Luna

was proving to be a more difficult to cast than I thought. Krahinn imprinted the information into my mind, but actually using it was not as simple as I had hoped. When I asked him during breakfast what I was doing wrong, Krahinn gave me the incredibly helpful answer that I was trying too hard. First I wasn’t putting out enough effort, now I am trying too hard. I wish I could slap that finicky when he did crap like that. Even when he was being helpful, he still enjoyed messing with you. I sighed as I leaned against one of the trees in the courtyard. It was funny seeing him tease Grisbane. That aggravating nature of his was nice when you weren’t the target. I closed my eyes, laughing a bit as I recalled Grisbane backpedaling hard to try and escape the mess of her own creation. Krahinn did sound like the Burgomaster a little there. There was a nice breeze today as the air was pleasant and crisp. I took a deep breath, relaxing against the tree before I went to begin today’s lessons. Then it felt like I sort of fell backwards.

I jolted up, looking around. What? How? Wait, was that what Krahinn meant? I was currently in the Hollow Hovel. This tavern used to be where the Burgomaster would meet people off the record. It was weird being able to see myself walk into the tavern as I got dragged along. Krahinn really didn’t provide much of an instruction manual on how this worked, so this was going to be a learning experience. Sitting at her favorite booth was the Fae that was the Burgomaster. She was wearing a sleek white suit with a black accent which stood out against her light green skin. Her hair was the same long, fiery red which matched her bright orange eyes. Like all Fae, she had pointed ears. Next to her was Nautilus, who was the spitting image of how she currently looked. You know, I never knew what race Nautilus is. She never seemed to age, so it was something with a long-life span.

“Nautilus, darling, don’t leave yet. Who’s going to protect me if you go?” the Burgomaster whined as Nautilus was yawning.

“Hello you two.” I chimed casually. So, I get to rewatch what happened. It made sense based off what Krahinn told me.

“Hey Luna.” The Burgomaster replied with a smile.

“Fo’ the’ last time, ya don’ need me t’ protect ya all th’ time.” Nautilus retorted, keeping her eyes on the Burgomaster.

“But I dooooo; it’s so lonely when you’re gone.” The Burgomaster insisted. Nautilus gave her a playful smile.

“Fine, if ya insis’.” Nautilus conceded, sitting back down next to the Burgomaster who was smiling wide. A few seconds later, the Burgomaster was in her lap as Nautilus began shamelessly kissing her neck.

“Some of us are single you know.” I spat at them as I sat down.

“Be jealous on your own time. You wanted to talk to me, not the other way around.” The Burgomaster shot back as she looked like she was in heaven.

“I had some information you might be keen on, but I guess it’s not that important.” I taunted. The Burgomaster let out the faintest of smirks before she made a pouting face. Nautilus began glaring at me. She really had Nautilus wrapped around her finger.

“Wha’ ya got?” Nautilus snapped. Her silver eyes were so intense as past me tried not to let the fear show.

“I hear nothing supposedly removed Modinar off the map in a single . According to people, he scorched the entire country after summoning the sun.” I explained. I remember that I wanted to believe the rumors were exaggerated, but now I knew he had used to evaporate Modinar.

“Ya right!” Nautilus laughed. We all chuckled at it. Yea, it wasn’t a joke. I wondered what Krahinn wondered in these moments. Seeing memories of yourself being dumb, saying things that you knew would end poorly, or events that lead to horrific disasters later. This was still when we thought he could be defeated. Unfortunately, we hadn’t had that cold water thrown in our faces yet.

“What a brazen rumor.” The Burgomaster chortled, nuzzling Nautilus.

“I thought it was ridiculous, but some of the people were terrified by whatever they witnessed. Something happened to Modinar.” I pointed out. Looking back, how could I not notice when the Burgomaster was so blatantly scheming? Despite the fact she was acting romantically with Nautilus, she clearly was fishing for more information.

“I don’t understand what you mean. How could a destroy an entire Kingdom?” the Burgomaster probed, barely looking at me as a few powerful ales arrived for the table. How did I drink those and not die?

