren’t well between the two. So, was this for the best? I’d have to say, yes. I still felt sad for all that, but if they were to stay together, they would end up tearing each other apart. I would start living with just dad, so I wouldn’t have my mum controlling and terrorising me all the time, and I was still very mad about her hurting Violet, but… she was still my mother. Would I still be able to see her? Would she want to? Would I? I didn’t think I could forgive her yet or ever, but…

Something gently squeezed my hand. She was looking at me with a warm but worried expression as she gently held me.

“I just have to come to terms, right? Don’t worry, I’ll eventually be fine… even if now I don’t feel like it will,” I said as firmly as I could.

“Well, you certainly look better than yesterday,” Mr. Stan tried as a joke.

“Sorry for all that,” I said apologetically.

“You don’t have to,” he said.

He was waving his hands in front of me while looking at Violet. She was probably giving him one of her angered looks.

“Just, erm… give your father a hug when he gets back, ok?”

“Yeah… I will,” I said sounding a bit sad, although I really wasn’t at that point.

“Dad, shouldn’t you be going?” Violet said, a bit annoyed.

“Right, yes. I’ll see you later,” he said as he left the room.

“With that out of the way, what am I to do for breakfast?”

“Oh, anything is fine,” I told her honestly.

“Yeah, no. I can’t work with that.”

“What is it that you usually eat?”

“Me? Two pieces of toast and tea.”

“That’s great! That will do just fine,” I said enthusiastically.

“Come on Abby,” she said annoyed. “I’ve seen you eat plenty of times. There is no way that is enough for you.”

“How rude!”

I said that in fake anger. Well, mostly fake.

“I’ll let you know, dear Violet, I don’t eat much in the morning because of my habit of running early.”

“Okay, okay. I’m sorry. Two pieces of toast it is.”

“Yay!” I proclaimed. “Also, just to be clear, I wasn’t really mad.”

“I know,” she said sighing. “You are just being a bit too energic for me.”

“You really aren’t a morning person, huh?”

“Yeah, yeah. As if you didn’t already know.”

We ate breakfast quietly. I made the choice of letting Violet fully wake up before annoying her more. By the time we were doing the dishes—which were only two, but I begged to help anyway—she seemed to be practically awake. Just to be clear, I wanted to help because I didn’t want to leave her do all the work while I just watched. Anyway, seeing her more awake was the signal for me to go back to messing with her.

“I’m calling dibs on the first hug!” I proclaimed.

“Huh? Where did that come from?” she asked confused.

“Aren’t you going to shower now?”

“I thought about it, but now it’s too cold.”

“Aww. I like how you smell when you shower,” I whined.

“Sorry to disappoint, but you will just have to wait for another time,” she said in a very matter of fact.

“Even if I give you my puppy eyes?”

“Yep. Even with your puppy eyes.”

“Tsk, meanie.”

She didn’t comment back. She just went back to scrubbing the silverware before handing me them for drying and storing.

“Wait! Do I smell?” she asked alarmed.

“Don’t know. Let me check,” I told her as I saw an opening to tease her more.

That was my intention, but somehow, when I realised it, I had my arms around her waist as I pressed myself against her back.

“Abby, stop! Your hands are freezing!” she yelled.

“Ah! Sorry!” I too yelled.

I let her go as I realised what I was doing.

She just gave me an irritated look.

This isn’t good.

Thinking quicky, I found something that could work.

“Are you done with your part of the dishes?”

“Yes,” she said a bit coldly.

“In that case,” I said as I grabbed her hands and shoved them directly on the sides of my belly.

They were cold enough to make me shrivel a bit. Even my hands felt warm compared to hers.

“How about this as a punishment?”

“…You didn’t have to put them under your shirt. A simple sorry was enough…” she said in a more mellow tone.

“How am I supposed to warm them up otherwise?” I offered as an explanation, even though I hadn’t thought that deeply.

“I’m fine now. You can let go,” she said.

She gave her hands a slight tug, but I resisted.

“No way. Only when I feel they are warm,” I said, starting to rub my thumbs on the back of her hands. I must confess, I was starting to enjoy it despite her hands feeling like ice. They were a bit rough, most likely due to the cleaning products she handled on a daily basis, but they had a softness too. I’d have taken more enjoyment out was it not for the sad face she was now putting.

“What is it now?” I asked.

“You are so thin now,” she said feebly as she gently pinched my sides with scissoring movements from her fingers.

It wasn’t out of jealousy she said that. I had looked at myself in the mirror yesterday after the shower and saw how thin I was. Some girls would be jealous if they saw me, but I hated how flimsy I now looked compared to before. Not that I was ever fat or chubby. I always had the right weight for my build.

