It took a solid week of trekking through the jungle, with occasionally attacks by jungle monsters, and once or twice an ‘accidental’ push by Anyim into an encounter with oversized predators.

So much for the tiny possibility that he was an innocent bystander. The first time, I chalked it up to coincidence. The monsters were nearby, and he didn’t really know how powerful we were. The second time he did it, it had a distinct note of panic. We had, after all, easily defeated two megadiles, and a nearby nest of spiders.

I found myself a bit peeved, the second time around.

“Anyim?” I said, after the latest scuffle. I put on as sweet a smile as I could manage. “It’s really quite annoying when we have to fight off the crocodiles when the poison moths are flying overhead.”

He twisted his hands together and dipped repeated bows to me. “Of course, of course. I’m terribly sorry lady adventurer, but the jungle is very dangerous, I did say so!”

I amped my {Persuade} as far as I could. “You did, of course, and we appreciate that. But I would very much appreciate it if you’d work just a tiny bit harder to keep us away from larger monster nests like that. It slows us down, and I can only cook so many spider hotpots.” I tipped my head to the side, smiling hopefully at him. “If you’d like seconds on the meal, you only need to ask. I’m happy to share more! We’ve already packed a great many spiders into our packs.”

Anyim paled so much his skin turned a faint tan shade. “I-I’m terribly sorry Mistress! I will increase my efforts!”

The day after that, Anyim disappeared for several hours in the middle of the day, to scout ahead, he informed us. He came back deeply flustered, but when we asked what was wrong, he waved it off as a minor poison moth flight.

I dropped back to speak with Soriya as we moved deeper into the jungles. “He seems very upset. I wonder what’s going on?”

Soriya giggled, clapping her hand over her mouth. “You gave him the ‘smile of doom’ didn’t you?”

I frowned. “I don’t like it when you call it that! I simply asked that he be a little more careful with the pathfinding!”

Soriya laughed aloud. “Lily, I told you, that’s one of the most potent psychological attacks I’ve ever seen.” She sobered a little, and then continued. “And I suspect what happened is that he went ahead to try and warn his fellow cult members that we’re not the usual adventure group.”

I nodded, and rubbed my nose thoughtfully. “The second ambush did seem a little rushed. I didn’t think we were that overpowered!”

Soriya smiled. “Poison antidotes, absurd magical powers, and camp equipment that makes the trip easy.”

I snorted. “I wouldn’t say easy! I would kill for a bath!”

“We could do that, you know…?”

I stopped dead, my mouth hanging open. “Oh my goodness, you’re right! How…?!”

I raised my voice to call everyone. “Everybody! I have a thought! I’d like to go visit Breezewood with Gate! A bath would be wonderful, don’t you think?” I said cheerfully.

Everyone stopped, staring at me. Anyim was the first to break the silence. “A bath would be wonderful, yes, but we are miles from the nearest break, and the rivers are filled with carnivorous fish, what-?”

“Oh that’s a great idea, Lily!” exclaimed Eshaan.

Lakshmi looked at him and rolled her eyes. I blinked at that, then suddenly realized.

For all her talk of sky pirate, she was raised in a palace. She likely thinks that was pretty stupid to just give our enemy info like that. Which… well that’s Eshaan. I sighed. Well, the cat’s out of that bag, and it was my own fault. All because I wanted a bath.

“We possess a spell to travel distance.” I said to Anyim. “It doesn’t work to anywhere we haven’t been.”

Anyim blinked. “And you can… just return to anywhere you’ve been?” His eyes narrowed. “Is this difficult to cast?”

I sighed. Oh marigold and honeysuckle, that was really dumb of me. Now he’s wondering if we can just escape his trap!

“Oh no!” Soriya jumped in. “It requires both spellcasters and we can’t cast it if we’re distracted or immobilized, like any spell!”

Ah. Lying. I gave a mental sigh. Why am I… I fingered my pink ponytail. Well yes. Of course. I am increasingly glad that my best friend can lie for me. She’s been better at that ever since we were kids.

Anyim’s expression relaxed. “Ah, I see.” He clapped his hands. “Well! How long will you be gone?”

I blinked, and then said “Anyim… you can come with us? Wouldn’t it be nice to be clean and cool off?”

Anyim gave a grave frown. “Ah, but you must return here! There could be deadly dangers waiting, I will ensure that your return is safe! Provided you are not gone for days, of course?”

