Chapter 68 – A Forest of Heights

Adam sat on his haunches and looked at the dry, rocky ground of the tunnel. Raising his torch, he used his other hand to brush some dead grass and gravel out of the way. Luckily, the crumbled shapes of the leaf-vein-like patterned trail were still there, although they had lost their light.

Earlier, before the great fight in the Node of Ziecherhein, all the tunnels they’d seen had at least one of these patterned trails, called Associations. Brightly shining in their goldish-green light, they had shone on the trees, bushes, and statues, guiding the way towards a new Node. He hadn’t expected to miss elements of the Realm as they used to be, but there he was.

“Still sure we’re going in the right direction?” Emily asked, standing behind him.

Adam nodded as he got to his feet. And what a beautiful direction it is. The flickering light of their torches licked the tunnel’s glistening stone walls, the rows of faceless wooden statues that lined them, and the dead branches of the Overgrowth. Although Adam and Emily had left the destructive quake far behind them by now, occasional, subtler tremors made the ground quiver. “Well, there should be a Node at the end of this patterned trail. If that one doesn’t give us the info we need, we can use those pedestals on top of the pyramid to pick a path to a Node useful to us.”

“May I suggest taking some of these other tunnels into consideration?” Emily asked dryly as she paced on, gesturing casually at one of the gaping holes of darkness at their sides. “They might not have one of these dead trails, but that might prove less of a hindrance to our schedule than getting caved in while stubbornly following one.”

Adam snickered as he followed her. Sure enough, the walls and ceiling were creeping closer after every tremor. Once, the walls of the tunnels had been covered in detailed hieroglyphs depicting scenes from Caine’s daily life. From cooking and praying, to putting clothes on a rebelling Eric. However, as all life and colour leaked away from the tunnel, the hieroglyphs were blurring and fading. The faces of the depicted people were first to disappear, before the images themselves dissolved into grey rock.

Mildly more problematic than the loss of art were the frequent groans of crumbling stone far behind them. There was no way the tunnel’s entrance was still free.

Adam swallowed and rubbed the scars on his wrist. He sure wasn’t claustrophobic, but the threat of tons of dropping rock still had his respect. “Although I must concur,” he said in a fake posh accent. “I’d actually prefer my tunnels to actually lead somewhere. Preferably, they do not smell like death and rot like the last one you suggested.”

“I didn’t smell a thing!”

“And I wholeheartedly believe you,” Adam said as he carefully stepped over the sad skull of some large animal. “Judging by the last time you cooked.”

She grinned back at him and kicked some gravel in his direction. “Ha, ha, so funny. Sure makes me feel a whole lot safer knowing that we’re following your nose and your… weird draft.”

“Well, there is a draft, look!” He held up his torch and pointed at the flame quivering sideways. “See? That must be coming from somewhere!”

She raised an eyebrow. “Knowing the Realm of Remembrance, it might be some giant butt-ugly monster panting into the tunnel.”

“Hmm, it doesn’t smell like one, this time.” His brows furrowed; his first association with the scent of the draft in here was… home. He blinked, unsure if it was a trick caused by Caine’s memories. “Is that—”

The tremors increased. The rumble of trembling stone echoed through the tunnel as tiny bits of gravel were falling from the ceiling. Adam and Emily ceased their discussion be and hurried farther into the cave. Adam kept himself from looking at the walls, knowing they were inching just a bit closer. Again.

Adam frowned as they marched on. Sniffing deeply, he noticed other aromas besides the familiar smell of earth and dead vegetation. A fresh wind which carried something alive. Are those pine trees, maybe?

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After a while, Adam and Emily rounded the last corner of the tunnel, where the blueish light of the moon and stars poured in. Gratefully, Adam finally exited the damned tunnel and stepped into… a forest. He blinked in confusion as he stepped between the dewy ferns and mosses.

“No way…” With a surprised smile, Emily looked at the tall, healthy conifer and cedar trees, perfectly adapted to the height of the mountains around Gotterburg, the forested heights they’d played in so often while growing up.

Adam smiled. His heart pained with the yearning to be back home again. Something inside him wanted to believe coming back could be that easy; he wanted to keep the illusion they were actually out for a little while longer. But, after a closer look, the stars turned out to be glowing crystals in the deep blue ceiling high above them. The wind that shook the branches was air circling through the wide cavern. Reflections on the walls showed moving images, creating the impression they were truly in the forested mountains. However, there were chirps of crickets. Squirrels skittered across branches. Brightly glowing Association patterns crisscrossed the place; this cave within the Realm seemed oddly intact. Alive, even.

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“Look.” Adam pointed up. The wide pine trees were actually columns which supported the vast ceiling. And up there, in the multitude of colours in the rustling branches and needles of the nearest one, Adam saw… memories.

A family near a tent. Louis warmed his hands at a campfire, while Vera—his wife and the mother of Caine and Emily—was resting her head upon his shoulder. She absent-mindedly rocked a little sleeping Emily on her arm. Meanwhile, a young Caine waddled around to chase a frog through the undergrowth. After a gush of wind shook the branches, the scene changed. This time, it was an adult Caine who made a campfire. Little Eric, at the same age as Caine used to be just now, sat and played with stuffed animals.

Adam watched with a bittersweet smile and eyes that started to itch. He’d never noticed how much the boy he thought to be his own looked like his buddy Caine. Valiantly trying to suppress the false longing for his ‘wife’ and ‘kid’, he tore his eyes away. Who knew, maybe he had taken his own child and their mother on little trips like these. Maybe he’d taught them how to recognise the sounds of owls in the forest. Maybe he had a family. Or, well, someone at all who was missing him out there.