“Don’t worry. I won’t be neglecting my meals anymore,” I told her softly. “I’ll be like I was in no time. You’ll see.”

She gave me a nod. Even so, her face remained the same.

Not enough, huh?

“Hehe. Remember that day I gave you the dress? I kinda feel stupid for having said I wanted to be slimmer.”

“Yeah. I told you, if anyone had to say she wanted to have the same weight, it should be me,” she said with a nostalgic look.

“Oh, just to be clear, you aren’t too thin, ok?” I said hurriedly, fearing another drop in her mood.

“I know,” she said with a nod. “Or at least I’m starting to think so. I’m trying to have a different outlook of myself.”

“That so? I’m happy to hear that!” I told her with a wide smile.

“I don’t want to put a damper in our conversation but aren’t my hands warm enough for you yet?” she said with a smile of her own.

“Well…ok,” I grumbled as I released her. “But I really didn’t mind staying like that for a bit longer.”

“Yeah, were I to let you do as you please, you’d be permanently attached to me,” she scolded still with a smile. “Anyway, I’m going to take a shower. You can watch a movie I recorded in the meantime.”

“But… you don’t smell,” I argued.

“Yeah, I figured that by your reaction,” she told me bluntly. “Just… sit down. It’ll only take fifteen minutes or so.”

“I want to help!” I toyed.

“You aren’t getting in the shower with me.”

“If that is the case, will there ever be a time we do so?”

“…no!” she said as she turned while flushing. “Just wait for a bit, ok!?”

Feeling satisfied with the results, I went and sat down on the sofa. As I was snickering to myself, I started to reflect on the pause she made in her last answer. I came to believe she did that when she gave some thought to whatever shenanigan had left my mouth. I really liked seeing that red Violet. Were there even red violets? That one certainly was a lot of times. I really missed it for these past two weeks.

I was completely lost in these thoughts when Violet came back.

“You didn’t turn on the tv?” she asked as she sat by me.

“Hmm? Oh, I was waiting to watch it with you.”

I lied. My mind was so full of her that I didn’t notice time going by.

“You really didn’t have to, but thanks,” she said.

She turned the tv on and put the movie on play. Right from the beginning I could tell what kind of movie it was.

“A Christmas movie?” I asked.

“Yeah. I…” she paused while blushing slightly. “I intended to watch it with you if you spent a night here during the holidays.”

“Please stop. My heart can’t take it,” I said half-jokingly.

It was beating like a jackhammer in my chest.

She blushed even more and went quiet.

Sometime later she stood up to sit down halfway from the tv, putting her glasses on a side table and leaning on an armchair. They were now showing a scene in which the family was doing an exchange of presents.

“That would be nice for us to do,” I commented.

“I guess but…I don’t think I’d know what to give you.”

“I’m easy to please! A hug or letting me use your lap for as long as I wanted for the day would be more than enough.”

“Wouldn’t that be a cheap trick?”

“Hmm… I don’t think so. I always have to ask you for that kind of stuff, so you offering and me not having to worry about overstaying would feel pretty great,” I said sincerely.

“…That so?”

“Yep, that so.”

We went back to watching the movie in silence. For about another ten minutes, that is.

“Abby?” Violet called with a trembling voice.

I returned the call, a bit worried by her manners.

She opened her legs slightly and tapped the empty space between them without giving me a look. Not that she had to for me to know what her face was. I could see the tips of her ears through her hair, and they were glowing red. My mind went blank for what felt like an eternity before I could form any semblance of discourse.

“Are you sure about that?” I asked, my voice also trembling slightly.

She nodded.

“I’ll ask dad to cook or order something so you can stay longer.”

“Well… if you say so,” I said as I scooted over her, sitting where she had told me to.

For a while I sat there with my knees close to the chest, facing forward. I was thinking if I should just call it off. That would be a relief for her, right? Or would it actually hurt her feelings? Probably both, right? I’d also be denying me a golden opportunity… no. I had to think of Violet first. What should I do so I wouldn’t hurt her but also not stress her out?

I felt a pair of trembling hands wrap themselves around my belly and pulling me behind. Soon enough I had my head resting on Violet’s chest. Now that we were like that, I could also sense her freshly-out-of-the-shower smell. I couldn’t help but grin from ear to ear with my eyes closed as I regaled in her warmth and perfume. And when I say warmth, I mean her kindness. That girl was cold to the touch. Was she even alive?

When I opened my eyes, they were met with Violet’s.

“Ah! Sorry! It’s just… this feels so nice,” I said as I now went full red.