I blinked slowly, and then saw the looks everyone was exchanging. Lakshmi spoke up. “Right, it won’t take long. Just a few hours. We’ll just be back soon!”

Lakshmi? What are you doing?! I thought. If you don’t trust him, why…?

“Please, go ahead, Lilyanna!” Lakshmi said.

I frowned in puzzlement, then shrugged and called forth Gate.

Anyim staggered backwards, his eyes going wide as saucers when he saw the curling purple-black obsidian dragon curled around the doors, his eyes going even wider as I requested that Gate open to Breezewood.

I turned back to Anyim. “Are you… sure you won’t come with us?” I asked one last time.

“No, no. The jungle is like a home to me! I would not dare leave it!” He proclaimed proudly.

“Well… if you’re sure?” I said.

He nodded solemnly.

I shrugged once more and stepped through Gate to Breezewood. Just as my feet hit the dirt of my yard, a realization hit me on the head and I exclaimed aloud. “Oh I’m an idiot!”

Lakshmi popped into existence beside me. “Well yes, but you’re part of our crew, so we make allowances.” She grinned at me. “Now, what’s this?” She asked.

“Anyim is staying behind to arrange an ambush!” I exclaimed, stomping my foot in frustration.

Lakshmi stared at me, mouth agape. “You… really didn’t realize that? Until just now?!” She exclaimed. “Here I thought you had some big seer plan to trick him, and you… just wanted a bath?!”

The others popped into existence as she continued, and the swirling black vortex of Gate’s gate vanished behind us.

Eshaan’s eyes got wide and he said “Ooooh! So that’s what was going on!” with the most charming clueless…

Really I could kiss that man. I thought with embarrassed exasperation.

Eshaan laughed. “Well, a bath does sound great! And it’s so nice to have cool air to breathe!” he exclaimed.

Daniyel nodded. “That is indeed the case. But it seems obvious, at least to Lakshmi and myself. Anyim is of course planning to ambush us while we are absent. He knows where we will return, he knows approximately when. If you are truly set on a bath, I would suggest that you make it a long one. If we proceed with our plan to allow capture, it will likely be the last for quite some time.”

My heart sank. This is terrible. No bath for who knows how long…

Eshaan spoke up. “Well how far are we from the temple?”

Lakshmi threw up her hands in frustration. “Who knows?! That was the point of the guide! That and this stupid plan to get captured!”

Camaxtli said calmly “Approximately… 1 day of travel.”

Everyone turned to look at him. Lakshmi said “Camaxtli!?” In shock.

Camaxtli turned to her and gave a tiny shrug. “Simple logged milage, geospatial location, and the approximate location where we sought the designated structure while in the Sparrowhawk.”

“Oh.” Said Lakshmi. “Is that all.”

Camaxtli nodded. “That is all that was required.”

“Well…” I said hopefully. “A day won’t be too bad…”

“That is discounting the time it will take within the ruins, as well as the method of transit.” Said Daniyel. “People with captives do not travel as quickly as might be hoped.”

I stomped my foot in frustration. “Well what are we going to do then?!” I exclaimed angrily.

“The best we can.” Eshaan said gravely, and then gave me a quick hug. “It’s ok, Lily! We all make mistakes. Me more than most!” He laughed. “But I trust you. That’s not a mistake. We’ll figure it out, even if we bumble through it!”

I glared at him, even as I was warmed by his trust in me. “That’s not the point!” I exclaimed. “The whole point of a plan is that we don’t bumble! Just… wobble a bit!”

The group laughed, and I felt the tension dispel.

“Regardless.” Said Daniyel. “Our plan must be adapted to circumstance. And we are here.” He nodded seriously, and gestured around. “I suggest we make use of the facilities, and prepare for the next leg of our journey.”

I nodded. “Well then. Lets all have a bath! After I say hello to Mother!” I added.

The author's tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

Holly was glad to see me, and I was happy to see her again. I caught her up quickly, and was gratified to see her eyes widen in surprise and awe at how much I’d grown.

“You’ve certainly gone much farther than I expected, Lilyanna.” She said as I sat with her at the kitchen table. “And you’ve got so much further to go.” She leaned over and gave me a hug. “I’m proud of you. Go save the world, daughter.”

I smiled and gave her a quick nod. “Sure. It can’t be that hard, right?” I smiled weakly, but she laughed and that made it ok.

Soriya and Lakshmi were waiting for me at the bathhouse. “Any longer and we’d have taken the good spots ourselves!” Lakshmi declared haughtily. “Right, Soriya?”

