John was on his knees. He was looking off into the distance with a thousand-yard stare.

Under him was a pair a pair of eggs. One was red and the other was blue.

John didn't see any of them though.

In fact. John didn't see.

Instead, he heard the restrained melody of a trumpet along with the quite crinkling of an envelope.

~Aren't the sounds normally louder?~

John asked himself.

John couldn't think of a single reason why the sounds changed.

~I…. I almost feel like I forgot something. Oh well. If I forgot it then it probably wasn't important.~

John's head began to fall.

~I'm tired. I need to sleep.~

THUNK!

His head slammed into the ground.

He was asleep.

...…

When John next awoke the morning sun was glaring against his eyes. The sound of crackling fire filled his ears and a pain filled his mind.

Groggily John brought his head up.

~How long did I sleep? And why does everything hurt?~

John looked down at himself.

His body was covered in burns. His skin was peeling off and his flesh was exposed and red.

~What happened to me?....~

"Haaaaaaa….."

~Oh. Right. The dragon. That's what happened.~

As John looked down at his burnt flesh he couldn't help but think.

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~How am I not dead?~

He could only attribute that to the system-enforced stats that he had gained over the past week or so.

~It hurts though.~

Make no mistake. John was in constant agony right now.

Every single fibre of his being was unleashing clawing discordant screeches of pain

It was a miracle that he could even think through that agony.

~I need to eat.~

From war, hunger is born. And from hunger pain is born. And from pain hunger is born again. And from pain and hunger, there is war born once more. Therefore John was possessed with a single overwhelming desire.

To eat.

Almost instantly after the birth of that desire, John's eyes began to dart around. He analyzed the most important variables around him.

In front of him were three eggs.

To his right was a pile of large white bones that had a quilt of flaming blue scales on top of them.

After seeing that John knew for certain what he had to do.

~STAND!~

With a ferocious command, John forced his body to stand up.

Then with ten hammering stomps, he walked towards the bones.

John grabbed onto a bone within the pile and used it to pick up the scales.

He licked his lips as he looked a the flaming scales.

~Boiled eggs anyone.~

John placed the scales down right next to the eggs.

With a wince of agony from the stinging of his hands he picked up each egg and placed it on top of the scales.

The sound of the eggs sizzling filled John's ears.

~Yes. Finally. I will eat good food. Something better than ash. ~

It was the happiest moment of John's day.

....

John spent the next few minutes patiently sitting back and waiting until he thought his eggs would be finished. Then finally after a few minutes of waiting something happened....

"YIP!"

"JESUS MALARKY MAELSTROM!" Screamed John.

Standing in the fire were three reptilian creatures.

One with light green scales. One with deep red scales and finally one with artic blue scales.

They looked at John with big beady eyes.

~The eggs….. Hatched?~

John could only look at the dragons in confusion.

What kind of eggs hatch in a fire?!?! And why were those reptiles laxly standing in the fire as if it was just your ordinary Sunday?!?!?!?! The eggs should be burning they should be cooking.

All logic states that they should be cooking.

Yet here the reptiles stood.

John frowned at the sight of them.

He was staunchly against the idea of ever missing a meal. To John that was the ultimate sin. Right now his meal had just changed in a way he had never expected. But John could still avoid missing a meal. If he...

~Should I eat them?~

He looked at the three small dragons a squint of deep contemplation on his face.

~Should I?~

On one hand, if John ate the dragons he would get to avoid skipping a meal and he'd get to savour a new kind of food.

On the other hand. The reptiles looked like babies. So if he ate them then he would be eating babies.

~What do I do? What do I do?~

Eat babies or skip a meal. It was a bianary decesion.

"Haaaaaaa."

~I can't do it. I won't eat them.~

You heard it here first folks! Eating babies is worse than skipping a meal! WHO WOULD HAVE KNOWN?!?!?!?!?!?!?

~I could go and eat one of the meals that the bomb cooked.~

With a wince of pain, John stood up to do just that.

"Hmmm. Hmmmmm. Hmmm."

As he walked he hummed a tune that was familiar to him. But one that he was also sure he had never heard before.

~This would sound way better on a trumpet.~

After a few minutes of walking John found a good corpse.

As he bent down to grab the corpse he saw three strange images.

Below John were three reptiles.

One had green scales. Another had Red scales. And the final one had artic blue scales. All three also possessed large wings in comparison to their body size.

They looked up at John with their wide beady eyes.

~Why are they following me around?~

The red dragon burped. It let out a small burst of flames.

John's face paled.

~It'sgoingtoburnmeIt'sgoingtoburnmeIt'sgoingtoburnmeIt'sgoingtoburnme~

"YOU LITTLE SHITS! SCRAM!"

For a momment the reptials stared at John. A look of confusion covered their faces.

Then they issued their response.

"ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAR!"

They would not scram.

John looked at them with pure terror.

His hands darted downwards and he snatched up the cooked corpse from the floor. He unhinged his jaw and threw it into his mouth.

GULP

He swallowed the corpse.

The sound of crunching bones echoed through his stomach.

{Skill gained: Steel—}

"SHUT UP!"

John's fist flew into the screen.

He turned around and started to speed shuffle away at the maximum speed possible.

~I will never even touch those DRAGONS!~

End of chap.

Time-traveling marshmellows.

The power of friendship but in the shape of a wall.

Large watermelon chest.

Boobs.

HEHEHEHEEHEHEHE!