Floor-to-ceiling windows dressed with a thin layer of paper journal—the latter being a material almost impossible to find these days—covered the whole wall facing the door, letting the light of the sunshine go through but forbid anyone outside to see what was happening. From the exterior, it must look like another abandoned house, just like the majority of the other residency in the area.

I knew we went down to the west, and must be around thirty minutes from the center, but I didn’t know the ward enough to remember the pathing, or reminisce about a mission I could have had in the vicinity.

The rest of the studio was pretty plain, a few violet lights carefully placed so they wouldn’t reverberate outside lit the living room. An old leather couch, a dusty rug on the floor, but on the right side, a large and long rack filled with books brightened up the place. A sliding door next to the shelves probably led to his bedroom and on the left, a small opened kitchen, with a few counters, a half-sized refrigerator and some utensils I figured wasn’t used this much. Another door to the left drove to the bathroom.

The glow of the violet lights was the only color that could be distinguished, very tamed and almost indiscernible. The Shadow entered, gesturing for me to close the door. Five locks. I imagined the Jalyons kicking it with a strong and powerful blow of the foot and destroying them all. But I guessed he couldn’t be more careful. “Let’s talk,” I finally said after minutes of waiting. I wanted the plan and the bargain he forced me into.

He stood tall. He was almost my size, a few centimeters down but I wasn’t medium. He was large and seemed shaped but his equipment was thick and layered, and it curved his general silhouette. After a few seconds staring at each other, he took off his hood and a long braid of light brown hair uncovered.

I frowned. “Yes. Let’s talk,” he said before removing the device over his throat. Not for breathing then. His neck and nape were pretty narrow for a man, but again, every aspect was possible. But the more I looked, and the more disturbed I was. Until the Shadow spoke once more, and detached the mask enveloping her face. “We have a lot to hover.”

The terrible threat to the Jalyons was a woman. A woman that was nicknamed the Shadow and terrorized more than one person around Kendara, but was also respected for her work. Sometimes acting like a justiciar, although taking pleasure in her killing. If only the Jalyons knew, they would drastically increase their search, just so they would have the opportunity to torture another woman after decades without ever finding one. It was now even more coherent that she would dress up this way, cover herself this much. But what was the point for her to unravel her true nature to me? What was she planning? “I can see your shock.”

“It’s not every day I encounter a woman.” I replied, my feeling sweetening for an unknown reason.

She continued unstrapping her gear, dropping them over the couch one by one, left with a long-sleeved t-shirt and her large cargo pants that somehow fitted her perfectly. “I know, it’s breathtaking,” she hummed ironically but without a ghost of a smile on her face. “Moving on.”

She had sun-drenched skin, only different from everyone on Zelian. Like she was made for the dryness and the dust, her aura vibrant and luminous. Her forehead and nose almost formed a straight line and a light bump robed the latter. Full and round lips, a generous chin with carved jaws, she was magnificent. Not that I had seen a lot of women to compare. Only the one in my head. I almost drifted into daydreaming at the thought of her, but the Shadow started talking, forcing me into the present. “You can sit if you wish.”

“I’m alright standing,” I replied, a bit surprised by her hospitality. “Why would you show me your true nature?”

She cocked her head to the side, as if I was the most incomprehensible creature she ever had to deal with. “You’re in my stash. I’m not going to roam around with all my costume on. I need a shower and a snack.”

I nodded, looking around, seeing nothing personal as photos or paintings. No valuables. We had no photos either at the cottage, but that was more because cameras were very hard to collect, and Hidram and I had never been close enough to share such moving moments. And she was living here out of necessity. She didn’t have time nor envy to decorate the place. “You could have waited for me to be asleep,” I remarked and she smirked.

“Something tells me you won’t be sleeping much.”

“You would be wrong.” I said, my tone irrevocable. My vivid dreams and nightmares were diving into my subconscious where I had no control over it. Someone could shove steel over my throat that I wouldn’t sense it. And of course, I couldn’t decide whether to experience these dreams or not, keeping me shackled with invisible chains. The moments where I had to close my lids always made me apprehensive. She eyed me curiously but didn’t ask further.