I did understand her skepticism here, as Tenebrae had never seen a of that magnitude at this point. To be fair, the second time was when Nil killed Nautilus. Modinar was annihilated now, but the ‘hero’ was still alive. And the ‘hero’ had quite an axe to grind with Nil over Nil evaporating Modinar. Now that I thought about it, this was probably the point where things went from bad to worse. How optimistic we were here as none of us realized how on the edge Nil was. Argranz was dead and the Magus Uprising was over, with Modinar having bankrolled a lot of it. Nil had retaliated by using the highly destructive as he now sat on the throne. Clearly, the Burgomaster hadn’t begun playing with the fire that led to Nil killing her, which then set off the events that got rid of the last shred of Nil’s compassion and understanding. Little did we know Tenebrae was on the brink of disaster. It’s mind boggling someone like the Void King orchestrated this. I know he likely caused or contributed to a lot of it, but just recalling the sheer despair and annihilation that the events left in their wake you got to wonder how those he manipulated didn’t realize it was not going to end well.

“I don’t know the specifics. Just figured it was an interesting rumor you might be intrigued by.” I replied. The Burgomaster was making kissy faces at Nautilus who happily obliged. Why did Nautilus like that? I should be studying how Nautilus reacted to the Burgomaster rather than reliving and reminiscing what was to come.

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“I’ll probe into it. You can leave now. I need someone to sweep me off my feet now.” The Burgomaster stated with a dismissive hand wave. She really was an unpleasant individual.

“You know I’m still a noble? I also do sponsor quite a bit of Avon, so would it kill you to be politer?” I snapped at her. I was so young and dumb; holy Lords above I was an idiot. With hindsight, I knew the Burgomaster cared very little for me, she just liked that I had information and connections to Speranza she could use.

“Still being the operative word. How’s your father doing by the way?” The Burgomaster replied calmly. I shot up but was given a glare by Nautilus as she debated knocking my lights out.

“It’s okay dearie. Luna was just leaving.” The Burgomaster cooed. I stormed off, slamming the doors open on my way out of the Hollow Hovel.

“Stupid bezka. She acts all high and mighty because she has Nautilus protecting her.” I grumbled as I ran with my tail tucked between my legs, pounding the ale I took with me.

I walked through Avon again, seeing the night life roar around me as I made my way to the Ozlong Outlook. Past me slumped against the tree, feeling frustrated at how the Burgomaster acted. It was so painfully obvious looking at the events what she thought of me. But I was desperate to make a new life here. Did I learn anything useful? It was kind of what I remembered, the Burgomaster having Nautilus wrapped around her finger. What did she do that Helga didn’t? I mean, the Burgomaster shamelessly showed Nautilus affection in public was about all I could immediately think of. There had to be more to it. According to Krahinn, I likely know the answer but just don’t realize it. I needed a different memory more than likely, as this one was a very brief meeting before I was more ingratiated with the Burgomaster and Nautilus. My priorities were so messed up back then. Being honest, I wouldn’t have liked me either. At least I finally cast the properly, so I just had to end it and try again hoping for a more useful memory. Wait, how did one end this ? I struggled to even cast it. Great, I was going to be along for the ride until my ran out. What else happened this night? The details were fuzzy thanks to that ale I was pounding.

“I try and be nice and that is my reward.” I spat into the wind. My speech was totally not slurred from how wasted past me was. To be fair, that was ale for Nautilus I swiped, and I was not much of a drinker. Nearby, I saw Nil step out. Wait. I talked to Nil?

“Greetings Lady Dawnsfield.” Nil said politely as he walked calmly towards me.

His appearance was what I remembered, just younger. It was odd seeing his eyes being white and amber rather than the black and amber he currently possessed. His eyes had such dark bags under them; Nil looked horrible, like the world was crushing him. Why was he here? How did I forget this? I had a horrible feeling in my stomach. It was so obvious looking at him how much he was struggling, how much all the death around him weighed him down. His eyes weren’t as bitter or hateful as they eventually got. I really didn’t want to see what was about to happen, as I suspected it was not going to be good.

“Buzz off nothing.” I spat at Nil. He let out a deep sigh.

“Why are you in Avon? Your father is worried sick about you.” Nil replied calmly.

“At least I have my father.” I shot back at him. How much that stung was so soul crushingly obvious. Why was I such a stuck-up brat? I wanted to slap myself.

