Haruto had been through a lot.
[✓] Survived getting isekai'd.
[✓] Maxed out every stat by accident.
[✓] Got rejected from every normal job.
[✓] Accidentally gained a harem of weirdos.
[✓] Spent three months planning the perfect escape.
[✓] Got caught within five minutes.
But this—
This was the final straw.
Lilia, the yandere Demon Lord, stretched lazily on his couch like she owned the place.
Emberis, the smug Dragon Emperor, had kicked off her boots and was now claiming a corner of the house.
Princess Emilia was dusting off a chair and organizing his kitchen like she lived here.
Fel, the thief, was already stealing his food from the pantry.
And the worst part?
They were talking like they were moving in.
"We'll all fit comfortably," Emilia said, nodding.
"Mhm. I'll take the biggest room," Emberis announced.
"I call the bed with Haruto~," Lilia sang.
Haruto froze.
His brain completely shut down.
His vision went dark.
Then—
It happened.
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A scream so loud, so absurdly powerful, that it shook the entire village.
---
Haruto Finally Loses It
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—"
The roof nearly caved in.
The windows shattered.
The trees outside bent backward.
Birds flew off in terror.
The entire village shook.
Lilia, Emberis, Fel, and Emilia stared at him.
Haruto was on his knees, fists clenched, eyes blank.
"YOU'RE. STAYING. HERE?" he whispered, voice trembling.
Lilia grinned. "Of course, darling. Where else would we stay?"
Haruto's eyelid twitched. "Somewhere NOT HERE?!"
"That's not an option," Emberis said smugly. "You are mine, little human. I must be near you."
Fel swiped another piece of bread. "Yeah, and rent is expensive, so this is perfect~."
"I will take care of the household duties," Emilia added cheerfully.
Haruto breathed in.
Breathed out.
Then—
He exploded.
Haruto's Ultimate Breakdown: The Full Experience
"I SPENT THREE MONTHS ESCAPING YOU PEOPLE."
Haruto grabbed his own hair, eyes wild.
"I FAKED MY DEATH. I RAN THROUGH A FOREST. I JUMPED INTO A RIVER. I DRESSED LIKE A WEIRD OLD MAN."
Lilia nodded approvingly. "Yes, yes, and it was adorable~."
"NOT THE POINT!"
Haruto grabbed a chair and threw it out the window.
"I BOUGHT A HOUSE IN A REMOTE VILLAGE. I BLENDED IN. I CHOPPED WOOD LIKE A NORMAL PERSON. I WAS PEACEFUL."
Fel chewed her bread. "Sounds fake, but okay."
"I SAT ON MY PORCH AND WATCHED THE SUNSET LIKE A MAN WHO HAD ESCAPED HELL."
Emberis tilted her head. "Yet here we are."
"AND NOW YOU'RE ALL MOVING INTO MY HOUSE?!"
Lilia smiled sweetly. "Yes~."
Haruto punched the floor.
"GODS ABOVE. FATE. DESTINY. WHOEVER IS LISTENING. I DEMAND A RECOUNT!"
Silence.
The heavens did not answer.
Haruto slumped against the wall, completely defeated.
His soul had left his body.
---
The Girls Make It Worse
"Anyway," Lilia stretched, completely ignoring Haruto's breakdown. "I'll take the master bedroom."
"I will reinforce the house's structure," Emilia said. "It will be fit for royalty in no time."
"I will heat the bath with my flames," Emberis added, pleased with herself.
Fel was already stealing his pillows. "Dibs on the softest bed~."
Haruto slowly lifted his head.
"This is a nightmare."
Lilia patted his shoulder. "Shhh, dear husband. Don't resist fate."
Haruto curled into a ball.
---
Haruto's Last Stand (Complete Failure)
"Fine!" Haruto snapped, jumping to his feet. "You wanna live here? Fine! But I'm making RULES."
The girls tilted their heads.
Haruto grabbed a scroll, dipped a quill in ink, and furiously scribbled.
House Rules (by Haruto, the only sane person here):
1. No breaking walls.
2. No fire inside the house. (Emberis, this means you.)
3. No stealing my stuff. (Fel, this means you.)
4. No summoning demons at 3 AM. (Lilia, this means you.)
5. No trying to make me a prince. (Emilia, this means you.)
6. No calling me 'husband.'
7. No fighting inside the house.
8. No sudden proposals.
9. No—
Before he could finish, Lilia took the scroll and burned it to ashes.
Haruto's eye twitched violently.
"...I hate it here."
---
The Final Straw
Haruto turned to the front door.
"Fine. You win. I'm leaving."
"Going where?" Emberis asked, amused.
"Anywhere that isn't here."*
Haruto reached for the doorknob—
Click.
It didn't budge.
"...Huh?"
He pulled again.
Click.
The door was locked. From the outside.
Lilia smiled. "Oh, silly me! I may have placed an unbreakable sealing spell on the house~."
Haruto froze.
Fel smirked. "Looks like you're stuck with us, boss~."
Emberis grinned. "What a delightful development."
Haruto's scream shook the heavens once more.