“It’s okay,” she said softly.

“Is it? I can get out if you want.”

“It’s okay, really,” she said reassuringly. “It doesn’t bother me now.”

“Now? Why?” I asked confused.

“Well…erm… you’re warm and erm… look so…happy…” she staggered as she averted her eyes.

“Hmm. I understand. Thanks, Violet,” I cheered.

“Hmm.”

“Could you just hold me tighter?”

“…Like this?” she asked as she did as I had requested.

“Yep. Just like that,” I said blissfully as I finally let my body completely relax. “Thanks again, Violet. This is the best Christmas present ever.”

“Is it?” she asked coyly as she finally looked back to me.

“Yep, yep. Nothing can beat this,” I proclaimed.

“Thanks…I’m happy to hear that,” she stammered.

“I’ll have to think of something really good if I want to compete with this. Can we do this next time I come over?”

“You don’t have to. And no, we can’t.”

“What if we do this on special occasions?”

“Special occasions? Like what?” she asked confused.

“Hmm… let’s see… Well, Christmas for starters. Oh, how about on our birthdays?”

“…When is your birthday? I don’t think we ever talked about that.”

“Hmm… You are right, we didn’t. It’s always me nagging you or confessing our sins, huh?”

“Yeah… not that I… mind,” she said flustered.

“I think that’s called Stockholm Syndrome,” I joked. “Anyway, mine is on the twelfth of March. You?”

“April fourteenth.”

“Huh!? I’m older than you?”

“…Why don’t you act like it?”

“Hahaha. That sounds boring. Would you like that?”

“Hmm… it would be weird if you did,” she told me with a nod.

“Yay!” I cheered before remembering the first topic of our conversation. “So, do we have a deal?”

“Huh?”

“About us sitting like this on special occasions. Do we?”

“You’re going back to that?” she said as she once again looked away.

“Violet, please look at me,” I implored.

“Nuh-uh. You are just going to ask me again with your puppy eyes.”

“Tsk. I guess you knowing me so well has its disadvantages too,” I grumbled jokingly.

Somehow, after that conversation, we managed to fall asleep. Well, Violet did. I was dozing off when I heard the door click and, looking towards the living room door, I saw our fathers giving us an awkward look. I knew perfectly well what they were thinking, but I didn’t tell them it wasn’t that. Were I to start explaining what was going on, they wouldn’t believe me, and Violet would die of embarrassment. I was already dying of it, so I could do without having to deal with her. I gestured them to be quiet and to go back. My father just looked confused but fortunately, Violet’s understood what I meant and—giving me a thumbs up—dragged him back to the door while shushing him. I just had to wake her up and think of something that would keep her from understanding what was going on. I would also have to deal with the misunderstanding sometime later.

“Violet? Wake up,” I called while giving her pats on the side of the thigh.

“Mmh… What is it?” she mumbled as she squeezed me tighter and rested her head on my shoulder.

“We need to get ready. They must be arriving at any time.”

“Wake me up then,” she mumbled back. “Mmh, you’re so warm to hold.”

Why did she have to be so hard to wake up? And acting so cutely too.

“Won’t you be embarrassed if they saw us like this?” I urged her, trying to keep the conversation to just the two of us.

“Hmm… Yeah, I guess,” she said while lightening her grip.

“All right, miss sleepy head.”

I undid the rest of her hold and pulled her up with me. That actually felt painful, just not in a physical way.

“Let’s go wash that face. I refuse to let my dad see you like this.”

She grumbled something I couldn’t understand as I dragged her towards the bathroom by the hand, both because it was incoherent and because I was having chills on my back. If it was due to the cold because I wasn’t nested on her or because both our dads had their eyes on our backs I don’t know. What I do know is that I too needed to wash my face to cool down.

“Erm… what do you… erm… what do you think me and Violet… are?” I asked in a hushed tone.

I had left Violet go first, so I decided to take the time to clear things up. Sluggish as she was when woken up, I knew I had lots of time.

“Erm… aren’t you two… dating?” Violet’s dad asked.

Dad awkwardly nodded in agreement.

“Ah, no. We aren’t like that. We are… just friends,” I told them.

“Really? But we both heard… erm… well… noises,” my dad said.

“No, no! That’s a misunderstanding!” I whispered loudly. “Violet would never do such a thing. Ah!”

The way I worded it betrayed some of my inner thoughts and fears.

Violet wouldn’t. But what about me?

Perhaps that wasn’t enough for them to catch on to it, but the face I reflexively made was. It was now obvious they realised it.

“So… is it one sided?” Stan asked.