Soriya hmmed softly and tapped her chin. “Would we? I wonder.”

Lakshmi scowled and rolled her eyes. “Wow, way to kill my momentum.”

I smiled at her and said “Soriya knows me very well, and despite how much I don’t know about her, I know her pretty well too. She wouldn’t leave me in doubt as to where you went.”

“Well.” Lakshmi put her hands on her hips. “You’re here now, so hurry up and change, I want that bath!”

I hurriedly shucked out of my clothes, and grabbed up one of the wash basins to mix the fire and water crystals in. We all moved into the bathing area together and started mixing our preferred crystal mix to get the right temperature of water.

It felt truly amazing to wash off the stink and sweat of 4 days of jungle travel. Even the air conditioning crystals couldn’t fully solve the issue. But a bath definitely did.

As we moved into the soaking pool, I could feel myself relaxing in a way I hadn’t been able to for… weeks at least! It seemed we were constantly on the move!

“Soriya?” I asked idly, as an idea floated up. “Why did you suggest going to Breezewood. You’re tons smarter than me, you must have seen the problem!”

Soriya’s eyes widened in surprise. “Smarter book learning, doesn’t mean smarter practical. You think I’m immune to the lure of a bath?! Especially in that jungle?!” She said defensively.

“Besides, it’s not that big a deal.” She continued. “This way we can leave our weapons here, so that when they disarm us, we don’t lose them.”

“Mmm. I was expecting to recover the weapons in the temple though. Or maybe just get new ones.” I said pensively.

Soriya laughed. “I think Eshaan would be hurt if you made him give up his favorite sword.”

I blushed. Eshaan had upgraded his weapon several times, but it was still the same sword I bought him back in Farna, when we first set out.

Lakshmi laughed. “He does treasure that weapon.” She sat up suddenly. “Hold on, after this, if we’re going to leave our weapons behind, we should just drop them off at the Sparrowhawk. Come to that… if my ship is missing again-!” She pointed her finger at me. “That will be five ships you’ve cost me!”

I shared a sudden glance with Soriya, a look of ‘how did we miss that?’ written clearly on her faces.

Lakshmi burst out laughing. “Oh this is priceless. You’re telling me that both our seers can’t see something this simple! I can’t believe I trusted you to keep my ship safe!”

“It is safe! Probably. Maybe.” I poked my fingers together shamefully. It was true, the party airship going missing would be just what you’d expect from a side plot like this.

Soriya stretched slowly, and I idly appreciated the view. Lakshmi was of the slender and athletic sort, and of course just as attractive as you might picture any jrpg princess to be. Still, I found my interest waning with the thought of Eshaan.

“Well, I think.” Said Soriya languidly. “That a bath is a good thing. And a trip to disarm at Sparrowhawk sounds like a fine idea. Though I’m sure the boys will complain.”

Lakshmi grumbled “Heck, I’m going to complain. I don’t like being without my blaster!”

I tapped my lips. “Actually, if I’m right about the temple, there’s probably going to be lots of mechanisms and traps and things.”

Lakshmi sat up eagerly, but her expression quickly soured. “How is that any better?! They’re sure to take my tool kit!”

“So leave it behind as well.” Said Soriya. “We’ll just retrieve our weapons from the Sparrowhawk.”

I shook my head. “No, that won’t work. If we get too close to the next Arcanum, remember Gate won’t work for us! Once we’re in the temple… we’re there for a good long while.”

Lakshmi sat back thoughtfully. “But you’re sure that we’ll have equipment of some kind?”

I waffled my hand back and forth. “Reasonably, yes. And if it’s not, then there will be mechanical guardians or traps that you can take apart and reuse as tools.”

Lakshmi perked up again. “That sounds like fun!”

I smiled. “I’m glad you think so. Still…” I patted at the water in frustration. “I really should have realized that this was… not a great plan. But this bath feels so good. I really hope the trip to the temple isn’t long.”

Soriya sighed. “I can make small ice crystals, and there’s the fact we’ll probably be riding in cages of some sort.”

“Grand sacrifice?” I asked idly.

“Oh yes, with ritual chanting and plot revelations aplenty.”

Lakshmi slapped the water surface. “I guess we’ll know soon enough. But we are going to check on the Sparrowhawk!” She said vehemently.

I nodded in agreement. “Yes, of course.”

