We went to the church’s sanctuary again, each taking turns to pray while the other kept watch out of earshot. We wanted to ensure we didn’t accidentally disclose something to unauthorized third parties, local sentient beings, or whatever.

I kept it brisk, addressing my prayer to Clare and carbon-copying all instances of Eura in case she still had some agency here. I even revised my previous request, asking to come home after finishing all the agreed-upon tasks. Towards the end, I added customary pleas for general safety and peace, leaving it up to them to decide how to make it happen. This was getting to be above my pay grade, after all.

Nora, who had only decided to address her prayer to Clare, took much longer than expected. I began to worry about what she was unloading at CUP. They were on our side… maybe? So don’t make them too angry! Eventually, Nora exited the sanctuary.

“Now, will you tell me what you asked for?” I asked.

“Mmm. God-like powers to do anything I want. But also the meaning of NAUGHT, as in the acronym.”

“W-what?!”

“It’s still bothering me!”

“My exclamation was about the first part!”

“What? The more unreasonable your initial request is, the more likely you are to get a more innocuous one approved! Ask for the moon, get a moon rock?”

“Innocuous?”

“Inoffensive, harmless, mild.”

Innocuous didn’t sound innocuous to me. “Oh.”

She opened her journal and leafed through the pages. “Nothing yet. Just the old letter.” She had folded it back up and stuck it inside the journal sleeve.

“You’re going to be checking that all day, huh?”

“Yep.”

We made our way into the communal kitchen, where Aleph had made a beany porridge with chunks of apple. It needed cinnamon and sugar, but none was to be found. I portioned out my serving and brought it to the dining room.

“Thank you for breakfast,” I said to Aleph, trying to be polite while knowing that there are only so many ways to mix and match the same ingredients.

“It’s lunch!” Tetora rumbled from the seat across from me. “Breakfast came and went while you slept in!”

“... I’m okay with that.”

Nora sat next to me. “I have some more questions about what we talked about yesterday.”

“I will do my best to answer them,” Aleph responded.

“Euphridia traveled alone to Naught once,” Nora recalled from the Book of Origins. Oh, she was jumping right in before I even finished eating!

“Yes.”

“And she made everything from it.”

“This world and then all that fills it,” Aleph agreed.

“Did she do it from the heavens?”

“Heavens?” Aleph tilted his head. “I do not know the meaning of the word.” Have they never heard of heaven?

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Nora took a long pause, scrunching her face in thought. “Another word for a place where Euphridia might reside.”

“Ah, you are referring to Paradise,” he said sadly. “Yes, there was a time when all lived there.”

Nora exhaled slightly before continuing. “Where is it now? Paradise… the... birthplace of all creation...” I could feel Clare giving Nora a corporate thumbs-up.

“It is forever lost to humanity. None may go there now save Euphridia herself.” Suspicious.

Nora tried again. “But.. physically, where is it?”

“I know not.” I almost thought he said naught. Turning, I gave Nora my most arrogant and smug look. See, I told you he didn’t know anything about it.

“Relias would know, though, right?” I asked Aleph after Nora rolled her eyes at me. “He was there too, once.”

Aleph and Tetora exchanged a long glance.

Aleph shifted in his seat. “Most likely, however…”

Tetora turned away. “He does not like to talk about it.”

“It pains him greatly to speak of Paradise. It is where he lost her.” Aleph’s eyes fixated on the table then. “Do you know who I am talking about?”

“Yes, I know.”

He was speaking about Raela, of course. Even I remembered the prologue. The first human of Speranza, compassionate to all, paid the price of being too naïve. She had unknowingly found the Origin of Sin one day while exploring the wilderness beyond and had escorted him to meet the Goddess herself. He repaid her kindness by ripping her heart out in front of everyone. Relias had been spared from directly witnessing the evil one’s gruesome introduction, but he had been forced to deal with the aftermath ever since.

We all sat in silence for a few minutes, probably reliving the confusing parable advising you shouldn’t be friendly to strangers, at least ones that are demon kings in disguise. It was the hook that drew me in as a fan when I was younger, stirring inside of me an indignant, deep-seated rage I couldn’t ever adequately explain out loud. That gut-wrenching feeling would dissipate a little with every dribble of further exposition, though. Obsessively, I would check the landing page to see if a chapter was posted, even though I had notifications enabled. When a chapter haphazardly materialized, I would pray that her seventh reincarnation would get one step closer to securing world peace, getting well-deserved revenge, and finally ending up with her true love. I’d reread the older chapters to see if I missed some hint or foreshadowing of a happy ending. I commented regularly, asking questions that were never really answered. Ultimately, I wasted my time with the spiraling story that never paid off.

Except I was in it now as an adult… sort of. I mean, I looked like one, anyway. And I would have to deal with all that past nonsense that didn’t concern me, along with the present nonsense I found myself wading through.

“Just forget about paradise,” Tetora advised with a sigh. “If it had existed, it is gone now. If it did not…” You would spend a lifetime searching for naught. Oh, I just did it to myself! Enough with this!

“We were just curious, that’s all.” I focused on food, hoping to drop the subject for now. Our sagely subject matter expert wasn’t here to continue the discussion, anyway.

Aleph, however, did not comply with my silent wish. “What do you mean, if it existed?”

“Ah.” Tetora’s ears flattened back. “Of course, it existed. I mean, here. Physically here.”

“You deny everything you cannot see! When you close your eyes, do you stop existing, too?”

Tetora snarled at Nora and I. “Now look at what you two started!”

“... I have to pack!” Having discarded the rest of her mush, Nora turned traitor and tail, leaving me behind.

Think, Rachel! Before you get in the middle of this! “Uh… I should clean the kitchen, shouldn’t I?”

“That would be for the best, little one,” Aleph murmured as he continued to pin Tetora with the glare only a grandmaster could give. Tetora gave me a side glance, mentally suggesting he would double training until further notice. Crud.

I picked up Nora’s discarded bowl along with my own and ran for the kitchen.

“Good tidings on this joyful day, Rachel!” Father Baram was heading towards the dining room with a bowl of the communal mush.

“Oh, you don’t want to go in there right now, Father,” I warned him.

“Is… there a problem? If there is, I should probably…” He trailed off as he heard the two of them arguing in earnest.

“Er, I thought you might want to eat outside today. Where it’s peaceful?”

He stared at the door that separated him from the philosophical and/or theological chaos inside. “Yes. That sounds like a wonderful idea.” See? There. I saved one sheep from the slaughter. It was time to leave the church now.