Emily sighed as they explored the pleasant forest. “Must be nice, being near Gotterburg again.”

Adam took a lung full of fresh air and stretched his arms. “Can’t wait.” Hmm, now that we aren’t fighting for our lives, for a change, this might actually be the right time. “So…”

“So?” she replied, raising an eyebrow.

Wow, I’m so good at this. “Well, what would you like to do when we’re out of the Realm?”

“Hmm…” Her mouth still smiled, subtly. But Adam saw her looking away already. “Same things as you, I think. Making sure Caine is safe from… err... you know who.” She tossed a small stick, which tumbled from a treetrunk into a group of mushrooms. “I will have to report to the Penduli though. They ought to know what happened in Caine’s Realm of Remembrance,” she stated matter-of-factly. There was just a hint of tension around her mouth as she looked up at him. Maybe she wondered how he would react, but she kept her expression neutral; her mask was on for now.

Adam nodded and worked his jaw. There it is. “I figured. So, have you been a member for a long time?”

Emily stopped walking. With a sigh, she closed her eyes for a moment, as if she was trying to be patient. “Okay, it’s even worse when you try to act all nice about these kinds of things. Spit it out. I know you’re mad about me being a Pendulum.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “So, bring it.”

He stopped as well. “That’s not what troubles me, it’s that you’ve actively lied about it.”

Emily raised her hands in frustration. “I just hadn’t told you yet, and can you blame me?! You and Oliver were furious about the Penduli and I had to cooperate with you somehow! Besides, I was doubting whether I wanted to stay a member at the time. Before Oliver barfed up his ‘grand scheme’ I thought the Penduli were ‘cleaning up’ and that Caine had sent assassins for me!”

Adam mulled it over while rubbing the deep scars on his wrist, beneath his bracer. “Pretty sure that counts as a lie by omission, but okay, I can imagine. It’s just…” He sighed. “Quite a big thing to find out so late.”

Emily’s eyebrows rose to her hairline. “Oh, trust me,” she said, lowering her voice to an icy whisper. “I know the feeling. That you think you know someone but new facts keep popping up out of nowhere? Sounds familiar.”

Adam’s mouth twitched. “Well, only one of us had a choice in the matter. I’m learning new things about my past life every damned day around here and it’s surprisingly difficult to enlighten you about things I don’t remember myself.”

“I know.” She sighed. “And I know you’ve changed since the War of the Prophet. But there are so many strange things that you’ve done or have happened to you, which you and I don’t know about. Makes me wonder if I really know you at all. And somehow you have a, well…” She glanced up at the memory of Caine’s family and opened her mouth a bit as if she wasn’t sure what to say. Or rather, how to say it.

“…Yeah?” Adam made a beckoning motion with his hand. “Bring it,” he repeated her words with an empty smile. He knew what was coming.

“Well… a child,” she said, looking up at him with those big orange eyes. Adam tried to read what lay behind them, but she hid her emotions well. Anger? Sadness? Guilt, even? “You don’t remember, do you?”

Adam sighed deeply and closed his eyes. “It’s maddening,” he let that statement hang in the air between them for a moment. “I don’t know if I was there during their first steps or heard their first words. I’ve been trying to remember so damn hard, but I’m not even sure who the mother is!”

Emily watched Adam in silence, peering at his face. Maybe she looked for signs of a lie, but she wouldn’t find any.

“I don’t even know if I’ve been there for the child, you know?” Adam muttered. “Years ago, Ie swore I’d be a better father than dad was. But who knows, maybe I was worse. I may’ve been gone for years.”

Emily tutted her mouth and peered into the distance. “Hmm… well, let’s look at the facts. What do we know?”

“Oliver said that he found out that I survived my execution, after which he’s tried to get info out of me for a while. However, it turned out that I had forgotten a lot of things after the disaster of Ziecherhein, including all my knowledge about Reminiscence, so he didn’t succeed at the time. He Tainted me afterwards, or maybe multiple times during this process, as I had no idea about this when I met him again in Gotterburg.” With a shiver, Adam remembered the Ironglass whip Oliver had conjured to use on a Thaler. Somehow, his subconsciousness did remember that.

Emily frowned sourly. “And he kept your survival a secret to the world, probably locked you up somewhere. Vile. But did he find out right after the execution, and has he done experiments for years? Or did he capture you at a later point?”

Adam rubbed the scars on his wrist. “And if so, what did I do in the meantime? Start a family, perhaps?”

“It’s theoretically possible that you’ve never known about the child, though,” Emily said, resuming her walk. It seemed like she was much more comfortable now the topic of the Penduli was over. “Or, since Caine knew about the child, that you used to be involved as a father but have forgotten during the disaster of Ziecherhein.”

“There must be an explanation, somewhere. But one thing is certain: I swear I am going to find them and be a father.” He glanced up at the memories in the trees around him. Hoping to catch a glimpse of his kid in the multitude of Caine’s memories, he’d picked up a habit of checking them for anything that remotely resembled a child. “Maybe Caine can lead us to them, once we’ve saved—”

Standing still as a statue, Emily peered in the distance and placed an index finger on her lips. “Up there,” she gestured in sign language.

From her change in demeanour, Adam reflexively crouched into a ready stance. Farther ahead, behind several dead trees, there was a distinct green glow of a Reminiscence Invocation. Focusing on his hearing, Adam even noticed a strange non-verbal chanting in the distance.

Adam and Emily nodded to each other and snuck towards it.