Less than an hour later, we were gathered back in my yard, and stepping through Gate back to Mabanu.

The hot fetid air of the jungle port hit our nose, at the same time as the loud roar of a crowded city hit our ears. Several shouts of surprise and shock mingled with them, as people registered the appearance of an enormous purple black door surrounded by a coiled dragon, but that was at least moderately expected. Gate had dropped us at the port itself, as requested.

Facing away from us, an enormous crowd surrounded the Sparrowhawk, loud cries and calls roiling the crowd. It took me a moment to recognize what was happening.

“-Forty-four!”

“Forty-five!

“I have forty five hundred thousand!”

“Fifty!”

“Five hundred thousand! Do I hear fifty one?!”

Lakshmi spun and grabbed me by my collar and shook me.

“They are selling my ship!” She screamed at me.

Camaxtli said with his trademark calm “I believe this is technically an auction-“

Lakshmi whipped her head around and screamed “NOT! THE! POINT!”

Daniyel pulled her off me with gentle but implacable force and said calmly “Then we should clarify our status to these gentlefolk, that the Sparrowhawk is not for sale, yes? Perhaps before the final bid is taken?”

Lakshmi dropped me like a hot rock, spun, and dashed into the crowd. A small dot of bright red pushing and elbowing her way through the crowd causing a widening rippling disturbance as she went.

By the time she reached the front, the rest of us were halfway through the gap she’d created by her dash.

Lakshmi came to a stop just in front of the auctioneer, a pair of burly guards stopping her from reaching the man. Off to the side, I saw a sudden start, and a rapid movement away as a bright green shock of hair started pushing through the crowd in the opposite direction.

I briefly thought about going after him, but shook my head. You can run. I don’t think Lakshmi will let you hide. You’re the port master, after all. I thought grimly.

I sighed. I should have known. Still, we’ve already had the ‘lost airship’ plot, this feels so redundant! I grumbled to myself.

At the auctioneer’s podium, Lakshmi was angrily dangling a pair of keys and shouting. “-and don’t think you’re going to get very far with my airship without the keys! There isn’t an engineer in this city that could keep her in the air without me!”

“Miss, I assure you, this airship was lawfully appropriated by-“ the auctioneer turned to see the obviously surprising absence of the port master or any port authority.

“Right! So he’s gone, I’ll be taking my ship back!” Lakshmi shouted, and started towards the Sparrowhawk, only to be stopped by the burly guards. Her eyes narrowed to angry slits.

“Oh, you’re going to dare the wrath of Lakshmi the Red then, are you?! Loyal crew!” She called to us, and we stepped out of the crowd. Daniyel flexed his arms and his magitech gauntlets appeared around his hands.

I heard quick murmurs and bubbling surprise in the crowd.

“-did she say ‘the Red’?”

“-impossible, she’s just a story!”

“-I read her most recent book, that was good-“

My eyes almost popped out of my skull. Lakshmi has books about her already?! I thought wildly. Eshaan is going to flip his lid! Lakshmi will be impossible to deal with now!

“Lily?” Soriya patted my arm. “Fight now. Lost in headspace later.”

“R-right!” I jerked back to awareness.

The fight was an anti-climax. Four more burly guards appeared and engaged us. Daniyel hit one and he staggered backwards, falling to one knee. Eshaan moved like lightning, a single sword slash that seemed to hit every guard at once, slash marks appearing on their clothes followed by dripping red. Camaxtli didn’t even get to draw his sword before the guards were backing off, limping away, and raising their hands in surrender.

I had to admit, I liked this a lot more than the idea of yet more drops from dead people just trying to do their job.

Lakshmi stepped over the guards, and then turned to the crowd. “Sorry all, but Lakshmi the Red does not share her ship!” And then with a swirl of her longcoat, she was gone into the hatch. The rest of us followed quickly, and I felt a little flicker of a smile dance over my lips as we entered.

That was surprisingly entertaining. I thought, as the hatch closed behind us.

In the cockpit, I heard the sound of Lakshmi settling, and then the familiar roar of the engines starting up behind us. Lakshmi shouted over her shoulder at the rising sound.

“Lily! I’m still counting this as a loss! You owe me five ships now!”

I smiled even as I shook my head.

Well, at least we’re still avoiding the worst of the tropes. I thought wryly, plopping down in one of the seats as the Sparrowhawk lurched into the air, and took off.