“You and Vishan destroyed what I had been planning for months.” She spat, grabbing something from the fridge and coming back to the living room, slouching on the couch, arms on the backrest. I felt a bit stupid standing up in front of her, only the small table separating us, but my pride had taken a large place in my heart.

“Not my intention to be set up in a trap.”

“Of course not. I’ve watched you. Many times.”

My lids slithered. “What do you mean?”

“More and more of your missions got closer to the Jalyons. To their territory.”

“Never this much,” I defended myself, but not an ounce of judgment coated her words.

She straightened, took a mouthful. “Your father had always wanted to bite off more than he could chew. And Vishan knew how to talk to him.”

“I don’t care about it. He could have promised him the power, the gold, the universe, he’s a dumb man and I’m better off away.”

She glared at me from under her lashes, and smiled. Maybe she wanted to see to what extent I was ready to invest myself in her plan, maybe she waited for me to say these words, but they were nothing but the truth. This had gone too far.

“Unfortunately, you’re going to need to stay here just a little bit longer.”

I remembered her words in the forest. Bait.

“Explain,” I ordered.

“Vishan is going to hunt you down until he has his way with you.”

“I’m aware.”

“And we’re going to pretend you want to meet with him.”

A small part of me figured this was going to happen this way. My two options were actually just one. Siding with the Shadow and meeting with Vishan. She spoke again, when she saw I stayed silent, because of the rest of the explanation I needed. “This will make them open their barriers, their gate I had tried to counter for years but could never. Always too many guards, too much protection. I’ve been taking them down so their numbers would decrease, for the moment I would finally make my way inside and cut Vishan’s head myself. This will be my opportunity.”

That, I didn’t see it coming. For the simple reason that killing Vishan was an absurd idea. He was the closest we had of a leader, although he implanted his powers and authority through fear. Zelian barely remained because of this semblance of hierarchy, but ending Vishan’s sort of reign would unleash pure chaos over our planet. The Jalyons had been kept in ranks because he imposed it on them. He was the smartest of them all, and they stayed in lines just as a result of Vishan’s ascendancy. “This is unreasonable.” I said.

She stood up, leaving her food on the table, half-eaten, and contoured it, facing me from an inch away. She was furious, but resolved. “I’m not acting out of reason. This is my revenge.”

“Why?”

“This doesn’t concern you.” She hissed.

“Since I’m playing bait, I think it does concern me.” She lifted her chin, proud, looking at the ceiling, pensive. She reached for one lock of my hair untied from my bun and caressed it in a menacing way. So close to my neck, I wasn’t reassured. She was strong. Powerful. Maybe she manipulated magic, I didn’t know the Shadow but the Shadow knew me. And I didn’t possess the advantage. I shivered, in a bad way.

“We’ll both have to flee after this anyway. Kendara has nothing else to offer for us.”

“Flee where? All the cities around have disappeared, every inhabitant came here after their houses were destroyed.”

A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

She looked down at my chest, her eyes filled with a weird expression. She lost her smile, she dropped the act and talked so sincerely, I felt it in my heart. “Anywhere.”

When our eyes met again, I saw the resolution. I saw everything I needed to see to agree to her terms. Because what other choice did I have? Flee right now? On my own, with no certainty of the future? She wanted my help, needed it, even. And maybe I was wrong. Maybe terminating Vishan’s domination would snap the spell he casted over the population and another regime will start. A better one. Someone would take over him and administer new rules. Either way, I wouldn’t be there to see. She was right, this place had nothing to offer to people like us.

I sighed, turned around toward the kitchen and I grabbed the same snack she ate, sat on the couch and took a bite, before concluding. “So, what’s your plan?”

