I needed… more than a minute to recover. I made my way to the Records Room, on the basis that it had a chair and a desk. I sat in the chair. I stared at the loot box and bags on the desk. And I didn’t move for a long while.

What the hell was that? What the actual Hell was that?!

My hands shook. I tried to bury my face in them, but my face was shaking too. The barriers of dissociation had been crumbling for a while now, but this? This was too much. This was too real. Too immediate. Too much like growing up a weeb in a jock school, and your parents are doing their best but they can’t be around much.

I tried to breathe through it. Let the performative “human” behavior calm me. I could lose myself in the illusion if I tried. I hoped, anyway. I was real. Versai was kind of real. The rest of the world was fake. If I could just… hang on to that… I could make it okay.

What happened in the pit was scripted behavior. Characters playing out their backstories and responding to the triggers I had set through my adventure progression.

Remember when F.E.A.R. came out and everyone was blown away by the “A.I.” decades before that was a real thing? It wasn’t A.I., it was smart level design and well scripted robots. That’s all. The designers just made you think they were alive.

This is some real fear right here. Good job devs. You got me. I’m shook.

I just waited. Hoping that sooner or later my subconscious would shake out all the bits. I could hear the music box playing through the door. I left it in the Throne Room for Versai. She played it less than I thought she would, but when she did start playing it, it would repeat over and over and over again. Dozens of times. I would have to pull her away to do… whatever was the next thing.

I looked at her figurine. Valkyrie was what I thought, but no, she was a genuine article warrior princess. Well, not genuine. A marquess was not a king. But close enough, right?

Some morbid humor poked me and I dumped out the bags and the big chest on a heap on my desk. It was… immense. And pathetic.

It was trash.

Oh, not literally, and not all of it. I netted enough resonance crystals to bring me up to eighty seven, total. That’s a lot. I might have enough crystals for a new summons once I turn in some missions. But those crystals were the absolute best of it.

Furniture orders. Fun. Might be something there. Resource packs. Great. We would have no shortage of trash tier resources in the near future. My workers could make some good stuff, I’m sure. Maybe even some traps.

Speaking of, there were some traps. No fire, nor tarpit, but appropriately, there were four pit traps. So. Something. Not what I wanted, but something.

There were a bunch of bits and bobs that looked like quest items for quests I didn’t have and storylines I didn’t know about. A key. A bedknob. A large but apparently inedible green leaf. A few notes packed with cryptic and ominous text. Although one in particular was of interest. It came from the prize chest.

Written in crude letters-

“It’s done. I sent Griselda with the Circus as the “Nurse.” She’s as strong as my brothers, or near enough. She can hold him, they will hit him. Vengeance will be yours. Now run. You did more than your bit. Run now. Please. -Daph.”

She must have known I would see the note. She was the one who delivered the box. Must have some idea that Sebastian and others were trapped in the same little loop that she was. Did other Tower Masters tell her? We were far, far from the first to have arrived, though I got the impression we were the first to have arrived having done the sub-sections in what I would consider the correct order and, most crucially, had Versai in the party.

Could you clear this dungeon other ways? The two combat rooms, sure, though we wouldn’t have gotten the inside story without talking to Sebastian, and it wasn’t clear to me that his taking me hostage was something that happened to everyone. For example, if he had tried that neck stabbing maneuver on Rakim, I’m not sure her health pool would have held up under the attack. Theoretically, he could have cleared an entire team solo, depending on composition and tactics.

The Bloody Pit was, ironically, the story mission, despite being the most lethal. There were pretty clearly other routes through it that I didn’t take, but… I had a feeling we were the only ones who ever made it out alive.

There were so many millinery orders, furniture orders, resource packs, and rune bones in front of me. My god, the Rune Bones. Hattie might be willing to see me now. Not that I was going to try her patience. But the other stores might actually have something worth buying.

Worth checking the flyers in the throne room. Might just be something useful. It would be reasonable to expect the fifth wave to throw a new monster type or new mechanic into the mix. Or both.

There was a card on the table with a bright brassy edge to it. It turned out to be a Made to Order receipt. Big whoop. I was about to toss it, when I recognized the face on it… sort of. If Mika was twenty-five and pissed off about it, she might look like this.

Gendua Territorial Defense Squad- NCO Promotion. Usable by any Member of the Gendua Territorial Defense Force who is part of a squad and has reached Level Cap.

And… that was it, apparently. It was enough. A unit promotion card. A GOD DAMN UNIT PROMOTION CARD!

“YES! HALLELUJAH AND HAIL THE GODDESS!”

I dove on the filing cabinet and yanked out Mika’s sheet-

Mika

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HP 200 points

Attack 100 points

Defense 5 points

Block 20 points

Speed 80 points

ULTIMATE ABILITY UNLOCKED: Unit Effect- When four or more Mika’s are deployed together, with none more than a pace apart from each other, they can activate their Shield Tower. Rate of fire vastly increases, Attack increases as does Block and Defense. Specifics scale with number of Mikas deployed as a unit. Can only be used once per wave, and after each activation the deployed Mikas will enter a Fainted state.

Mika is a little worried she won’t do a good job as part of the Gendua Defense Force, but she knows what the whistles and drums mean. She knows why Daddy’s up in heaven, and why Mommy cries at night. She knows why her little brothers and sisters act scared or mean. She knows why Grandpa Guss stares out towards the mountains, and why Granny keeps saying that “she ate before,” so she doesn’t need a portion at dinner. Why Pop Pop and Grandma Tonka keep wearing their old uniforms and saying that even old fingers can pull a trigger.