He did so surprisingly bluntly.

“It’s not like that… I mean… I… I don’t know… maybe?”

I confessed. I was afraid of what they would say next, but I told them anyway.

“Well, whatever it is, I think I speak for the both of us that we won’t oppose. Right?” Violet’s dad said.

“Erm, y-yes. I admit, I’m still getting used to it, but it’s like Stan told me yesterday. If you are happy, that should be enough.”

I was being accepted? After all my fears and worries, just like that, I was accepted for being like that?

“I’m sorry for being like this,” I said as I embraced my dad with tears forming in my eyes.

“Don’t be, sweety. I should be the one saying sorry for having been such a poor father,” he said as he patted my head.

“It’s all right dad. I know why you did all that. I know…”

I couldn’t finish my sentence as I started to choke on my words. By the way my dad’s chest shook, I could tell he was having the same reaction.

“Oh, erm… sorry,” a voice stammered.

“It’s ok, Violet. I think we are done talking.”

“Also, your dad is right over there.”

I was pointing to a corner of the room after having wiped my tears.

Violet peered around the doorframe to where I was pointing, looking confused.

“Hello there,” her father said cheerfully while waving.

Violet gave him a single hand wave as a response, looking to all of us even more confused. I now was just laughing. She really did make the funniest faces.

After having pizza for lunch, it came the time for me to go home. Well, back to the hotel. Anyway, my dad was in the car waiting for me to finish my farewells with Violet, which to be frank, were feeling more painful than ever. If I had to choose the reason between the time we spent apart and having to go our separate ways again, I’d say it was due to both.

“So, erm… I guess we will see each other at school,” I said.

“Yeah, although… I don’t think I’ll be going during the first week,” she said, pointing to her face.

“That’s probably for the best,” I concurred. “I could see them calling the police on your father if you did.”

“I hadn’t thought that far, but yeah.”

“…Want me to give you a call every day?” I said jokingly.

“…You don’t have to do it every day.”

That little pause that always betrayed her inner thoughts, how I’ll be missing it.

“Hehe. Around ten o’clock before you go to bed?”

“I’m… ok with that.”

“Ok, in that case, talk with you later?”

“We are doing it today?”

“Could you not…”

I started to point out the way she phrased it but stopped myself. Dad was waiting for me and that could take some time.

“Actually, never mind. I’m going now so, bye.”

“Hmm? Ok. Bye,” she said, confused.

Getting into the car, I was met with my dad making a funny expression. That got me curious.

“What’s up with that face?” I asked as he started driving off.

“Sorry. I was watching you talk with Violet and saw the faces she was making,” he explained. “Is she always like that?”

“Yup. It’s one of her best traits.”

“Is that what made you interested in her?”

“Hmm… Maybe at the beginning, but after dealing with her for some time, I came to like her personality the most.”

“I see,” he said with a nod.

“Is this about what I told you guys before?”

“No. I was just curious how you two became friends. We never talked about it at home.”

“Yeah…”

I looked back to all the times I wanted to talk about Violet, but dad was always in a hurry to go back to the office, and when he wasn’t, mum was nearby.

“Will you be going back to work?”

“I will, but not right now. I’ll be having a week of leave.”

“Erm… can I stay with you during that week?” I asked meekly.

“You mean… you don’t want to go to school?”

“Yeah… I don’t feal ready to face people yet, and… I think… we could use that time… to catch on.”

My dad thought about my request for a while.

“Ok, Abbigail. I would like that very much.”

My phone started ringing. I pulled it off wondering who might be calling. To my astonishment, it was Violet.

“Are you missing me that much already?” I said as I answered the phone.

“It’s not that! I just wanted to ask you if you saw where I placed my glasses.”

“Have you looked on the side table by the armchair? I think you placed it there when we were seating together.”

I could hear her rushing around before coming to a stop followed by a sigh.

“Found them. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome. Is that all?”

“Yes.”

“Ok, then. Bye.”

“Bye. Oh, wait!”

I stayed silent for a second to tease her a bit.

“Abby? Abby? Are you there?”

“Yes, I’m still here. What’s up?”

“I just wanted to tell you… have a safe trip.”

“Thanks. Talk with you later,” I said as I hung up.

My dad was back to having an amused expression. That felt very refreshing.

“So, what are we doing today?” I now asked my dad.

“Well, I’m going to check some places for us to live. Do you want to come along?”

“Sure. Sounds like it might be fun.”

“Fun? Are you planning on harassing me like you do to Violet?” my dad said with a grin.

“Gee dad,” I said in fake annoyance. “How about having some faith in me.”