֍

Hours after talking it out, I laid on the sofa, playing with my dagger, swiftly manipulating it over my fingers, until the bathroom door opened and she came out of it, dressed with not much more than a towel. She had long legs and I could see most of it, the bump of her behind curving the fabric significantly. She was beautiful, I already figured that out. But these kinds of attractions never occurred to me, not in my day-to-day life. During the nights, when the dreams would take me under their arms, I would sometimes experience pure bliss, so close to the reality, it would fog my mind for hours after waking up. Seeing the Shadow in front of me, almost completely naked, strong limbs and peach-smoothed skin, I understood what some men had said about women. About the fascination they emitted. The undeniable pull they could yank any second.

She had stopped dead in her tracks while I drank the sight of her and talked over her shoulder. “Please, keep on devouring me, I wouldn’t want to disturb you.”

Ashamed, I turned my head. She was gorgeous. But I wasn’t attracted. My body, mind and soul were already locked. In a way I had no say over it. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry.”

“It’s alright. Am I the first woman you’ve seen?” She asked, while entering her bedroom but not closing her sliding door all the way, inviting me to continue talking.

“Not exactly.”

“That’s evasive.”

“It’s a long and uninteresting story.” I assured, but she passed her head on the interstice, covering the rest of her body.

“We have time. But I understand. We all have secrets.” She disappeared again. The rustles of clothes filled the silence while I stayed quiet. We were about to live one ultimate mission together, and after that, we probably won't see each other again. But that wasn’t reason enough to become an easy talker. I never had been. I only knew combat, theft, violence. “I know the effect I have on your kind,” she finally blurted. “I’m not bragging, it’s a truth. I had been hunted and haunted my whole life, had to lurk in the dark, because I would have been tortured, raped, destroyed for the only reason that I am what I am.” The words rang loud and clear in my head as she opened the door completely. My eyes were glued on hers and I kept them there, as I didn’t want her to think that I was like the rest of them perverts. “I had to become the Shadow. This is no choice I made. What I did, choose, is that no man will ever touch me. In any way.”

I felt even more ashamed for looking at her the way I did. I wanted to explain myself, to repent from my mistakes because her speech touched something in my heart that I couldn’t analyze. It was just preposterous and devastating to see someone terrified and obligated to act in some way because of others deficiency and instability. “I don’t blame you,” she immediately stopped me when I had sat back on the couch, ready to apologize. “I don’t trust you, just like you don’t trust me. But I can see you’re not like them.” She took my breath away. “You know I won’t hesitate ending you if you ever happened to prove me wrong.”

I gulped. She had been so persecuted she could only rely on herself. Just like I did for all my life. But for clearly different reasons. “You won’t need to. I gave you my word.”

She nodded and smiled. “Besides, I’m not into men.”

And she went to sleep.

Mine didn’t find me for long hours, before it grabbed me by my shoulders and didn’t lose its grip until the early hours of the morning. Some of my dreams remained indiscernible, most of them actually, but the mysterious woman in them couldn’t possibly be forgotten.

Her face was hard to really determine, as the dreams felt real but stayed what they were. Dreams. When I woke up, nothing was tangible and the souvenirs remained blurry enough I could remember but not describe.

Her hair was fierce, a bright color, her eyes icy, and she either looked at me with spikes or smoothness. Her scent. Out of this world. Dark chocolate would fill my nose before I would realize her under my closed lids. My imagination had invented her completely and I couldn’t begin to understand why. I never read books with such characters before, nor did I see a woman resembling her in real life. It started at the beginning of the year and she never left me since.

Some nights she appeared, some she lingered but stayed afar. Unable to control, I would just navigate under the path my subconscious would decide on its own and wake up with a strange feeling creeping on my skin. This night, my mind had imagined her walking out of the shower to the kitchen, just like my new partner did the day before. With nothing but a long white t-shirt on, she aimed for the couch instead of the bedroom and straddled my lap in a painfully long exciting motion of her hips and legs.

Again, her body was always changing, as I couldn’t really grasp her, didn’t really know her, couldn’t control the feeling of her skin under my fingers that immediately fell on her thighs. My hands roamed and lifted the t-shirt to stroke her back slowly. My breath caught up and my heart pumped fast in my chest and everything was lethargic, weird to experience. The faint sensation of her lips over my neck rose chills on my entire body. But what undid me was her gasp in my ear, after I drove my hips up and connected with her through the fabric.