Mika knows. So she picks up her shield and carries her bow and will never, ever, back down!

Likes cream pastries and bunnies. Dislikes cowards. Hates traitors. HATES TRAITORS. HATES TRAITORS. HATES TRAITORS. HATES TRAITORS.

Part of the Gendua Defense Force. Requirements complete! Can form: Genuda Defense Force- Crossbow Squad.

I swear the line about hating traitors almost vibrated off the sheet. I manfully ignored it.

There was a scattered heap of Stone Tapes on the table. I grabbed ‘em, and bolted from the room. I was down at the clothing shop so fast, I must have looked like I teleported.

I slammed the order card on the table and glared at the colorful clerk.

“Bring it.”

“For whom?” She asked, her voice annoyingly chirpy.

“Mika.”

“Oh how nice. It’s her picture on the card they used, so-”

“Less talky more fetchy. Hop to it.”

She did. As soon as I was out of the shop- “MIKA ALPHA, FRONT AND CENTER!”

There was a sudden clatter, as though an enormous shield had been dropped by a startled summons, then a scraping noise, and trotting sounds as someone, impossible to guess who, started jogging up the stairs.

“Mika is here, you have nothing to fear?”

“You know, you have been the cornerstone of my defensive strategy from Day One. I have way more of you than any other type, but… fair to say I have built around the Mikas. So it is fitting that you get the first upgrade.”

I handed over the stone tapes until she refused to take any more. I was going to guess… Level Twenty. I’d check later. I handed her the card with the uniform in it. She snapped it, and there was a burst of white light. Bright- blindingly bright, it covered her entirely! When I finally regained the ability to see, Mika had transformed. There was a glowing box in front of me-

Gendua Defense Force Squad- minimum six members, one of whom must be promoted to NCO rank. Autofill?

I clicked yes. It was full of Mikas. No surprise there.

Confirm Gendua Defense Force- Crossbow Squad creation?

I clicked yes, again. There was a much smaller flash, and I could finally take a good look at the transformed Mika.

She had filed out some, swapping the turtle neck for something more functionally military. Collared shirt, in an olive drab. Not sure about the combat utility of leaving the top three buttons unbuttoned, but then, I never served. Worked for her, though. I swear I could see a hint of a tattoo peeking out from the bottom of her rolled sleeves.

Mika’s skirt stayed, naturally, tightly stretched by well developed glutes. Completing the glow-up, her boots had been swapped for combat boots. The combat boots, as convention demanded, had a respectable heel on them. I, personally, wouldn’t want to run in them, but then, Mika wasn’t one for running.

Despite the added “flavor” in the costume and the improved “plot,” I couldn’t move past her eyes. No. Mika wasn’t one for running, and another seven years in the trenches hadn’t changed that one bit.

There was something there I couldn’t quite put words to. Something that said you couldn’t hurt them, but they could sure hurt you. Not cruel, but… hard. This was a Mika that understood she would live a bloody life, and made her peace with it. She wasn’t scared anymore. She had overcome her clumsiness. Steady. The violent solution to the monster problem. Or the problem-people problem.

I remembered the line about hating traitors and cowards. I suddenly wondered if Mika had led a firing squad.

“Mika’s here. You have nothing to fear.” It wasn’t an exclamation this time. It was a declaration.

“Mika, report. What improvements do you have now that you have been promoted?” Old Mika couldn’t answer that. Could new Mika?

“Reporting to the Tower Master- Having been promoted to Corporal, I can now lead my Crossbow Squad. The squad is in every way more capable than an individual soldier. We fire faster, more accurately, at longer range, and with more penetrative power in our bolt. Our Shield Tower can be triggered once every five minutes instead of once per battle. It is also considerably more effective, and our weakened period after using it is sixty seconds.”

God, new Mika was just the hottest thing on two legs. Just… intensely attractive on that haunted golem level we were sharing.

“We also have improved armor and health, but I have always felt that if a crossbow unit is in melee, someone has BADLY screwed up. Sir.”

Good point well made. Very well made.

“Mika… Corporal Mika, how many stars are you rated?”

“One, Tower Master.” She grinned, not a comfortable look. There was something uncomfortably knowing in her eyes. “But I’m an NCO. I’m a hell of a lot more on the ball than the rest of the enlisted. Been kicked around long enough to know how to kick other people into the right places, doing the right things. Just generally a lot more capable.”

“Would you say… six times more capable than a Private level Mika?”

“Not in terms of combat capability. Honestly Sir, I’m more capable but not that much more capable. But in terms of leadership? Ability to understand the situation, communicate, even take local command if necessary? Oh yeah. I can do that.”

Interesting. On many levels, but the word “leadership” stood out like a long nail. Versai never gave orders. She took pains to not provide anything remotely like leadership. Interesting, interesting! The squad leaders weren’t hero units- they were exactly what it said on the label. Squad leaders.

It occurred to me that I still had a big pile of loot to sort through. Still had three orders to use building defenses. Traps to set. Whatever Rache had managed to recover from that pond.

Now, it was a mortal certainty that the Fifth wave was going to throw some absolute nonsense, some completely unfair, unbaked, unbalanced “cinematic” garbage straight at us.

I could hardly wait.