Daniyel took up a position just behind the cockpit, his hand on the frame and asked over the thrum of the engines. “This still leaves us in a conundrum. We must return to the spot where we left our guide, but we also must safely store the Sparrowhawk.”

“Already got it covered.” Lakshmi announced, turning hard to the left, and curving us around towards the ocean.

“I spotted a nice little cove as we were on approach. And since everyone saw us leave, very loudly, north, we should be safer on the ocean. And just to be sure… I’m going to rig up a little surprise for anyone who touches my ship.”

“And you’re not worried about sea serpents?” Eshaan asked.

Lakshmi bit her lower lip. “Ok, I’m a little worried about sea serpents or whatever horrors Lily’s “plot” drags out of the ocean at us… but this is outrageous, my baby was about to be auctioned!”

Camaxtli said “While it could be argued that the Sparrowhawk is your offspring, I do not think it merits-“

Lakshmi rounded on him. “It’s just an expression!”

“Oh.” Said Camaxtli, then frowned. “While the Goddess System has prevented language drift, it appears that idioms and cultural touchstone parlance have still changed. Curious.”

We landed on a rocky shoreline with a gorgeous white sand beach. The air was still fetid and thick, but the breeze from the ocean could almost convince me that I was back home. My first home, on that beach where I’d fallen asleep.

I felt a sudden brief surge of homesickness, wondering what had happened to that old me, to my home and family.

I don’t suppose I’ll ever know. If I died… like Soriya said she did… I scuffed the toe of my boot in the sand and thought. Most people don’t even get a second chance. I’ve had three or four. I looked over at my friends, and then felt a warmth flow up from my heart. And I have the best friends. And… a boyfriend. So. That’s new.

I wandered over and kissed Eshaan on the cheek. He blinked in surprise and looked over at me. “What was that for?” He asked in surprise.

“Oh… nothing much. Just being exactly who I expected you to be, and not at all what I was expecting.” I said cheerfully.

He frowned in confusion, then said. “Lily… sometimes you’re very confusing.”

The Sparrowhawk was quickly camouflaged in much the same way that we’d done in the Monan cave, though with considerably less practice than the smuggler couple had done for us. Still, better than nothing. And apparently better than leaving it in a port city renowned for missing adventurers!

With our airship safely stowed, we prepared ourselves to get captured. It was an argument, but eventually the group left our weapons and gear in the Sparrowhawk, and I summoned up Gate.

We stepped through to find Anyim sitting by a small fire. He jerked to his feet when he saw us. “Ah, noble guests! You have returned, just as promised!” His smile became cruel. “Just as was foreseen indeed! And now, I’m afraid, our journey together must end!”

All around the clearing, masked figures in green leafy armor appeared, holding spears that sprouted leaves, with tips that glittered with black glass.

“For you see!” Anyim continued, and threw back his hands, and I gasped in genuine surprise, because without any cloak or wash of clothing, he suddenly changed his outfit to match the grassy green of the others.

I clapped my hands. “Oh! Oh, Soriya! He did it! He did an anime clothes change trick!”

Soriya nodded agreement. “Yes, I saw it. That’s got to be a System trick. We should ask him how he does it, imagine how helpful it would be for changing clothes, or getting dressed!”

Eshaan rolled his eyes and shook his head at us before stepping forward and holding up his hands. “We surrender.”

Anyim didn’t appear to have heard him. “Yes, you will surrender to us now! You are surrounded by the guardians of the Goddess of Green Silence! You will be given to her to give her the endless quiet she craves!”

Lakshmi sighed and looked at me, then looked down and muttered “I’m not sure how good it is that when I want her to be wrong, she’s not, but when I trust her, she is.”

Eshaan cleared his throat and tried again. “We surrender.”

Anyim continued his posturing. “Your might is useless here in the domain of the Goddess-“

One of the masked figures behind him stepped forward and said loudly “Brother. They have surrendered.”

“What?” Anyim finally jerked back to awareness, staring at us, standing mildly before him. He glared at all of us in turn, then spat “What trick is this?!”

Daniyel raised a single eyebrow. “Would you prefer that we fight?”

“Fighting is useless before the might of the Goddess!” Anyim declared.

The masked figure next to him shook his head and said in a loud voice “Since they have surrendered, knock them out, and we will take them to the Temple for judgement!”

I felt a stinging pain in the back of my head, and the world spun and grew dark.

Oh that’s not fair. I thought as I crumpled. You can only knock out someone who’s surrendered?! What stupid mechanics!