It also woke me up in sweat and trembling.

The sun hadn’t risen outside and my brain was banging hard over my skull, as I sat up on the couch and rubbed my eyes. I had fallen asleep with my clothes and hadn’t asked for a blanket. Not that it was needed. As I stood up and walked toward the shower, I caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror. Red cheeks, sweat covering my forehead, I looked feverish. And that was exactly what that imaginary woman had done to me.

I grabbed a fresh towel under the sink and entered the shower. The cold-water stream cooled my burning flesh and I stayed there long enough to finally feel better. I shivered going out, spending way too much time under the freezing water.

I dried most of the drops and tied my towel around my waist while entering the living room, warming up to the heat passing through the windows. “Already up?”

The Shadow’s voice erupted from the kitchen and I winced imperceptibly. Looking at her and seeing her smile, she must have caught that. “Rough night.”

“Make yourself comfortable, we’ll be here for a while.”

“How much is a while exactly?” I asked, reaching for my band and tying my wet hair up. She glimpsed at my arms and shoulders, my torso stretching. Only curiosity behind her eyes. I was very large compared to the average male. I had reduced my workouts in the last few months because of how tired it made me, but kept a reasonable pace to avoid losing all my strength.

“Enough for us to be prepared. What did your father feed you on?” Her stare was glued to my body.

“You don’t want to know.” I answered, fixated on her face.

“Drugs?”

“Probably. I was too young.”

“And now?” She crossed her arms, concentrated.

I grabbed a t-shirt and slid my underwear below my towel. “I’ve lost a lot. I eat what I can and I exercise.”

“It’s incredible.” She moved and approached me, lifted my t-shirt up without so much as a please. A strangled noise came out of my throat but I let her do it. “I never managed to attain this much muscle. I didn’t want to use these kinds of products.”

“You shouldn’t envy that. I’m a machine. A tool.”

She ogled me with some empathy in her eyes and I bit the inside of my cheeks. She had been alone but at least she wasn’t answering to anyone but herself. I had to follow orders for years, had been used over and over again for a few scraps and a satchel of gold. I wasn’t asked to think, even if I had chosen to refuse once or twice. Hidram wasn’t a tyrant, he didn’t attack me or punished me for the things that could have gone wrong. But I had no choice for the life I had lived. Until today.

“We’ll both have our revenge.” She stated, confident.

“What will you do after this?” I dared ask, continuing dressing up while she stepped back, giving me space. She shook her head.

“I’m not sure. This is what I need to do. It’s important to me. But leaving these people, it feels… wrong. We can’t do much about it.”

“We can’t do anything about it.” I interrupted. She looked down, played with the lace of her pants. “I didn’t know the Shadow was sentimental.”

When I thought she would push me, she only smiled faintly and answered. “It’s complicated. The Shadow isn’t. But Kâl is.”

I frowned. “Is Kâl your real name?” A nod. “It’s… original.”

“I know. I’ve always wondered why. Maybe because I don’t fit in here, and never will. Maybe because I’m destined to be elsewhere.”

I stayed quiet. A ray of the sun had ended on my arm and the heat of it forced me to change position. The day was well commenced now and I watched her expectantly, waiting for our next move. She had explained the plan for when we’ll be in Jalyon’s territory, but until then, I had no idea what was programmed.

“I have my regulars to see today. You can either stay here or follow me. But we’ll have to be discreet.”

“I’m not the first person to meet the Shadow?” I taunted, feeling more and more comfortable around her. She smiled genuinely.

“You wish. I didn’t know the Weapon was so flirty.” She turned and started putting her whole equipment on.

“The Weapon isn’t. But I guess that Nolis is.” I grabbed my jacket and she threw me a long cape and a hood to cover myself.

“Let’s get going, Nolis.” She lulled, and dragged me outside.