Why on Earth... this world? This rock? Hell. Why on Elorn’s apple infested onerous rock did Eliaz allow Noa, of all people, to try sneaking into the restricted side of the farmhouse? He kind of wished Elvethor was actually Thor, because then he could just smash through everything, drop She-monstrosity on the other side of the planet, and everyone would be okay! Maybe except for She-monstrosity.

Focus! Noa thought, feeling that tug in his chest as he neared the back door of the family residence of the farmhouse. No lights shined through the windows, and given the time of night, he fully expected that She-monstrosity and Waroc were in bed.

Placing his hand on the doorknob, Noa slowly turned it, and scrunched his nose when it stopped. Locked. Being an actual thief right about now would be incredibly helpful. Unfortunately, Noa didn’t have much in the way of lockpicking experience.

He turned, and moved down to a window. The latching mechanism for this window was where it shut at, not in the middle of the window like he was familiar with. It was made of wood, and quite weathered. Setting his lantern down, Noa put both palms on the window, and while he looked down at the lock, jiggled the window a tad. When that didn’t work, he grew more aggressive, cringing at all the sound it made.

The lock snapped.

Noa grinned, then paused and stepped back, looking at the windows visible on this side of the farmhouse for any change. After he saw nothing, he pushed the window open, picked up his lantern, and climbed into the kitchen.

It was a meager kitchen, all things considered. An island with thick flour residue over it, a stone oven, fireplace lined with metal accessories, and a water basin with a small pump. This world confused Noa sometimes. They seemed so technologically behind, but then had things like hand cranked pumps and sliding windows that he seriously didn’t expect the era to have.

Moving slowly into a living room, Noa felt a sharp pull upwards. He looked up, and cringed. He was going to need to find stairs, and, with his luck, that lock was probably in the very bedroom She-monstrosity slept in.

An archway beyond the wide living room led into a hall, and eventually opened up to a foyer. Midway down the hall, graciously, was a set of steep stairs. Kind of narrow too. How did those two football-sized monsters get up these things?

Placing his foot on the first step, Noa winced at the loud creak it made. He was certain he couldn’t avoid the noise, but easing his weight at an agonizingly slow pace helped alleviate some of the sound. It didn’t alleviate his racing heart, much to his dismay. Every step was another twenty beats and rising, like his heart was pounding against his chest cavity until it could manage to jump right out.

When he reached the top of the stairs, Noa wanted to release the breath he’d been holding, but tightened up instead. After a few moments of deliberately exhaling at a slow pace, he slowly inhaled, and held his breath again before proceeding down a corridor.

The wood floor here was nearly as bad as the stairs, but Noa found that if he walked closer to the walls, it wasn’t as noisy. He followed the pull in his chest, his heart basically beating in its direction, and stopped in front of a wide door. The lock was beyond this door, and Noa was certain his worst fears were too.

I don’t have to face them, just... not wake them up, he told himself. He set his lantern a few paces away, then placed his hand on the doorknob. Twisting it, he opened the door at a snail’s pace, creaking it only as much as he needed to get through, especially worried about the light from the lantern in the corridor. With how pitch black it was right now, the light was necessary, but terrifying.

Noa clenched his teeth as he stepped into the room and stared at the large couple in their large bed, fast asleep. Pulling himself from them and to his task, he followed the spiritual pull towards a sliding barn door. Walking to it, every step slow and deliberate, Noa reached out for the handle of the door with the slightest tremble in his hand. As he began to roll it over, he heard a creak!

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

Freezing, he looked at the two in bed, and the larger lump moved the slightest bit before settling again. Noa refrained from letting out a sigh, and finished rolling the door away. Almost immediately, a powerful sensation from [Spirit Sense] washed over him. The tug he’d felt in his chest was overwhelmed by the crowd that was spilling out of the closet, which left Noa blind to where his lock was in a sea of clothing.

Aprons, dresses, jerkins, and all the like lined the deep closet walls. Hell’s bells! Noa thought, frowning. He racked his brain to remember the dark jerkin Waroc wore the day he broke Noa’s arm, or the trousers he had on. In the night, every jerkin was dark, and all the trousers looked the same!

Starting on what was obviously Waroc’s side of the closet, Noa shuffled through pockets. He even tried moving one way or another to feel a difference in the density of the spirits, but it felt the same, like they were stacked and pushed into the small space. The entire closet was practically a mini spirit empire. So he continued, pocket, after pocket, after pocket...

Midway through the trouser’s section, Noa heard a soft groan, followed by a voice.

Oh hell.

He quickly exited the closet on his toes, seeing both of them still in bed, but She-monstrosity was reaching towards her husband. Fortunately, she didn’t seem at all alarmed by Noa’s presence. Stepping out of the closet, he slowly closed it, but not all the way, fearing a creak at the same spot as before. Then, he moved towards the door as Waroc began to stir.

Stepping out, there was the slightest creak on the floorboards, and Noa instantly reached out, and with frustration, slowly closed the door. He could hear floorboards on the other side of it start creaking, gradually getting louder.

“Was that...?” Waroc said from the other side.

Crap, crap, crap!

Noa moved down the hall, picking up his lantern on the way, but when he heard the door swing open, he panicked and went into the nearest room. Erm... closet. Supply closet. He closed the door, not entirely sure if they heard the sound of it, but he was certain that if they’d been paying attention, they did.

Sweat dripped from Noa’s brow, and he opened his lantern door with a shaky hand. After blowing the light out and embracing the darkness, Noa waited, frozen with his breath held tight. His lungs burned by the time he heard someone exiting the room down the hall, their heavy steps creaking on just about every floorboard. He even felt the vibrations of each step from beneath him, growing in intensity until they stopped right outside his door.

“Waroc?” he heard, She-monstrosity practically yelling down the hall. “What were you saying?”

The floorboards rumbled as a second person came closer to Noa’s door. “Bennigan, Yana, Bennigan. I swore I saw him.”

Noa raised his brow. He saw me! he thought, clenching his jaw.

“Bennigan’s dead,” She-monstrosity said.

I knew it! They killed him!

Waroc huffed, then moved by. “I'll go check the doors,” he said, every step down the stairs moaning. They stopped briefly. “I swear, if this is that boy again...” he growled.

“Then we’ll take care of him too,” She-monstrosity said, and Noa clenched his jaw. He set the lantern down as the shaking in his hands worsened, fearing the tin thing might rattle.

I’m the “boy”, aren’t I? Noa thought, and slowly sank to the floor as his knees began quivering. He held them tightly and forced himself to breathe, each breath shallow. Why did Thor let me do this!

“Say the word. I think that boy’s more trouble than he’s worth.” Waroc moved further down the stairs. After several long strides, each with a loud snap of the boards below, he bellowed, “Window’s open!”

Noa jumped when the door rattled loudly as She-monstrosity banged on it. “Curses!” she yelled. The rumbling of groaning floorboards indicated that she started further down the hall, followed by aching stairs.

Letting out a soft sigh of relief, Noa squished himself further back into a corner of the supply closet, hiding amongst hanging towels, brooms, and mops. He listened to the chorus of creaks throughout the house, which eventually returned to the second floor. Doors banged open, and sweat rolled off of Noa’s brow.

It was only a matter of time. One door, then the next. A third across the hall, and then... They passed his door. For once, a part of him relaxed. They missed him━they ignored the small supply closet.

Thank... Elorn? Sure, yeah, him, Noa thought.

Now he just needed to wait until━

The door flew open with a loud crash!