“Lady Dawnsfield, your father may not have much longer. Please stay by his side. It’s his dying wish.” Nil pleaded. I know I don’t say yes. I thought he’d get better, but I refused to see the reality that was in front of me. Wow, I did that a lot looking back. I realized too late that turning back time should be impossible.

“Forl off. You just want me back in Speranza!” I growled at Nil.

“Lady Dawnsfield, as much as I’d appreciate you returning, your father is quite ill. I swear to the Lords you really should return to say your goodbyes.” Nil tried. I wanted to scream at past me to take Nil’s hand and return home. How was I such a rotten demon to my dad? You deserved a better daughter; I really didn’t deserve you. Thankfully now I was able to spend time with him. Do things that made him proud rather than act like the bezka I used to be.

“I don’t need your stupid lies. You just want me to go back and be your happy little baby maker!” I yelled at Nil. Nil’s expression as he stared back was complicated. Knowing him now, that look on his face was undeniably self-loathing. He blamed himself.

“My parents are dead Luna; our engagement was annulled. Your father begged me to bring you home so he could see you one last time. I’m trying to grant what is likely his final wish.” Nil stated dejectedly. I remember we were temporarily engaged last time; it was why I fled to Avon. I could only wonder knowing what I knew about Nil now, how much that hurt him.

“Good thing, they won’t have to witness your bitter failure as Speranza crumbles to the ground.” I shot back. I. I. I really said those words. I said them. To Nil. I. This is awful. I didn’t want to remember that. His face looked so bitter and resentful.

“Here’s a note for when you are more sober. Should you feel like changing your mind, simply put a bit of into it.” Nil sighed as he handed me an envelope. Past me just swat it on the ground. Nil sighed before vanishing with a step. I saw myself grabbing it and burning it to ash as the world shook.

In an instant, Nil and Krahinn were standing in front of me. Nil looked concerned while Krahinn had his usual disinterested expression. I wrapped my arms around Nil, hugging him tight. Nil seemed a bit surprised as I hugged myself deep into him. This Nil is the best Nil. Nil originally shifted a little before realizing I wasn’t letting go. He hugged me back, nestling his head on mine. I was such an awful demon. Why did you forgive how I acted towards you and give me a second chance? Nil wrapped around me a bit protectively, gently running his hand up and down my back. I could sense a few presences, but Krahinn simply made the three of us vanish somewhere else as I hugged Nil. I’m so sorry for how I acted. I will be better; I will be nothing like how I was last time. No wonder Krahinn called that a curse; it let you relive your worst moments whether you liked it or not. I just settled into Nil. I knew I was a spoiled brat, but I didn’t realize just how bad I was. Nil just stayed there, holding me close to him. His felt so pleasant to be near; it was so comforting.

“It’s okay Luna.” Nil assured me.

“I know. I know. Thank you, Nil.” I replied, staying where I was.

“What happened?” Nil inquired as he wasn’t moving an inch.

“That is awful. I just got to remember probably one of my worst nights ever.” I informed Nil.

“I’m sorry you had to relive that.” Nil apologized. I should be apologizing to you.

“It was me being the worst. Lords I hate past me. It just hurt to see how dumb and self-absorbed I used to be.” I confessed, nuzzling my head into him a bit.

“Okay. I’m here for you. Take all the time you need.” Nil told me as his arms wrapped around me a bit tighter.

“I know.” I stated, enjoying him hugging me.

“I will always try to protect you.” Nil added on. He’s such a sappy dork. I could feel myself begin to smile as I leaned in. Why did I ever act like you were the worst thing to happen to me? You’d always protect what matters. Then it clicked.

“Nil, you’re the best.” I told him, as he looked a bit befuddled back at me suddenly being happy. I did indeed know the answer the entire time.

“You’re welcome by the way.” Krahinn interjected with a dry tone. I slowly stood up with Nil who realized I was fine now.

“And thank you too Krahinn.” I stated as I gave him a quick hug. He looked baffled by the act, but that was for a later time.

“Did you figure something out?” Nil checked with a smile.

“I did. Thank you for being you, Nil.” I replied as I now needed to put what I knew into action.